by Nel Franks
PART TWO
GAIA
Second Year of Initiate Acolytes
Transition to Year Two in Initiates
Gaia, Spring, Year Two, Initiates
ROSIE REMAINED DEEPLY disturbed by the events of Winter Ceremony. Nothing Tomma or I said to her seemed to help her break out of the fear, or her resistance to talking about it. Gradually she became able to talk about ordinary everyday events, and even to smile again. But she never spoke about her reaction, even when Tomma in her usual blunt manner tried to get her to open up. Tomma believed that Rosie had never thought about how pleasurable intercourse could be.
‘Have you never seen the stallions or the bulls mating with the females?’ she asked Rosie.
Rosie grimaced and turned away. Tomma persisted.
‘Well, I have. In Agriculture, I actually saw quite a lot of it. And you know what, Rosie? The females don’t seem to mind, or at least, not for long.’ She made a wry mouth. ‘Actually, they resist sometimes; it isn’t like the stallion gets his own way all the time. I’ve seen the mares kick him in the jaw and run away. Doesn’t stop him, but it does slow him down.’
Rosie looked fiercely satisfied by that.
‘But what I’m trying to say Rosie, is that it isn’t always as dramatic or scary as it was in the Temple. I’ve seen matings where the mare backs up to the stallion, and flicks her tail up out of the way, and seems to be really enjoying it.’
Rosie looked mutinous and shook her head.
‘They do, Rosie!’ Tomma insisted.
‘Anyway Rosie, surely it’s logical that not every human impregnation is as confronting as the Ceremony,’ I offered. ‘Look at how the women go to the Festival field. They are really looking forward to it.’
Rosie shook her head vehemently. ‘I’ll never go the Field!’ she hissed.
‘But Rosie,’ Tomma ploughed on. ‘If there’s no impregnation, there are no babies. So if you want to have one, like you said ages ago, you’ll have to go through impregnation. What happened to wanting to Serve in the Temple so you could have a baby?’
She shook her head again but didn’t say anything further. And finally, Tomma had the sense to leave it alone.
In mid-spring, with the trees in new leaf, it was time for our minor transition to our second year of Initiate Acolytes. The whole ceremony was much more homely and less dramatic than our initial transition into the Acolytes. We sat in the Small Reverencing Hall with the tutors from our new Houses. Our task was to sew the band and ribbon that represented our new House and first discipline around the hems of all our robes. I think the rotation I had spent in Crafts Clothing must have had some impact because I could certainly sew better this time round.
This year, I had been placed in the House of Administration. The contrast between my new black band and the light green ribbon indicating my status as a Clerk looked very attractive, I thought. The tutor, who was sitting with me and one other girl, said it was quite rare to take on junior acolytes like us, but there were some activities which needed catching up. She said they had a huge pile of documents that had accrued in the Office.
‘You might think the Most’s Office would be a wonderfully organised place,’ she grinned, ‘but it’s not. The Most just rushes through, giving out orders as she goes, and everybody has to leave what they are doing and jump to some new task. Things are always getting left half done. That’s why we need you two. You’re going to be the most appreciated people in the Office!’
The other girl, Melly, didn’t look like she thought it was going to be much fun, but I was really interested to find out more about how things were administered, and where the goods came from that we didn’t make ourselves.
Tomma had been placed in the House of Sustenance, in the Bakery to begin with. She wasn’t very excited, but she thought she might get to work in the kitchens on meals.
‘At least I’ll get to see where the sheep I looked after ended up,’ she said with grim humour. Rosie had been placed in Agriculture, in Gardens to begin with. I hoped the gentle nature of growing plants might help her heal.
My first day in the House of Administration turned out to be very boring. There were lectures from the Mistresses about alphabetical filing (really, did they think we had never put anything in order before?), and the incredibly confidential nature of everything we did, and how we mustn’t speak about anything we read or saw. I felt very cynical about all this secrecy – surely the members of the Enclave knew how they were administered?
