The Crown Jewels Boxed Set (A Crown Jewels Romantic Comedy Series)

by Melanie Summers

  “I’m sorry, Arthur, it’s just…so fucking funny.” She kisses me on the lips, and I find my bruised ego being soothed, but just a smidge.

  Reaching up on her tiptoes, she whispers in my ear, “I promise I’ll make it up to you later.”

  Totally worth it.

  The Royal Engagement

  ~ a crown jewels romance bonus short ~

  By Melanie Summers

  The Best Laid Plans…

  Arthur

  I’m about to do two things I’ve never wanted to. Number one: getting up at the crack of dawn so I can freeze my jewels off in the cold autumn air. Number two: proposing to my girlfriend. But these are the actions of a man in love—stupid, gushingly romantic gestures that will cause me to be a laughingstock among all the other dukes. Four months ago, if you had suggested I would ever do such a thing I would have thought you insane. But now, I’m the one who’s been stripped of his sanity because I will do anything to make her lips curve up toward the sun.

  But, good God, five-thirty in the morning is really bloody early on a Sunday to drag my arse out of bed.

  By the time I step out of the shower, my weariness gives way to a nervous excitement that I’ve never known in my life. I’m about to ask the woman of my dreams to marry me, and even though we’ve declared our undying love and devotion to each other there’s always that slight chance she’ll say no. The thought makes my stomach flip forward and back again. I take a deep breath and hurry down the hall to the back of the palace, where my car is waiting. I’m setting out sans bodyguard and driver today. Just Tessa and me for once.

  The security staff was rather easily convinced that, given the early morning hour and the secret plans, this is one excursion I can safely manage alone. I get behind the wheel and start up the Porsche that has only left the garage twice, then grin like a simpleton as I make my way down the long driveway.

  ***

  I see Tessa peering through the front room curtains when I pull up. She’s absolutely lovely as she smiles and waves. In the time it takes me to shut off the motor and climb out of the car, the front door opens and she jogs down the steps to me.

  “Good morning.” She wraps her arms around my neck and runs her fingertips along my cheek, the warmth of her touch reaching all the way down to my toes.

  “Good morning, Ms. Sharpe. You’re looking rather stunning today.” I give her a firm kiss—one that I hope she’ll remember many years from now, when we’re wrinkled and gray and every bit as happy as we are now. Unless she says ‘no,’ that is…

  “Mm, you just made getting up at five in the morning totally worth it.”

  I grin down at her. “That was nothing. Just wait till you see what I’ve got in store for you.”

  “Will you tell me now?”

  “Not yet. I’m going to keep you in suspense for another twenty-three minutes.” I lead her to the passenger side, then open her door.

  “Give or take a few seconds?” She purses her lips, trying to hide her amusement.

  “No. I accounted for one minute of witty banter on the sidewalk.”

  Tessa laughs, the sound joining the chatter of the birds. When she’s done, she gives me a very serious look. “Tell me now. I hate surprises.”

  “That’s just because you’ve never been properly surprised before by the right man.”

  “Who says you’re the—”

  I give her a quick kiss on the lips before she can finish her sentence. “I do. And I’m always right.”

  Our fingers are laced together while I drive out into the countryside. It’s the simplest of things—being alone in a car together—and yet it’s one of the most thrilling things I’ve done. We chat about nothing and everything, and tease each other and laugh together, and there is not one soul to hear us. It’s positively delicious.

  I’m almost disappointed when the drive ends and we find ourselves parked next to an enormous grassy field, where a bright blue hot air balloon waits in plain sight. Tessa gasps. “Is that what we’re doing?”

  “Only if you’re up for it,” I say. She laughs at my terrible joke and I love her for it.

  “You really were listening when I was giving you my impromptu bucket list.”

  “Of course I was listening. I made a mental note of the seventeen things you want to do, and I intend to see that you complete your list long before you kick the bucket.”

  “Aww, that’s so sweet.” She puts both hands on my face and gives me a most wonderful kiss on the lips.

  “Well, now I don’t want to go hot air ballooning. I’d much rather get you naked and do very naughty things with you until lunch time.” I press my forehead to hers for a moment.

