Swamp Happens: The Complete Swamp Bottom Series

by Cora Kenborn

  Three o’clock that afternoon, I stood outside the front door of the DuBlanc office pacing like a caged animal. Savannah told me to grow some balls and confront my ex-husband about dragging his feet on the divorce papers, so once I got caught up on paperwork, I took her advice and called him. As usual, he made up some bullshit excuse about being too busy.

  He sighed his typical haughty, aristocratic sigh. “Why is it so important for you to have them now? You’ve argued for months with me about them.”

  “Gee, maybe because making things easy on you was the least of my priorities.” I rubbed my forehead as I paced, a headache brewing behind my eyes. “My ‘give a fuck’ well has almost run dry, Roland. You’re the one who wanted a divorce in the first place so you could have your precious name back. Here’s your chance. Take it because I don’t fucking want it.”

  “I can’t believe you’re speaking to me like this.”

  “I can’t believe you have the brains to run a company but can’t seem to figure out I hate you.”

  “Watch your mouth, Adelaide,” he warned, his tone taking on an authoritative condescending that used to make me cower.

  “Oh fuck off, you sanctimonious asshole.”

  Damn, that felt good.

  The line went silent, and for a moment, I thought he’d hung up on me.

  “You know, we did have some good times,” he finally said, taking me completely off-guard.

  Holding in a laugh, I pressed a palm against the brick wall outside the office. I had no idea why I bothered pretending to consider his transparent shift in attitude. He couldn’t see me, and it wasn’t like the man could catch a hint, even if it crawled up his ass.

  “Nothing comes to mind.” It didn’t matter how long I thought about it. Not one happy memory would erase the lonely nights, his incessant need to change me, or the infuriating image of Brandi answering the door to my own house.

  “What about the—”

  “Come on,” I groaned, cutting him off and drawing out the phrase with an eye roll. “We’ve always been dysfunctional. You were my escape, and I was your trust fund ticket. You negotiated our marriage like a business deal. Love shouldn’t be that way. That’s not what a soulmate is.”

  He chuckled. “Oh, and you’re an expert on soulmates now?”

  “Maybe I am.”

  “Is this about that low-class fisherman who—”

  “This is about me, Roland,” I interrupted, refusing to have this conversation with him. “It’s about your obsessive need to control me. This is one time that Roland Bordeaux can’t have his cake and eat it too.”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “It means I’m done playing nice. Sign the fucking papers, or the next call I make will be to Brandi. I don’t think she’d be happy to hear how you’ve managed to keep her as a side piece while dicking your ex-wife around.”

  “Threats come with consequences,” he growled, his voice thick with warning. “You’re still my wife, Adelaide. Don’t forget that.”

  Fire heated my skin. Just the thought of still being married to this asshole had me kicking the brick wall and almost breaking my toe. However, before I could say a word, a large shadow cast behind me, and an inked arm reached around my shoulder and snatched the phone out of my hand. Gasping, I spun around just as Zep raised the speaker to his lips while gripping the phone so tightly I expected it to shatter in his hand.

  “The only consequence that’ll happen is my foot up your over-privileged ass. Sign the fucking papers and stop the bullshit, Bordeaux.”

  “Zep!” I shrieked, frantically swatting at the phone. His blue eyes blazed with rage, and he extended an arm, keeping the phone out of my reach.

  “And she’s not your wife, dickhead,” he added with a smug curl of his mouth. “Especially now that she’s having my—”

  “Remember what I said, Roland,” I broke in randomly as Zep glared down at me, a lock of his dark hair falling over his pinched eyebrows. “Process this shit, or I’ll have an overdue talk with Brandi.”

  Performing an impressive NBA worthy leap in the air, I slapped his arm and grabbed my phone. The lines shooting from the corners of his eyes deepened, and I quickly disconnected the call before he could do any more damage.

  Zep’s jaw ticked as he leaned in and caged my back against the rough bricks. “Why wouldn’t you let me tell him you’re having my baby?”