There weren’t many workers in House of Administration. At lunchtime one day in the first week, one of the more punctilious senior clerks, Sister Sylva, took me under her wing.
‘It takes a particular kind of person to enjoy working here, which limits who applies and then is chosen,’ she said, looking smug.
I thought if she was the example, then the most likely type had a maniacal compulsion about tidiness and detail.
‘What do you think you might need to work here, Gaia?’ She arched both eyebrows.
I paused, rapidly reframing my thoughts. ‘Perhaps a clerk needs a very orderly mind?’ I ventured, in what I hoped was a sufficiently tentative tone.
‘Exactly!’ she beamed.’ And you need to be interested in the minutiae of how things are done. Well, of course, there are the Traders, who strut about being uninterested in such things,’ she sniffed, a habit of hers I was learning to dislike. ‘But we clerks are the ones who have to keep things running, by paying attention to the little details.’
The mention of Traders excited me. I had barely ever seen them in the Enclave. They seemed mysterious and remote, and probably did things I would find very interesting. As we made our way back into the Office, the elder sister nudged my arm.
‘There they are now,’ Sylva whispered, tilting her head towards me in what she seemed to think was a conspiratorial manner. It just made her look suspicious, and I pulled as far away from her as I politely could. Three tall strong women in black robes emerged from the Office of the Chief Mistress of Administration just in front of us. They looked wonderful—powerful, confident and self-possessed.
‘They think they are above everyone, just because they know how to fight, and travel outside the Enclave.’ She sniffed again.
Travel outside the Enclave? Fighting? I had heard nothing about these activities, and I was intrigued. Over the next few days, I began to ask occasional questions about the Traders, trying to be as subtle as possible. Eventually, Judine, one of the younger clerks asked me if I would like to meet one of the Traders.,
I was delighted. She called me into one of the private offices and introduced me to Mistress Panndra, who was much younger than I had expected, and very welcoming. She seemed vaguely familiar to me.
‘Excuse me, Mistress Panddra, but where would I have met you before?’
‘You attended your first Summer Festival last year?’ It was more a statement than a question.
When I nodded, she said ‘That’s where most women remember us from. We traders are the Protectors at Festival. Because of our travel outside the Enclave, we learn more about defending ourselves than most women do in the Perimeter Squad. During Festival we use those skills for the benefit of our sisters who may need some help with an unruly male. And,’ she added with a wry grin that took in my lowly two bands, ‘to keep youngsters away from the Field.’
‘Where do you learn to protect yourself?’
‘From the Temple. Did you not know about this before?’ I shook my head. She gave a soft laugh. ‘It’s not a secret. It’s just a physical practice that most people can’t be bothered to do regularly. Some of the sisters keep it up as a way of maintaining beautiful movement, but traders do it to keep their skills sharp. You can see if you wish.’ I beamed. ‘I teach a beginners class in the Small Reverencing Hall tonight. I do it on each Thirdday in the evening. Come along if you like.’
That evening I ran back to our room, bursting with news to share. Rosie was horrified to learn that sisters went ou
t of the Enclave. I was concerned that she seemed so shaken by it.
‘But they’re not safe!’ she exclaimed. I explained about the extra skills of defence, but she wasn’t reassured. ‘But I bet you are going to see what it’s like, aren’t you, Gaia?’ Her face was sour.
‘Of course I am. Why don’t you come too, and then you’ll see that it’s not so scary.’
‘It must be alright, Rosie. The Council of Mistresses and the Most must approve of this,’ Tomma said.
Rosie was still reluctant to accept that such risky practices were allowed. But Tomma was interested.
‘I miss my long walks out on the hills’ she sighed. ‘My arms are getting plenty of exercise hauling flour and kneading dough, but my legs aren’t, apart from our weekly Squad training. I’ll come with you to see what it’s like.’
As she and I walked to the Small Reverencing Hall after our evening meal, we talked about our new Houses. Tomma was enjoying being in the Bakery and looking forward to making some of the more elaborate pastries for special events. And she was still thinking about the boy from Festival.
