Lost & Found: Contemporary Reverse Harem

by Serena Lindahl

  Aric shrugs as he dips a fry in ketchup. “I kind of mentioned something to them last night.”

  I swallow hard as my food gets stuck in my throat. “You guys were together last night?” I hope my voice doesn’t sound as pathetic as I think it does.

  “No. Well, Apollo and Orion met me at my house. Aric was working, and he called in. When you told me that you’d sent me those letters, I needed backup,” Manny explains. “I was afraid I would go off on my stepmother.”

  My eyes widen. “Did you?”

  He shakes his head, running a hand through the silky black hair that’s styled long enough to fall into his eyes. My fingers twitch to push it out of his face; I occupy my hands with my food instead. “Not yet. But Dad is going to find out.” The anger sizzles beneath his words. I’ve thought that his stiff attitude over the last few years was just him being studious and hyperfocused on school and swim. Now, I recognize it for what it was and still is – anger. He’s operating under a thin haze of rage most of the time, similar to my cloud of fear.

  The realization distracts me away from the fact that the guys got together without me. I turn to Aric. His eyes are tired and his long hair is messy like he’s been playing with it all morning.

  “Just my mom being a bitch,” Aric mutters. “She’s trying to get full custody of Daisy and move her away so that she can’t come to our house anymore.”

  “That’s not fair!” I don’t realize how loud I’m talking until several people look our way. My hand finds Aric’s muscled forearm and his skin jumps beneath my touch. “Can she do that? Isn’t there a custody agreement in place?”

  “Yes, but Dad has strikes against him from when he was drinking, even though he’s been sober for two years now. And we can’t afford a lawyer.”

  “As soon as my dad gets home from his business trip, I’m talking to him,” Manny reassures him, and it doesn’t sound like the first time he’s said it.

  Aric sighs. He’s barely eaten anything. I don’t stop to consider my reasons before I slide closer to him. I wrap my arm around his middle and he automatically puts his arm over my shoulder. It feels just as perfect as when I was nestled under Orion’s arm. Aric is warm and leaner than Orion, but they’re both so much taller that I fit perfectly against their sides.

  Aric seems surprised at first and both guys across the table zero in on the nonexistent space between us. Apollo’s expression doesn’t change, but Manny’s eyes spark with something I can’t read. But Aric needs me, and I want to help him. He’s been there for me when I just needed someone to talk to. Without words, he reminded me that I was once loved and wanted.

  “It’s not only the custody I’m worried about,” Aric starts. His voice is soft - like he’s not here in this moment. His hand absently strokes my upper arm, slower and firmer than how Orion touched me. “I’m worried the stress is going to make him start drinking again. If he does, there’s nothing we can do for my sister. Mom will get her all the time. Eventually, Daisy will stop fighting and just let Mom completely brainwash her.”

  I bite my lip. I wouldn’t have any advice about how to get an addict off his or her drug of choice. My mom would have been the first to receive my help, not that she would want it. “You’re eighteen now. Can you get custody?”

  Aric looks at me and sighs. His jaw is covered in blonde stubble like he hasn’t shaved. I like it. I want to scratch his face and see what it feels like. I pop another chip in my mouth. What is it with me? Four years without touch and I want to climb all over these guys.

  “Not unless my mom fucks up and they consider an unmarried, uneducated eighteen-year-old a better choice.”

  I wince. Yeah, that probably isn’t going to happen. My mind turns over other ideas, but the truth is that I don’t have many ideas. My mom got me because there was no one else. Her parents disowned her years ago, and Dad’s parents were both dead. I have an aunt in Canada, I think, but I’ve never met her.

  “Don’t you have an aunt?” I ask suddenly. I vaguely remember him telling me something like that.

  “Yeah, but she doesn’t live here.”

  “Can she help you with a lawyer though? Maybe if there’s hope, your dad can stay away from the booze until custody is determined.”

  Aric’s eyes widen. Hope sparks in his pale eyes and his arm tightens around me. “That’s a good idea. I should call her. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it first.” His head lowers. Before I know what’s happening, he brushes his lips across my cheek. His long, silky hair tickles my neck and face. “I’m going to go call her right now. Thanks, Sen.”

