Lost & Found: Contemporary Reverse Harem

by Serena Lindahl

  “What kind of confession?” Aric asks carefully. I want to know too. My legs are stretched out in front of me. Both he and Manny lay their hands on my legs while Apollo sits next to Orion and snatches one of my hands. I could get used to this quickly.

  “Something about us,” Orion answers after considering the question. I don’t like that I can’t see his or Apollo’s face. I shift a little, sitting more with my back to the empty space between him and Aric. The other guys adjust their positions so they can still touch me, although Orion pouts dramatically as I move sideways in his arms. I press a light kiss to his lips.

  “I want to be able to see your face,” I explain.

  He kisses me back, increasing the pressure on my lips before he pulls away. “You keep kissing me, and I’ll forget about spilling my secrets. Everyone okay with this?”

  We all nod, and I try to think of a confession. It can’t be about any of the stuff that went on while I was hiding from them because that’s not technically about us.

  Orion breathes deep, dragging it out dramatically. “Okay, I’ll go first since this was my idea.” He looks around the circle. He’d changed into a white tank top that reveals all his muscles. He and Apollo look the same except their sleep pants are different colors – Apollo in black and Orion in blue. Apollo is a little broader and thicker, but their bodies are both masterpieces. My eyes rove along the circle since I’m sitting down now and not in danger of falling over. Manny is dressed similarly, in a tight t-shirt and flannel pants. His muscles are toned and lean. Aric’s shirt is looser. He’s wearing athletic shorts that reveal his long legs. He’s put his long blonde locks in a loose bun at the back of his head. It looks sexy, although I love his hair down too.

  “I set up the group with Mrs. Desmon,” Orion confesses in a long rush. I bend over in a peal of laughter, catching the twitch of Aric’s lips at the same time. Orion stares at me. “What?”

  I point at Aric, unable to speak because it’s so funny. What did the woman think when two different guys came to her and asked her to manipulate the groups in the class? Aric grins, his pale eyes amused. “So did I.”

  Manny smirks and Apollo laughs. His laughter is a low rumble that vibrates through my chest.

  I laugh until tears are practically streaming from my eyes. It takes several minutes for the amusement to fade. “If you would have told me that a week ago, I might have kicked you all. Now, I’m kind of glad. But poor Mrs. Desmon…”

  Matching smiles ring the circle, nearly stealing my breath from all the beauty I’m surrounded by. Aric’s hand catches my free one. “I’ve missed your laughter, Sen.” The others nod in agreement.

  “I haven’t laughed much in a while. It feels good.” And it does. It feels like something has finally released within me, something important. The protective shield I’ve erected around me for the past five years is finally loosening.

  “Okay, that doesn’t count for any of our confessions,” Manny decides. He points at Orion. “Think of something else. I know you have one.” His lips tilt meaningfully. Orion groans, looking up at the ceiling.

  “You’re really going to make me say it?”

  “I won’t make you,” Manny replies as he pushes his glasses up. “But now everyone wants to know.”

  “It’s true. Now I have to know,” I agree as I lean over Aric’s lap for the soda I left at the edge of the enormous mattress bed. A surprised squeak bursts from me when a large hand cups my ass.

  Orion’s eyes shine with laughter. “I can’t resist, Sen.” His hand caresses my butt cheek for a minute before I sit back down and he removes his hand reluctantly. My ass tingles with the aftershocks of his touch. He moves the hand to my thigh, tugging my leg closer to his body. I lean back against his outstretched leg and Aric stretches his arm behind me so he can support my back. If they have problems being so close to each other, none of them gives any indication.

  “Confession,” I order Orion. “You started this.”

  “Fine.” Orion groans again. “You remember those two months in ninth grade when Ashley Banks pasted used gum all over your locker?” He doesn’t look at me as his hand rubs across my leg nervously.

  “Yes,” I say slowly. It had been baffling because I’d never met the girl before. And gross.

  “That’s my fault.”

  My brows rise. “How is that your fault?”