‘I’ve only met up with him a few times since Festival, Gaia.’ We spoke softly. ‘I do want to see him again. It was such an amazing thing to compare how our different Enclaves work. I learned so much about their lives.’
I glanced at her curiously. ‘Is it really about that, or is it about him?’ I asked.
She blushed a little. ‘Well, yes, him too. I’ve only ever seen him at Festival, or very far away over the Wall.’ She smiled at her own thoughts before she looked up. ‘Do you still want to talk to him, Gaia? You were interested a while back’.
‘Oh, yes! I’d love to,’ I said. ‘I want to find out about trade, particularly in the Male Enclave.’
Now it was Tomma’s turn to look at me probingly. ‘Is it just about trade, Gaia, or is there something else about the Male Enclave that keeps you so interested?’
I felt surprised and shocked. What was she picking up about me?
‘No, of course not. It’s just like you said, being able to talk about how things are done there, so differently.’
She looked at me quizzically for a moment, and then nodded and walked on. I felt shaken. Everything about men and the Male Enclave left me feeling unsettled. And excited.
We entered the beginner’s class in the Small Hall and found about a dozen women standing around the room. Most had dropped their robes and were wearing very finely knitted long underwear. I had no idea such clothing was expected. I felt intensely uncomfortable; I didn’t want to reveal my body in such clinging wear. Nakedness was sometimes expected in our ceremonies, and it was common in the dormitories. I wasn’t prudish about other women’s bodies, but I didn’t like revealing my own when it wasn’t necessary. It didn’t feel right to me.
‘Come in! And welcome!’ called Sister Panndra. ‘If you have the long underclothes then wear them, it’s a bit easier to move. But if you haven’t, don’t worry. At this level it’s easy enough to do in a robe.’
She led the class, demonstrating postures and positions and long gliding movements between them, and gently guided and corrected our attempts to copy her. She was so poised; her balance on one leg looked effortless, even when she bent double. I wobbled and nearly fell. I could hear Tomma snorting with suppressed giggles behind me, which turned to a sudden squeal as she fell over. Coordination was never Tomma’s strong point.
The moves felt good, stretching muscles and requiring much more concentration than I had expected. But I couldn’t see how the slow graceful movements were related to protecting myself. After the class I asked Mistress Panndra about it.
‘It takes a lot of practice,’ she grinned. ‘But eventually, if you know how to do the moves correctly, and you speed them up a lot, they become ways you can push or pull an opponent off balance or strike them with your arm or foot. Watch,’ she said and suddenly spun, leant over and kicked towards my face. I flinched. She stopped with her foot just touching my chin. I froze and could hear Tomma’s startled intake of breath. She relaxed and stood up again.
‘So, do you think you would like to keep learning?’ I nodded, still speechless. ‘So, come each Thirdday evening. It counts as part of your Recreation time you know.’ I nodded again.
Tomma and I hurried out of the Hall. We talked over the moves as we walked back to our room. And how we could fit the classes into our Recreation. ‘I can go, instead of a run that day,’ I said. Tomma nodded, mulling over her options.
‘I really want to be able to move with such grace,’ I said. ‘But do you think we’ll have to get some of that fine long underwear?’
Tomma grinned. ‘I asked the woman next to me, and she said they are knitted out of silk. Says she loves them for winter, they’re really warm.’
‘But where do you get them?’
‘She said a friend of hers who works in the Spinners and Weavers knits them and sells them at our fairs. They’re expensive, so if you want them, you’ll have to save up your tokens. Will you?’ Tomma asked.
I made a non-committal noise. Tomma went prattling on, ‘I feel better now than I have since I last took the sheep out. Which reminds me, Gaia, what am I going to do about the boy?’
‘Let’s go together on our day off and have a picnic in the hills and see if he’s there.’
She started to skip. ‘Yes! Oh, yes, Gaia!’
‘But what are we going to do about Rosie? She surely won’t approve.’