  I smile as he gets up, taking his tray with him. I miss his warmth, but I’m kind of glad he’s gone. That kiss has me feeling sideways. Manny stares at me; his intensity makes me squirm. “What?”

  “Have you and Aric ever dated?” he asks bluntly. “I know you’ve spent more time with him than the rest of us.” There’s no judgment in his voice. If there had been, I might have stormed away with a few choice words, but it sounds like he’s just genuinely curious.

  “No. I’ve never dated Aric or done anything with him beyond what you just saw. Not that I really think it’s any of your business. You’re not my brother anymore.”

  “No, I’m definitely not your brother anymore.” There’s hidden meaning behind his words and dark eyes, something that makes me shiver.

  Thankfully, the bell saves me from responding to that confusing statement. I pick up my tray and nearly run from the table, hurrying to my next class. I have approximately three hours to get it together before I’m with all of them again. Maybe this isn't the best idea. My brain is screaming at me, asking me what the hell I think I’m doing. I have no answers.

  I spend all afternoon coasting through my classes. My thoughts keep returning to Manny despite Aric’s situation and the weight of Apollo’s and Orion’s attentions. I remember the first time I saw him after they returned to town. He’d grown up in the time he was gone. I remember appreciating his lean frame and how attractive he’d become. The realization made me feel a little weird, and I shut down all thoughts except how angry I was that he ignored my letters. I still have issues admitting that I find my ex-stepbrother hot. It seems a little wrong.

  I’m still thinking about it as I join the guys after school, and I can’t look at Manny as Apollo steers me toward the massive truck. Manny says he’ll meet us at the house and I’m relieved when he’s gone. Aric follows behind us. He has a smile on his face, but he won’t tell me anything until we get to the Tuckers.

  “What’s in that pretty head of yours?” Apollo asks when we’re halfway there.

  “Isn’t that supposed to be my question? Aren’t girls always asking what guys are thinking?”

  “Maybe, but you’ve never been a normal girl.”

  I think about this, and I suppose he’s a little right. I was a tomboy as a kid, but that wasn’t abnormal anymore. My experiences had aged me before my time, though. “What do you mean?”

  His hands tighten on the steering wheel like he’s thinking about it. It’s kind of fascinating to watch him handle the enormous vehicle. If it were me in the driver seat, I’d have difficulty seeing over the dash. “When we were kids, I didn’t really think about you as a girl. You were one of us. And when I started thinking about you as a girl, I couldn’t forget you. That makes you not normal because I’ve forgotten every other girl.”

  I stare at his profile, but he won’t look at me. “Have there been lots of girls you’ve forgotten about?” I can’t help but ask, and it’s a safer question than acknowledging that he’s thought about me for years.

  “Not as many as the rumors imply,” he says, reminding me he’s not the dumb jock that everyone at school thinks he is. He doesn’t get close enough to anyone for them to realize this. Only the three of us ever see the real Apollo.

  While I’m a little grateful he hasn’t worked his way through the cheerleaders like I’ve heard over the years, I’m still jealous. But I’m not a virgin eit
her. After everything went to shit at home, I sought out the comfort of guys so I could regain control over my body and try to connect my sexuality with something good instead of bad. It worked, but none of the guys lasted. There’d always been something missing, and I’d constantly compared them to my four best friends. One guy could never measure up to everything four men could provide, including the extra drama.

  The cozy neighborhood that we all grew up in brings back so many memories. Emotions strangle me and rest heavy in my chest. There’s the little park where we climbed trees and played before we were given permission to ride our bikes further. There’s the bridge that we used to play under, even though it was strictly forbidden. The neighborhood itself hasn’t changed much and I don’t know how to feel about that. It’s like it stayed lost in time while I moved on.

  The Tuckers’ house is a white split-level, and Mrs. Tucker keeps the flowers blooming prettily in her yard all summer. In our strange winter, the grass is still green. There’s a pool in the back yard now. It’s a common sight in Florida; nearly every inland home above poverty level has one.

