The Warrior's Princess

by Barbara Erskine

  ‘No!’ Jess shook her head. She turned back towards Eigon. ‘Tell your mother he is ruthless. Pretending he is not there will not save you!’

  Eigon had gone pale. She put her hands to her head. ‘Leave me alone!’ She was staring round in confusion.

  ‘Tell her!’ Jess called out. ‘Tell her. He will kill you if you don’t.’

  ‘Jess!’ Will was knocking on the door. ‘Who are you talking to? Open up.’

  ‘No! Go away, Will!’

  She could see Eigon but her figure had grown less substantial. She was fading. Scrambling to her feet furiously, she dragged the door open. ‘You idiot! Why can’t you leave me alone! Now she’s gone.’ She turned tearfully and stared round the room. ‘I can’t see her any more.’

  ‘You can’t see her because she’s not there, Jess.’ Will caught her arm. ‘Calm down and come through here. Carmella is making us some more coffee. Come and sit down.’

  ‘Will?’ Steph appeared behind him. ‘Leave her to me. Jess, come on. Will’s right. She’s gone. There is nothing you can do.’

  ‘You don’t understand.’ Jess shrugged stubbornly. ‘None of you understand. I’m the only one who can save her.’

  ‘You can’t save her, Jess. That’s the point.’ Steph put her arm round Jess’s shoulders and guided her through to the sofa. She pushed her down firmly. ‘Sit down and calm down. When you can think rationally you will see this is all nonsense. You can’t save anyone. You can’t speak to Eigon.’

  ‘Why not?’ Carmella appeared in the kitchen doorway. She had a large cafetière in her hand. She set it down on the table. ‘Of course she can speak to her.’

  ‘But she can’t change what happened!’ Steph insisted. ‘She can’t make whatever happened in the past better, can she?’ She straightened up and stared at Carmella accusingly.

  ‘I can warn her,’ Jess repeated. ‘I am sure I can warn her. She heard me. She knew I was there.’

  Will came and sat down beside her. ‘Jess, darling. Please listen.’

  ‘Don’t you call me darling!’ Jess turned on him. ‘Just leave me alone! All of you, leave me alone!’ She stood up and fled into Carmella’s bedroom.

  Carmella followed her and closed the door. ‘They don’t understand, Jess. That is natural. But you must be careful. Please don’t do anything without me there. I can at least watch your back.’ She gave an apologetic smile. ‘We are in such controversial country here. Steph has seen your Eigon herself but she still can’t bring herself to believe it all completely. Will doesn’t believe anything much at all. Kim thinks it is all a party trick, no more than that. We know it is real. But we also know it is dangerous. If you can’t do as I suggest and stop thinking about her, we must at least go with a book of rules and back up, yes?’

  Jess stood in front of the mirror for a moment, then grabbed Carmella’s comb and ran it through her hair. Her face was very pale. ‘We are having a bad time, you and I, Eigon,’ she murmured. She leaned forward, peering harder. The second face in the mirror was indistinct. She turned round. It was as though she was staring into another room through some kind of a glass wall. She could see Eigon standing in front of her work bench. She was making up a herbal brew. Carefully adding hot water to her bowl. She could see the small brazier and the pan where she had heated it, the shelves of bottles and jars and boxes on the wall behind her, the neat line of probes and tweezers, a small scalpel, a bowl of what looked like moss and a pile of linen bandages, neatly folded. By her shoulder a bunch of some kind of herb was hanging from the ceiling.

  ‘Eigon? Can you hear me?’ she whispered.

  Eigon looked up. She frowned. Then she went back to her task.

  ‘I’m in trouble too.’ Jess glanced at the door. She was speaking in a whisper. ‘Titus has invaded Dan’s head. I don’t know what to do.’

  She paused. Eigon had turned away from her table. She was looking not towards Jess but at the door. It opened and an old man came in. Jess caught her breath. It was the leader of the Christians in Rome. Peter.

  St Peter.

  ‘How is he?’ Eigon asked. There were tears in her eyes.

  ‘His heart is weak, Eigon.’ Peter shook his head.

  ‘Can Jesus not heal him? I thought he could do anything.’

  Peter smiled. ‘Indeed he can, my child. But sometimes he knows that another course is best. We cannot live for ever. That is not part of God’s plan for us. Your father is tired, Eigon. You know that.’