  “That was one night I did get wasted, one of two times. I slept with Ashley. I called her by your name.” He cringes as several emotions cascade through my chest. The first one is jealousy, the second one is humor, and the third is a spark of pity. No wonder she hated me. I was surprised she didn’t do more than just plaster my locker with chewed gum because I would have been pissed if a guy did that to me. The last emotion is realizing again that they told the truth. They never forgot me.

  “Poor girl,” I finally settle on. I release my hand from Apollo’s grasp and poke Orion’s chest. “You ever do that to me, I’ll do more than throw old gum at you.”

  Orion snatches my hand and kisses the offending finger. “Deal. I promise that I will only scream out your name.” His eyes are dark, and I shiver.

  “Next,” I call out, trying to ease the sudden hammering of my pulse as his voice does dangerous things to my body.

  Apollo clears his throat, and I brace myself for the next one. I want to be prepared for anything they throw at me, but I don’t think anything could change my mind at this point. I am hopelessly theirs. I always was. Apollo recaptures my hand and runs his other hand through his dark hair. “I took lots of photos of you.”

  “When?”

  “As soon as I found out where you disappeared to – so for the last four years.” I stare at him, my mouth open. How did I never notice? “I know it’s kind of stalker-ish, but you’ve always made the best subject. The camera loves you.” Passion for his hobby infuses his words, and I decide I can’t really be mad at him.

  “I can’t believe I’m so unobservant,” I tell him with a small smile, letting him know I’m not mad at him.

  “My brother can be a sneaky bastard,” Orion says. He’s not surprised. He knew. Manny doesn’t look surprised either, but not much gets by him.

  Aric clears his throat, and I meet his gaze. “I’ll go next since mine’s similar. A lot of my sketches from the past five years are of you. It’s not the same as following you around,” he says with a small smile in Apollo’s direction, “but still kind of creepy.” His arm tenses against my back, something like ice entering his eyes. “One more thing since that probably isn’t much of a surprise.” He ducks his head. I’m sure he wishes his hair was down to hide his face. “I’m still a virgin.”

  I gape at him. “How?”

  “What do you mean, how?”

  “All the girls at school want you.”

  He shrugs his broad shoulders. “I was never interested. I had my eyes on someone else.” His pale eyes fill me with heat as he leans over and gently kisses my bare shoulder. Goosebumps rise on my arms.

  “You never made a move,” I say pointedly. “I had no idea.”

  He shrugs. “I know. I’m kind of weird, I think. It never felt right being with you without these guys. That doesn’t mean I wanted you any less, but I almost felt like I was cheating on them.” He shrugs again, and I recognize it as the nervous gesture it is. I turn as much as I can and wrap my arms around him.

  “I don’t think it’s weird. Sometimes when you and I met, it was harder for me because it just brought up memories of us all together. I’m not sure I could have dated you while I was still mad at everyone else.” His lips meet mine tentatively but surely. He might be a virgin, but he’s obviously kissed other girls. His lips are full and soft, more like Manny’s than the brothers. My fingers find the edge of his jaw and coast along the stubble there. His hair is so pale, it’s almost like it’s invisible. A hand on my hip is the only thing that draws me away from him.

  “Not yet,” Orion teases, but his voice is thick with desire.
“You’re not getting out of your confession that easy, Pixie.”

  That wasn’t my intention, but I smile as I kiss Aric one last time and sink back into my spot. “Time out for a second. Does it bother any of you when I kiss the other one in front of you?”

  “Still trying to get out of your confession,” Orion teases, but he shakes his head. “I thought it would, but it doesn’t.”

  “I think it’s hot,” Aric admits. I feel a little vindicated that I guessed right at lunch. He does like to watch. The thought fills me with hunger and makes my clit pulse. My thighs clench together to ease the sudden throbbing.

  “I don’t mind,” Apollo says.

  Manny shrugs. “I thought I would be jealous too, but I’m not. Remember when we were in sixth grade and we went to the county fair? We wanted to go on the Ferris wheel. We ended up drawing straws to see who got to ride with you first and then we took turns. Maybe it’s not so different than that.”

