Almost Official

by Ruby Reade

  'What?' I ask walking past them all to the sink.

  'Once you finish getting ready then we can go, I've got my mascara from Dior if you want to borrow it.' Kate offers trying the softly, softly approach for the first time in her life and I half smile to myself at her effort.

  'Yeah you need to do something before I am going to be seen in public with you looking like that.' Jenny pulls apart the last shred of my self-confidence without any real thought.

  'Jenny, be nice.' Mum tells her before the comment is barely finished. 'Lucy, what I think she is trying to say is you look a little tired.' A little tired? You try having the kind of night I have and see how fresh any of you wake up.

  I walk out into the hallway and take a closer look at my face. After thoroughly examining myself, then a little tired, could be an exaggerated compliment. Without another word to anyone, I go upstairs leaving them all sitting in silence.

  ***

  It is a mere forty minutes later, and I have got to give it to her, Jenny is a miracle worker. I don’t know if she came upstairs to take pity on me, or because Mum sent her. Either way, after seeing the result I don't care what the reason was.

  Now sitting in The Purple Palace with a large glass of Merlot and all my girls around me, I feel more like myself again.

  'So, what we all want to know is how you managed to get into yet another complicated pickle, and the all important question, which one is better in the sack? Drew or Kevin?' Laura asks getting straight to the dirt. Leaning forward clutching her JD and coke she looks so eager that I burst out laughing.

  'Wow, sounds like they were both pretty shocking then.' Kate says raising an eyebrow at me sipping an orange juice.

  'Well to be fair to Drew I don't know how it happened and can barely remember any of our dirty little act, so I can't really comment on his bedroom abilities. I can say that if he is as good at sex as fighting, then he was probably rubbish bless him.'

  'Oh dear, so not a repeat performance then?' Jenny asks her first question on the subject.

  'One hundred percent, no.' I shake my head firmly and take another gulp of wine to help banish the thought.

  'So, if this was all unplanned, then how exactly did you end up in his bed working up a sweat?' Kate quizzes me. I drain the last of my wine in preparation.

  'Drew asked me how things were going with me and Kevin and obviously knew something was up when I burst into tears in the middle of the high street.' I half laugh playing with the long stem of my empty glass.

  'Then what?' Jenny prompts me. I look at all their faces staring at me, waiting, and I feel like I am standing before the panel of judges at BGT. Jenny would have to be Simon. All she is missing is the buzzer.

  'We ended up going to his while I ranted and consumed three bottles of wine to myself and he listened, drinking tea. He is the complete opposite of Kev. I think that’s why it happened, I just needed someone who was besotted with me.' I shrug and check my nails to avoid their reactions.

  'But surely you must have wanted to sleep with him a little bit otherwise it wouldn't have mattered how drunk you were. It wouldn't have happened.' Kate says scrunching her nose up, obviously trying to work it out in her head.

  'He is a fitty though.' Laura says when I don't reply.

  'There is that, but I think it was more of a way to get back at Kev for Amy. I know that is really cruel on Drew but as I said I was drunk and not at my most intellectual.'

  'Seriously Lucy sort it out, neither of them is worth it.' Jen is back on her soap box, ' Kev was with you for two years but there was no commitment, and Drew, well, he fucked his best mate over, what else can I say.' She holds her hands up silently accepting the applause she hears in her head.

  'All I know is what Kevin said to Luke earlier.' Kate grabs all our attention instantly.

  'I bet he called me all the names under the sun.' I predict. I sit back in my seat and look at her waiting for her to get it over with.

  'Apparently, he is waiting for you to apologise. He is blaming Drew and moving out. Currently to our sofa.'

  'Argh. Great, now I feel even worse.' I drop my head into my hand rather than banging it repeatedly on the table. 'Do you think there is still a chance?' I ask Kate closing my eyes and keeping my head down.

  Jen jumps in, 'Oh for goodness sake Lucy it's time to lay the corpse to rest and move on.' Harsh but true I guess. Whatever, it certainly shuts Kate up.

  'Same again mate.' Jenny shouts at the barman.