  “That sounds good, too.”

  “But, since it’s already paid for, let’s go strike something off your list.”

  We hold hands as we cross the cool, dewy grass and find a tall, slight man crouched down near the basket, making last minute preparations.

  “Hello, you must be Mr. Donaldson.”

  “Carl.” He reaches out to shake my hand, then a look of recognition crosses his face. “Prince Arthur, I had no idea you would be my passenger today.”

  “I’m afraid I wanted to keep the word from getting out. But not to worry, think of this as just your everyday romantic balloon ride. This is Tessa Sharpe.”

  “Right, of course, the shock jogger lady!” He smiles and gives her a nod. “Well, we’ll see if I can’t turn the two of you into a couple of balloonatics.” He chuckles at his own joke, then clears his throat. “On to business. As your pilot, I’ll go over a few things about ballooning before we step aboard.”

  “Pilot? I didn’t know you call yourselves pilots,” I say, trying to suppress a grin.

  Carl’s entire body stiffens. “That’s what we are.” He points to the basket. “This is a registered aircraft, same as a helicopter or a fixed-wing aircraft. Those who fly aircrafts require a valid pilot’s license, and are therefore pilots.”

  Smart, Arthur—now you’ve insulted the man who’s about to take you and the woman you love up into the troposphere in a basket. Maybe we should move on to the naughty part of the day. But when I glance down at Tessa, she beams up at me, clearly still thinking this is a very good idea. “Of course. My apologies, Carl. I suppose I never thought of that.”

  Carl glares. “Few people do.”

  ***

  After an extremely tedious ten-minute lecture on both the history and functioning of hot air balloons, we step into the ‘gondola’ as our ‘pilot’ insists on calling it, and we’re finally ready to get started. I pull Tessa to me and give her a kiss on the cheek. There’s a chill in the air that I hope the sun will burn off as we go. Tessa shivers a bit and tucks her arms around my waist. Oh, maybe the cool air will work to my advantage after all…

  “Are you cold?” I murmur into her ear.

  She snuggles into my chest. “A little. Warm me up.”

  Carl turns to us. “I’ll warm you both up. Once the fire gets going it’ll be toasty on board.”

  “Thanks,” Tessa says. She opens her mouth to say something more, but her voice is drowned out by the violently loud burners as they fill the balloon with heat.

  We gently lift off the ground and rise into the sky, the basket swaying a little from side-to-side. Suddenly, I’m quite sure that this was a very bad idea. We’re thousands of meters off the ground in a very flammable, very tippy basket that creaks when you shift your weight. Oh, and there’s a roaring fire overhead.

  Just when I’m sure I should shout at him to take us back down, Carl cuts the flames back, and it’s suddenly quiet and very lovely as we float south over the countryside toward the sea, the trees below displaying their burnt oranges, brilliant yellows, and crimson leaves.

  “Where are we going?” Tessa asks Carl.

  “Wherever the wind takes us. That’s the beauty of air ballooning—the serendipity of the experience. It teaches one to go with the
flow.”

  Serendipity? What kind of pilot uses serendipity as his route-planning guide? “But surely as a pilot, you checked the winds and have a good idea of where we’re heading.”

  He smiles proudly. “Not a clue. Isn’t it wonderful?”

  “How do you find a suitable place to land?”

  Carl turns up the flame, the sound rushing around us. He shouts, “Oh, don’t worry about that! I can land on a target the size of a Volvo!”

  Shutting off the burner, he says, “As long as the wind is working with me.”

  Well, that’s about as comforting as my father after several scotches.

  I’m about to say something, but Tessa stops me by reaching her hand up and rubbing my one raised eyebrow. “Relax, Arthur…we could both use a little ‘go with the flow’ in our lives.”

  She turns to face the south and I watch her as she takes in the view. “It’s gorgeous, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, it is,” I grumble, then I catch myself and smile down at Tessa. I did this for her, and if she’s enjoying it I can consider it mission accomplished. But not in the George W. Bush sort of way. In this case, the mission really is accomplished. Except for the actual proposal part which is, in fact, the true purpose of the whole thing, so I suppose I did just George W. Bush it, didn’t I?

