Dissident

by Lisa Beeson

  He glowered down at her. Sennah could tell he was not pleased with Malu’s command to stay behind with her. From the hard lines of his face to the rigidness of his posture, everything about him screamed acrimony. Shocked by such unwarranted animosity, Sennah tried to search his eyes for intent, but he would not look directly into her eyes. It was as though their Ayan-ness offended him. Sennah knew that her mixture of Ayan and Daizan features were shocking at first, but no one at the temple had ever had such an aversion to them before. They usually had the opposite effect.

  She also knew of the deep-seated distrust and antipathy the Daizan held for the Ayans, stemming from the Great Galactic war, but that had nothing to do with her. She was just a child, with no more control over her parentage than anyone else was.

  Sennah couldn’t stop herself from asking, “Why are you angry with me, savan?” Using the informal word in his and Malu’s dialect for “beloved uncle”, hoping that he would see her as his niece and not just a strange child he had been burdened with. They were akin after all – they shared the blood of The Mother.

  His eyes locked with hers, unnerved by her use of the familial title. “I am not angry with you,” he answered with a guarded sternness.

  Finally able to read his intent, she saw that it was the truth. His anger was not directed at her, he was angry with Malu. She saw that beyond the anger was the fear she had felt in him when they had first arrived. He saw her as a threat. A threat to what, she had no idea.

  Malu had told her to show her uncles that they had nothing to fear from her, but why should that be her responsibility? They were the Highborn Magrah soldiers, why was it up to her, a small child, to alleviate them of their fears? It made no sense to her. Sure, her conception was illegal, but her parents truly loved each other, and no one knew of her existence except for those at the temple. As long as the High Sages granted her asylum, she was under the protection of the temple’s grant of neutrality. She was no threat to anyone.

  Then she saw it. In the moment before he glanced away from her intense scrutiny: the disgust. He thought she was an abomination.

  The realization was like a physical strike to her heart. The only family she has known, besides her parents, rejected her right to exist.

  Her chest constricted the breath from her lungs as tears threatened to flood her eyes. She was distantly aware of Rysura saying something to her, but she sifted away before she shamed herself in front of everyone.

  Though she loved moving like her Oan’s people, the ability to sift tired her immensely. She only sifted long enough to escape Vrahnon’s sight, then ran normally the rest of the way to the temple’s meditation garden – effortlessly navigating the corridors and eluding any who might see her tears and try to stop her.

  As soon as she entered the vast garden space, Sennah sensed that it was empty except for Ruhk sleeping peacefully in his hiding place. Making her way swiftly around the curved stone pathways meandering through the fertile rings of concentrically tiered meditation wells, she headed straight for the giant Hallow Tree. It grew at the bottom of the center meditation well. Foregoing the stairs to save energy, she jumped down from tier to tier, trying not to trample the fragrant plants in the sunken gardens.

  Once she reached the tree, it was hard for her fatigued body to climb up to the place where the trunk divided, forming a natural cradle. It was her favorite place to go when she wanted to be alone. Beams of sunlight refracted through the prismatic, crystalline leaves creating shimmering rainbows that danced all around her with the rhythm of the breeze.

  Forcing her shaky muscles to grasp, push, and pull herself up, she finally made it to the cradle and gave herself over to the fatigue, eager for a break from the heartache.

  When she woke some time later, she found Ruhk’s warm, smooth body wrapped around her with his head resting on her shoulder – his sleepy breaths puffing against her cheek. She hadn’t meant for her need to call him out from of his burrow under the weybohr bush. Now that he was here, however, she was glad for his company. She had come to love him greatly, much to Rysura’s consternation. She constantly felt the need to remind Sennah not to stunt his natural development with her attachment to him. That they hadn’t taken him in to be a pet, they had only saved him so that he would survive to fend for himself.

  Sennah thought back to when Ruhk had first hatched and had been able to fit in her hands. Rysura had chosen his name. It meant “the reach of the night wind” in her dialect, for his coloring was dark and he was practically soundless when he moved. She had sewn secret inner pockets in their clothing so they could take turns keeping his little body warm and secure against them as he grew. Now he was longer than Sennah was tall. Her heart gave a painful squeeze of remorse at the thought of letting him go out on his own. She knew it would be soon and she would miss him terribly, but she understood that he deserved to be free and live as he naturally would in the wild.