  ‘And he won’t be baptised.’

  ‘He is like my friend Melinus. He wants to cover his options.’ Peter laughed quietly. ‘As does another young woman who stands not a large distance from me at this moment. Jesus wants our whole commitment,’ he added sternly, but then he went on more gently, ‘but he knows how hard it is to change. He knows that we are only human and frail. He will bless your father.’

  ‘My father wants to go to the heaven of our own people. He wants to go back to the country of his birth. He told me that Jesus’s heaven sounded like Nero’s gardens. He doesn’t want to go there.’

  Peter gave a short sharp bark of laughter. ‘The Lord Jesus does not base his gardens on those of the Emperor of Rome.’ He looked at her and put a gentle hand on her arm. ‘Jesus told us that his house has many mansions; I am sure there are as many gardens. There is one there for your father. And there is one there for you.’ He pulled up a stool. ‘I have prayed for you, Eigon, many times. Melinus saw much strength and good in you, my daughter. He begged me to look after you.’

  Eigon frowned. ‘Melinus was a good man.’

  ‘He was. And I will tell you a secret. I baptised him in the prison, Eigon, the night before he died. He died in the knowledge that he would go to my father and your father in heaven. And he knew that the Isles of the Blest would be there waiting for him.’

  Eigon stared at him, awestruck. ‘You know about Tir n’an Og?’

  ‘It is but another name in another language. God has told me to preach to all men, of whatever race and language. I have to spread his word amongst people everywhere.’

  ‘But –’

  Peter held up his hand. ‘Listen to me. Jesus has chosen you for a special task.’

  ‘Me?’ She went white. ‘No!’

  ‘When your father dies, and he will die soon, Eigon, you must resign yourself to that.’ He paused and gave her a gentle smile. ‘You are to return to your homeland. And you will tell them about Jesus.’

  ‘But I’m not baptised.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘You want me to be?’

  ‘Of course. But that is your decision to make. You must pray. Jesus will speak to you himself.’

  ‘Do Pomponia and Felicius know about this?’

  He shook his head. ‘This is between you and me and the Lord.’

  She realised suddenly that she had been shredding a bunch of thyme. The dusty leaves were scattered over her work bench. She threw the stems down. ‘I’m forbidden to return to Britannia.’

  He nodded. ‘It will take courage.’

  ‘I don’t know anyone there.’

  ‘You are the daughter of their king.’

  ‘And their king still needs me here.’ She turned away from him. ‘I can’t go.’

  He smiled. ‘When Our Lord asks you, you will go.’ She could feel his will beginning to bend her own. She swung round ready to argue, but his stern smile stopped her in her tracks. He shook his head. ‘Do not fret, Eigon. He will not ask you to go as long as your father needs you. He told us to honour our fathers and our mothers.’ He rested his hand for a moment on her arm. She could feel the strength and warmth of his grip. It reassured her.

  ‘Jess? Come back.’

  Eigon turned and stared at Jess, as though hearing something in the distance. Jess bent closer, listening hard.

  ‘Rhodri is here.’ The voice was indistinct. Irritating. She shook her head, trying to push it away.

  ‘Come on, Jess.’ A deeper stronger tone now. Rhodri. The hand on her w
rist was his. Not Peter’s. Peter had his hand on Eigon’s wrist. Not hers. She closed her eyes.

  ‘Wake up, Jess. Come on.’ There was a murmur in the background. Carmella was saying something. Jess felt the words drift past her.

  Peter had gone.

  Eigon had turned to follow him but in the atrium she stopped. Antonia was standing there, waiting for her. The two young women embraced.

  Jess went on watching, aware that she felt suddenly on the outside, no longer part of the scene, rejected as Eigon and her friend sat down together, their heads close, their tears for Julia and for the dying king mingling as they clutched one another’s hands.

  They looked up suddenly and both young women smiled, and Jess saw Julius making his way through the door towards them. He held out his arms and Eigon ran into them. It was a simple, brotherly gesture of comfort and support, the three of them locked together in their misery and confusion.

  ‘Jess!’ Rhodri put his hands on her shoulders. He shook her gently. ‘Come back now, girl. No more of this!’

  ‘She hasn’t told them. They don’t know about Titus!’ Jess tried to pull away. ‘She must tell them!’