  “Because he’d tie this divorce up so tight in red tape I’d still be married well into my golden years. Use your brain, LeBlanc. He’s a vindictive little shit who’d use it to find a way to delay this even more.”

  I held in a groan as he shoved a knee between my legs. As he pressed our noses together, his stormy eyes lightened, and he arched an eyebrow. “Soulmates, huh?”

  “Don’t read anything into it.” With my pulse thumping out of control, I turned my cheek and stared at the pavement. “I was making a point.”

  He tilted my chin toward him, forcing me to endure the self-indulgent little smirk crinkling the corners of his eyes. “I think you finally admitted what we’ve known all along.”

  “That I’m a born negotiator?”

  I found myself holding my breath, my eyes transfixed on a smudge of dirt on his left cheek tracing the edge of his beard. I loved that smudge. I needed that smudge. Without it, I’d have to look him in the eye and tell the truth, and there was only so much truth I could handle in one day.

  Instead, the man I’d never gotten over, the one who got me more than anyone ever had, simply grinned “Yeah, exactly. We’re destined negotiators.”

  “Exactly,” I repeated.

  As the hot sun pelted us, we stared at each other, an unspoken bond strengthening.

  And then it went to hell.

  “Speaking of negotiating…”

  My stomach plummeted, and I jerked my chin out of his rough hand. I knew what was coming, and today, of all days, I couldn’t deal with turning him down again. However, this time, he came prepared. Watching breathless, I stood still, my limbs hanging heavily by my side as his hand dove for his pocket and pulled out a simple solitaire diamond. I stared at it as if it were the largest diamond I’d ever seen. My mind kept telling my body to move, but it was as if that little circle of silver had rendered me powerless. It wasn’t even a fourth of the size of the one on Savvy’s hand, the shine dull with a cloudy and grainy finish.

  But it was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

  My hand flew to my chest, and it took three tries to find my voice. “When did you get that?”

  “When I left the restaurant after you told me about the baby.”

  “You bought a ring after I told you no?”

  He glanced up on an exhale, lifting the ring and tapping the stone against my bottom lip. “You’ve told me no for years, baby. Why would I start listening now?”

  The intimate gesture caught me off guard. I found myself laughing at the truth in his words, and my hand wrapped around his on its own accord. I barely noticed Zep had moved his other hand from the wall until it cupped my cheek, his thumb tracing the corner of my mouth. My stomach fluttered as he leaned in closer, hard stone of the diamond the only thing blocking the kiss I craved.

  A diamond I knew he couldn’t afford.

  I was so caught up in the moment that it took a few shrill rings from the phone still tucked in my hand to realize my alarm was going off again.

  Shit. I’m late.

  Reality slapped me cold and hard, forcing a clarity that dissolved the intimacy. “I have to go.”

  “Right now? Addie, come on, I’m kind of hanging out in the wind at the moment.”

  A million excuses to where I was going ran through my mind, and I immediately rejected a million and one of them. I’d promised to stop playing games with him, and the fallout from an omission like this would be so much worse than the truth.

  “Savannah’s engaged.” The words just spewed out like word vomit.

  He didn’t seem surp
rised. “Good for them.”

  “You’re not shocked?”

  He lifted a shoulder in a bored shrug. “Pope showed me his grandmother’s ring a while back. I was just waiting for him to grow some balls and ask her.”

  Hello, uncomfortable silence.

  “My answer hasn’t changed, Zep.” My out of control emotions wouldn’t allow me to look at his face, so I glanced toward the parking lot. “I have to go. I have a doctor’s appointment.”

  His jaw tightened, the cords in his neck standing out against his tanned skin. “Why didn’t you tell me about it?”

  “I’m not trying to keep things from you,” I promised. “But there are just some things a girl doesn’t want her guy to see. Me, spread eagle in stirrups is pretty high up on the list.”

  Instantly opening his mouth for rebuttal, he quickly closed it, wincing at the mental image. “Wait, did you say spread eagle?”

  “Maybe,” I grinned. For as long as I could remember, Zep LeBlanc had a face you could read like a book, and this was no different. I really needed to stop screwing with him, but with his eyes widening like they were ready to pop out of his head, who could blame me?