  'Not for me babes, I've got to make a move.' Laura air kisses everyone before running out of the door before we can even say goodbye.

  'What is her problem?' Jen asks me and Kate.

  'No idea, she has been acting a bit weird though these past few weeks.' I say but shrug it off. If it was anything important then she would say something to at least one of us.

  'Do you think she is having an affair with someone she shouldn't be?' Kate asks, always thinking something overly complicated.

  'No I don't think that.' I say trying to stop her imagination running wild.

  'You must have noticed though that every time we talk about men, she clams up and disappears.' Kate draws the last word out and nods to us both.

  'It still doesn't explain it. She would tell us if she met someone.'

  'I've got it.' Jenny says me bouncing on her chair.

  'Come on then, oh fount of wisdom.' I say folding my arms and lean back in my chair to scowl at her.

  Luckily, my phone ringing saves me from hearing Jenny's solution. I hunt around in my bag while people on the tables around us start huffing and looking over. I start dumping everything on the table in an effort to get to it, and Kate and Jen get involved as well. Jen finally locates it and accepts the call before passing it to me. I grab it and answer before checking who is on the other end. Big mistake.

  'Hello. Hello?' I check to see if it is still connected and I see Drew's name on the screen.

  'Lucy.' His voice sounds a million miles away. I slowly put the mobile back to my ear aware of Jen and Kate watching me.

  'Hi Drew,' I force myself to speak.

  'What is he saying?' Jenny demands getting as close to the phone as possible. I try to bat her away because I am now missing everything myself, as I try to move sideways Kate glues herself to my other side making it impossible to move.

  'Sorry Drew, what was that?' I ask.

  'Where are you?' He asks again.

  'Oh, the Purple Palace with the girls.' I answer.

  'I can't hear.' Kate says shoving her head in front of my face. I stop listening again for a second to appreciate the expensive smelling shampoo Kate uses.

  'Would you get off me.' I hiss that them, covering the phone with my hand.

  '...so, what do you think?' I catch the end of Drew's question.

  'I think, that, sounds great.' I answer not knowing what to say, I can't ask him to repeat himself again.

  'What sounds great?' Jen demands of me, but I ignore her and wait for his response.

  'Wow, that is just the best news I have heard in a long time. Do you think you could love me back?' And that is the point I wish I would die. How I end up in such spectacularly bad situations with such ease I do not know.

  'Excuse me?' Finally comes out.

  'Hey, I said I love you, and do you think there is a chance you could ever love me back?' He says very loudly in my ear. Kate gasps and jumps back into her seat. She has clearly heard enough.

  'Oh.' Is all I can come up with. Jen is still clambering all over me trying to find out what is going on.

  'Lucy?' He tries for an answer.

  'So you looooooove me?' I ask laughing trying to lighten the mood. Jen falls off my lap taking several empty glasses bouncing onto the carpet along for the ride. Instead of replying he hangs up.

  'What? What did he say?' Jen dares to ask frozen where she landed.

  'He hung up on me.' I say relief and guilt washing around in my belly along with a hefty dose of bile.

  '
Yes, but what did he say on the phone?' She asks me again looking back at Kate who hasn't moved either, prone to her chair, hands covering her mouth.

  'He said, he loves me. I cannot believe he said that to me. I do not need this right now.'

  'Oh my god, what a Muppet.' Kate finally moves her hand and is laughing.

  'I am so pleased you find this so hilarious.' I say chucking my phone onto the table.

  'What was he thinking?' Jenny asks heaving herself up and onto the chair in one move.

  'He wasn't thinking, that is just it. We are in a situation and he has reacted to it without any thought process as men do. I really do not need this right now.'

  'Has it made you think though? Him asking that?' Kate wants to know.

  'No, no because I don't love him and I know I never will, I just have to work out how to tell him that without sounding like a heartless bitch and making the problem worse.'

  '...cy? Lucy are you still there? I can't hear you properly.' Drew's voice floats over from the table making us stare at it before looking at each other.

  Time stands still.

