A Thrill of Hope

by Marie Higgins

  “Oh, really?” Holly cocked her head. “Is that why you took the team to nationals your senior year?”

  “But I wasn’t the only player on the team. We had a great team, which is why we went to nationals. I wasn’t that great, I promise.”

  Holly took another bite as she studied him. He looked mighty good in his goatee, which was slightly fuller today. He wore a brown and blue plaid shirt with dark blue jeans, and dang, if he didn’t look good in that department, too. Dare she say... perfect?

  “Then tell me, Rafe, what do you think is your worst flaw?”

  The humor slowly left his face as he stared into her eyes. Her heart dropped. Maybe she shouldn’t have asked that question. Whatever it was couldn’t be good if his mood changed that drastically. Now she wished she hadn’t even approached the subject.

  RAFE HATED FEELING inferior in front of women, and to admit his weakness was something he really didn’t want to do – especially to Holly. But he wasn’t a man who went around lying, either.

  “I’m not very good at making a commitment.” Relationships, in particular.

  “Now, that’s not true.” Georgia tapped his hand and shook her head. “Every time you tell me you will do something for me, you’ve done it. And, don’t forget, you made it through college and medical school. That, right there, is a huge commitment.”

  He gritted his teeth, wishing Georgia hadn’t pointed out those things. “True, but when it comes to long-term commitment, I... hesitate.”

  Mrs. Kidman stared at him for a few awkward moments, before her eyes widened. “Oh, do you mean with women, and relationships? Is that why you’re not married yet?”

  Inwardly, he groaned. Holly’s gaze dropped from his face and rested on the few bites of apple pie remaining on her plate. Uncomfortable silence passed between them, and he fished for a way to answer Georgia’s question without looking like a complete idiot. Unfortunately, his mind was only filled with seaweed.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Holly broke the silence. “That flaw belongs to most of us who are career-minded.”

  Ease settled over him, but along with it came shock. Why would she try to help him out? He shouldn’t question, just accept her kindness.

  He sighed heavily and pushed away from the table. “Well, lovely ladies, I need to get going.” He focused on Georgia. “I’m very happy that you’re doing much better, and that your daughter is here to help you.” He switched his attention to Holly. “And I hope to hear from you soon about when we’ll get started. I’ll get one of the guest rooms ready for you, too. Just come on over whenever you’re ready.”

  “Thanks, Rafe.” She stood. “I really appreciate your help.”

  They walked to the front door. He opened it before turning to look into her brilliant green eyes again. “And let me know if there is anything else you need me to do.”

  “I will.”

  Rafe headed to his truck with a song of hope in his heart, and a bounce in his step. The more he thought about being with Holly, his sorrow for losing Katie moved farther out of his thoughts. Now he just felt guilty for staying with a woman he truly didn’t love.

  At this moment, he didn’t know if he would fall in love with Holly. Did anyone ever know they were going to fall in love? But he had a bigger problem than trying to decide which woman would be in his life.

  Luca.

  Luca had a crush on Holly. How could Rafe have feelings for her when his cousin was experiencing the same infatuation? Luca had a harder time finding women who liked him. In fact, they found him creepy. Perhaps Rafe’s cousin was a little strange. However, Rafe didn’t want to upset him. It was bad enough that Luca had to deal with the possibility of finding another job, and another home.

  Rafe drove to the lumber store, parked his truck, and went inside. As he searched for the tools he’d need, Christmas music played in the background. He smiled. This year, he’d try to make it the best Christmas they ever had.

  He grabbed a cart and pushed it around the store, taking the things he needed, whistling to the music. His heart was light, and he blamed it on Holly. He still didn’t know what it was about the woman that could make his mind twirl in circles like a kid spinning around. Fourteen years ago, she was just a kid. She was his brother’s age, so why would he think of her any differently? But that kiss in the prop room... Although he didn’t want to admit it, he’d thought about it for weeks after that first kiss. He couldn’t believe she was only twelve, and yet, he thought she’d been a pretty good kisser back then.

