Till Death Do Us Part

by Stephen Edger

  Ben’s late arrival had done little to ease her nerves.

  ‘You know what Ben and Dave are like when they get together,’ Tara said, as she sipped from her flute. ‘Thick as thieves since school. We should have expected them to find a pub before the ceremony. And in fairness we did arrive early at the church.’

  Alice nodded. Ben had been the only variable to the day that she hadn’t been able to totally organize. Once they were all at the church, she felt more certain that events would run like clockwork. The ceremony was due to start at half twelve, and be finished by one, at which point they would congregate for confetti and photographs, before Alice and Ben were whisked to the hotel ready to greet their guests upon arrival. The champagne reception would run until two, followed by the professional photographs in the grounds of the hotel, with the wedding breakfast formally commencing at three. Food would be followed by speeches, before a break at five, with everyone returning for the evening party from six. They’d decided to cut the cake prior to the first dance, so that as many of their friends and family would be there to witness it.

  ‘Cheer up, Faye,’ Tara said suddenly to the second bridesmaid, who’d been squashed up on the seat next to her in silence. ‘You want some more bubbles?’

  Faye shook her head and continued to stare out of the window. She’d been another variable Alice had been unable to predict. Faye was married to Johnny, another of Ben’s good friends, and the two women had hit it off instantly when Ben had first introduced them four years ago. Faye wasn’t the same person now though. Once bubbly and wildly outgoing, she was barely a shell of the woman from years ago, though Alice couldn’t put her finger on exactly what had changed or when.

  Alice shuffled along her seat, so she was directly across from Faye. ‘Hey, you. Is everything okay? You’ve been so quiet today.’

  Faye’s eyes were wet as she fixed Alice with a troubled stare. ‘I’m fine. I’m sorry, just got one or two things on my mind. I don’t want to spoil your big day.’

  ‘You’re not spoiling anything, I just don’t like to see you looking so down. Is there anything I can do? Is it Isabella?’

  Faye’s eyes widened at the sound of her daughter’s name. ‘No, Isabella’s fine. I told you, she’s with my mum today.’

  ‘What is it then? I’m worried about you.’

  Faye plastered a smile across her face. ‘I’m okay. Really.’

  Alice frowned at her. ‘Okay, but the two of us are going to have a proper catch-up when Ben and I get back from the honeymoon. Agreed?’

  Faye’s smile widened. ‘I’d like that. Sorry again.’

  ‘More bubbles is what we all need,’ Tara said, filling all of their glasses. ‘I think we should also toast the most gorgeous bride and the best looking bridesmaids the world has ever seen.’

  ‘I’ll second that,’ Alice said, clinking her flute against theirs.

  ‘It really was a smart move if you ask me,’ Tara continued. ‘Picking two chubby bridesmaids, so we don’t show you up in the photos.’

  Alice gasped in shock. ‘That isn’t why I picked the two of you!’

  Tara chuckled to show she hadn’t meant any offence. ‘Don’t worry, I intend to do the same thing if some bloke is ever stupid enough to fall on one knee for me, but in my case the bridesmaids will have to be real heifers so as to make me look like the slim one. That probably rules the two of you out as future bridesmaids, so I’ll apologize in advance.’

  The Rolls Royce returned to the outside of the church two minutes ahead of deadline. Scott was still waiting on the kerb where they’d left him, and he raised two thumbs to confirm everyone was inside and waiting.

  ‘Are you ready for this?’ Tara asked.

  Alice took a deep breath, before lowering her veil. ‘Ready as I’ll ever be.’

  As the three women emerged from the car and made their way to the church doors, the feeling of dread continued to bubble just beneath the surface of Alice’s skin.

  TWO

  ‘You look amazing,’ Ben whispered as he leaned in and kissed her cheek. ‘I feel like the luckiest guy alive.’

  Alice brushed her hand against his smooth cheek. ‘I’m the lucky one. I’m glad you took my advice and had a shave this morning too.’

  It was just the two of them, now, in the back of the Rolls Royce, heading away from the church and starting their first journey as husband and wife. Ben’s parents, Alice’s mum, Scott, and the bridesmaids would follow behind in two further Phantoms hired for the day. Everyone else had directions to the hotel and would make their own way there.

