Inchbracken: The Story of a Fama Clamosa

by Robert Cleland

  CHAPTER XXII.

  _IN SESSION_.

  The joint meeting of elders and deacons broke up as described, andleft the minister alone. They did not separate, however, for EbenezerPrittie stood without the cottage door, and begged them so urgently tocome round to the Post Office that they consented.

  The Post Office proved a meeting place still more restricted than theone they had left, but it was private. The shop having been closed,they seated themselves on the counter and sundry kegs of nails, andwaited the opening of the proceedings.

  Ebenezer moved that Mr. Sangster should take the chair (a tallslender-legged stool), and that the proceedings should be minuted inthe Session books, as a continuance after adjournment of the meetingwhich had just broken up. Mr. Sangster objected to so irregular acourse, and declined to mount the chair. He would be happy to hold aninformal conversation with his friends there assembled, but he wouldtake no part in a hole-and-corner meeting not duly called, and heldwithout the knowledge of their minister, who of right should preside.

  Ebenezer coughed behind his hand, cleared his voice, and stood forth.He had been planning something very energetic in the way ofresolutions and minutes of Session, which by and by would be producedin the Presbytery with his name as prime mover and leader; but now hehad got them together, it did not appear such plain sailing as he hadanticipated, and he began to have qualms and misgivings. The positionof prosecutor or accuser did not appear so desirous, now that he stoodin the midst of that silent and expectant circle, as it had done whenhe was merely planning it. He coughed again, but the silence remainedunbroken. No one else desired to speak, so he had to go on. He toldthem that it was unnecessary for him to name the reason for his havingrequested them to reassemble there, as they knew it already. Mr.Sangster interrupted, that he for one had not an idea of the object oftheir meeting, and was waiting to hear it. Ebenezer replied that thewhole glen was ringing with reports of the evil living of the personacting as pastor over them,--that it was a crying scandal, and thatthe enemy would have good cause to exult over the subversion of theirZion, if they did not cast the unclean thing out from among them.'

  'What do you allude to. Mr. Prittie?' asked Mr. Sangster.

  'To the minister's bairn, sir!' replied Ebenezer; 'ye hardly need tospeer that.'

  'But Mr. Brown's adoption of a foundling infant affords no ground ofcensure that I can see. I confess, indeed, that I have always thoughthe had set us an example of Christian charity we would do well tocopy.'

  'Do ye mean to say, sir, ye dinna ken wha's acht that bairn?'

  'I do. Whose is it?'

  'His ain, of course!'

  'How do you know?'

  'A' body kens that by noo, 'at bides in Glen Effick.'

  '_I_ don't, for one; and I should like to know how _you_ know it.'

  'What a' body says maun be true! Ye'll allow _that_, Mester Sangster.An' what's mair, the mither's kenned as weel.'

  'And who is the mother? Has she said so?'

  'A body wadna just look for that, ye ken, sir. Folk dizna cry stinkin'fish e'y open market. An' ye wadna be lookin' to hear auld TibbieTirpie cryin' 'cuttie' after her ain dochter!'

  'How then do you make it out? For myself, I don't believe one word ofit.'

  'Do ye mean to say 'at I'm leein', Mester Sangster? I'm but a puir manto you, I ken weel; an' I'm mindin' 'at ye're the Laird of Auchlippie;but I was ordeened to the eldership o' the kirk the same day ye wasyoursel', an' I'm thinkin' we're baith brithers in the house o' God,whaur there's no respect of persons; an' I kenna what for ye suldthink I'm leein' ony mair nor yersel'.'

  'Whisht, man!' remonstrated Peter Malloch. 'The Laird never thocht tomisdoubt _you_. It's just a way o' speakin' folk's gotten. But I'msayin', Mester Sangster, I cud gang a lang gate mysel' e'y pruivin' o'thae suspeecions. I hae seen the minister wi' my ain een, slinkin'frae the auld wife's door, lang efter dark; an' the verra next day,doon she comes to me for tea an' sneeshin' an' sic like trokes as apuir body can do wantin' weel eneugh, an' pays a' wi' a pund note o'the Peterhead Bank. There's nae misdoubtin' whaur that siller camfrae! An' folk dinna gie notes to puir bodies for naething.'