  And now... she was still a great kisser.

  Grinning, Rafe shook his head and moved to the next aisle. He’d told her once that fate was throwing them together. He realized that wasn’t far from the truth. Why else would she stay on his mind constantly? Why else would he want to see her every minute of the day?

  But in the weeks ahead, he’d be able to work closely with her. He hadn’t been this excited about something since... since... He stopped, trying to think of when he’d been this excited. It had definitely been quite some time.

  It was Holly Kidman who had his heart beating with enthusiasm. Cute little Holly, with the kissable lips, the dreamy green eyes, and the one woman – besides Georgia – who was made for Christmas cheer.

  “Rafe?”

  The woman’s familiar voice brought him out of his wistful thoughts and he snapped his attention up the aisle. Standing, only five feet away, was the woman he’d recently hurt. The woman he should have never hurt. A frown creased her face as she looked at him. His heart tugged painfully, knowing he was the reason.

  “Hi, Katie. How are you?”

  She gave him a one-shoulder shrug. “I’m in town visiting with my parents.”

  How stupid was he to forget her father owned the lumber store? “I’m sure they are enjoying the visit.”

  She nodded. “I... I didn’t tell them what happened between us.”

  “You didn’t?”

  “No. Only because I needed to think about it first.”

  He took a step toward her. “What do you need to think about?”

  Liquid filled her eyes, and she blinked rapidly. “Us. What my feelings are for you.”

  A knot formed in his throat. “I thought you told me you never wanted to see me again.”

  “I was upset... and shocked... and humiliated. What else did you want me to say?”

  “I understand.” He stepped closer. “You never gave me time to explain, or apologize. You’re right, though. There really wasn’t anything I could explain that would make what I did right. You were my girl, and... what I did was wrong.”

  “Who is she? You know, the woman you were kissing.”

  “She’s Georgia Kidman’s daughter, Holly.”

  Katie shook her head. “When I moved to Timberland, Georgia’s daughters had already moved out of town. I never knew her.” She inhaled deeply and slowly released it. “Did you used to date her?”

  He chuckled softly. “No, although I was her first kiss. She is Steve’s age.”

  She lifted a judgmental eyebrow. “Please explain that comment.”

  “Long story short, I thought I was meeting my girlfriend in the prop room at the old theatre when I was seventeen. Holly was there, instead. I thought she was my girlfriend. It was dark. I kissed her.”

  Folding her arms, she tilted her head, eyeing him warily. “Do you make it a habit of kissing other girls when you have a girlfriend?”

  Shame washed over him. “No, although if you look at it, you’d think that’s what I do.”

  “Are you um... going to see her again?”

  He nodded, trying to study her expression. It appeared that she might forgive him, but even though he didn’t want her hating him, he also didn’t want to be with a woman he couldn’t commit to, either.

  But, could he break her heart twice?

  NINE

  Rafe shifted from one foot to the other as he tightened his fingers around the handle of the cart. His mind scrambled to find the
right words to say to Katie. He didn’t want her hating him.

  “Holly will be assisting her mother with the Christmas program this year. Holly wants to make this into a movie.” He cleared his throat softly. “And, she wants to film it at my ranch, which means—”

  “Which means,” Katie continued for him, “she’ll be at your house day and night until after the filming.”

  He nodded.

  Katie glanced around them as though looking for someone. Probably her father, but Rafe couldn’t be sure.

  “Do you have feelings for her?” Katie asked in a lower voice.

  Releasing a pent-up breath, Rafe pushed his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know what it is about her, but she’s fascinating. Ever since I first ran into her the day of the storm, I’ve not been able to get her off my mind.”

  Tears spiked Katie’s eyes and she dropped her gaze to her hands. “I see.”

  “Katie,” he said, touching her arm gently. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. But, since it has, I’ve been thinking really hard about us... about why I couldn’t fully commit to our relationship.”

  She lifted her gaze just as a tear slid down her cheek. “And what have you realized?”