  “I’m not a carnival ride,” I gasp in mock outrage. I don’t really mind. I know what he’s saying.

  “I didn’t say we drew straws to see who would ride you,” Manny protests with forced exasperation. His fingers coast down my calf. I don’t realize what he’s doing until his fingertips trail across my arch. I stiffen. “I’m just saying that we’ve been sharing everything with each other since we were four. From the moment we met at Mrs. Potter’s house while she babysat for a neighborhood potluck, we’ve shared.” His fingers move up and down my feet. I squirm, trying to restrain my squeals. “You’re still ticklish,” he points out with a devilish smirk.

  I jerk my foot away from him. “Okay, now you’re trying to get out of your confession. You go first.”

  “Now who’s bossy?” he asks with a crook of his eyebrow, but I just shrug. I settle more comfortably against Aric’s arm, not minding that Orion’s thigh is between us.

  Manny stalls by playing with the fringe on the cuff of his sleep pants. His other hand wraps around my ankle with firm authority. “When I got back to town and you pushed me away, I went a little crazy. I ended up getting stuck in counseling and rage management classes, but I also slept with several girls. They were hate fucks. I wasn’t very nice to them.”

  I stare at him as silence rings the circle. The words from the girl in the bathroom make sense now. She was one of the ones he tossed aside. He continues. “I didn’t hurt them. I would never do that. But I didn’t give them any affection. I never talked to them after I fucked them. It took Orion and Apollo to get me out of my funk.”

  I sit forward on my knees and embrace him like I did Aric. “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t say that,” he growls in my ear as his hand cups the back of my head. “It’s not your fault. Those were my choices. I apologized and I got better, but I’m not proud of my actions.” He clasps me tighter.

  Sensing that he still needs me, I shift to sit in between his legs and the other guys move around me as Orion pouts dramatically. “There’s plenty of me to go around,” I tell him.

  “Not really,” Orion argues. “You’re tiny and we’re big guys. And there are four of us. I realize we can’t all have you at once, so you just need to move a lot. But you have to allow me my disappointment when you’re not in my arms.”

  I laugh at his dramatics and nod. “Okay, my confession.” I can only think of one thing I haven’t told them yet. I look at Apollo and Orion. “When you came to my middle school, I intentionally hid from you. I know that for months, you came every day after school. I got detention on purpose or snuck away through the park behind the school so I didn’t have to talk to you. I don’t know why, exactly.” I shrug. “I just… So much was different in my life. I couldn’t handle getting my hopes up. I was also depressed and told myself all sorts of stories about how no one wanted me.”

  Apollo looks at his brother and nudges his shoulder. “Told you I saw her running away.”

  Orion squints at me like he’s trying to decide something. “I think you need to give a sex confession. The rest of us did. Well, except Apollo.”

  “Well if I have to, Apollo also has to,” I protest as I try to think of what I could possibly confess. I lean over and grab my soda again. Manny’s arms tighten around my middle, his fingers brushing against the bottoms of my breasts as I bend over.

  After I take a drink, Apollo steals it from me with a grin and gulps down the rest of it. “There are more,” he points out when I gape at him. “So, what’s it going to be? Are we going to share a sex confession or are we going to tell them to shove it?”

  I shrug and take a deep breath. “It’s not so much of a confession. It also doesn’t have much to do with the five of us, but I’ll play. The guy I stabbed - he didn’t rape me or even really molest me because it was mostly physical and verbal abuse, but he did make me feel pretty shitty about my sexuality and my body. The three times I’ve had sex, it didn’t involve emotion. It was all to help me regain a little control over my body and help me get comfortable with my sexuality again.” It feels good to get that off my chest, and the similarity to Manny’s confession doesn’t escape me. I catch his eyes over my shoulder. “I wasn’t very nice to those guys either.” His arms tighten around me, comforting. Each of the others reaches for me, skimming a hand along my leg or holding my hand. I feel like a weight has lifted off me. We shared everything when we were kids, but life is more complicated now.

