Hard to Forgive (Hard to Love Book 3)

by L. M. Reid

  Knowing he was at the club, I knew that I couldn’t stay there a minute longer. So I headed for the door only to find him kissing another woman while his eyes were focused on me. His actions were intentional. Either he was trying to prove a point or hurt me, whichever one it was, it was cruel. I felt sick seeing him with her, seeing the contempt in his eyes. I feel like such a fool.

  The real mistake was worrying about Cooper, letting him factor into my decision making at all. I let his words dictate me before, let them hurt me and influence my decisions. Not again. No, it was clear that Cooper was over me and whatever it was that we were to each other. I should be too.

  In that instant, my decision was made. I am not letting my dream job slip away from me. Not for him, not for anyone. I am the new manager of The Onyx Hotel and Spa and Cooper, well, he’ll just have to deal with that. Relieved that I had finally made a decision, I opted to allow the emotions from the evening to wash over me. I allow myself one final night of misery suffered at the hands of Cooper Williams before I officially write him out of my life.

  ***

  Today is a brand-new day. One filled with promise and hope and nothing but a memory of a man who doesn’t deserve me.

  Today, I make my dreams come true.

  One final glance in the mirror, then I make my way down to the Waldorf’s restaurant where I was supposed to meet Kassie ten minutes ago. I’m fairly certain that she’s cussing me out underneath her breath despite the poised appearance she is giving off at the moment.

  “Hey, there you are. I was starting to get worried,” Kassie says as I join her at the table. “Feeling better?”

  “Huh?” I ask as I take a seat across from her.

  Immediately, I curse at myself under my breath. The lie I told her last night to allow a clean escape from the club long forgotten – until now.

  “That’s what I thought,” Kassie says strumming her fingers on her coffee club. “Want to tell me what happened last night?”

  The truth is I don’t. The last thing I want to do is relive the second worst night of my life.

  Sinking down into the chair, I sigh. “I uh… I ran into Cooper.”

  Her eyes widen and she smiles. She’s expecting to hear a tale of love rekindled or in the least Cooper and I screwing each other’s brains out, neither of which even came close to happening.

  “Oh Mia,” Kassie says softly as I recount the events of the previous night to her. The events that actually transpired versus what she had hoped had happened.

  “Don’t. It’s fine. At least it’s over and now….”

  “Now what?” Kassie asks curiously.

  “Now, we can avoid each other.”

  Silence. Kassie continues to stare at me, “What does that mean?”

  It’s finally time to break the news to her. Time to tell her the real reason I’m in town as opposed to the semi-truthful reason I gave her initially.

  “That means that I am going to take the job Mitchell offered me yesterday and run the Onyx,” I say with a smile. Saying the words out loud makes them feel even more real – and more right.

  “Oh my God. Are you serious?” She leaps from her seat and throws her arms around me. “This is the best news.”

  “Sit down,” I laugh. “You’re making a scene.”

  Kassie rolls her eyes at me before finally reigning herself in and sitting down. She immediately begins scrolling on her phone.

  “What are you doing?” I ask.

  “A friend of mine and by friend, I mean…”

  “I know what you mean.”

  Waving her hand at me she continues. “Anyway, he is listing the most amazing apartment today.” She begins to tap something out on her phone. Almost instantly she gets a reply. “And now, you get to be the first to see it.” She has a huge smile on my face and I’m not sure if it’s because of the apartment or the guy that’s going to be showing it to us. I pop a grape into my mouth as I watch her continue to work on her phone. “This one,” she says as she pushes the phone toward me. “It is perfect for you. Great location and close proximity to two of the best things in this town – me and the Onyx.”

  The photo alone is enough to make me want to say yes.

  “Mitchell will be here soon. Once I officially accept the offer, we can go look at it.”

  With the hotel slated to open in six weeks, the sooner I find a place to live the happier I will be. Even if I’m practically going to be living at the hotel, I hate feeling unsettled. It would just be another thing hanging over my head stressing me out. Luckily from the looks of the picture she’s showing me, chances are I’ll have an apartment today.

  My phone illuminates a message from Mitchell on the screen. “He’s here, I’ll be right back.”

  “Go, accept your dream job. I’ll wait here,” she says sitting back in the chair and enjoying the lavish surroundings. “Oh, and tell him I say hi.”

  The wiggle of her eyebrows as she says it makes me think saying hi to Mitchell for her is more than likely means thanks for a great time last night. Either way, I am not mentioning her or her hello. When I see him waving at me from the front door of the hotel, I hurry in his direction.

  “There’s my favorite girl,” he says pressing a kiss to my cheek. “So?”

  “So,” I say trying to play coy with him. As much as I want to scream out that I accept his offer, I also like making him sweat a little. After everything he put me through over the years, the late nights, the extra hours, the extra work with no extra pay, he deserves this. Yes, of course, everything he did was to get me to this position, and I am more than grateful for the opportunity he is giving me. But Mitchell is so self-assured all the time that watching him suffer a little bit makes all of this just a little bit sweeter.

  “You’re killing me, Mia,” he groans.