  ‘Later. She can tell them later.’ Rhodri was still holding onto her. ‘Jess! Pull yourself together.’ This time his voice was loud; commanding. She blinked and shook her head. ‘That’s right. Come on. Pay attention!’

  ‘Get off me!’ Suddenly she was there in the room with him. She gave him a push, wrenching herself free. ‘How dare you!’

  ‘Jess, Rhodri is here to help you.’ Carmella sounded reproachful.

  ‘I’ve got the car outside. Your stuff is in it. We’re heading out now.’ Rhodri calmly ignored her fury. ‘It’s up to you. Either you come with me now back to Wales or I dump your stuff here and I go without you. Your choice.’

  She stared at him, confused. She hesitated. ‘I don’t know, Rhodri. It’s kind of you, of course it is.’

  ‘Too right!’ he snorted. ‘So? Your decision.’

  ‘I can’t go. I have to warn her –’

  ‘No, you don’t have to warn anyone about anything!’ He glanced heavenwards in exasperation. ‘For God’s sake, woman!’

  ‘Jess, go with him.’ Will came and crouched on his heels next to her. ‘You have to get out of Rome.’

  ‘Just go, Jess.’ Carmella shivered. ‘While you can.’

  Jess was shaking her head, glancing one way then the other, confused and anxious, her brain in turmoil.

  ‘Jess, if you won’t go with Rhodri, come with me. We’ll go straight to the airport.’ Will caught her hand.

  ‘Eigon –’

  ‘If Eigon wants to communicate with you she will do it wherever you are, Jess,’ Carmella put in. ‘She showed herself to you in Wales before, didn’t she?’

  Jess stood up. Will was too close. He was crowding her. So was Rhodri. She looked from one to the other feeling the pressure. Beginning to panic. ‘I can’t go. I have to know what happens. I’ve seen St Peter. Think of that!’ She pushed between them. ‘I have been given the chance to see into their world. Can’t you understand what that means? How amazing it is? I am privileged! I can’t just go.’

  Will sat back on his heels with a sigh. ‘Are you ready to risk being murdered?’

  ‘Dan’s not going to murder me. He thinks you think I’m insane.’ She gave a wry laugh. ‘That’s enough for him. He’s done what he wanted.’

  She saw Will and Rhodri glance at each other in exasperation. ‘It’s my decision, after all,’ she said after a moment. Her voice was calmer now. ‘You can’t force me to go with you anywhere. You’re not like Dan. You are rational, very, very nice men.’ She smiled from one to the other. ‘Thank you for everything you have done for me. But I can’t go on putting you two at risk. Or you.’ She turned to Carmella. ‘I will go and stay in a hotel somewhere where no one knows me. I will lock myself in and be perfectly safe, then I can contact Eigon as much as I like and find out what happens to her. I can warn her about that bastard, Titus. She can see me and hear me. I’ve realised that at last. She is looking through a window into the future just as I am looking through a window into the past. I can reach her.’

  There was a long silence. Jess grimaced. ‘Oh God! You are all looking so shocked. I’m not mad. I promise.’

  ‘No?’ Steph raised an eyebrow.

  ‘No.’ Jess shrugged.

  ‘Dan has followed you everywhere else. You think he won’t follow you out of this flat, today?’ Kim said slowly.

  ‘I’ve given him the slip before.’

  ‘Not very effectively, if I may say so,’ Rhodri said caustically. He was eyeing her with a certain sneaking admiration. She was standing in front of them with a defiance which he was beginning to think was not only insane but rather wonderful. He saw her gaze shift thoughtfully to his face and he winked at her. ‘OK. What do you want to do with your stuff?’

  ‘Could you take it back to Wales? If I collect a few things just to tide me over.’ If she did what Carmella told her this time and avoided thinking about Titus, wouldn’t that keep her safe? She gave Rhodri a watery grin.

  ‘Whatever you like.’ He nodded.

  ‘You’re driving back?’ Will asked sharply.

  Rhodri shrugged. ‘I’ve arranged to keep the car on a bit longer now. I may as well.’

  Will leaned forward suddenly. ‘I’ve had an idea. What about a decoy? When were you thinking of going home, Steph?’