  As my phone chimed again, Zep grumbled and grabbed my wrist, turning it toward his reddening face. “Jesus, does that fucker have cockblock radar on me or something?”

  “It’s my alarm. I’m late.” Prying his fingers off my arm, I dropped my phone in my purse and nodded toward the truck as he sighed.

  “Are you sure you won’t let me go with you?”

  “I’m sure. I’m already nervous enough as it is.” As his face fell, I brushed a hand down his bare arm and smiled. “I promise to tell you everything.”

  I made it halfway to the truck before he called out my name, the pain in his voice stopping me cold. Slowly turning, my stare fixated on the hurt swirling in his eyes.

  “My dad was a worthless bastard. He got my mom pregnant and walked out on both of us. I’ve never seen the man in my life and don’t care to. My mom is everything to me, but he’s a heartless piece of shit who left us to starve. The man’s blood may be in my veins, but I’m not him. My kid won’t go through what I did. I’m going to be there every day, and I promise I’ll be the best dad you’ve ever seen.” Puffing out his cheeks, he exhaled a slow breath and lowered his eyes. “Just like you had.”

  In thirteen years, I’d never known Zep to speak of his father. From the pain etched across his handsome face, I knew the confession took everything he had inside to admit, and an overwhelming need to wrap my arms around him came over me. Maybe it was a maternal instinct kicking in, or maybe it was something more powerful that made me ache to protect the little boy who wondered what he’d done to make his father leave.

  I never had the chance to know that child, but I knew the man all too well. He didn’t want sympathy. He’d consider it weak, and unbecoming of a man. Instead, I allowed a genuine smile to say what I couldn’t.

  “I know you will. I don’t doubt that for a minute.”

  As my alarm buzzed for the third time, I climbed in the truck and drove away, watching in the rear-view mirror until he disappeared.

  51

  Hello, Gummy Bear

  Adelaide

  New Orleans, Louisiana

  The scrap of crinkled white paper rustled as I smoothed it over my exposed lower half. Honestly, calling it a scrap of paper was generous. It was more like an oversized paper towel made of wheat and wishes.

  As in, I wished I had some fucking pants on.

  As I arranged it for the fifth time, it finally ripped down the center, and I gave up. “Son of a bitch,” I muttered, flouncing backward against the metal exam table.

  Immediately, the door opened, and I sat up, trying desperately to piece together the gaping hole in the only thing separating the people in the hallway from an up close and personal view of my crotch. After performing an impressive contortionist maneuver, I painted on a polite smile and glanced up, expecting to lock eyes with the doctor. Instead, I collided with sky blue frantic ones that peeked out from underneath wild dark hair.

  “What the fuck, Zep?” I blurted out as his eyes traveled down the length of my bare legs. Fighting a wave of nausea, I waved a frantic hand toward the hallway where nurses and patients milled about. “Get out!”

  “I’m not going anywhere.” He swallowed hard, and the only thing wider than his eyes was the crater sized hole in my gown.

  “Then for God’s sake, shut the door! What the hell are you doing here?”

  Swinging the door behind him, he slammed it with a force that shook the whole room. “Look, I know what you said, but you also know what I said. I told you I’m not going to let my kid down, and that starts with being at…at…whatever the fuck this is,” he said, waving a hand at my shredded paper sheet.

  “While I appreciate the sentiment, I’m not comfortable with—” The rest of my speech cut off as the door opened again and a young man who could only be described as Thor in a white lab coat stepped inside, his brilliant white smile gleaming.

  “Hi, I’m Dr. Taylor.” Extending a muscular arm, he introduced himself as I reluctantly lifted a hand from the death grip on my paper sheet and shook his hand. “You must be Adelaide Bordeaux.”

  “Dubois,” Zep bit out through clenched teeth.

  Dr. Taylor scanned the file in his hand, and his eyebrows pinched together in confusion. “I’m sorry, do I have the right room?”

  “Bordeaux is my married name,” I groaned, averting my eyes away from the vibrating nerve ball beside me. “Bordeaux is on my insurance card, but he’s right, it’s Dubois.”