  'Folk differ in that as in other things, Peter,' retorted the lairdwith a shrug. 'Some wad gie a bodle gin they had ane, an' when theyhaena they gie a bawbee. An' mony's the button I hae fand in the kirkcollections in my time! But I can't see that therefore we mustattribute Mr. Brown's liberality to an evil motive. He preachesliberal giving, you know, and he practises what he preaches. Perhapswe might all take a lesson from him and increase our charities withoutgoing beyond our duty.'

  'Hech!' sighed a voice in the corner, 'it's no the amount! It's thespeerit it's dune in; an' that's a grand truith, an' a comfortin'. Itwas the Widdie's twa mites 'at gat a' the praise!'

  'Yes!' retorted the Laird with a chuckle, 'but they were all herliving! The chield that put the button in the plate gets littlecountenance there! But, to return to the rumours; there would have tobe some more conclusive evidence before any step could be taken in thematter. As I have said before, I believe the whole thing is just idletalk, and I will be no party to insulting Mr. Brown by even bringingsuch an insinuation under his notice. This parish and the whole churchowe him gratitude for his zealous and self-denying labours. I regardthe whole tenor of his life among us as ample refutation of anyunsubstantiated report that can be circulated to his disparagement;and I wonder that any office-bearer of this church, after all theintercourse we have been privileged to have with him, can thinkotherwise. I think it is the duty of all here present, to put downthis tattling of idle tongues; and if we cannot stop, at least weshould not heed them, and by-and-by they will cease to wag ofthemselves.'

  'It's braw crackin' about tatlin' tongues,' said Peter Malloch, 'butwadna we be giein' the enemy grund to blaspheme? an' that's cleancontrar' to Scripter. A bonny tale the reseeduaries wad mak o't a',gin it cam to their lugs! They're aye sayin', as it is, 'at the uncogude (an' that means hiz) are nae better nor ither folk, but a hantlewaur. An' as for Mester Brown an' his giein', there's mair ways o'doin' gude nor juist giein siller to feckless bodies 'at canna helpthemsels. What for canna hie gie a help to the honest hard workin'folk 'at's fechtin' their best to gar baith ends meet, an' support thelawfu' tred o' his ain glen? "Claw me an' I'se claw ye," is gude plenScotch. Gin folk peys their pennies intil the Sustentation Fundreglar, it's gey an yerksom to see the minister's family gae by thedoor, an' dale wi' outsiders. It'll be a week come the morn 'at thecarrier frae Inverlyon brocht them a muckle creel fu' o' groceries.What wad come to the tred o' the glen gin a' body dealt that gate?'

  'Hoot, Peter,' snorted the Laird, 'the sand in yer sugar's been owergrit! I'm thinkin' I heard tell o' a sma' chuckie stane in MissBrown's tea-cup. Folk are na juist hens, ye see, an' dinna find sicprovender halesome.'

  Something like a snigger followed the Laird's sally. No one elsepresent being a 'merchant' of eatables, the joke was greatly relished.It is always pleasant to see a neighbour suffer, because it givespoint and relish to one's own immunity. It is a form of childishsensuality that survives the relish for lollipops, but it is perhapsmost openly indulged in during the lollipop period. Whispering andrestlessness become hushed all over the school-room when a whipping isgoing forward. Each child settles in its seat to watch theperformance, all eyes and interest; the sharper the whish of the caneand the louder the wail of the victim, the more pleasurable and keenthe interest of each spectator, for the better he realizes the easeand comfort of his own little skin.

  Peter flushed. The laird was a privileged man, who might take his jokeas he pleased, but no prescriptive immunity sheltered the rest.

  'I see naething to nicker at, Ebenezer Prittie! Gin onything fellamang my sugar I ken naething about it ava, as I'll explain to MissBrown; but I see na hoo yer ain ellwand can be an inch shorter norither folks, an' ye no ken o't.'

  'I daur ye to say that again, ye ill-faured leein' rascal! Gin it
warna for my godly walk and conversation, as a Christian man an' anElder, I'd lay the ellwand about yer crappet lugs!'

  Here there was a general intervention between the two angry men, andthe laird expressed his regret at having used any expression thatcould disturb the harmony of the meeting, but they knew his weaknessfor a joke; and as everything seemed to have been said on the subjectthey had met to consider, and as it was getting late, he would nowwish them all good-night.

  'I see na that a' has been said,' observed Ebenezer, so soon as theLaird was beyond hearing, 'or that ony thing has been said ava that'sony gude. Are we to let the hale thing drap, an' mak fules o' oursel'safore the hale glen, just to pleasure Auchlippie? I trow no!'