  ‘I was convinced I would fluff my lines,’ Ben said, leaning back and interlocking his fingers with hers. ‘My throat was so dry up there, and even though the vicar was prompting us with what to say, I was sure I’d say the wrong thing.’

  ‘It went by in a blur, didn’t it? I’m so glad we hired someone to film it. My memory of it is already fading, and I want to hear us exchange vows again.’

  ‘We could always do a do-over,’ Ben teased. ‘We could phone for an annulment and head back there now.’

  She pressed her head into his arm. ‘Don’t think you’re going to be able to get away from me that easily. You’re mine for keeps now, and it will take someone far stronger than you to break us.’

  He kissed the top of her head. ‘Nothing will break us, I promise. I have a really great feeling about our future.’

  ‘I worry about Tara though. She’s obviously still really down about Jack breaking up with her. She was so sure he was going to pop the question, until he ditched her last week. It must be tough for her seeing how happy we are.’

  ‘She’ll be fine. The way I look at it, she’s your best mate, and she’ll be happy to share in our joy today.’

  ‘She’s so self-conscious about her size though. I think she’s beautiful, but she doesn’t see it. All she focuses on is her larger dress size.’ Alice adjusted the front of her own dress as it squeezed her middle.

  ‘You want me to have a word with Dave?’

  Alice raised her head with a confused look. ‘What do you mean?’

  Ben raised his eyebrows. ‘I could ask him if he’d … you know … size doesn’t bother him.’

  Alice slapped his arm. ‘She doesn’t need us fixing her up with a sympathy shag, especially with someone like Dave.’

  Alice hadn’t meant to be so blunt, but could see the hurt look in Ben’s eyes.

  ‘What’s wrong with Dave? He’s sound as a pound.’

  Alice wrinkled her nose. ‘I know he’s your best friend, but he isn’t always … I just mean, I don’t want Tara to settle.’

  ‘He’s like a brother to me, and she could do a lot worse than Dave.’

  ‘I know, I know … listen, I don’t want to fall out over something so silly. I just think they’re too different. Tara is passionate about teaching, and she yearns to meet someone who will sweep her off her feet. Even you have to admit, Dave is no romantic lothario, is he?’

  Ben shrugged begrudgingly. ‘I guess not. Didn’t stop you going out with him back in the day though, did it?’ He was grinning at her as he spoke, and she playfully slapped his arm again.

  ‘That was a long time ago, and it was a blind date. Besides, if I hadn’t met up with him that night, you never would have met me, and we wouldn’t be here now.’

  ‘He has a thing for schoolteachers, too, though I doubt he’ll ever find one as gorgeous as you.’

  ‘It’s not easy for her to meet new guys. If you think about it, the only men we tend to come into contact with are either teachers or parents. Not exactly a plentiful pool.’

  ‘Ha! You think it’s easier running a logistics company? Most of my clients are middle‑aged men with less hair than Dave!’

  She smiled coquettishly. ‘Well, you don’t need to worry about that any more. God help you if I ever catch your eye wandering, Mr Goodman. As an experienced junior schoolteacher, I’m very handy with a pair of scissors.’ She made a point of staring at his
crotch as she spoke.

  He pressed his hands against her cheeks and pulled her in for a deep and meaningful kiss, sending tremors along her arms and legs.

  ‘I do believe we just had our first argument as husband and wife. Should I ask the chauffeur to pull over so we can have make-up sex?’

  Alice couldn’t be sure if he was being serious or just teasing her again. His ability to make her laugh was what had first attracted her to him. Conventionally handsome, with dark hair and a brooding look that he could flip to at the drop of a hat, physically Ben was a fine specimen. Dave on the other hand had a large frame, with deep-set eyes and a rapidly decreasing hairline. The two had the ability to wind each other up, but when push came to shove, there was nothing one wouldn’t do for the other.

  ‘Make-up sex will have to wait until tonight, I’m afraid,’ she said, kissing him back. ‘I don’t want to do anything to mess up my hair before the photographs.’