  “I just wanted to thank you for last night. The party was…”

  “Mia,” he shouts. His loud boisterous voice has people looking at us immediately.

  “Shh,” I say with a laugh. “The answer is yes, Mitchell. I accept the job.”

  You would think I accepted his proposal rather than a job offer the way he picks me up and swings me around. “This is amazing,” he says. “You’ve made me the happiest boss ever.”

  “I won’t let you down, Mitchell.”

  He laughs. “I know. That’s why I offered you the job. You’re the only one I trust with this place. You, Mia, are going to make it a success.”

  He ushers me over to a table and pulls out the contract. I sit down before taking the pen from his hand. One little signature and all my dreams will come true. One stroke of the pen and there is no turning back. The pen hovers over the paper as I take it all in.

  “Mia?” He says my name as a question – one wondering if I changed my mind.

  I drop the pen to the paper and sign my name in response. Placing the pen on the table, I look up at him. “Thank you, Mitchell.”

  “No need to thank me, this is all you. Go. Enjoy your last day of freedom. Tomorrow, we get to work.” He rushes off to yet another meeting. Something about a chef that he is backing that is going to open a restaurant in the hotel.

  “Ready to go?” Kassie asks as she approaches me. “I just talked to the listing agent; I told him we could be there in ten.”

  My arm loops through hers, “Ready. Let’s go get me an apartment.”

  Ten minutes. That’s all it takes for my world to come full circle. First my dream job, now my dream home.

  “So? What do you think?” Greg the listing agent asks as I step out onto the balcony.

  Looking at him, it makes sense now why Kassie hooked up with him. He’s a good-looking guy – tall, sexy, bright green eyes. Even more, he is clearly into Kassie while I get the feeling, she’s more into only a specific piece of him.

  As for his question? “What do I say? It’s beautiful and the view…” I look out onto the Onyx standing there in all its glory. When Kassie mentioned that the apartment was in close prox
imity to the Onyx, I never imagined she meant like this. Looking from my balcony I have a clear view of it from less than two blocks away. “The view is everything.”

  Greg doesn’t seem to be paying me much attention, his attention focused on Kassie.

  I breeze past him glancing around, trying to picture myself here, see if I feel at home. Out of all the places I have lived, I have never really felt “at home.” This time, I want that. I need it. More importantly, I deserve it. Maybe I am all that I have, my own little singular family, but I deserve a good home and I worked damn hard to get one.

  Running my fingers along the black quartz of the kitchen counters, I stop and turn to Greg. “I’ll take it.”

  I’m not sure if hears me or not because he doesn’t react until he hears Kassie squeal. “This is so exciting.”

  As happy as I should be for myself, I can’t help but notice the way that Greg is looking at Kassie and wishing that I had someone looking at me like that. Who am I kidding; I wish Cooper would look at me like that.

  “Ya know, Kass, I think Greg likes you,” I tell her.

  “After what we did, he better like me.” Her blasé comment tells me all I need to know.

  “Oh my God, you like him.”

  “I do not. Besides, even if I did, I don’t have time for a relationship right now. I have my career and my best friend, who just so happens to have a smoking hot boss.”

  Greg clears his throat before he walks into the room. Poor guy. No one wants to hear someone they like call another person hot. I should know. I used to do it all the time to get a rise out of Cooper. Though, the rise it usually got me was nothing but pleasure. The man definitely had no problem proving himself to me. If only he could have loved me.

  “Okay, here we go,” Greg says when he returns. “I just need you to sign a few papers and write me out the deposit and you’re good to go.”

  This time, I am the one squealing. All the pieces are coming together – the job, the apartment, even the run in with Cooper. The more I think about it, it was more of a blessing than a curse. It gave me closure. Not exactly what I hoped for but, it was better than nothing. I can move on. I can make a fresh start here in Dayton.

  I turn on my heel and grab the papers from Greg. For the second time today, I sign on the dotted line.

  Closing the door on my past, I open the door to my future.

  9

  Cooper

  It’s been three days since I saw Mia and my head is still fucked up.

  Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected to run into her of all people at Lust that night. Since that moment, she’s been consuming every single one of my thoughts. She’s taking up space in my mind that should be dedicated to my new restaurant endeavor. Something that I sure as hell should be focusing on that rather than her body and how fucking good she tasted, even after all these years.

  I sit back in my desk chair and allow my mind wander back to the first time I ever laid eyes on her…

  Leaning back in the bed, my head resting against the headboard, I groan. My head is pounding from trying to figure out this bullshit for my accounting class. It’s all just a big mess of numbers to me. The loud music booming through the paper-thin walls sure as hell isn’t helping any.

  Shoving my hands into the mattress I push off the bed and storm over to the room next door. The music gets immensely louder the minute that I enter the hallway. For the past year, the room had been empty and now there’s some asshole living in it who thinks he can do whatever the fuck he wants.

  I pound on the door trying to outdo the sounds of the bass.

  When the door opens, every demand that I wanted to yell at the asshole is lost on my tongue. My voice is gone. My body is frozen, and my dick is standing at full attention.

  This isn’t just some asshole.

  This is a fucking sexy angel sent down from heaven.

