White (The Wings Trilogy Book 1)

by Angelina J. Steffort

  Chris’ eyes went wide.

  “Why did he fall? He didn’t jump, I know that much.” His hands clutched into fists. “And what the hell were you two up on that roof for?”

  I remembered the last steps on the stairs to the door that had led directly onto the roof.

  “How we got there? That’s easy—the elevator was broken and took us up instead of down, and then we were stuck up there. I wanted to take the emergency exit and climb down the fire escape. We went up the stairs to the emergency exit and ended up on the roof. Adam was following me. I heard his steps behind me. As I opened the door, Adam squeezed past me, pushing me back. He told me to stay there and hide. I didn’t understand at once, but when I heard the voices from the roof I knew we both shouldn’t be here. Wrong time wrong place maybe—

  “The problem wasn’t that we had heard them, but that they had heard him and seen him. He was too slow getting back inside, but they hadn’t taken notice of me, so Adam stepped out onto the roof, trying to make light conversation—something impossible with villains. They teased Adam a bit until they got tired of the game. They hit him and punched him and finally pushed him—” I was close to tears again, hoping that my lie would suffice. I wasn’t able to come up with something more plausible so fast. I knew that he would ask about who they were and I would have to come up with more lies to backup my own alibi. “—they just pushed him towards the edge,” I whispered, unbearable pain welling up in my heart, “and then they turned away and vanished.” I cut the part of Adam spreading wings.

  “Adam was standing too close to the edge of the roof—he stumbled and fell backwards.” I wasn’t sure I could get out another word.

  “The police didn’t find any proof of physical violence. They are sure it was suicide.” His eyes were red with sadness. For some reason he seemed to believe me.

  I nodded. His eyes locked mine in place again with piercing intensity. “They heal fast, angels, you know, there wouldn’t be any wounds or bruises left to give away that somebody hit him.”

  I didn’t believe what I had just heard. Angels. I held my breath. Chris knew.

  “And you are sure he didn’t spread his wings while he was falling?” Chris asked with a serious voice.

  My thoughts still sped through my head without following a concrete direction, but Chris’ words made me look up. How did he know?

  The room suddenly seemed unnaturally hot. Everything I had thought a secret turned out to be common knowledge.

  I needed to get out. I got to my feet and wanted to storm from the room, but Chris was faster, he caught my arm before I reached the door.

  “This is important, Claire.” He forced me to look at him with one hand, the other holding me in an iron grasp. “Did Adam ever tell you what he was? Did he show you?”

  I let my shoulders hunch in resignation and nodded, letting myself sink back into the armchair.

  Chris’ expression was impossible to read. It looked a bit like relief, a bit like betrayal.

  I had thought Adam hadn’t told anyone—I had thought I was the only one to know what he is.—What he was, a voice in my head corrected me. Until now I had thought it was a secret. I hadn’t expected anyone else to know. So Chris took me by surprise with his knowledge and accuracy of his picture of Adam’s death-scene.

  “He didn’t mean to tell me,” I spluttered, completely aware that hiding anything wouldn’t improve the situation. “When he spread his wings in front of me first, he was shocked himself. He didn’t know what was happening.” The memory was vivid in my head. “I’m sure it was the first time ever.”

  I was tired of lying. Chris seemed to know everything, so why keeping the facade? And for some reason I had the impression he also was tired of hiding. He shook his head at the outburst of information—not disapproving, but somehow relieved at the sudden honesty between us.

  “We didn’t know if he was ever going to develop his powers. He’s got it from me, you know—I’m an angel, too.”

  I stared, eyes wide open, mouth gaping.

  “Yes, it’s true.” Chris smiled at my expression, and his eyes glowed green as to prove it.

  Without a doubt he was telling the truth. My whole body shuddered. I felt tension and relief at the same time, that all that magic around Adam wasn’t gone from my life completely.

  It was somehow there the moment Chris outed himself to me. It streamed through the room and I felt a little more at ease.

  “How can you be an angel?” I asked him.

  “My father was, and so am I. And I passed the angel-gene on to Adam.” His eyes stopped glowing and he continued. “Well, we are both part-angels. My mother was human and so was Adam’s.”

  I had never heard Chris talking about Adam’s mother.

  “Ben on the other hand hasn’t shown any signs yet, and he is almost twenty. I didn’t expect either of my boys to develop powers at all. The gene is relatively weak. But a couple of weeks ago Adam turned up one evening, he was a complete mess. At first I didn’t know what was going on, but then I saw the gleaming in his eyes, and I understood—the transformation had started.

  “It’s not easy for us, the transformation. We start knowing certain things without having heard about them, it’s like you’re split in two and have to knit the parts back together without proper instruction how to do it. A strange feeling,” he mused. “First you start seeing the personality of people without knowing anything about them, just by seeing them—that’s only the minor part, but I guess you already know that.” He eyed me from the side.

  “Most new angels find it pretty helpful to see through people’s masks and facades. That’s mostly before they spread their wings for the first time. Then they start knowing the people that will be important in their life before they ever set eyes on them. That’s a feeling you have to get used to, believe me.” Chris was deep in thought, like he was remembering something. “You don’t see faces or anything, it’s just like you feel the aura of them, like you know them without knowing who they are.” He shook his head. “I don’t know how to explain it better, I’m sorry.