  Her stomach let out an angry growl loud enough to elicit a sympathetic response from Ruhk in his sleep. With a quiet giggle, Sennah kissed the top of his smooth head before she carefully extricated herself from his embrace.

  She wasn’t surprised to sense Rysura in the garden. She was using Nys’Ktaan so it was hard for Sennah to find her at first, but then she saw the murky outline of her xjaasa in the tall grasses on the top tier of a nearby meditation well.

  Sennah decided to use Nys’Ktaan also, attuning the frequency of her xjaasa with that of the Hallow Tree, finding solace with its serene ancient rhythms. She also didn’t want to be caught taking one of the manna fruit from its branches. The fruit was only supposed to be used for dire medical emergencies, due to its potent healing and rejuvenating properties. However, Sennah’s stomach was cramping painfully with emptiness, and she didn’t see the harm in taking one of the smallest ones, just this once. The branches of the enormous tree were abundant with the precious fruit. One tiny fruit shouldn’t be missed.

  Scrambling out on to one of the large sturdy branches, she reached out to pluck the smallest of the spongy fruits she could find. Sitting down on the branch and letting her little legs dangle freely, she eagerly bit into the juicy, white orb. Sweet nectar dripped down her chin and onto her fingers. It was so delicious that she could understand why they had to limit access to the supply. If they didn’t, it would all be gone in a matter of moments. As soon as she swallowed, she could feel an effervescence spread throughout her body. She finished the fruit in a couple eager bites, feeling guilty, but completely rejuvenated and more satiated than she ever had in her life. She couldn’t remember ever having anything more delectable, even in the Inbetween with her parents. They were always trying to one-up each other with their creations, pushing themselves to greater and greater feats.

  Licking the last sticky remnants from her fingers and around her mouth, she felt the blood bond even before recognizing Vrahnon’s presence enter the garden. Through the clear crystalline leaves of the tree she spied him under one of the surrounding arches, scanning the lush meditation wells with his fierce gaze.

  Sennah didn’t bother moving from her perch on the branch, she could tell that he only knew she was in the garden because of the blood bond. While using Nys’Ktaan, even if he did look her way, his gaze would pass over her as if she was part of the tree.

  “Child,” Vrahnon shouted in Common speech, causing Sennah to wince at the harsh loudness. “I know you are here. Reveal yourself.” His speech and his movements were quick, opposed to the slower rhythms of the Hallow tree. If the commotion Vrahnon was making wouldn’t undoubtedly call the unwanted attention of the Sages, she would have laughed at the absurdity of it.

  The Meditation Garden was a place of reverence and quiet reflection for the Sages and their acolytes. The acoustics engineered in such a way as to amplify the ambient sounds of the surrounding forest and the soothing susurrations of the waterfalls pouring from the lake off the plateau. A whisper could be heard throughout the whole garden, so a shout would be heard throughout the sur
rounding temple.

  She gave a nervous glance towards Ruhk. They had chosen the garden for him to hide in so he could hunt the pests at night and sleep during the day without being disturbed. She was relieved that the raucous noise made him only stir a moment and nothing more. She turned back in time to see Rysura rise from the tall grasses, abandoning using Nys’Ktaan. “Calm yourself and let the child be,” she demanded in a rapid, low tone as she swiftly marched towards the large Daizan soldier. “You have upset her enough for one day.”

  He hid his surprise at her sudden appearance behind a mask of indifference. “I have done nothing to her,” he insisted, lowering the volume of his voice to match hers, as he proceeded down the winding stone path.

  “If you knew her as I do, you would think otherwise,” she retorted as she moved to cut off his progress towards Sennah’s well.

  “This does not concern you, Xanarhii,” he said, moving closer to where he felt Sennah was in the garden.

