Shelter for Aylin

by Reina Torres

  Aylin took the phone from his fingers and added her contact information in and then sent herself a text. When her phone pinged in her bag, they heard a soft groan from the bed.”

  Wes shook his head. “I’ll get Sean and we’ll go back outside so you can study.” He stood and licked the pad of his thumb. “Love the peanut butter in it.”

  Smiling, she covered the box and set it on the desk. “Me too. Thanks, Wes. It really was nice meeting you. I’ll... I’ll look forward to a call from you so we can pick a time.”

  “A call?” His smile brightened. “Sure, that’s great. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  She nodded and watched as Wesley maneuvered a half-asleep Sean out of her room. It looked like he’d had experience dragging him out of rooms before. Sean wasn’t exactly the kind of friend she wanted to have, but Wes? She couldn’t help the smile that happened when she thought about him. He was a nice guy. Down to earth and genuine. She wasn’t sure what was going on with Still, except that it was a whole lot of nothing, so dinner would be nice.

  Right?

  Chapter 5

  Some days, the time between classes was barely enough for her to get from one building to another. She’d made sure to pack them in as closely as she could because she was still working part time for her mother’s catering jobs. The jobs were fun for her for the most part. She was used to the work and liked making the partygoers and customers happy. Her mother’s food made that easy. Everyone loved her food and Aylin was just so proud of her mother for the business that she built.

  It was also exciting for Aylin to continue working for her mom’s business while she was earning a degree that would be able to help her mom when she was done. It only cemented the bond they had and, if school went well, Aylin had plans to go on and get another degree. She just had to see how things went. It took all of her effort as it was to study and achieve the scores she had. And she was proud of what she was achieving, including the time she spent at the tutoring center. Numbers were her refuge and the assignments that needed those kinds of answers were a joy. It was the writing and reading that drove her to distraction.

  Literally.

  “What are you doing here?”

  Turning her head, Aylin saw Wesley’s friend standing beside her in a designer suit. “Hi! Sean, right?”

  “Yeah, right.” He lifted his glass to his lips and took a generous gulp of the amber liquid inside. Aylin knew at a glance that it was alcohol and knowing the hotel they were in that it was top shelf too. He set his glass down on one of the high-top tables and reached out to her tray.

  Aylin did what she’d always done in those moments, held out the tray for him to take whatever he wanted. He filled his hand with canapes and managed to grab one more with his fingertips and popped it into his mouth. He didn’t wait until he swallowed to speak. “Who did you have to piss off to get this kind of punishment?”

  She had to think for a moment before she answered. “This isn’t like some kind of work-study,” she laughed softly, “this is my job. My mom is the caterer for the event.”

  Sean almost choked on his second canape. “Seriously?”

  Aylin nodded. “Seriously. I’m working on my Accounting and Finance degree so I can help her with the business. Make it a real family thing.”

  “Sounds... interesting.”

  She heard the ‘shrug’ in his tone and figured he was like a lot of people that came to events like this. Used to saying things interested them without actually feeling it. It wasn’t just being nice... it was more of a cultivated personality thing that kind of gave her the creeps. It would just be easier to be nice. Discovering things about other people was fun, at least it felt that way to her.

  “I need to make the rounds. It was nice to see you again, Sean.”

  He shrugged and she wasn’t sure if he knew he’d done it. Picking up his glass, he downed the rest of the liquor and set it on her tray. “At least this time I got your attention.”

  When he walked away, she just stood there, looking between him and the empty glass on her tray. The hotel had bussers to take care of glassware, but she reasoned that he didn’t know that. But the voice in her head said that he probably didn’t care. Or maybe, like her roommate, Kat Jennings, he might enjoy putting her in her place. She had no doubts that they both saw her as beneath them, but that was their problem. They didn’t really know her.

  Straightening up her spine and lifting her chin, she moved off into the kitchen. She couldn’t in good conscience serve another canape off of the tray where he’d left his glass. It wouldn’t look good and probably wasn’t safe for the food. Once inside, she blinked to adjust her eyes to the bright fluorescent lights. It was so blaringly different from the softly lit ballroom of the hotel. She greeted some of the workers in the kitchen, easily remembering their names since they’d worked that same venue before.

  She quickly replated the canapes that were left and added more to that new tray. Austin, one of the kitchen helpers came over and took the old tray and the glassware from her. She thanked him and started to pick up the new tray when he touched her hand. “Hey, sorry. There’s a guy at the hallway door asking for you. I don’t know who he is, but he says he’s a friend who just wants to say hello. I can call security-”

  “No, no.” She looked at the clock in the kitchen and shook her head. “I’ll go and see what he wants. If my mom comes looking for me-”

  “I’ll tell her you’ll be right back.”

  She smiled at Austin. “Thanks. And I will. I’ll be right back.”

  When she pushed open the hall door, she stopped short. Craig Dennis was standing in the hallway. It was still hard to think of him immediately as ‘dad.’ As always, thinking of Craig, or the few times that she’d seen him, always brought up a whole wealth of awkward feelings. “What are you doing here?”