  “Are your parents home?” I ask as Apollo pulls into the driveway all the way to the side so his parents can still access the garage.

  “Mom probably is. She’s going to be excited to see you.” His words are apologetic, and I push down my anxiety. His mom was always blunt and enthusiastic, and I brace myself for a welcome. Or maybe she hates me now that I’ve disappeared out of their lives. Manny parks along the street and Aric stops his bike behind the sleek BMW.

  I’m shaking as I climb up the front steps behind Apollo. It doesn’t seem like anything has changed. I miss the old days when things were simpler and I could go home to a house I feel safe in.

  Orion meets us at the front door. “Oh thank god,” he wails dramatically. “There’s only so many times I can play Madden solo before I lose my mind.” He bypasses his brother and swings his arms around me, picking me up until my feet are dangling above the ground. His eyes aren’t as easy-going as they usually are, though. I can tell something is bothering him, and it distracts me from the feel of his body against mine.

  “Ugh, put me down.” I fake like I’m coughing from the hold he has around my ribcage. He lowers me reluctantly, planting a kiss on the top of my head before he acknowledges Manny and Aric.

  “Honey, who’s here?” Mrs. Tucker’s voice, with her lilting accent, sounds like home. My heart clenches in my chest. Maria was an awesome mom, and Mrs. Tucker always felt like my second mom. She comes around the corner from the kitchen and stares at me like she’s seen a ghost. Her dark Italian complexion pales while her hands twist in her floral apron; it’s the same one she wore when we were kids when she baked us cookies. “Senya? Is that you?”

  I nod uncertainly, and she enfolds me in a soft, motherly hug that smells like cinnamon and vanilla. She holds me for several minutes before pulling back and studying my face. “You’ve grown into a beautiful young woman, Senya rhymes with Kenya.”

  I laugh, and the boys echo my snicker. When I met her as a precocious four or five-year-old, I always introduced myself that way because I hated when people mispronounced my name.

  “Is it because of you that my boy is suspended?” I shrink from her question. Both Orion and Apollo step forward to defend me, but she shakes her head. “I always taught my boys to protect their friends. I just want to know if that’s why.”

  “Yes, ma’am. Jack said some horrible things about Senya.” Manny is the one that answers and Mrs. Tucker’s apple cheeks break into a smile.

  “Never did like that kid. Violence isn’t the answer, but I’m not surprised that boy’s mouth got him in trouble. I hope he got suspended too?”

  I look at Orion; his face twists into a grimace. “Only for a day.” I cringe, thinking he’s going to return tomorrow and seek his revenge on me.

  “Don’t worry,” Apollo whispers to me as if he hears my thoughts. “He won’t bother you again.” I shrug. If I know anything, it’s that bullies don’t back down.

  Mrs. Tucker steps away from me and embraces Aric. He’s nearly six inches taller than her, but he looks like he enjoys the hug. He doesn’t have a wonderful mother figure either. “And Aric! It’s been too long! How is that sister of yours?”

  Aric smiles with more happiness than I’d seen all day. “She’s good for the most part. My mom has her more than we do, but she’s growing up great.”

  Mrs. Tucker smiles. For a second, it looks like she might say more, but she shrugs and tells us to be good as we run up the stairs to the boys’ rooms. “I suppose you don’t have to leave the door open since there are four of you,” she yells up behind us. Orion laughs like he finds that hilarious, but he doesn’t explain why. There used to be just one room for the boys up here. They shared a room, and the other bedroom was fashioned into a playroom. Orion leads us to what used to be their parent’s bedroom. An expensive gaming console and movie theater is set up with bean bags and cushions instead of couches and chairs.

  “Where do your parents sleep?” I ask curiously.

  “They remodeled the basement when we asked for separate rooms, so they sleep down there. The upstairs is our domain,” Orion brags as he bows like he’s some kind of butler in a fancy hotel.

  I stare at the sitting arrangements. “How are we going to do any homework here?”