  Without giving away Sennah’s location, Rysura deftly positioned herself between him and the well with the Hallow tree. “Everything about that child has been my concern since the moment she was put in my care as a babe. She is mine to guide and protect, you are unneeded here.”

  “If that were true my sister would not have had me stay. I am the child’s guardian now. She must learn to respect my authority and not run off and disappear without my consent.” He gazed down at Rysura with the haughty disdain of a Highborn. He made a quick, dismissive gesture for her to move out of his way, expecting her to submit to his authority as well.

  Undaunted, Rysura squared her shoulders and stood her ground. “I am not subservient to you, Magrah,” she spat out, making the title sound like an insult instead of a status of honor. She flared her nostrils as if his scent offended her. The Xanarhii could differentiate the scent of certain emotions, and she obviously didn’t approve of Vrahnon’s. “I am a proud Xanarhii warrior, baptized by blood. Your title does not intimidate me. My people shed the yoke of your race’s authority long ago, when we chose to leave Emuria. There are no self-appointed Higher Races here. Nann was granted the status of a neutral territory.”

  “Chose to leave? Your race was round up and banished to this moon when we grew tired of your barbarous ways. Do not rewrite history with the lies you tell yourselves,” he scoffed. “Frankly, I cannot understand why my sister would trust leaving a …child,” he balked, unwilling to speak the true word he meant to say, “with one of such a volatile race.”

  Knowing Rysura as she did, Sennah could see the amount of self-restraint she was using to keep her voice low and calm, and not tear Vrahnon apart. Rysura was fiercely prideful of her race and heritage and did not tolerate disrespect.

  “You are the one who lies to himself,” she ground out. “Your people destroyed our ancestral lands then forced us to abandon them to make room for the barbarians of your own race. The Xanarhii that chose to leave allowed themselves to be ‘round up’ and taken to Nann. You well know that they would not have been found otherwise.” Her hand swiped her cloak aside to reveal the dagger at her hip – her stance battle-ready. “And I will gladly show you just how volatile I can be if you continue to disrespect my people,” she said, her voice cold with menace.

  Vrahnon smirked in response to the threat. “I would like to see you try, Xanarhii. The Daizan are considered the Higher Race for a reason.” He stepped back, ready to begin the motions to summon the power of his xjaasa. Malu had said that the lethal art was called, Tahrunai.

  Rysura grabbed her dagger with exaggerated flourish, preparing to attack before he could concentrate his energy.

  Sennah abandoned Nys’Ktaan, allowing Rysura and Vrahnon to slow down and give her a chance to stop the impending violence. Rysura jabbed forward with the dagger in a feint, testing his reflexes and the weaknesses in his defense. Vrahnon pivoted easily away with a laugh of derision, obviously underestimating Rysura’s fighting skills. However, Sennah knew that Rysura’s next move would draw blood.

  “Stop,” Sennah shouted in panic. She climbed down to a lower branch so she could be seen clearly. “I am here! Please stop!”

  They both halted their movements and turned to stare at the tree, their expressions turning from surprise to horror. Sennah realized her mistake when she heard the savage hiss behind her. Ruhk was on the branch above her in full aggressive stance. He must have awakened during the argument and her panicked shouting had made him think she was in danger. Ruhk saw Vrahnon to be the threat – focusing all his ire towards the stranger.

  Vrahnon immediately ran past Rysura towards the edge of the Hallow Tree’s meditation well. “Move away, child,” he shouted, switching the focus of his movements towards Ruhk.

  Sennah quickly realized that the exchange between Vrahnon and Rysura had been nothing more than ego and bluster, for the sweeping movements of his arms and quick gestures of his hands were sharper and dramatically more combative.

  Ruhk sensed the threat of the luminescent energy forming around Vrahnon’s hands. He began bearing and gnashing his sharp teeth in warning. Both the man and the syviathun were prepared to destroy each other trying to protect Sennah from the other.

  Memories of teeth, claws, and tearing flesh bombarded Sennah’s senses. She glanced to Rysura in appeal. Rysura gave a quick tilt of her head in understanding, before she ran over and used her shoulder to knock into Vrahnon’s side, effectively breaking his concentration and dissipating the luminescent energy.