  'An' what wad ye be for doin' then?' asked one.

  'I'll tell ye what we suld do,' suggested another. 'Isna Mester Dowlascomin' to haud the meetin,' an' lay the fundation o' the new Kirk? An'what for suldna we ca' him to adveese wi' us what ocht to be dune? I'mthinkin' he's as weel able as Auchlippie to direc' folk, an' we neednabe feared to anger _him_, he's no a laird.'

  'Aweel!' said Ebenezer, who had now mounted on the top of the tallstool, and was benevolently regarding the meeting from hisself-appointed station as chairman. 'Ye'll better juist muive that,Andra Semple, an' as I'm e'y chair I'll put yer motion to the meetin'.An' syne _ye_ can muive an adjournment, Elluck Lamont, an' we'lladjourn to Thursday efternoon, whan the kirk skells. An' sae we'll bea' in order ('let a'thing be dune decently an' in order,' says theApostle) till we get Mester Dowlas to set us richt.'

  Thus the meeting had but small direct result. Its effect indirectly,however, was considerable. When, early that evening, the members hadstolen down the lane near the minister's cottage, to intercept eachother and feel circuitously towards the point of interest, each wouldhave been ashamed, first and unsupported, to repeat aloud the rumoursthat had reached him. When he had heard them in the first instance,usually from his wife--it is the gentle sex usually which originatesor introduces such tales, probably because it has no head to break,which is to say, that its corporal immunities in a civilized landenable it to say unpunished what would bring down on the male tattlerboth brawls and broken bones,--he had at first declared it wasimpossible, and then that it was unlikely; and even when, afterdwelling on it in his mind, the love of a sensation made him halfthink half hope there might be something in it, he would hesitate toallude to it save by a whisper and a shake of the head, and wouldcaution his wife not to repeat it, or let herself appear as one whowas giving it currency. When, however, the matter had been talkedover, audible speech exercised its usual defining and contractinginfluence. The mysterious and appalling, as well as the doubtfulelement, became vulgarised as well as realized. Without any additionalevidence, yet in the company of so many others who all believed, eachfelt it due to his own character for clear-sightedness and high moraltone to dismiss every remnant of doubt, and to be eager for theexposure and punishment of the offender. Afterwards, in the presenceof the accused himself, their certainty had begun a little to waver.The many pieties and goodnesses associated with him in their memories,were too discordant with this new and vulgar suspicion, and probablyhad they met him each alone, they would have dismissed the accusationfrom their minds; but each sat under the scrutinizing eyes of histwelve or thirteen fellows. They were the eyes into which he hadlooked, a little while ago, when he had made up his mind that therumours were well founded; and as he felt their glance on him now, itwas like a voice urging steadfastness and consistency with what he hadbeen saying so shortly before. Those persons looking at him had heardhim say that he believed everything; how, then, could he, while stillunder their eye, turn round and dismiss his suspicions without any newfact or argument to account for the change? Nevertheless, the zeal ofthe old Hebrew prophets, which some of them had felt stirring in theirveins and urging them to lift a testimony and denounce the sinner inthe midst of his ways, had cooled and oozed away as they sat round thesickbed; each looked expectantly to the others, but felt he could notundertake the work himself. It was a relief to all of them to leavethe sick-room, and when they re-assembled at the Post Office, theyfelt more strongly built up in their suspicions than ever. If anythingcould have bound them more firmly to their position, it was Mr.Sangster's scant respect for the conclusion at which they had arrived.They were willing to admit his superiority both in position andeducation, and probably any one of them would have deferred to him ifalone; but the sturdy democratic or Presbyterian element in themobjected to so many yielding to the one who wore a better coat and hadlearned Latin; and when in the end he tried to dismiss the meeting,after pooh-poohing its object as absurd, they felt bound to assertthemselves by boldly and openly taking the other course.

  All reserve, therefore, was dropped. Each had all the others to bearhim out in whatever he said; and that night he openly discussed thesupposed facts with his wife while she prepared his supper.

  The next morning the 'stoups' stood empty at the well, and heaps ofwet linen lay neglected and unspread down on the 'loaning,' whiletheir owners in garrulous knots discussed the minister's misdoings,and Peter Malloch sold more little parcels of tea and snuff than hehad ever done in one day before, so many of the gudewives desired toget his version with full particulars.