  Horrified I jump up and cancel the call cutting him off.

  'He. Hadn't. Hung. Up. He was still there.' I wail at the girls.

  'No, no, no, no, nooooo.' Jen's eyes look like someone is ripping them from her skull.

  'What did we say, oh piss it. What do you think he heard?' I ask officially freaking out.

  'Okay, hang on a second, stop worrying. He said he couldn't hear properly. We just need to backtrack what was said and try and guess at what he potentially heard us saying.' Kate says trying to be rational. It works for a split second until my phone rings again.

  'Hello.' I try to stay as calm as possible, in reality, I sound like a chipmunk on helium.

  'What happened there?' He asks. 'We were talking one minute and the next I could hear a mumble of voices but then it cut off.' I let out a deep breath.

  'Signal, it must have been the signal in here.' I turn around, so I don't have to face Jen and Kate laughing at me. Why am I such a dumbass?

  'Right, so anyway, I just needed to tell you how I felt again, I want you to be clear in your head about my intentions towards you.' He tells me.

  'What? That you love me?' I ask before engaging my brain.

  'Yes Lucy, is that so hard to believe?' He asks.

  'Sorry but I really have to go.' I say and end the call before he can protest.

  'So?' Jenny enquires.

  'So let's get out of here.' I say getting up and starting to walk towards the door without looking back. I keep checking my phone every five seconds to make sure it hasn't magically reconnected again, and I am scared to speak.

  I knew I shouldn't have left the house today, I am going to go home and climb straight back into bed, and from tomorrow things are going to change. They must.

  Chapter 26

  Kevin

  I look down at my knuckles still covered in scabs two weeks later. My temper flares up again, only muted by the thought of Drew's face so mashed up that it is unrecognisable. He'll get his. He will definitely get his, I'll see to that.

  I am still astounded she picked him over me. It is doing my head in and I can't help but think that there was something going on between them before even though I know that it didn't. Every night I lay down my head keeps going around and around, replaying over and over each time I remember them being together, trying to picture any looks or hidden flirting. I am going insane.

  Picking up my phone, I toy with the idea of calling her, begging her to change her mind. I want to tell her that even if she doesn't stay with me, not to choose him because he isn't right for her. No, fuck it. What am I saying, of course I want her back. We belong together. I press the call button next to her name before I change my mind.

  'Hello?' I panic when she answers and cancel the call. Prick.

  With a dry mouth, I press the call button again. The phone connects but she doesn't say anything this time, waiting for me I guess. This was a bad idea.

  'Kev.' I disconnect the call again when she says my name.

  I toss the mobile onto the desk and slump forward. I am a bitch. She should be the one chasing me. She must have realised by now that all of this is down to her, I mean when she sits there and looks at it all logically and calmly, there is no other explanation. Maybe that is why she answered? I lean back into the chair trying to get comfortable and promise myself that I must find a new place to stay other than Luke's sofa before I become permanently crippled.

  My phone rings and vibrates from my desk, flashing Lucy's name at me. I am the man. I am in the right. 'Hello.'

  'You rang me.' She states down the phone like a copper waiting for me to explain myself.

  'Erm, did I? oh, sorry, it must have been by mistake.' I say caught on the back foot.

  'What? Twice? You rang me twice by mistake?' I can almost see her frowning down the phone at me.

  'Yeah. Yeah it must have been,' I calm down warming to my story. 'It was in my pocket. I must have unlocked it and the bloody thing has been ringing people whilst I have been walking about.' I smile happier that I am not coming across as desperate.

  'Oh.' Is all she says.

  'Right,' I answer gabbing at my hair silently willing myself to say something else.

  'How is your hand?' She asks. This is a good sign if she wants to stay on the phone with me.

  'Nearly healed.' I tell her examining my scabs once more, 'Look, let's wipe the slate clean.' A fresh start is just what we need. Maybe she will be more reasonable if we can move on fresh from all that has happened.

  'Wipe it clean. Fine. I see what you are getting at. Bye.' She sighs, throwing me completely and hanging up.

