I laughed and said I would consider it but I was not in a clothes shopping mood that evening. Nicole said she wanted to try a bunch of stuff and asked if I would mind looking around until she had found just what she was looking for. She said she would text me when she was ready for my opinion.
If Nicole was anything like she had been in high school this could take forever. I left and started browsing a store that seemed to specialize in New Age materials. When I walked in I noticed an athletic-looking girl at the counter with blonde hair styled like mine. Suddenly I got this cold shiver down my spine, I found myself checking her out! I had never really had those first-sight attractions to anyone, male or female, except of course for Mark years ago. Was I changing due to my relationships, or discovering who I really was? I was lost in thought when suddenly I found the clerk asking, “Hi, finding everything?”
I sort of stumbled on my words and let her know I was just looking. She noticed the photography book of the Cascades in front of me and asked if I was into nature photography. I looked at it and remembered the book my mom had given me from Mark. I sighed and told her, I just bought a new camera and plan on taking lots of pictures in the summer.” She smiled and asked, “Really? What type of camera do you have?” I told her and she looked at me with and excited expression before commenting, “That is the same one I have!” She then started talking about her hike up Mt. Hood she had taken the previous week.
She asked, “So are you a student?” I answered I was finishing my degree in psychology to which she again beamed back, “Wow, I am in my first year of college and I have to admit my general psychology class is my favorite!” I said, “That’s awesome! I am working on my masters.” She replied that she might consider doing the same. While we were talking I was analyzing the situation. She kept glancing over my body, was twisting her hair around and her voice had developed a more feminine tone than when she first approached me. I remembered what I had read about the eyes of a person who was interested in you – the pupils, even in bright light, dilate rather than contract. Her blue eyes seemed to betray her if that was indeed true. I suddenly received a text from Nicole, which broke the conversation and indicated Nicole was finished. When I said I had to go the young woman replied, “Oh...okay...but please wait a second” as she scribbled something on a piece of paper. She handed it to me – it was a home number and cell number. She asked, “Can you call me soon? I would really love getting together for coffee and discuss psychology.” I thanked her, and tucked the number away.
I was asking myself what was up at this point. Was every female in the Northwest gay or something, or was I sending out some weird signals? I searched my sub conscious for some answer but nothing I liked came out and hit me.
I noticed Nicole at the cash register of the clothing store. I joked that I had been asked on a date by some girl while she had been trying on clothes; but rather than the amusement I had expected she totally went insane! She started asking who she was, where I had talked with her, and then if I intended to go out with her. I said I had thrown away the number, which was a lie of course, and that the girl had just been window shopping at the same time as I. I also assured her I would not go out with anyone else – male or female. She then asked, “Even if he were some tall athletic guy with blonde hair and an IQ of 200?” I said the only thing he might be useful for was donation in the future, but certainly not for either romance or friendship.
When we got home I could tell she was still upset by the monotone, almost silent, way she would respond when I asked her a question. Just to get her mind off things I asked if in the morning we could discuss her idea of what she called “bait and shoot” from the movie. She smirked and looked at me, “Oh okay, sorry for being so jealous. I know you would never betray my trust.” She then asked me to hurry and join her upstairs – I sort of decided not to check my e-mails that evening for obvious reasons, yet even as I enjoyed the evening with Nicole I did wonder what Sara was up to right then.
The next morning I quietly got up to check my e-mails. Sara had sent something earlier the previous day. She asked when I would be up in Seattle next and asked if she could come down and visit. I said I would come up to Seattle maybe in a couple of weeks. I remembered what Nicole had said to me about trust as I sent a message back, “Love you Sara, looking forward to seeing you soon.” I guess I just did not want to risk ending what Sara and I had – I was worried Nicole might go back to her old ways of being on edge all the time. I could not live like that for the rest of my life, but I also could not see myself living without her.
Thinking about the issue of children I decided to do a little search on the internet. I checked the fertility clinic I had made donations to a couple of years earlier. Sure enough in the profiles of donors was, “MJ, 20 years old, healthy, Swedish, Irish background, auburn hair…” and then I noticed, “…multiple successful pregnancies” Wow, I thought by now I might be the biological mother of some children that were almost toddlers. I then searched for male profiles at another clinic. I found doctors, businessmen, grad students, professors, you name it. Their interests, favorite pastimes…it was all there. When I heard Nicole get up I called to her, “Hey Nicole, you have to see this.” She came down and looked over my shoulder. “See, you can be selective about fathers. She laughed, “My God, you mean you can basically shop for a child’s father on the net, how interesting.” I then suggested, “You know, two women could request the same donor. It would be the closest thing to having children the old fashioned way for a female couple.” Nicole sighed and gently bit my ear and whispered, “Nag, nag, nag.”
Nicole did say something that troubled me a little. She asked, “Melanie, when you look at men do you think about them being able to do for you what I cannot?” I straightened my back and said, “Of course not!” She nodded, “I guess I know that, please forgive me again. Right now I just want everything to work out.” I said I did too and I got up and held her in my arms. She asked if we could talk about her plan after breakfast and then escape to the mountains to visit some hot springs afterwards. It was cloudy and raining slightly outside which was perfect for a day in the water. She agreed and volunteered to go make breakfast while I showered.