  “Even more strange is the feeling that you have when you see the person in real life, it’s like a puzzle fitting together. It was that way when he first saw you, he knew he had finally found the one he already loved without having met her even once. I, too, had the puzzle feeling when I first saw you, I knew you were the one that would be Adam’s greatest joy and his worst danger, I knew before I met you.”

  “Adam tried to describe it once,” I interrupted. “It was more than a month before he spread his wings.” Chris nodded.

  “I hadn’t notice the process had started then—I wish I had.” His eyes grew more distant than they already were.

  “His eyes were gleaming that evening for the first time as well.” I fed him the information. “I remember, I was really scared, it looked weird, alien.”

  Chris chuckled, and the way his lips curled reminded me of Adam. It hurt to think of him.

  “Tell me what really happened on the roof, Claire,” Chris pleaded. “I need to know the truth.”

  I took a deep breath to steady myself and started telling the real story about how he had died. About the three dark creatures, how they had hit him in the chest with the silver flashes and how he had stumbled over the edge of the roof, not standing a chance against them. Chris listened with a serious expression.

  “It was demons,” he nodded to himself. “I’ve already thought that much.”

  He got to his feet and started pacing the room, eyes on the floor, searching.

  “There are certain books in my possession which tell about the dangers of demons,” he told me as he browsed through the books that were strewn on the floor. “I remember when I spread my wings for the first time. My father taught me how to control them.

  “My father died a long time ago. In his last will he passed a box of old books on to me. I didn’t suspect anything supernatural to have caused his death until then, I hadn’t even though
t about immortality then. But when I started reading the books I began to see that they all had been collected by him for some purpose. They were all history books—but no usual history books as you might guess.” He fetched one book from the floor and carried it back to me.

  “They were on the history of angels and demons. From what I learned from them—and his countless notes on the edges of the pages—I guessed what had to have caused his death. The police had declared it an accident and let down the investigations. I was mad for ages, that nobody seemed to really care about what had happened to him. But today I’m glad nobody found out. All they would have found would have been devilish creatures that don’t show any mercy to people knowing about their existence.” He sat down in the second armchair.

  “When—” I cleared my throat. “When did you spread your wings for the first time?” I asked meekly.

  Chris looked at a shelf with a distant gaze. “It was on the sixth of September, twenty-two years ago. I was standing in the delivery ward of the hospital, next to Abigail—Adam’s biological mother.” He looked at me with a serious face. “All the doctors had left the room after checking on Adam. Abigail had died giving birth to our son and I was alone with her to see her for one last time. I held Adam in my arms, the little baby-boy who had just lost his mother and cradled him to my chest as I took one last gaze at my beloved Abigail.

  “So the doctors gave us—a minute of privacy, one last moment. I kissed her goodbye and then I pondered what I should do without her.

  “Adam looked at me with big eyes and I felt like my heart was exploding with bliss that he had survived. That moment not only my heart felt that way, but also my back. My wings shot from my shoulders and I held Adam tight to my chest, precious little thing that he was.”

  Chris’ serious face turned into an ambivalent half-smile at his last words. I could make out both happiness and pain in his eyes for a moment, then his face grew the serious mask again. “I felt so lonely without her. I had no idea how to handle the loss.” Bitterness resonated in his voice.

  He turned to the window for a while, not saying a word while he watched the bare trees outside. After what seemed like minutes he turned back to me.

  “Everything I know about demons—the other side—I know from my father’s books. He left me the instructions how to keep a low profile, how to stay off their radar.

  “ I’ve been invisible to them for more than twenty years.” He looked at me with anxious eyes. “I never told my sons what they are, hoping the gene would be too weak to break through. You can imagine how shocked I was when Adam showed the first signs. I tried to teach him how to control his abilities and told him he must use neither wings nor teleporting to stay off their radar and they can’t track him down. I guess he didn’t listen to me.

  “The moment he realized you were in danger he did everything to protect you, even if it meant for him to become vulnerable.”

  “Why didn’t he tell me that you knew about his secret?” I was a bit hurt by Adam’s distrust.

  “I guess he wanted to protect you. The less involved in all the supernatural you were, the better for your safety.”

  I snorted. “Yeah, like this was such a great plan.”

  “You’re alive,” Chris pointed out.

  “But he’s dead,” I hissed. “It’s worse than dying myself.”

  “I know,” Chris said mechanically, tears brimming in his eyes.

  A creak claimed my attention and I looked up. The door had opened and I noticed Antonio bustling around my feet.

  So, Chris was an angel, Adam had been an angel and Ben was a non transformed angel—part-angel; his powers hadn’t surfaced yet. Did Ben know what potentials he carried within?

  The world of mysteries was far more tightly woven around me than I’d thought. Jenna, Ben’s mother and Adam’s stepmother was human. Did she know?

  Antonio sat down beside me and rested his snout on my knee, his eyes looking up at me.