  We float along for almost an hour over the eastern shore of Avonia and south toward the city of Valcourt. The North Sea fills the rest of the landscape, shimmering in the morning sun. It is beautiful, and if I weren’t so nervous I’m sure I’d enjoy this. A clammy feeling comes over my skin, and I decide that I’ll propose right before we land. That way, if she says no, there won’t be a very long, awkward ride in which we are forced to pretend the other one isn’t here.

  “How much longer until we land?” I ask, feeling more than a little concerned about how close we are to the shore.

  “Oh, ten minutes, give or take,” Carl says. “Try to relax, Your Highness. Life’s not for rushing. It’s for living.”

  “Okay, thank you.” Yes, thank you, Dalai Lama of hot air balloon pilots. I swallow hard and try to plan out the big moment. How do I get down on one knee in this thing? I’ll be bumping right into Captain Zen. Bollocks. I did not think this through.

  “Are you all right, Arthur? You’re very quiet,” Tessa says.

  “He’s just trying to work out how to propose,” Carl says to her, leaning around me to give her a knowing smile. “I’ve seen it a hundred times. Surprise balloon ride along the shore, the nervous young man with nothing to say…”

  His gaze flicks to me, and he stops when he sees the glare I’m giving him.

  Tessa jumps up and down, rocking the gondola. “Oh, my God! Is that true, Arthur? Are you going to propose?”

  I grip the side with one hand, trying to steady us as we swing wildly. “The thought had occurred to me.”

  A gust of wind comes from the west and changes our direction very suddenly. Now we’re flying over the marina.

  “Uh-oh,” Carl says.

  I turn to him. “Everything all right, Captain?” There’s an edge to my voice that I don’t care to hide.

  “Yes, fine. Just trying to think of where to land now that we’re heading east.”

  “There’s a small park down there.” I point to my left.

  “Can’t land near a playground. It’s illegal.”

  “Yes, you bloody well can. I give you my permission.”

  “No offense, but you’re not a Civil Aviation Authority, Your Highness, so you’re not able to grant permission for me to make an illegal landing.”

  “But, surely you see that we’re going out to the sea if we don’t land now,” I say, panic rising in my voice. “Just land. I’ll pay any fines that you might incur.”

  “It’s not a fine. It’s removing my pilot’s license. I’d have to do the entire sixteen hours of in-flight time again.” Carl turns up the burners. “I’ll see if taking us up higher will help us catch a west wind!”

  “No! Take us down!” I shout.

  Tessa grabs my arm and yells in my ear, “Are you really going to ask me to marry you?”

  “Yes, I was, but now I’m a little more concerned with getting you off this thing alive!”

  The wind picks up and takes us out to sea. Carl cuts the flame again. “Hmm, that didn’t work.”

  “No? Are you sure, Captain? Because this looks like a perfect spot on which to land. The cold North Sea at high tide is the best place for a long swim.”

  “No need to be sarcastic, Your Highness,” Carl says, then he looks at Tessa. “Is he always this uptight?”

  “Not at all. He’s usually cool as a cucumber. I think it’s because he’s nervous about asking me to marry him!” Tessa beams. “Ask me, Arthur! I think my answer will make you feel better…”

  “Can we just hold off on that until we’re over dry land again, sweetie?”

  “That could be a while, I’m afraid,” Carl cuts in. “If the wind doesn’t change, we’re on our way to the Netherlands.”

  “Yes. I can see that, and I’ll feel a lot more relaxed once you share your plan now that serendipity seems to be taking us to sea.”

  He taps his pursed lips with one finger. “Not sure, really. This has never happened to me before.”

  Suddenly, he snaps his fingers and whips out his cell phone.

  “Who are you calling?”

  “The Coast Guard.”

  “Of course.” The one private moment I wanted to share with Tessa will now become an international incident.