  Apollo appears deep in thought. “I don’t know what to say,” he says after a minute. “I didn’t have any hate fucks, I didn’t call anyone by your name, and I’m not a virgin.” He shrugs. “I did have one encounter where I can’t remember who I fucked. That still bugs me. I haven’t drunk vodka since that night.”

  “No one bragged about it?” I ask curiously. Judging by what the guys have told me, a lot more girls have bragged about having sex with the brothers than they’ve actually slept with.

  Apollo shakes his head. “She was blonde, I think. Maybe she didn’t go to school here. It was after an away game at a party in Moorehaven.”

  I nod. That makes sense. Anyone local would have claimed it – which is sad but so like teenagers. “That’s a lot of heavy shit. One more kind of uncomfortable question before we watch a funny movie. Have you all been tested after your last partner?” The three guys nod and I breathe a sigh of relief. “Me too,” I say, thankful to Planned Parenthood for both that and my birth control. Mom doesn’t exactly have me insured. At least we’re safe if things progress.

  “Okay, movie time!” Orion shouts. He bounces up from the mattress with so much energy that I spring away as he jumps over us. I sneak away to use the bathroom after all the soda I drank. Staring at myself in the mirror, I’m surprised by how clear and bright my eyes are. Sadness presses through me for a minute. If I lose this, if I lose them a second time, I don’t know if I’ll survive.

  Chapter 22

  Senya

  When I get back, the guys are playfully fighting over who gets to lie next to me. I fall into the middle of them, half-sitting on Apollo’s lap with my legs over Aric and Manny.

  “I’m too little for you all to share me,” I tell them.

  My words don’t discourage them. Manny takes it as a challenge to solve the problem. “I think we can do this, but you might have to shift around to make it fair. Apollo, sit against the wall.” Apollo backs up. Manny takes hold of my ankles, pulling me down so my head is in the huge football player’s lap. “Then, you two lie next to her.” Orion and Aric position themselves so that their heads are near my shoulders. I wrestle my hands out from under them so I can play with their hair and give Manny a questioning glance.

  “And where are you?”

  Manny smirks and nudges Aric so that he’s more perpendicular than he was before. Then, he lies down with his head on my thigh.

  “Are you comfortable?” Orion asks, picking his head up to look at me. “It’s like a jigsaw puzzle. It’s kind of fun.”

  “I’m comfortable for right now, but I don’t know
how long I can stay like this.”

  Manny nods. His head moves against my thigh, making me suck in my breath. If he were facing toward me, his mouth would be so near… I bite my lip, sure that my cheeks have gone red.

  Orion distracts me by snapping the strap of my bra. “Do you sleep with this on? That can’t be comfortable.”

  “It’s not. And no, I don’t.”

  “So take it off.” His words are more of a dare than an order. I sit up and slide it off under my shirt without flashing anyone.

  Aric shakes his head. “I never understood how girls do that.”

  “It’s magic,” I whisper and lie back down with a smile.

  Manny’s hand wraps around my calf. “Start the movie,” he orders. Orion sits up with another groan and pushes the button on the remote. It’s some action comedy that has me laughing, but I barely pay attention because the men are driving me crazy.

  Apollo’s hands start playing through my hair before sliding down my neck. For such a large man, he has a gentle touch that raises gooseflesh on my arms and spreads shivers across my skin. Aric’s hands don’t stay at his side for long. One hand covers my stomach, his thumb stroking the tender skin between my ribs. Orion cuddles up to my side and rests his hand on my hip. His head is almost pillowed on my breasts. If they were any bigger, they’d be in his face. Manny’s head somehow moves higher, his hand stroking the length of my calf. I never knew my calves were so sensitive.

  Halfway through the movie, my nerves are alight. The tension has apparently spread through the room because the guys stop laughing at the obvious jokes. When my gaze flashes up to Apollo, he’s looking at me and not the movie. His forest eyes are dark with desire. A shudder moves through my body, and my panties grow damp. Manny’s head inches slightly higher; his fingers caress the skin above my knee. Orion grasps my hip harder, and Aric’s hand moves up so that his thumb is now brushing the underside of my breast.