  “Oh, of course.” Smiling again, he dipped his chin, his chin length blond hair hugging his face like a halo. “Well, the first thing we’re going to do is a physical exam, and then we’ll get the tech in here to get a look at this little one. Sound good?”

  “Whoa, a physical what?” I winced as Zep’s voice lifted with a heavy layer of anxiety.

  “I’m going to make sure her cervix is closed and measure her uterus,” Dr. Taylor explained, eyeing Zep’s coiled body language. “And you are…?”

  “The only man allowed to see her circus and euphemis.”

  “That’s cervix and uterus,” I mumbled, wanting nothing more than to crawl under the table.

  The doctor seemed to take everything in stride. “Yes, well, if you’ll step outside for a moment, we can get this over with and get to the good part.”

  “You’re going nowhere near her good part.” Zep stood motionless, eyeing Dr. Taylor as if he were about to beat his chest like a gorilla and throw a handful of his own shit on the wall.

  I nudged him toward the door. “Go, it’ll only be a minute.”

  “But, Addie…”

  My arm shot out, grazing his cheek as I pointed across the room. “Go!”

  “Fine,” he scowled, purposely shoulder checking the doctor on the way out. “But I’ll be right out here if you need me for anything.”

  A loud rip tore through the room as I flounced back onto the table, and the paper towel completely disintegrated. I shook my head as Thor raised an eyebrow at my half-naked body.

  Apparently, the sound didn’t go unnoticed outside either.

  “Addie? You okay in there?”

  “Unexpected blessing?” Dr. Taylor noted with a chuckle while positioning the infamous stirrups.

  “Unexpected affair,” I answered, closing my eyes.

  “You couldn’t have found a female doctor? Maybe one of those gray-haired bitches with a mole on her chin and hair growing out of it?”

  After the exam was finished, Dr. Taylor had opened the door to find Zep pacing outside like a caged bull. Once across the threshold, he’d planted himself beside the exam table with his face scrunched up like he’d just sucked on a lemon.

  I tossed a smirk at him. “You want our baby delivered by the Wicked Witch of the West?” When he didn’t answer, I scrubbed the heel of my palm against my forehead and tried on a diff
erent approach. “Look, Dr. Taylor is the best. This is purely professional. Obstetricians are immune to naked women. You’ve seen one vagina, you’ve seen them all.”

  A flash of irritation crossed his face. “It’s only yours I’m concerned with, and I don’t buy that shit. A man is still a man, and biology is still biology.”

  “You’re impossible.”

  “I can’t help that I’m worried about you and our baby.”

  “Don’t be.”

  “Right. I shouldn’t breathe or wake up in the morning, either. Addie, you’re carrying my baby. This push and pull between us was mildly entertaining before, but this isn’t about us anymore. We don’t matter.” Laying a hand across my exposed stomach, he gently caressed the delicate dome of my baby bump. “This is all that matters.” Shifting, his other fingers found their way into my hair and wound around the long strands. Tilting my head back, he brushed my lips without kissing me.

  It wasn’t enough for either one of us. Within seconds, we were a tangle of lips and heat, his fingers tightening against the back of my head while mine gripped a handful of his T-shirt. Zep and I were never able to deny each other before, and even a kiss wasn’t immune to the pull between us.

  Angling my face toward him, he tasted me furiously, tracing my lips before diving back in and ripping me apart with his need. My body always responded to him, but as his large palm lovingly cupped my belly, a switch flipped inside me, and his devouring kisses only fanned the flame.

  “Addie, we need to stop,” he mumbled in between frantic kisses.

  “Why?” I knew exactly why, but couldn’t give a rat’s ass. My hormones had me in such an uproar that I willed the hand resting on my belly lower while inching up the table.

  “Fuck,” Moving his hand lower, he groaned against my lips, and then as soon as the door opened, he shot up like a cannon. “That’s why,” he rasped, adjusting his obvious erection as an overly perky blonde woman wheeled the ultrasound machine in the room.