When we were almost finished eating some delicious biscuits Nicole had fixed, she began to explain her idea in detail. We would find an area with a dangerous reputation and wait. We could trade off on who was bait and who was sniper until we were successful. I asked if she thought any neighborhoods would be good in Portland and she said that maybe Seattle would be better. I knew she was right, but I sincerely hoped we would not run into Sara when we went on our quest. I thought maybe we could also check out places Sara was not into, like more rugged nature areas nearby. As I was thinking, Nicole continued about how we could get wigs and try to look totally different than we normally did, just in case of any surveillance cameras. We could try out different locations each night until someone took the bait.
I thought the idea sounded good. I asked when she thought we should try the plan and she suggested after the July 4th holiday. She then surprised me when she said she had talked with her mom and that she wanted us to spend the 4th of July at her house. I told Nicole I was unaware she had been in contact with her mom and then she explained, “Oh Melanie, I have been on the phone lots of times. I have also called Daniel’s mom and played the part of the grieving widow quite well. His mom even asked if I needed some money yesterday.” I asked if she agreed to it, “Oh course! Who knows when I will receive my insurance money?” She also said, “As for my mom I have tried to create an image of an unbalanced girl who is only holding it together by being with you.” Apparently Nicole had a lot of people feeling sorry for her, but I would later discover that she had told her mom a few other things I wished to remain quiet at the time. It did not matter to me at the time however. We soon went off to the mountains and had a wonderful day hiking, only later to relax in the hot springs.
The weeks before the holidays were filled with h
ousehold improvements – her idea – coupled with excursions into nature; which I insisted upon. In those weeks I saw a really positive side of Nicole, not the moody, touchy girl in high school. We enjoyed our times together and only occasionally would Nicole poke me if she noticed I was staring at some family with kids. We studied the crime rates of Seattle and found the really bad areas. We planned this out carefully in case maybe two guys attacked. Nicole even tried her hand at artwork by copying gang insignia drawings. The only time I freaked out is when we drove up to Seattle to spend the day driving through three different locations. One time Nicole saw a young, blonde prostitute and commented, “Probably a Russian girl. You know Melanie, nobody would really miss her.” I reminded her that we were doing this plan at the moment and I did not want to discuss any other alternatives. She replied, “I know, but just think how much fun it might be later to pick up that girl and…” I interrupted, “Nicole, stay focused!”
When July 4th arrived I felt a bit uneasy visiting Nicole’s mom. I had expected Nicole to act all moody and depressed with her mom, but instead she was all giddy and happy. While I had expected tension between the two they instead worked together to get the meal finished on the BBQ. Soon she and her mom sat the table and laid out the food. Her mom then excused herself and disappeared into the house. Once she disappeared Nicole took the opportunity to steal a kiss. I asked, “What are you doing? What if your mom caught us?” She laughed, and said, “Oh don’t worry, my mom knows we are more than just friends, I told her last week. She was totally cool with it! However, she is the only member of my family I would ever invite to our wedding.” I asked, “Wedding?” like it was a surprise even though we had actually talked a few times about our future together. I just had to act surprised for the effect. Nicole took my hand and asked me to follow her to the side of the house. She held me as she looked in my eyes and said, “I look forward to doing everything in my power to show you how much I love you! My existence will be devoted to bringing you happiness.” We embraced and shared a long, passionate kiss. It was then I felt a completeness emerging in my life, especially as her mom opened the window next to us and called out, “Hey you two lovebirds, I only left to get the cake. Now come on and eat!”
The meal was so much more relaxed as Nicole sat next to me and her mom asked me all kinds of questions – the kinds a prospective mother-in-law might be expected to ask, like where we planned on living in the future. It dawned on me that she must have assumed we were engaged, which we technically were not. Even though I might have been happy at that moment, I felt a little trapped. After the socializing was over we returned to the house. I commented, “Your mother seems ready to plan a wedding for us.” Nicole smiled and, to my surprise, replied, “Oh, don’t mind her. We have plenty of time to sort these things out.”
It felt as if I should finally end my relationship with Sara, although I was reluctant to cut her out yet. Maybe I was so afraid of being lonely again that I dared not burn my bridges, so to speak. What would happen if I Nicole left me for some reason after I dumped Sara? Of course, I had been very careful with my e-mails to Sara. Here was Nicole practically taking me to a bridal show yet Sara had also mentioned spending our lives together. So did I look at Sara as a backup? I suppose I did. Nicole was committed to losing weight so when we returned home she went for a walk. I took the opportunity to check my e-mails. Sara had written a lot of times, but I had responded with a long, friendly and only somewhat passionate letter while Nicole was away.
Well, the day finally arrived for our experiment. Was my movie only a bit of Hollywood fantasy or would we run into some real crook? I knew things happened every day, you read about it in the news, but that might mean one incident here and one the next day in New York. You probably would have a greater chance of winning the lottery than getting attacked. It was worth a try though.