  Steph shrugged. ‘Soon, I suppose. Kim is going up to the lakes in a week or so when Rome gets too hot even for her!’ She glanced at Kim who nodded.

  ‘Then why don’t you go with Rhodri. Borrow Jess’s top. Her glasses. Her scarf. Anything. Set off at dead of night. Look furtive.’

  Rhodri laughed at the look of horror on Steph’s face. ‘It just might work this time. It might get him off your back for a while, Jess.’

  ‘Would you do that?’ Jess looked at her sister in weary amusement. The thought of Steph and Rhodri driving across Europe in the confines of a single car, however powerful, filled her with wistful glee.

  Steph frowned. ‘I think I could bring myself to do that if you think it would do any good. Why not? It could be fun.’ She couldn’t hide the lack of enthusiasm in her tone.

  ‘What if he doesn’t rise to the bait?’ Will asked. ‘He does seem to be able to find you every time!’

  ‘You stay and keep an eye on Jess,’ Rhodri said. ‘That way every eventuality is covered.’ He was watching Jess’s face. Her eyes had narrowed at the last suggestion.

  It was the only idea they could come up with in the face of Jess’s intransigence and in the event the whole strategy, once decided, proved extraordinarily easy to perform. Kim and Will went back to the palazzo almost at once and Will left a while later by a hitherto unsuspected service door at the opposite side of the building to the entrance to the gardens. He was going to check in at a cheap hotel for a few days while he did some sightseeing of his own and stay within reach of Jess’s mobile should she need him. It was the only concession she would make towards him.

  Rhodri and Steph left at midnight, looking suitably shifty, climbed into the hired Mercedes and drove slowly and carefully out of Rome, resisting the temptation to look back.

  Next morning Jess strolled out of Carmella’s flat wearing a pair of Carmella’s Versace jeans and a Prada shirt, Carmella’s huge dark glasses, a scarlet Hermes headscarf covering her hair. The leather haversack over her shoulder was Carmella’s, as was the bright lipstick. The disguise would fool no one who was close enough to see her in detail, but a figure lounging on a street corner in the distance might be misled for a while. The two women were of similar build and Jess briefly studied Carmella’s swaying walk and elegant posture, even borrowing a pair of Gucci sandals for her exit sashay down the street. It was hard to keep a straight face, easy to forget, just for a few minutes, her fear and anger as she walked away towards the Via Condotti and freedom.

  In the ladies’ room of a te
rrifyingly smart store she admitted defeat and slipped out of the high-heeled shoes and put on a pair of her own from the haversack. She left by a different door from the one she had entered and at last able to move faster headed towards her new refuge, a pensione belonging to an acquaintance of Carmella’s. Ironically it was quite close to Kim’s apartment, on the far side of the Campo de’ Fiori in a narrow winding street of medieval houses.

  The whole house was ancient, built into the surviving wall of a long-gone church, with rooms crammed with antiques and curios, curtains swagged with heavy tassels, pictures and ornaments vying for space on the walls, the dark oak staircase creaking like a ship in a storm as she followed her hostess, whose name was Margaretta, up to the top floor. She stared round her room in delight. It was small, one wall the rough stone of the old church against which the house huddled, the furniture charmingly eclectic in style. Left alone to settle in, she dropped the haversack on the floor and sat down on the bed with a sigh of pleasure.

  Remember to protect yourself all the time. Do not allow Titus into your head or you are lost. Carmella’s parting words echoed for a moment in her ears. Make this place a refuge and a base from which to conduct your research. Do not become a slave to him, or indeed to Eigon or you will lose your own soul!

  Jess bit her lip. Now she was here, safe from Dan, on her own, if their plans had worked, she felt a strange reluctance to do anything except lie down on the bed and close her eyes. She glanced down at the haversack. Her mobile was in there. She could call anyone if she wanted to. She could ring Steph and see how far they had got; see if Dan was following them. She frowned. She should ring Will, tell him she had arrived safely and as far as she could see un-followed. He would be worrying. She gave a wistful smile. He was doing so much for her sake. She stood up and wandered over to the window. The street was narrow and she could see nothing below; opposite a woman appeared briefly at a window in the house across the street, shook out a duster then stood back out of the sunlight, pulling the slatted shutters half closed as she disappeared. The action was almost symbolic, the final cutting of the connection between Jess and the rest of the world. She turned back into the room.