  “This is Carl Donaldson, pilot of the ADSB-Serendipity. I am currently caught in an air current and have gone out to sea approximately five miles due east of the Valcourt marina. I have three souls on board, including Crown Prince Arthur.” Pause. “Yes. Yes, the Prince Arthur.” Pause. “That’s correct. It’s a lovely turquoise blue balloon.” Pause and a grin in our direction. Oh, now he gives us a comforting wink. “Yes, the prince is fine. We’re all fine for the moment, but I’m afraid I’m not going to be able to get us back to shore.” Pause. “Excellent. We’ll watch for them.”

  He ends the call, then pockets his phone. “Not to worry. They’re setting up a chase.”

  ***

  Not ten minutes later, we’re joined by four Coast Guard rescue boats as well as two news helicopters that circle us, their blades thumping as they follow us across the sea. I’m ready to ring Carl’s long, skinny neck for ruining what should have been the start of a perfect life together. Tessa has her arms folded and is barely speaking, presumably because of my surly mood.

  “Can’t control the wind,” Carl says for the third time in as many minutes. His phone rings and he swipes the screen. “Captain Carl Donaldson speaking.” Pause. “Oh, hello, love. Yes, that’s us on the telly! Quite the surprise, isn’t it?” Pause. “No, I didn’t know he was my passenger today, it’s all very hush hush.”

  He turns to face the other direction as though that will afford him any more privacy than it has us. “No, I don’t think he’ll agree to it. He’s actually not all that happy at the moment.” Pause. “Okay, I’ll ask.” Pause. “Lamb, I guess, if I have a choice, but since it’s your parents coming for dinner, you decide.” Pause. “Well, yes, that’s six hours from now. One way or another we’ll be back down by then.” Pause. “No, I won’t forget to ask him.” Pause. “Love you, too.”

  “Let me guess. Your wife wants you to take a photo with me?”

  “Got it in one,” he says, then he wrinkles up his nose. “But you know, Your Highness, it’s really not polite to listen in on people’s phone calls.”

  I raise my finger in the air, ready to lay into him, but Tessa pushes my hand back down. “The cameras.”

  Carl nods to the east. “You know…we’ve got enough juice to make it to the Netherlands. I say we go for it. What do you think? Should we be the first to cross the North Sea in a balloon?”

  Tessa nods. “Yes! Let’s do it
. Let’s have an adventure.”

  I shake my head, then am suddenly hit by the absurdity of the situation. Laughter bubbles up from my chest and spills out. “What the hell? What could possibly go wrong?”

  Tessa hugs me and I lower my head to her ear. “What do you say, Ms. Sharpe? Do you think we could make a go of this?”

  Tessa pulls back and gives me a skeptical look. “Is that your proposal?”

  “No, of course not. It was more of a warm-up question.”

  “Good, because that wasn’t very heartfelt at all.”

  Carl taps me on the shoulder. “Start by telling her how you feel about her,” he says with a wink.

  “I’ve got this, thanks. You fly the basket.”

  “Oh, right. Sorry.”

  Turning to Tessa, I wrap her in my arms again, my heart pounding so hard it hurts. “All right, let’s give this a go. You have been the single greatest surprise of my life, Tessa Sharpe. You’ve brought more understanding and love into my life in a few short months than I’ve known in all my years. I want to spend every single day with you, laughing and arguing and making up with you. I want to fall asleep with you wrapped in my arms every night. I want to take care of you—as much as you’ll permit—because, as cliché as this sounds, in a very short period of time you’ve become my whole world, my everything. You’re the only woman I’m ever going to ask to marry me, so if you don’t say yes, I’ll be forced to live out my days with Dexter, rattling around in the palace, missing you.”

  “You paint quite the sad picture.”

  “I’m hoping for a pity yes.”

  Tessa shakes her head. “I’m afraid I can’t.”

  My heart drops to my knees. “You can’t?”

  “I can’t give you a pity yes. That only works for shags. If I’m going to spend my life with someone, it has to be because we’re madly in love.”

  “You’re really making me work for this, aren’t you?”

  “If you’d asked twenty minutes ago when Captain Carl first brought it up, I would’ve made it easier.”