  The only part of me that’s able to move, my eyes, run up and down her body. Rolling Stones tee shirt that barely hits the top of her thighs and the tiniest strap of red satin underneath it. Her long tan legs look like they would wrap around me perfectly.

  When my eyes finally make my way back up to her face, she’s smiling at me. Her black hair is piled high on her head and her smile makes my breath hitch. There’s a bit of wild to it, a little trouble, and whole lot of sexy.

  This is the asshole that’s blaring music at eleven thirty on a Tuesday night?

  “Hey,” she says, or at least I think she does because I can barely hear her over the music. “Shit, sorry.” She turns and reaches to grab something showing me even more of the red satin that covers her perfect ass. “Sorry about that.”

  “It’s fine,” I reply.

  “No, it’s not. It was too loud. I just got lost in what I was doing and… Ugh, no excuses. I’m sorry. I’m Mia, by the way.”

  “I’m Cooper. And, really, it’s fine. I normally wouldn’t care I just have an exam tomorrow and I’m struggling.”

  “What kind of exam?”

  “Accounting,” I grumble, the idea of the stupid class infuriating me enough at just speaking the words.

  “Not to brag, but I’m kind of amazing with numbers. I could help.”

  Her words feel like a trap. Like they are some sort of cosmic tease to see if I will give in to the beautiful woman or actually do what I am supposed to – study. She is offering to help. It would be rude to turn her down, right?

  She leans against the door jamb as I contemplate her offer. My mind is having a hard time concentrating when all I can see are her legs and the sexy undergarments that are covering the one thing that I am certain I want.

  “Oh geeze,” she says as she grabs my hand and pulls me into her room. “Who do you have?”

  “Uh...” I fumble for my professor’s name as my brain is thinking about nothing but her and sex at this point. “Falk. Professor Falk.”

  “I had him last semester,” she tells me. “He’s tough, but fair.”

  I hold back a groan as I watch her bend before me to get something off a bookshelf. She holds up a book, one that mirrors the one that I was just reading in my own dorm room. As she flips open the book, each sidebar of each page is filled with notes. She settles onto the bed, the open book in her lap, and looks up at me expectantly. I’m not sure what she’s expecting so I just stand there like a fucking idiot and look back at her. Mia pats the space next to her on the bed.

  I am about to get into bed with a woman. Of all the things I could be doing, I’m going to study?

  I shake my head, completely dumbfounded by the whole idea before I sit next to her. I should be focusing on the material. Instead I watch her mouth as she speaks lips that are so goddamn kissable. Her legs are stretched out on the bed and crossed at the ankle. And I’ll be damned if she is still wearing nothing more than a tee shirt.

  “Focus, Cooper,” she says sternly, but there is a smile on her face.

  “Sorry,” I lie as I smile sheepishly at her.

  Any ounce of cool or confident that I think I am is lost on this girl. No, I have been openly gawking at her since she opened the door and I don’t even feel bad about it. Messy bun, no make-up and she has my body standing at attention.

  At some point, what she’s saying actually starts to make sense. Well, sort of. I still fucking hate numbers. But after making me recap everything we went over for the tenth, time, she claps her hands with enthusiasm. “I think you’ve got it.”

  “Thanks to you. What can I do to repay the favor?” I know what I want to do. I’m fairly sure that she isn’t thinking the same thing though. There were a few times where she would touch me or nudge me while we were studying. Maybe she was just being subtle? Maybe it was all just a ruse?

  I start to get a little excited about the idea. Fucking this girl would be the perfect end to tonight, just what I need to help me get some good sleep before the exam.

  Her manicured finger taps on her chin thoughtfully and I say a silent prayer that we’re on the
same page. “Breakfast?”

  “Now?” I ask glancing down at my watch. It’s just after two in the morning.

  “Why not? I can quiz you a little more and make sure you’ve got it. Plus, I’m starving.” She moves from the bed and pulls on a denim skirt. “So, are you coming or not?”

  I stand from the bed. “Where do you want to go?”

  Yep, that was definitely not what I was supposed to say. The way she looks at me though, it’s fucking worth it.

  So, rather than sleeping, I walk through the dark campus straight to Aunt Sally’s, the twenty-four-hour diner just off campus. I slide into the booth across from her and watch her as she studies the menu. I haven’t been able to take my eye off her since she opened her door. Sure, she’s beautiful, but there’s just something more to her that has me intrigued. I find myself looking at her in ways I don’t typically look at a woman, ways that are more than just about sex. Not that I’m not still thinking about sex with her, but there’s just something more. Like I want to get to know her, talk to her – things I don’t normally give a shit about.

  “So, tell me about yourself Mia?”

  “I’m Mia Beckett, I’m twenty-one, and I’m majoring in Hotel and Tourism Management.”

  “Well, Mia Beckett, I am Cooper Williams, I’m twenty-two and I am majoring in Business. But I plan on going to culinary school once I graduate.”

  “Culinary school, huh? Then why are we eating here when you should be cooking for me?”

  The rest of our meal pretty much goes the same way. Witty banter mixed in with getting to know each other. Mia is hands down the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.