  'Unreasonable. BLOODY UNREASONABLE.' I shout kicking the chair with every bit of strength I possess. I should have known she couldn't be reasonable. She is a bloody woman.

  Throwing the paperwork from my desk across the room, I am like a football hooligan looking for his next victim, all red-eyed, and heavy breathing.

  It is at this precise point Margaret, my Dads secretary pokes her head through the door. 'Mister Winch is on the phone for you, I thought I had best come in seeing as you might not have heard your phone ringing. If you can remember when your phone flashes red, it is an internal call and should always be answered. Thank you.' She nods and disappears back behind the door.

  Great, now I need to lick her arse for forever to stop her from spitting in my tea and calling my Dad.

  I pull my chair upright and drag it back to my desk before dropping into it. My life seems to be a constant merry-go-round full of shit, and the icing is Amy's Dad is back on my case, perfect.

  I look down at my phone and instead of calling him back, I play around the thought of ringing Jenny. On the one hand, I can get the inside info on how Lucy is doing and what my chances are, yet on the hand, I will more than likely have to sit there and listen to what an arsehole I am and how much better off she is. Without Lucy there to keep a leash on her, I’m not sure I fancy my chances.

  I am kind of surprised that between Jenny and her Mum, they hadn't managed to put her off me ages ago. I guess the upside is that at least she won't sugar-coat it for me to spare my feelings, and I know that if she does by some miracle think me and Lucy are meant to be together than she will say so. She is blatantly honest and upfront whether it is a quality or not I am still undecided.

  ***

  Jenny walks into my office, face set, ready to detect any bullshit. My heart sinks a little bit now she is here. I take a deep breath and grab the bull by the horns.

  'I want her back Jen and I want you to help me. Help me to get a chance to prove myself to her and make Lucy happy.' I ask dropping to my knees I hold my hands together.

  She calmly pulls her keys from her bag. Looking down at me, her face is unreadable. For a horrible moment I almost expect her to walk out and not say anything, leaving me on the floor like a prize twat.

  ‘Don’t you think
things are better left as they are?’ She finally breaks her silence.

  ‘No. No I don’t. We are meant for each other. It’s why we always end up back together. I’m not with Amy, not like that. I want to be with your sister. Think how happy she was before it all went wrong again.’

  ‘I don’t know Kev, it’s a bit much to ask.’

  ‘Is she with Drew?’ I can’t stop myself from asking.

  ‘Drew? Of course, she isn’t with Drew. You bloody two. A relationship starts and ends with two people, that is it. Two.’ She rubs her temples, keys jangling in her hands.

  ‘Will you help me?’ I ask again.

  'Let me think about it, I'm not sure Kevin, I'm really not. I don't want to say yes and get your hopes up and then change my mind.' She shrugs again and walks out of the door.

  I am still kneeling on the floor and even if I manage not looking like a prize prat, I certainly feel like one when Margaret walks into the office, poised to speak. After taking one look at me, she turns on her heel and leaves again quietly closing the door behind her.

  I'll have to get her some chocolates and flowers. Maybe a card to sweeten her up before Dad gets back.

  Without saying anything to anyone, I grab my keys and leave for the day. There is nothing urgent on and I'm not going to be any use here anyway, apart from giving Margaret more ammunition to use to get rid of me.

  Jenny is only just pulling out of the car park. Making a snap decision I run to my car and follow her. I need to know that Jen isn't lying and covering up for Drew and Lucy. I hope he really isn't on the scene.

  The short drive to the town becomes shorter by no cars being on the roads and makes my bright red Audi all the more conspicuous as I cruise past Jenny's parked car. Jen jumps out and I give her a wave as if to say what a coincidence this is. Her raised eyebrow and two finger salute makes it clear she knows exactly what I am up to. I speed up before she notices my face is the same shade as my car and gives me away further.

  I park up the road. A couple of minutes later, my phone beeps.

  'Party at Pete's tonight. I'm not saying I will help yet but see how tonight goes. Now stop stalking and go home.' Jen’s message is straight to the point as usual.