  But Manny is already pulling a low coffee table to the center of the room and arranging the cushions and beanbags around it like he’s done it a hundred times before. Maybe he has. Orion boasts about Jack’s split lip and black eye while we take our seats. The boys practically wrestle each other to see who gets to sit next to me, and I roll my eyes at their theatrics. Finally, Orion and Aric bracket me, Apollo sits at the end of the table, and Manny sits across from me. He didn’t fight over the chance to sit next to me. I think he likes to unnerve me by staring from across the table.

  I slip off my shoes and sink down onto the fluffy cushion, nearly flashing everyone in the process. Today would have been a good day to wear leggings instead of my thigh-high socks. I tuck my legs under the table as the two guys sit down on either side of me.

  “Here, here, this inaugural meeting of the Adventurers’ Expedition Club is now in session.” Orion slaps the table for emphasis.

  I can’t restrain my laughter. “Such a stupid name.”

  Orion holds his hand to his chest in mock hurt. “I thought it was a great name when we were six,” he defended.

  “Well, we’re not six anymore,” I retort.

  “No, we’re not,” he says in a low voice.

  His eyes drop not so subtly toward my chest. I can’t decide if I’m flattered or embarrassed. To hide my uncertainty, I look away.

  “We have some things to talk about before we get started with our project,” Orion continues. “Aric, how did the talk with the aunt go?” I’m not surprised one of the others texted Orion with the details of our lunch.

  I glance at Aric, curious about this too, and his blinding smile nearly stops my heart. He’s just as good-looking as the brothers and Manny. His look is different, more devil-may-care than all-American, but his blonde hair is prettier than mine. His pale eyes flash. “Really good. Aunt Deedee is going to pay a lawyer to look into it. She’s never liked my mother.”

  I remember Aric’s mother. She always seemed friendly on the outside, but rotten on the inside. She’d make snide remarks to her kids and her husband all the time. As a child, I was confused as to whether she actually liked her family. She reminded me a little of my mother, except my mother doesn’t hide anything. All her rotten traits hang out for everyone to see.

  “That’s great!” I smile at Aric, pleased that it worked out.

  “It is! Thank you, Sen. I already called Dad, and I can tell he’s feeling a little better. I think it’s going to be okay.” He looks so relieved. I can’t help but capture him in a hug like I did at school today. His arms wrap around me like they’re supposed to be there. When we pull apa
rt, he leaves one arm slightly behind me. If I leaned back, I could rest against his forearm.

  “That’s awesome,” Apollo says sincerely and claps Aric on the back. Aric seems happier than he has for a while, and I wonder if the class setup was as much for his benefit as mine. Maybe he’d always wanted to make up with the guys, but my animosity stopped him. The thought fills me with guilt.

  “You said there was something else?” Manny asks Orion. His brows slant curiously behind his glasses. While he speaks, he takes off the sweater he's wearing over a white t-shirt. I’m immediately distracted by how ripped he is. He’s not built like the brothers, but every muscle in his chest and stomach is chiseled under the thin shirt. His shoulders are broad and his muscles are tight. I force my gaze away before I start drooling. I’ve seen him in his swim trunks at a meet before, but there’s something more intimate about it here, even though he’s wearing more clothing. He was always a scrawny boy, but he's not any longer.

  “Yeah,” Orion says. He glances at me, and I try to pretend like I wasn’t just ogling my ex-brother. His gaze has a hint of hurt behind it that makes me nervous. My fingers twist in my lap. “You said something this morning that pissed me off a little, Pixie. But more than that, it kind of hurt.”

  I stare at him in confusion. We said a lot this morning and nothing sticks out to me. When he doesn’t continue right away, Manny prods him. All their gazes are on me, each one different.

  “You suggested that we’re just being nice because we feel guilty for not being there after the funeral.”

  My eyebrows draw together. That upset him? Looking around the circle, it seems like he’s not the only one affected. Manny glares at me, Apollo looks upset, and Aric studies my face like he’s trying to figure out if I really feel that way.

  “It’s okay if you are,” I begin. “I understand it’s not really your faults. Manny’s dad had already planned to move before the accident, you two had football camp, and Aric was dealing with his dad and sister. I’m no longer in your circle.”