  “It’s all me. I’m not ready to commit to anything. Perhaps it’s because I don’t truly know what I want out of life. But I do know one thing.” He stepped closer to her. “I don’t want you to wait for a man like me. You deserve so much better. You need a man who will love you wholly, and who will give you everything you deserve.”

  With the tip of her gloved finger, she wiped away the tear. “Do you know what’s funny about all of this?”

  “What?”

  “I’ve been spending a lot of time with one of the other teachers at my school. He’s divorced and has a small child. I’ve been confused about my feelings for him. I hoped that spending Thanksgiving with you would help me decide which one of you I had the strongest feelings for, and who I wanted to be with.”

  Rafe recalled hearing another man’s voice in the background when he talked to Katie on the phone the other day. “Was this man in your room when you called me?”

  “Yes.”

  Rafe nodded. “Well, it looks as though fate is trying to help you out, too.”

  “Possibly.” She sighed and straightened her shoulders.

  “Katie, I want you to be happy. I’m sorry for wasting two years of your life. I shouldn’t have strung you along all this time. Forgive me?”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “That’s all I ask.” Rafe smiled, but not fully. “I’ll miss all of the crazy times we had.”

  “Me, too.”

  “Good luck with the other school teacher. I’m sure he’ll realize how incredibly special you are.”

  She gave him a smile. “Thanks.” She wiped her wet cheeks. “And I wish you luck with the movie-producer.”

  “Thanks.”

  Katie turned and walked back up to the front of the store. Rafe’s heart didn’t feel as heavy now. He was relieved they could part as friends. Now the next big test would be to see what could happen with Holly.

  It didn’t take him long to gather up everything he needed, pay for the items, and load them in his truck. Now that he’d gotten one obstacle out of his way, he should figure out how to tackle the next obstacle.

  Luca.

  Rafe drove home. Leaving the supplies in his truck, he entered the house. Luca was sitting in front of the television, playing a video game. If his cousin was going to gain some kind of success in his life, he needed to tear himself away from the computer games a little more.

  “Hey.” Rafe sat on one of the brown, leather recliners. “I need to talk to you.”

  Luca threw him a scowl. “If it’s about selling the ranch, I don’t want to hear it.”

  “No, it’s not about that.”

  Luca played on for a few more seconds before clicking a button for the game to pause. He turned toward Rafe, giving him an impatient expression.

  “For the next few weeks,” Rafe began, “we are going to have some guests at our house. I want you to promise me that you won’t get in their way.”

  Luca rolled his eyes. “Why are they going to be staying with us?”

  “Because they will be making arrangements to have the Christmas program here at the ranch. And... they will be doing rehearsals and filming.”

  “Filming? Like making a movie?”

  “Yes.”

  Slowly, Luca’s eyes widened. “Is it Holly Kidman?”

  “Yes.”

  Luca jumped to his feet, dropping the game remote to the floor. “Are you kidding? This is going to be great. I’ll help her with anything.”

  “Actually,” Rafe stood, giving his cousin a stern stare, “you’ll not get in Holly’s way at all. I don’t want anything to disturb her. She’s here to make her first movie, and I don’t want you to become a hindrance.”

  Luca scowled as he bent and retrieved the game remote. His long, brown hair swept in his eyes. “Stop treating me like a little kid. I’m a grown man.”

  Rafe arched a judgmental brow. He glanced at the game remote in Luca’s hand and shook his head. “You’re a grown man? Then start acting like it.” He stepped closer to his cousin. “If you want Holly to see you as a man and not an adolescent, then I suggest you start doing things differently when she’s here. Take on more responsibility around the ranch, for one, and stop playing those kid’s games.” He paused, thinking if he needed to add anything else. “And, stop stalking her. One sure way to have women dislike you is to stalk them and become annoying. Do you understand?”

  “Yes, Father,” Luca said sarcastically, putting down the remote.

  Rafe pointed a finger at him. “I mean it, Luca. Holly is here for one thing only, and it’s to make her movie. This is her dream, and I’m not going to let anything stop her.”