That brought her to a halt. ‘Oh, Goddess, Gaia. What is happening with Rosie? She’s so irritable and ... sour, or something, these days.’
I nodded. ‘I think Winter Ceremony really upset her and she’s terrified about intercourse, after what happened, and it’s so bad that she doesn’t feel safe about anything, unless everything is done exactly by the rules.’
Tomma looked at me in surprise. ‘After what happened?’
I cursed myself. I’d sworn years ago I would never reveal Rosie’s secret. ‘What happened at Winter Ceremony,’ I covered up.
‘Oh, of course,’ Tomma said. ‘How do you always know these things, Gaia?’ She shook her head in exaggerated amazement.
‘I just look, and think, and wonder about how I would feel if it was me,’ I said.
Tomma grinned. ‘Just as well. If it was just up to me, I’d just keep trying to drag her out of it.’
I smiled too. ‘Not a very effective strategy with Rosie. We’ll just have to see if she’s got the same day off.’
When we got back the room, Rosie was out, and her week’s schedule was on the door beside ours. She didn’t have the same day off as we did. We made our plans without telling her and ordered a packed picnic lunch from the Acolytes Dining Hall for Fifthday next week.
Perimeter Squad Training
Gaia, Spring, Year Two, Initiates
BEFORE WE COULD GO for our picnic in the hills, we had to attend Perimeter Squad training after work on Fourthday. It was gradually becoming less of a trial. As spring progressed, the evenings were getting longer, and we were no longer shivering in the dark. And perhaps we were fitter and took it more seriously than when we had started. It always seems easier to put up with discomfort when you think it’s for a good cause.
We were told to gather at the sports ground, instead of in the learning rooms, and to wear our issued boots. I imagined we were going to have to slog around the ground with full packs like last year, or some similar form of torture to build up our endurance. We had been told last year to wear our boots often to break them in, but I had not had much cause to put them on. I groaned as I pulled at the stiff leather boots, and Tomma glanced at me.
‘I’m glad I wore mine all last year while I was out in the fields with the sheep. I think my feet must have grown to fit them, because they haven’t softened up.’ She grinned. ‘At least, I don’t get the weepy blisters I used to.’
I decided to wear a second pair of socks as insurance. I stomped down to the sports ground with Tomma, trying to brea
k in my boots in one short walk, and speculating about what form of boring torment the Perimeter Squad Mistresses would have in store for us.
‘At least we won’t have Mistress Allit this year. I heard they keep her with the first years, so she can terrify them all into submission,’ Tomma said.
‘Well, it worked on us, didn’t it?’ I said. ‘She certainly had me doing everything I could to avoid being noticed by her.’
Tomma looked at me in surprise. ‘You were terrified? I thought nothing ever scared you.’
I nodded, thinking about Mistress Allit. She was tiny—she only came up to my armpit—but she was so fierce and strong. She could do everything she instructed us to do without even getting out to breath. I had loved watching how she managed the obstacle courses even while carrying a full pack of supplies. Her body was so fit, and capable. She inspired me nearly as much as she scared me. I was about to answer Tomma, but we had arrived and the Mistresses were looking at us, so I stopped.
Out the front, Sisters Zenar and Polla were dressed in unusual garb. Instead of our usual ankle length robes, they wore short tops that stopped at hip level and leg covering garments we had only rarely seen. Both items were coloured in dull patches of grey, ugly brown and some splodges of off-green. We must have been staring, as Zenar stepped forward and rotated slowly in front of the group. There were a few indrawn breaths from the group and Zenar gave a hard half-smile.
‘These are called trousers. We wear them for Perimeter Squad work. Foresters also wear them. They give us great freedom of movement with protection for our skin when we are moving through the forest or brush. As you can imagine, they don’t get tangled and caught on vegetation as much as robes. You will all be issued with one pair of trousers now. You will wear them only when we are going out on training patrols. You have the usual responsibility for washing them and looking after them. Please go to the change rooms now and put on your new squad clothes.’