  He gestured at his suit as if that explained it.

  When she asked the question again. He answered.

  “I was here for the event, but when I saw your mom, I thought it was best that I leave. I don’t think that she’d want to see me here.”

  “I don’t want to see you here either.” She saw that her words had an effect on him, but what kind, she didn’t know. “If you don’t want my mom to see you, then why are you talking to me?”

  “You don’t have to tell her.” He smiled and she felt something cold crawl down her spine. “I bet you didn’t tell her about the coffee shop. Did you?”

  A knot formed in her throat. “I didn’t want to ruin her day. I don’t even know why you’d want me to tell her. She’s going to get angry about it and I don’t blame her. You’re dangerous.”

  A shadow fell over his features and for the first time, she thought that he was actually hurt. “I made some horrible decisions, Aylin.”

  “Don’t,” she put her foot down verbally. “Don’t you say my name. You don’t know me well enough.”

  “And I’m trying to fix that, baby. I’ve spent years listening to the wrong people. I kept thinking that I’d get to the point where I’d be the one making all of the decisions and when the fire happened...” he shook himself as if he was trying to rid his head of his thoughts. “When I forced myself to look at what happened and what almost happened to you, I realized that I had been so wrong. I never should have left the two of you.”

  “Why?” Aylin stepped into the hallway and let the door swing shut behind her. “What are you trying to accomplish here? I’m not interested in having you in my life. I know mom is way past that idea. She’s happy. Can’t you leave her alone?”

  “I’m not trying to change the past, Ay-” He stopped before he said her full name, giving her a hint that he might actually be listening to what she was saying. “And I’m not trying to get in the way of your mom being happy. You’re right. She’s past what we had and so am I. If she’s happy with her... her husband, then I’m happy for her. But I’m here to talk to you. You’re my daughter. And I know that I hurt you in the past. I know that I
’ve never been there for you before, but I’m trying to be different.

  “I’m trying to show you that I’ve changed. I’ve taken a good hard look at what I’ve done in the past. I’m not that man anymore.”

  “Okay, okay. Look, I have to get back to work. The same work that put food on our table when you refused to acknowledge us, okay? If you want to show me you’ve really changed then maybe you could suck it up and talk to my mom. Give her the apology she deserves. If I think you’re just trying to make an end run around my mom to see me, I’ll tell her that you’re being sneaky. That’s not going to get you anywhere with either of us.”

  “Okay!” He held up his hands in surrender and smiled. “You’re a tough young woman. You remind me of her when we met. Fire and determination. I heard what you had to say, but you need to know I’m not doing this to be sneaky. I’m afraid. I’ve missed out on so much and I just want to get to know you a little. I’m afraid if I talk to Viviana, she’ll tell you not to talk to me.”

  His words sobered her mood. “Well, if that’s what you’re afraid of, then you really don’t know my mother. She’s never wanted anything more than for me to be happy and safe. And I'm a big girl now. I’m a woman. And if I wanted to see you I would, but you’re going about this the wrong way. So, think about that.”

  The expression on his face changed. The awkward light in his eyes died and a new and strangely settled look appeared. “I get it. I do. I know that it’s going to be hard to for you to trust what I’m saying, but I’m going to work on that too. I ended my campaign after the fire. I know that what I did, the people I got involved with, took me down a long road that ended in ruin. That’s not where I saw my life going. So, I’m going to take a long hard look at my life and do what I can to make things better for you. I can’t make them right. It’s too late for that.”

  Aylin nodded slowly thinking through his words. It wasn’t just what he said but how he said them that really had an impact on her. “Okay. Thanks for saying that. I have to get back.”

  “Sure. Thanks for talking to me.”

  Once she laid her hand on the cool metal bar to open the door, she turned back to look at him. A question foremost in her mind. “My tuition. Did you… were you the one who paid it?”

  The smile he gave her was one of pride that held a note of humility in it. “Yeah, a little of my funds are tied up in my defense team, but I had enough and thought it would be something that you might appreciate.”

  She nodded. “Thanks. It was. I appreciate it.”

  “Goodnight.” He lifted a hand in farewell and disappeared out the side door at the end of the hall.

  “Goodnight,” she murmured to herself. There was so much going on, she really wanted to talk to someone. But it couldn’t be her mom or Ethan. Not yet. She just wasn’t sure if she could approach Still.

  But she wanted to.

  So much.

  When all was said and done, and the kitchen and venue cleaned and things put away, Aylin wasn’t ready to head back to her apartment and spending the night at the house with her mom and Ethan didn’t sound like what she wanted or needed. Walking out to the parking lot to her more-than-used-car, she knew she had to go somewhere and talk things out with someone who wasn’t directly involved.

  By the time she pulled into the parking lot and turned off the engine she smiled. Of course, she’d end up at Station Seven. Where else would she go to feel comfortable and safe in the middle of the night?

  Locking her car, she pocketed her keys and opened the door to the apparatus floor. She took a moment to breathe in the air of the silent room. Ladder truck, engine, crew truck and an ambulance. She sent up a little prayer of thanks that everyone on shift was safe and sound at the Station. How long that was going to last? She hoped all night.