  “I won’t either. Whether you want to believe this or not, I like her. A lot.”

  “Yes, I know. I also know you can be rather annoying with your advances. This is the very reason I’m warning you to back off.”

  Luca held up his hands in surrender. “I’ll be on my best behavior.”

  “You’d better.”

  Rafe turned away and walked back out to the garage to unload the supplies. He’d given his cousin the warning, and yet at the same time, Rafe couldn’t be in Holly’s face all the time. That wouldn’t look very good at all. He needed to allow her to work and get the film made. Then, and only then, could he see if she held any feelings for him.

  Sad thing was, he wasn’t very patient at all.

  HOLLY STOOD BY A WHITE-board, writing down some of the things she needed to get started. As she wrote camera, she chuckled and quickly pulled her cell phone out of her pants pocket and dialed Ivy’s number.

  “Hello?” Ivy answered on the third ring.

  “Hey, this is Holly.”

  “Holly? My sister?”

  Holly chuckled. “Yes, of course.”

  “Wow. What a shock this is. You don’t usually call me out of the blue unless...” Ivy inhaled sharply. “Is Mom all right?”

  Holly moved to the window, parted the curtains and peered outside. “Mom is fine. Everything is fine. I just need to ask you for a favor.”

  “Hmm... a favor, huh? Now you have me intrigued.”

  “Oh, wait. It’ll get better.” Holly grinned. “I’ll be starting my very first movie, and I want you to film it.”

  Ivy gasped. “Are you kidding me?”

  “Nope. The props for the Christmas program were destroyed by the leaking roof, and so we are going to have it at the Montgomery ranch, using their animals, and their old-fashioned barn. Rafe agreed that we could film it there.”

  “Now I know you’re joking. Why would you, of all people, want to work alongside Rafe Montgomery?”

  Holly tightened her fingers around the phone. So far, nobody in town had mentioned the episode with Rafe fourteen years ago. Leave it to her o
wn sister to bring up bad memories.

  “Ivy, I’ve forgotten all about that. It’s all water under the bridge now. I would think that my sister would forget about it, too.”

  “Sorry.” The lively tone to Ivy’s voice disappeared as remorse filled her voice.

  “Anyway,” Holly quickly said, “what do you think? Will you come and help me? Mom’s already assigned the parts, and she’ll be making the costumes. Rafe and his cousins will build some props. All I need is a cameraman... or camera lady.”

  There was a pause on Ivy’s side, and Holly hoped her sister wasn’t thinking of a way out of this. Holly and Ivy hadn’t been the closest sisters growing up, but she still hoped Ivy would help her out this time.

  Holly moved away from the window and back to the white-board. She picked up the black marker and wrote makeup-artist, and hairdresser.

  “I’m looking at my schedule,” Ivy finally answered, “and I’m pretty booked with tests at school, and of course, work. However, I could still help out, but I won’t be available until you are ready to start shooting. So you’ll need to let me know what days you want to film, and I’ll be there.”

  Sighing with happiness, Holly sank onto her bed. “Thanks so much, Sis. I think if we had a week of rehearsals, we should be ready to shoot. Of course, we’ll need to get everything set up first, and then have everyone come for rehearsals. But I really think we can film within two or three days. Don’t you think?”

  “Oh, definitely.”

  “Thanks, Ivy. You have no idea how much I appreciate this.”

  “Well, don’t be surprised if I come to you, asking for the favor to be returned.”

  Holly laughed. “I’ll gladly help you out.”

  “And when you become rich and famous,” Ivy continued, “don’t be surprised if I ask you for a loan.”

  Holly gave a loud snort. “Don’t be expecting me to do that.”

  “Okay, good-bye. Chat later.”

  “Good-bye, Ivy.”

  Once she ended the call, she returned to the white-board, making notes about items she needed. Excitement grew inside of her, and she couldn’t wait to get started. How soon should she and her mother move into the ranch temporarily? Would tomorrow be too soon?