All the Wrong Places

by Jerilee Kaye

  “Uncle Jin!” Jared beamed, finally noticing Jin’s presence behind them.

  Jared released Julianne and threw himself in Jin’s arms. Jin caught him, lifting him off his feet.

  “You get heavier each day, sweetheart!” Jin said.

  Seeing them together was giving Julianne a headache. They looked so much like each other, it was a wonder no one ever mentioned their uncanny resemblance. It was an even bigger mystery why Jin didn’t even ask her who Jared’s father was.

  “Are you going to stay here?” Jared asked.

  “Ummm… I might,” Jin replied.

  “Really? Will you sleep in my room again? Like the last time?”

  The last time? What the hell?

  Julianne stared at Jin in disbelief. He glanced her way briefly and she took that moment to raise a questioning brow at him.

  What was Jared talking about?

  Instead of explaining, Jin turned to Jared and chuckled. He tickled him and said, “I thought we agreed that was going to be our secret.”

  Jared’s eyes widened. “Oh no! Will that get you into trouble, Uncle Jin?”

  “I think so,” Jin replied. “But I’ll deal with it later. Come! You promised to show me some drawings when I came back, remember?”

  “Yes! I drew so many things! I used the pens you gave me,” Jared said excitedly. “Come on, I’ll show you!” Jin put him down on his feet. Jared took his hand and started pulling him towards the house. He turned to Julianne and said, “Later, Mom!”

  “Jin!” Julianne hissed at Jin as Jared started dragging him away.

  Jin turned to her and said, “Later, Mom!” mimicking Jared, and effectively avoiding her inquisitions.

  What the hell was that about?

  Julianne watched them walk up the steps and disappeared into the house. She could hear her son’s excited voice and Jin’s laughter. They look so much alike. And until now, Julianne didn’t realize how close they were.

  When did Jin Starck sleep in my son’s bedroom? More importantly… why?

  She went up the steps and entered the house. She was met by Viktor, the butler.

  “Good day, Miss Julianne. Happy to have you back,” he greeted.

  “Thanks, Viktor,” Julianne said. “Everything well while I was gone?”

  “Yes. While you were gone,” Viktor replied.

  “And now?”

  Viktor shrugged.

  “What is it, Viktor?”

  “It’s not my place to say. But… Mister Justin and Mister Jac has a… er… important guest in the tea room now.”

  Julianne studied Viktor’s face. He looked uncertain and she got even more curious.

  “Who?”

  Viktor was hesitant to reply.

  “Who?” she repeated.

  Finally, Viktor took a deep breath and replied, “Your father.”

  And just like that, Julianne’s heart started beating fast before it dropped to her feet, and she felt another urge to faint.

  15.

  Julianne’s heart raced and she could feel her pulse hammering in her veins.

  What’s going on? What’s my father doing here?

  “Is my brother here?” she asked Viktor.

  Viktor shook his head. “I haven’t a clue, Miss Sanders.”

  “Thank you,”

  She went up the steps and walked towards the tea room, where Viktor said her father was.

  Since she’d arrived in this house, her father had never set foot in here again. He never attended any of their family affairs since she came back to the States.

  Why is he here now?

  Does this mean, he had a change of heart?

  Is he finally open to meeting his grandson?

  Is he ready to forgive me and we can start anew?

  The door to the tea room had been left ajar. She went closer, hoping to catch a bit of their conversation. She wouldn’t really eavesdrop. She just wanted to know the mood. And she wanted to hear his father’s voice again. It had been seven long years.

  “With all due respect, Uncle Edward,” she heard Justin say in a firm voice. “My parents had nothing to do with this. It was my decision.”

  “You have always been meddling with the family’s decision, Justin. You have somehow designated yourself as a savior of some sort. Someday, your arrogance will get the better of you,” her father said. He didn’t sound happy at all.

  “Edward, my son is his own man. He’s almost never wrong with his decisions. I trust him. He knows what he’s doing.”

  Are they talking about business? Maybe I shouldn’t be listening to this.

  She was about to walk away but she heard his father say in a loud, booming voice, “You are interfering with my family’s affair!”

  “Uncle Edward,” Justin’s voice was firm but controlled. “Are you forgetting? Ian was no longer your family when you threw her out of the house in the midst of her pregnancy? At the time she needed you the most?”

  “She deserved it for the shame that she brought our family!” her father said angrily.

  “Well, not all of us share your opinion,” Justin said. “Only you disowned her. She’s still my family. She has every right to live in this house. And you don’t have a say about it.”

  “Edward, what do you want?” Jac Adams asked. His voice also sounded stressed and Julianne knew that he’s almost always calm. “This is not your house. It’s mine. My father built it. And it’s Justin’s too. Justin has every right to say who comes in and out of here. Only he and I can decide who can live here or not. Are you demanding that we throw out your daughter and her son too? When you know very well she has nowhere to go?”

  “Her being here is a slap in the face for me. You are disrespecting my family’s decision to disown her! She has no right in this family anymore. She waived all that when she sired that bastard of hers!”

  Julianne was crushed to hear her father say those words about her. Not only did he disown her. He wants everybody else who cared for her to disown her too.