  “I’ve never seen such a faithful animal. Maybe it’s because Adam saved his life,” Chris said watching Antonio. “He’s still waiting for Adam to turn up, I think.” He reached out with one hand and petted the dog’s back. “He’s not coming back, Antonio, never.”

  Antonio turned to him with a small whine escaping his muzzle.

  Funeral

  “Sophie,” I sobbed into the speaker of my cell phone.

  “Claire, is that you?” Sophie asked, distress sounding in her voice.

  “Yeah,” I answered hysterically.

  “What’s wrong with you?” She was obviously worried.

  I spat the words out before a fresh wave of hysteria could tighten my throat. “Adam’s dead.”

  A long pause followed my words as Sophie processed the meaning of my words. “Claire, that’s not a good joke.”

  “Not a joke,” I choked at her.

  “Claire—” She sounded a little hysterical herself now. “When did this happen?”

  “Last night.”

  “I’m on my way,” she told me. “I’ll ask Ian to stop by and take care of you until I’m home,” she offered.

  “I’m at the Gallagers’ place,” I told her. “It’s fine.”

  “Okay. I’ll be home by tonight.”

  “Right,” I sobbed.

  “Claire—”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Thank you Sophie.” I inhaled deeply to calm my voice a little. “See you tonight.”

  I lay aside my cell phone and watched Geoffrey refill my cup of tea. The whole Gallager family was sitting at the table. All but one—he was dead.

  To Jenna’s great surprise, Chris had accompanied me to the living room. We had continued talking for a while until it had been time for the police to arrive. We had agreed that it would be best if nobody knew I had been on the roof that night, it would only open up questions. My official story now was that Adam had driven me home and kissed me good night like every other evening after a date. He must have gone back to the building and jumped from the roof.

  The officers arrived only a short time after my call and asked us questions over questions about Adam’s emotional and psychological stability. Nobody had noticed strange behavior or something that might have tipped us off on what he had been about to do. They asked us for an hour until they were satisfied with every detail they had gotten. Then they shook Chris’s, Ben’s and Jenna’s hands with a serious face, nodded at me and vanished through the front door. It was a straining procedure and it tore on my stability as well as it did on Jenna’s. I didn’t know if it affected Ben—he wouldn’t show any emotion after his first moment of weakness.

  “I can’t believe I never noticed anything,” Jenna said between her tears, and Chris nodded at her, soothing her with his arms around her shoulders.

  “I think I’ll get going,” I announced. I needed to get out of here. I didn’t trust myself to not snap right in front of them. I already imagined myself screaming and cowering on the floor, unable to keep up the facade.

  “Thanks for breakfast, Jenna.” I forced a half-smile. It didn’t feel very convincing on my lips.

  “You barely ate,” she sobbed.

  “Not hungry, really,” I reassured her. “My sister is going to be home soon. I should be there when she arrives.”

  I walked towards the front door after hugging Adam’s parents and earning another cold gaze from Ben, glad to be on my own for a while before I had to retell everything for Sophie in the evening.

  My car was standing where I had left it hours before.

  I searched my pockets for the key and got in. I hadn’t left the driveway when I hit the brake so hard the car slid several yards on the gravel before it came to a halt.

  “Sorry,” Jaden’s golden voice sounded through the cabin. “It’s just me.” He placed his hand on my arm, trying to calm me down. “Breathe.”

  “What the hell are you thinking!” I screamed at him. “You scared me to death!”

 
“Sorry again.” He eyed me for a moment. “Go on driving.”

  I pressed down the gas pedal and steered my car into the traffic on the main street. It was pretty much empty.

  I accelerated to a speed that was far too fast for the town. Adam was all I could think about. Pain seared through my body without a warning. It drove me crazy—however much I tried to remain calm I couldn’t. My heart was simply incapable of calming, my body wasn’t and neither was my head.

  “Claire, where are you going?” Jaden asked through the haze that was surrounding my thoughts.

  I had no answer. I couldn’t see much more than shapes and colors. Everything was gray with a bit of red, blue or green rushing by at top speed.

  “Claire!” he screamed from the passenger seat. “I know it hurts, but will you please calm down…”

  I didn’t listen to what else he was saying. My heart felt as if it was being torn from my chest over and over again. The unbearable pain spread through every fiber of my body without mercy. I couldn’t think clearly and I couldn’t make myself scared of the possibility I could die right now, losing control over my car. It was quite the opposite—I found them intriguing.

  Something grabbed my arm hard. I could barely feel it against the pulsing agony that came from inside me. Someone was screaming at me—I didn’t hear the words, just loud noise without meaning—like my life; meaningless without Adam. I had been nothing before him and I was nothing without him.

  “Claire!”

  My hands were torn from the steering wheel. I was shaken to the left and hit the door of the car with my shoulder. It hurt. Then I was thrown to the right, felling something warm at my other shoulder. And then I was catapulted to the front.

  My head hit the steering wheel so hard I felt dizzy above all the pain and the haze.

  I heard the door being opened. A warm hand pressed me back towards the seat and then probed my head with gentle fingers.

  Then I was lifted out of the seat and felt a loss of orientation.