  Sennah reached up to the higher branch and managed to place her fingertips on one of Ruhk’s back feet. Ruhk was a highly intelligent creature, but because they could not communicate verbally, Sennah had learned to send him visual images laced with emotions. She immediately joined their xjaasai and channeled feelings of calmness and safety into him. When Ruhk began to relax his posture, she conveyed to him that Vrahnon was not a threat. Ruhk shot back with thoughts of the harsh sounds and threatening gestures he witnessed Vrahnon making towards them.

  Ignoring Vrahnon’s protests, Sennah climbed up onto the same branch as Ruhk so she could place her forehead against the top of his head – making the connection stronger. She then tried to convey that Vrahnon’s heart and mind were confused by fear, but ultimately he wanted what was best for her. Vrahnon would not harm them; she would make sure of it. Vrahnon was her family, so Ruhk shouldn’t harm him either.

  Ruhk still did not want to trust Vrahnon. His instinct was to attack, bite, and rip into Vrahnon’s flesh to protect his “vlek”, or family unit. He began drooling in anticipation of the taste of it. However, his desire to please Sennah overrode his impulse to attack. Ruhk sat back on his haunches in grudging capitulation, though he was still hyper-aware of Vrahnon’s every movement.

  “Sen,” Rysura said in a quiet, gentle tone, causing Sennah to turn away from Ruhk. “It is time, pakiue. He can no longer stay inside the temple grounds.”

  No matter the pain it caused in her heart, Sennah knew that it was the truth. It was too dangerous for him to stay. “Yes, jahtiue,” she whispered softly. Tears spilled from her eyes as she placed her head against his once more. With a heavy and reluctant heart, she showed him images of Rysura taking him down into the low forest. She showed him hunting and living with other syviathuns, lacing the images with feelings of liberation, acceptance, and a sense of belonging to a new vlek.

  He shot back with an image of him, Rysura, and Sennah, laced with affection and stubbornness. They were his vlek. They should not part ways.

  Sennah showed him images of her and Rysura visiting him as he thrived in the forest where he belonged. She showed him her memory of how brave and beautiful his mother was. Then she let him know that he would always be family, but he was grown now, and he had to go out on his own.

  Rysura made a clicking sound to call him to her. Sennah gave him one last image of him going to Rysura, laced with love, before breaking the connection.

  He made a disgruntled grunt of protest, before climbing down the tre
e and making his way over to Rysura. He clacked his knife-like teeth together at Vrahnon in warning as he passed by, then he carefully climbed up onto Rysura’s back and shoulders, wrapping himself around her like a second cloak.

  Thanks to the garden’s acoustics, as Sennah climbed down from the tree, she heard Rysura say to Vrahnon in a hushed tone, “She is far nobler and intelligent than any child I have ever known. Master your reactions to fear and uncertainty before you force her to do something we will all regret.” She turned away and stealthily took off before he could respond.

  There seemed to be something Rysura and Vrahnon were hiding from her – a word they were reluctant to say. It made Sennah feel uneasy in the pit of her stomach. Rysura had never kept anything from her before. At least she had thought that was so.

  After watching Rysura leave, Vrahnon turned to look down at Sennah as she approached. His eyes were full of confusion, fear, and cautious fascination. He wanted to know how she was able to have control over such a savage creature.

  He didn’t understand that it wasn’t control, it was affection, respect, and consideration. She realized then, that his problem was possibly not with her, it was his issues over control. His fear took over when he didn’t feel in complete control of a situation. It made some sense to her now. His life was dedicated to keeping the bloodline safe, and being in control of himself and those around him, helped him do the job he was born to do. However, she still did not understand why he feared her so much.

  Sennah didn’t bother wiping away the tears still streaming down her face. She was tired of being strong. In the span of a day, she’d had to deal with the departure of both her mother and her best friend. Vrahnon could deal with her tears. “I am ready to submit to your guidance, savan. But please, help me understand why you fear me?” She held up her little hand to prevent him from objecting. “Do not deny it, I can read it in your eyes.”