  “Jared!” Justin said, raising his own voice.

  “What?” Mister Sanders asked.

  “Your grandson has a name,” Justin said in a grave tone. “Jared Adrien Sanders. That’s his name.”

  “Oh, so Julianne thought it proper for the bastard to carry my name as well?”

  “You son of a bitch!” she heard Jac curse. “You’re mad at your daughter, we know. But leave the poor boy out of this! If you have no heart for them, just leave them to us! We will take care of both of them. We want nothing from you.”

  “Julianne and Jared can use my maiden family name,” Julianne recognized her Aunt Christine’s voice. She wasn’t even aware that she was also in the room. “She can use Smith. She shouldn’t have to carry your surname. You do not deserve her!”

  “Say whatever you want to say. This family has rules. And you, Justin, had broken it the second time around!” Edward said angrily. “How do you think Mason’s father feel now? Instead of Mason begging for their forgiveness, you gave him an option to defy them even further. His head had gotten big! He has no need for his parents anymore thinking he’d become a successful gambler.”

  “Mason’s success comes from running a gambling hotel, not from gambling itself. There’s a huge difference,” Justin pointed out.

  “A hotel he couldn’t have afforded without your meddling!” Edward said angrily. “And now, you’re doing the same to my daughter! She needs to feel remorse for her actions! And she’s not going to do that, with you people constantly helping her! She needs to repent for what she had done to my name!”

  “You didn’t want her to repent, Uncle. You wanted her to suffer,” Justin argued. “And she did. She suffered for years. And she has suffered more than enough. I’m giving her a chance to live her life and make something out of herself, for the sake of her son.”

  “I lost businesses and alliances because of what she did. If she didn’t come back pregnant, she could have been McAllister’s wife now. An
d my deals wouldn’t have gone sour. I’ve lost a couple of million dollars because of what she did!”

  “With all due respect, Uncle Edward, I think your daughter and your grandson are worth more than that. You just fail to recognize it.”

  Each word that came out of her father’s mouth was a hammer that smashed the pieces of her already crushed heart even more. And she couldn’t help wondering if her father loved her at all. Or did she not mean anything to him but a pawn he could offer to a richer family for alliances?

  There were further arguments in the room. She tried to make out the words they were saying.

  “I’m warning you, Justin!” her father was almost shouting. “Stop meddling with this family’s affairs! Respect your elders! Respect the way we discipline our children. Or you will start a family feud with what you’re doing!”

  The door suddenly opened and her father appeared before her. He was taken aback when he saw her standing at the door.

  She raised her chin to him, looking at him, while trying hard to hold back her tears.

  “Will you never learn to forgive me, father?” she asked in a broken voice.

  “If you know what’s good for this family, you will have the sense to do what’s right,” he told her in a low, stern voice. Then he walked away without another backward glance.

  Julianne was dumbfounded. How could her father feel so much hatred for her? She felt gentle arms wrap around her.

  “Oh my poor child,” Christine whispered to her. “Do not mind him. He’s always been stubborn.”

  “Are you alright, Ian?” Justin asked, his voice was full of worry for her. And Julianne’s heart broke even more because Justin was more concerned about her than the grave threats that her father gave him.

  “Do not mind him, Ian,” Jac said. “He’s being unreasonable. You know how he is.”

  “My sister doesn’t have a say in their marriage,” Christine sighed. “But it does not mean that she shares the opinion of her husband. I will speak to her when I get a chance.”

  “Do not worry, Ian. Many of our relatives do not agree with what Edward did to you,” Jac said.

  “Even Mason’s parents are proud of what he has become. They would forgive Mason in a heartbeat, if he asks for their forgiveness,” Christine informed her.

  “Thank… thank you. I love you all,” Julianne said in a broken voice. “I know you care for me and I will forever be grateful for that. But now, please… I need a moment to be alone.”

  Then she walked away to her room. She could barely hold it together. Her chest felt heavy. But she couldn’t cry. She wouldn’t.

  Justin was right. She had suffered a lot already. She didn’t want anything from her father. Just his forgiveness. And his acceptance of Jared. But it seemed that was impossible. Her father could be heartless if he wanted to.

  She stayed in her room for the rest of the afternoon. She didn’t want to face anybody. She was distraught, she could barely breathe. Even Adrienne couldn’t talk to her. She asked for space and they respected that. She needed time to think.

  By evening, she fed Jared in his room. Then she made sure he was tucked into bed. She tried her best to be jolly in front of her son. But deep inside, her heart was bleeding for him.

  He didn’t deserve this rejection at such an early age!

  As she watched Jared sleep, she realized that one of his grandfathers didn’t know he existed. The other one refused to acknowledge his existence.

  She leaned forward to kiss Jared on the forehead. He was a beautiful kid. He deserved so much better. And that was why she was working doubly hard. She wanted to give him the best. He wouldn’t lack for anything in life.

  When she returned to her room, it was already ten in the evening. The house was quiet. Everybody either retreated to their own chambers or in the game room having a drink and doubtless discussing about her father’s unlikely visit and the threats he left behind.