When we took off to Seattle we had planned on getting a room and then going out late in the night after most businesses were closed and people had gone to bed. What we had in mind was probably quite dangerous, but that only heightened the anticipation. We had decided to drive in Nicole’s car since it was older and might blend in to the surroundings better. We had put on wigs, fake glasses and applied make up to make sure we looked totally different than normal. We parked in an area near a liquor store.
We went to the park we had scoped out earlier in the week. Nicole and I looked around in the darkness and saw nobody out so we positioned ourselves. I sat on a bench and she hid in some bushes nearby. Time passed by slowly, interrupted only by the occasional screams of fighting cats, followed by dogs angrily barking in the distance. I felt so very alien to this environment and wondered what it must have looked like a century earlier – before the erection of buildings which were once fashionable but had long since succumbed to years of neglect. I was used to being poor growing up but this area was truly a monument to poverty and the decay of society. I was not only depressed by the environment, I was also ready to give up on the idea that our plan was going to yield any results. After about three hours of nothing happening Nicole emerged from the bushes and we took off. We repeated this the next evening with no results either, unless you count the drunk who urinated on a tree and then passed out.
The third night we staked out a park with lots of trees and a playground. Nicole went off behind some modern-art sculpture and hid while I sat on a swing…patiently waiting to see if this evening would bring any action. I had pretty much abandoned hope but after about two hours I suddenly heard voices in the distance, accompanied by the sound of someone knocking over what I thought was a garbage can. The voices were becoming louder and louder, closer and closer. I wondered how many guys were in this bunch, but I soon had the answer to that when their group finally appeared as they passed around the area thick with trees. I saw four men, or large teens, suddenly approaching the play area where I sat!
I was worried both about the numbers as well as the possibility of them all being armed. The last thing we needed was a shootout. Then the biggest guy, the one apparently leading this pack spotted me. The guy had a dark complexion. He had a headband and was wearing some sort of sleeveless vest. He motioned towards me, which caused them to all follow him as he strutted over to my location.
“Oh yeah, look what we have here! Some bitch I ain’t never seen around here before! A ho ain’t gonna get much business here in the park.” His friends laughed and one joined in the taunting, “Nobody that will pay!” I responded, “Hey guys, I am not a prostitute, my boyfriend and I got into a fight and he kicked me out of his car. Could you tell me where I can get a cab or bus around here to go home?” They all snickered to one another and started trading profanities. I clutched my gun under my purse anticipating what was going to happen next.
The leader came closer and introduced himself as Damien. He said he and his friends would be more than happy to help. Then he asked what they could expect in return. I said I would be very grateful and they all laughed. He said, “Maybe we can work something out. What do you have in that purse?” I answered in a shy manner, “Nothing, I left my wallet at home and only have a few dollars change.” The Damien character laughed and said money was not the only thing that could exchanged as he started to unbuckle his belt. I said maybe I should leave and began to stand up but two of the other guys rushed around Damien and each grabbed one of my legs and pulled so hard that I went flying out of the swing, landing on my back on the cold, hard ground! The impact hit my head so hard that all I could see for brief second all I could see was bight light. Maybe I was in a state of momentary shock but the words one of the guys yelled out brought me back to consciousness, “Gawd, the bitch is packing!” Just then I realized my purse had fallen to the side and the gun was exposed! I had a firm grip on the weapon however. I looked up in panic and saw that the guy to the leader’s right was reaching into his pocket. I instinctively went into a self-preservation mode and quickly aimed my gun at him, but as I pulled the trigger there was no movement! They
all flew back until I tried again to fire, but I could not get it to work!” I wondered where Nicole was in that second of terror. Suddenly they all stood and began to laugh as they cautiously approached me. I saw what the guy had been reaching for – a long knife! Then their leader, still laughing, told the others, “Stupid bitch!” and looked at me with total contempt, “Girl, you picked the wrong crowd to mess around with!” He pulled out a revolver just as his friends lunged toward me. Yet in that moment of terror, just after he blurted out his threat, I heard a muffled “pop” and the Damien guy’s left eyeball exploded. I then heard several more pops as I suddenly realized I had left the safety on. I quickly released it, took aim and shot into the torsos of these would-be attackers. Damien stumbled around, despite the head shot and who know how many other bullets entering him, fell to his knees and then collapsed onto his face. His comrades were all on the ground by then, at least two moving slightly with one coughing up blood and struggling to say something, but only managing gurgling sounds.
I had stood up as I fired my last round. I heard Nicole replace a clip in her gun as she ran over and fired two shots into the heads of each guy on the ground, starting with the one coughing up blood. Within seconds there was complete silence, except for dogs barking way off in the distance. I motioned to Nicole for us to leave but she countered in a hushed tone, “Just a second, you make sure you didn’t drop anything, I have something I have to do to add to the effect.” My purse was zipped up but I looked around anyway. I said I would retrieve the casings but Nicole said not to – she felt it had to look amateurish and there was no way to trace them back to us anyway.
Melanie's Awakening Page 12