  He pressed the back of her hand to his lips. ‘Fair enough. Hey do you reckon our parents are behaving in the other car?’

  Ben’s parents were staunch Christians who attended mass without fail every Sunday. Ben had once told her a story about how his mother had strapped a pair of tennis rackets to her feet so she could plough through a foot of snow to make it to the service. Alice’s mum on the other hand was far less religious, and rarely hid her opinions on outdated religious practices. It had been stressful having to break the news to her that they’d decided to get married in a church, especially given that neither Ben nor Alice were regular church attendees.

  ‘Hopefully they’re sitting in silence and enjoying the view,’ Alice said. ‘If Scott is with them, I’m sure he’ll make sure Mum bites her tongue.’

  ‘Hey, you could always set up Tara with Scott.’

  Alice scrunched up her face. ‘I love my stepbrother and I love Tara, but I cannot see what they would have in common. Besides, Scott’s married to his cycling career. He’s never around long enough to maintain a relationship. When he’s back in Southampton he seems to spend all of his free time at the gym anyway.’

  ‘Yeah but he probably only does that so he isn’t trapped under the same roof as your mum. It amazes me that they still live together after all this time.’

  ‘It’s good for her having him around, even if that’s less and less these days. For him it offers a roof over his head when he’s in the city, and somewhere he can store all his stuff.’

  ‘I’m pretty sure I saw him crying when the vicar asked him to give you away. He definitely wiped something from the corner of his eye.’

  ‘Yeah? I’m pretty sure I saw Dave do the same thing when he realized he was giving you up.’

  She chuckled at her own quip, but the joy was short-lived when she remembered they had yet to hear Dave’s best man speech. Dave wasn’t known for his tact, and although Alice had begged and pleaded with him to show her the final version, he’d refused. She’d insisted though that he keep it clean for the sake of Ben’s parents as well as her own feelings.

  She accepted that she didn’t know everything from Ben’s past, and although the two of them had done the thing where they’d shared the names of previous partners, it hadn’t been something either had wanted to dwell on. It grated that Dave was privy to so much of Ben’s life prior to her arriving on the scene, and she now desperately hoped he wouldn’t parade all of the skeletons from Ben’s closet in front of her friends and family.

  The first road sign for the hotel appeared ahead. Old Mill Lodge, on the edge of Hampshire’s New Forest, was a grand-looking building, so named because it was built on the site of a mill that had operated in the late nineteenth century. When the business had failed, an eccentric developer had bought the land with a view to building the finest mansion the area had seen; but a year after completion he had suffered a heart attack and the deeds had passed to his unscrupulous son, who had immediately sold it. Shortly after the Second World War, it had been turned into a fine manor hotel where wedding costs started from thirty thousand upwards.

  ‘You’ve gone quiet,’ Ben observed. ‘Are you okay?’

  Pushing the fear from her mind, she snuggled into his shoulder contentedly. ‘With you by my side, I have everything I’ll ever need.’

  THREE

  ‘I promised I’d go easy on him,’ Dave said, his large arm brushing against Alice’s shoulder as he reached for the bottle of wine on the table between them. His jacket was now slung over the back of the chair, and he looked more like himself.

  ‘Thank you,’ Alice replied over the loud music already pumping out of the room next to them, grateful that Dave’s ribbing of Ben throughout the best man’s speech had been gentle. ‘It was a good speech.’

  ‘You should hear the first draft,’ he teased, a wide grin breaking across the stubble on his cheeks. ‘I should let you read a copy of it, so you get to see the man you’ve really married.’

  She gave him a cursory stare, but found her own lips reflecting his smile. ‘I wonder what sort of speech Ben would write about you though, Dave.’

  His expression changed to one of mock hurt. ‘Moi? Didn’t you know? I’m an angel. They broke the mould when they made me. Scout’s honour.’

  Alice doubted very much that Dave had ever been in the Scouts. No matter how hard she tried to picture him in shorts and a woggle, she just couldn’t do it.

  Now that the speeches were complete, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She’d even caught both of Ben’s parents chuckling as Dave had relayed stories of how the two of them had met, how Dave viewed himself as something of a Cupid for helping the happy couple connect, and had avoided all references to previous partners.