  But the most amazing thing about the firefighters she knew is that they were ready for anything at any time. It was a privilege to know them and kind of daunting too. Going to school for finances where she’d sit at a computer and plug in numbers felt a little mundane when faced with their bravery and valor.

  “You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

  Smiling, she looked up at the open doors leading to the common room and dining area. “Hey, Chief.”

  When the big man opened up his arms for a hug, Aylin stepped right in. It felt like being enveloped by a mountain and being warmed by the sun. There was something so good and right about Chief as a person that made him a true man among men. When she stepped back, she felt his hand settle on her shoulder.

  “Come on in and sit with me for a while.”

  They made their way to the couch and he let her pick her seat first, even though it was always the same seat she took when she came in. The one closest to the door. So, it made her smile when he took his customary seat on the other side of the couch and looked at her as if he could see straight through to her heart.

  Feeling so open... transparent, she had to find something to talk about that was a kind of middle ground. She knew Chief wasn’t going to try to make her uncomfortable, but she’d spent most of her life insulated with her relationship with her mother in a kind of ‘us against the world’ feeling, that feeling ‘seen’ could be unnerving, no matter how good the viewer was.

  “You’re up late? Something happen before I got here?”

  Chief’s broad smile warmed her heart, and the way his gaze dipped down to the phone on the tabletop made her curious.

  “How are Sophie and the baby doing?”

  Before she’d even finished the question, Chief had the phone unlocked and his photo app open. “They are both amazing. Incredible. My dreams and my miracles in two perfect packages.”

  As Aylin took the camera, she toed off her shoes and brought her knees up to her chest, cradling the phone in her hands. “They are so beautiful!” She took her time looking through each photo. “I feel like it’s been forever since we saw you guys together.”

  “The baby’s growing so fast.” Chief’s voice was soft and filled with wonder. “When I’m home at night, I change diapers to give Sophie time to wake up for feedings. On the nights that I’m on shift I get up around the same time just by habit.”

  Aylin traced the chubby little cheek with her fingertip and sighed. “You’re a good man, Chief. A really good man.”

  “If the baby has a hard time going to sleep, Sophie’s going to call, and I’ll try to help them get settled.”

  Oh. Aylin started to stand, but Chief touched her arm.

  “Where are you going?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want to take your time when you’re wondering if Sophie’s going to call.”

  He pointed at the phone in her hand. “She hasn’t called yet. Until then, I’m sitting in the common room with a good friend, wondering how I can help her settle.”

  Aylin sighed and handed the phone back to him and then fiddled with her hands for a moment as she tried to form her thoughts into something coherent.

  It didn’t really work.

  So, she just went for the truth.

  “I’m struggling.”

  Chief didn’t say anything. He just continued to wait.

  “I know, big shock. Right?” She almost laughed outright but ended up with something that sounded more like a cough. “Me? Struggling. I struggled through classes. Struggled through making friends. Struggled all the way through to graduation.”

  “And how are you doing now? With your classes.”

  The question actually brought out a smile. “Actually, my classes are great! I’m doing mostly math and finance so it’s a lot of numbers. Numbers I can do. People? Relationships? Ha!”

  He nodded. “So, let’s focus on numbers.”

  She almost groaned in relief. “Numbers I can handle.”

  He set his phone on the couch cushion between them, still open to a photo of his beautiful family. She didn’t begrudge him that comfort. She often had her phone open on her desk with a picture of her at prom
with Still.

  “When did you discover your affinity with numbers?”

  Huh.

  She had to think about that.

  Leaning heavily against the back cushions of the couch, she gave it a long, searching thought. And for a minute she worried she didn’t even have an answer. But then that moment popped up in her head and left her with a broad smile.

  “My mom and I were shopping. Food was so expensive, and I knew, even as a little child that we didn’t have much. We bought the produce and vegetables from the discount tables but even I watched my mom make decisions about how to get the most of the money we had with us.

  “She was trying to figure out which deal was the best on a couple of sale items, and she was stuck. I watched her try to hide how frustrated she was. Her voice was thin, higher than normal. I felt like I wanted to cry for her, but knew that if I did, she’d just worry even more.”

  Aylin blew out a breath.

  “I didn’t have any money of my own. Even when I found coins in the parking lot or on the sidewalk, I’d give them to my mom. It felt like I was helping somehow.”

  “I’m sure she was grateful for your help.”

  Instinct made Aylin want to scoff at herself, but the way that Chief said the words made her feel good. His tone wasn’t joking. And he didn’t judge. Not that he would, but Aylin had a lifetime of people judging her as a reference, so it was hard to see things from a positive standpoint first.

  “As we stood there, I watched her go back and forth looking at one bottle and then the next, but the labels were right there in front of me. I looked at the numbers and remembered how my teacher had shown us simple fractions with cut up fruit. And believe me, a hungry kid pays attention when there’s fruit on the line.”

  Chief smiled and she felt his acceptance and his friendship.