  In truth, her family’s wealth was only about a third of Justin’s. Her father didn’t stand a chance if he made good of those threats. But Julianne wasn’t sure she wanted to be the reason for the feud between their families. Her father may not be as rich as Justin, but he’s still worth at least a couple of hundred million dollars. That meant he could also afford firepower and an army.

  I’m not worth this fight! I can’t be the reason why this family will fall apart!

  She felt thankful for the love and the support she was receiving from the people around her. She felt heartbroken for the hatred her father still had for her. She felt scared of the feud she could spark between their families. Justin would be at the center of it and she couldn’t afford to ruin him after all that he’d done for her.

  What am I going to do?

  She has nowhere to go. And Jared could not be caught in the middle of these. He was too young, too innocent.

  When she came back to her room, she was surprised to find Jin sitting on her bed. He was wearing a white shirt and a pair of black drawstring pants. When he stood, she could make out the contours of his toned abs underneath his shirt, which momentarily took her mind off her problems.

  Then she shook herself back to reality. “What are you doing here?” she demanded. “Please! I’ve had a difficult day. I don’t have the strength to argue with you. Try me any other day.”

  Instead of bickering back, he stood up from her bed and said, “I’m not here to argue with you, ma belle.”

  “Then why are you here?”

  “You didn’t want to talk to anybody. Not even Adrienne.” His voice was serious, and she could tell he was being careful with his words.

  “And what makes you think I will talk to you?”

  “I won’t ask you to talk to me, either,” he said. When he looked at her, his expression was soft and gentle. She may be imagining it, because she could see the look of concern on his face. “I can tell that you could barely hold it, ma belle.” He shook his head. “You don’t have to say anything at all.” He held his arms open for her. “Come here.”

  It was like she was being magnetized. Her legs seemed to have involuntarily moved slowly towards him. When she was a few feet away from him, he snatched her into his arms and gave her a warm, comforting hug. Julianne closed her eyes and she let the tears roll down her cheeks. She cried. Finally!

  The last time she cried about her parents was when she delivered Jared and she realized they really weren’t going to change their minds about disowning her. She was young and alone. She had no clue about motherhood. She was having a baby alone. She needed at least her mother to be there for her, to teach her how to carry and care for her baby. But they didn’t come. Not for her. Not for her son.

  And after all these years, she thought she had learned to accept the fact that she was on her own, that she was no longer a part of her family. She would always have Gian but she’d lost both her parents. And if it was a choice between her parents and her son… well, she was sure of one thing. She would never abandon her son the way her parents had abandoned her. You do not give up on your kid. No matter what happened.

  She remembered her father’s last words to her.

  If she knew what was good for this family, she would do what was right. And she knew exactly what her father was talking about.

  Justin and Adrienne would never give her and Jared up. Her father had no power to ask them to send her away. And as long as she was in this family, her parents would never forgive Justin for helping her. If her father could not punish her, he would put pressure on Justin, on her Uncle Jac and her Aunt Christine. She would become the wedge that would drive this clan apart.

  Jin was right when he told her that she had made a mistake, and those mistakes have consequences. But now, she realized that nobody else had to suffer for it. Especially not Justin and Adrienne.

  She knew exactly what she had to do. The question is, would she have the courage to do it?

  Her father was specific about not wanting her to live here. He didn’t say anything abo
ut not wanting her to work for Adams Industries. She could keep her job there because the money was good and she needed it for Jared. But she couldn’t keep living here anymore. She would not make it difficult for Justin and her Aunt and Uncle.

  She felt Jin caress her head against his shoulder. He didn’t say a word. He just held her, provided her the comfort that she needed while she cried her heart out.

  For years, she had tried to be strong. And now, she allowed herself to be weak. She broke down and Jin was the person holding her together.

  Slowly, he bent down, picked her up and carried her to bed like she weighed nothing. He lay next to her and took her into his arms.

  “You don’t have to talk, ma belle,” he said. “You can cry all you want. You deserve to let it out. I won’t ask questions. But please let me hold you for a while.” She felt him kiss the top of her head. He caressed her arm gently. “You can be weak here in my arms. Hold on to me. I will be here as long as you need me.”

  Julianne was touched with the words he said. Contrary to what everybody was saying about him… Jin Starck had a heart after all. And right now, he was so much like the Jas Mathieu she met and fell in love with.

  How ironic, because in a way, she was in this situation because of him… because she chose him. She left him because she was scared of what her father and Patrick McAllister would do to him. She was protecting him. And now, she was protecting him again by not telling him the truth. She was shielding him from her family drama.

  And he thought I left him all those years ago because I chose another man. Because I cheated on another man with him. He thought he was just my last adventure before I married the man of my dreams.

  He didn’t know that I am in this situation because I chose to love him. Because even though I wasn’t free to promise my future to him, I gave him the one thing I was free to give then—my heart.

  16.

  Julianne had fallen asleep in Jin’s arms. When she opened her eyes, she realized that it was already five in the morning. It was dark in her room. Her head was still resting comfortably against Jin’s broad shoulder. He was sleeping quietly beside her.