  Dave’s hands had trembled as he’d read out his speech, but Ben had looked even more nervous, sipping his wine every sixty seconds or so, clearly dreading the potential grenades Dave could have dropped.

  The hotel staff had kicked them out of the room just after five, as Dave’s speech had dragged on a little longer than expected, and Alice had taken the opportunity to change into her evening gown and freshen up. The honeymoon suite was everything she had hoped for. High ceilings, a four-poster bed and a balcony with a view of the lake and luscious green lawn where the photography session had taken place. Picture-perfect didn’t come close to describing it, but then she’d left nothing to chance, and had spent the majority of her free time in the last two years planning every minute detail. From the embossed ‘Save the Date’ cards, to the individual handheld dessert selection that had been served during the speeches, she had overseen every detail.

  Today was her day, and nothing was going to spoil it.

  She hadn’t seen Ben since the breakfast, but Dave had found her and promised the rest of the lads were looking after him, which probably meant they were drinking and exchanging banter where they couldn’t be overheard. The evening guests were now gathering in the suite ready for the evening disco and buffet, awaiting the newlyweds’ arrival and the cutting of the cake.

  ‘Are you having a good day?’ Dave asked, leaning closer again.

  ‘The best,’ she gushed.

  ‘I’m sorry I was late getting Ben to the church,’ he continued sombrely. ‘It’s absolutely my fault, and you shouldn’t blame him. It took us ages to find an open pub. The one I’d planned for us to go to was closed, and we had to drive around until we found one. Ben kept saying we should just forget about it, but I wanted him to have a proper send-off. I hope you can forgive me. The last thing I’d want is to spoil your big day.’

  She patted his arm warmly. ‘It’s okay, Dave. No harm done.’

  A sudden crash into the table was followed by a hand resting on Dave’s shoulder.

  ‘Hey mate,’ the owner of the hand slurred. ‘You got a cigarette I can steal?’

  Dave looked annoyed at the interruption, but turned to face the man. ‘You don’t smoke, Abdul.’

  ‘Yeah, but I like one every now and again, when I’ve been drinking. Go on,
don’t be tight.’

  Dave shuffled the chair back and stood, reaching for the suit jacket draped over the arm. ‘Sure, I’ll come out and join you.’ He paused and turned back to Alice. ‘Have you two met? Alice, this is Abdul. Abdul, this is Ben’s better half.’

  Alice hadn’t met Abdul before, but she’d heard Ben and Dave talking about him. From India originally, he had met the other two at university and they’d spent most of their time high as kites, before going their separate ways at graduation.

  ‘Hi,’ Alice waved.

  ‘Great day,’ Abdul replied. ‘Appreciate the invite.’

  ‘I’ll see you in a bit.’ Dave winked at Alice, before following Abdul away from the table and towards the hotel lobby.

  A moment later, Alice’s mother plonked down in the chair Dave had vacated.

  ‘You’re supposed to be waiting for us in the hall, Mum,’ Alice said patiently.

  ‘Your dads would be so proud of you right now,’ her mum replied, her eyes welling instantly. ‘It’s been a lovely day so far.’

  It had taken enough planning, but it felt good to have all that effort vindicated by someone who could be so judgemental.

  ‘Thank you, Mum. Are you okay?’

  Her mum removed a tissue from the sleeve of her violet cardigan and dabbed the corner of her eyes. ‘I’m hanging in there. I wish both your dads could have been here to see you walk down the aisle. You looked like a princess from one of those stories we used to read to you as a child.’

  Alice could feel the sting of tears and took a moment to compose herself. ‘Stop it, Mum, you’ll set me off.’

  Her mum hugged her tightly. ‘I’m so proud of all you’ve achieved, Alice. I wanted you to know that.’

  Alice eyed the large glass of wine tentatively poised in her mum’s hand; she always became more emotional under the influence.

  ‘Well I’m so glad I have you here to celebrate with,’ Alice said, squeezing her back.

  She saw Ben stumbling towards the table before she heard him. ‘Here are my two favourite ladies,’ he said, planting a kiss on Alice’s lips.