I had already turned away, hurrying down the hall before he could catch up to me. “Thanks, but I think I got it,” I told him over my shoulder, and darted down the stairs.
As quickly as possible, I found Ember and, feigning a stomach bug, I made my excuses and escaped into the night. Just as I’d reached the door, struggling to pull on my jacket and thinking I’d made a clean escape, Juni found me.
“I’m sorry to hear you aren’t feeling well.” Juni looked genuinely sympathetic, which at that moment only succeeded in making me angrier. Of course she felt bad for me, when I was only leaving because my feelings for her date had just become all too apparent to me.
“I’ll be fine,” I insisted, and when she tried to say something more, I just turned and walked out the door. I think she was offering to walk me home when I shut the door in her face.
Instantly, I felt awful for being rude, and it wasn’t like I’d wanted to be rude. I just needed space, a moment without Ridley clouding my thoughts and emotions, where I could breathe and focus on what really mattered.
By the time I reached my place, I was nearly jogging. Instead of going up to my loft apartment, I went to the barn below. Many of the Tralla horses neighed their greetings as I walked past them, but I was on a mission and I went down to the final stall, where “my” horse, Bloom, was waiting.
He wasn’t really mine, because all of the horses belonged to the King and Queen. But Bloom and I had a special relationship. As soon as he saw me, he stretched his long neck out over the door and let out a delighted snort. He buried his snout in my hair, sniffing at me as I opened the stall door.
“I’m happy to see you too, buddy,” I said, running my hands over him. His thick silver fur felt like satin under my fingers. I grabbed his bridle from the wall, and he happily let me slip it on over his head.
Usually I would brush him or pet him more, but I wanted to get out of here. I needed to feel the wind blowing through my hair. I led Bloom out of the stables, and he followed behind me, his massive hooves clomping loudly on the ground.
I didn’t bother saddling him, but the reins were necessary. His long mane was far too soft and glossy to properly grip, and Bloom had a bad habit of stopping and starting quickly. That’s why they rarely used him in the parades or to pull carriages, despite the fact that he was one of the most beautiful Tralla horses I’d ever seen. His body was an illustrious silver that shimmered in the light like platinum. Long bangs from his mane fell into his blue eyes, and his mane, tail, and the fur covering his hooves were a beautiful snowy white.
Bloom was a happy, friendly horse, but he loved speed. For an animal with his bulk and girth, one would think he’d be slow and clunky. But Bloom was light on his feet and astonishingly fast.
He headed over to the fence, walking in front of me, and he waited patiently until I came up beside him. I had to climb up on the wooden rails of the fence to climb onto Bloom, since he was so tall.
As soon as he felt me settled in, he lunged forward without waiting for a command from me. Fortunately, I knew that was how Bloom worked, so I already had the reins gripped tightly in my hands, and Bloom raced forward. The gate was open, so he ran out to the open road, running toward the wall.
That’s where I usually rode him—along the wall that surrounded Doldastam. It gave him a long, clear path to run as fast as his thick legs would take us. And that was just what I needed. The wind stung my skin and made my hair whip back behind me, so I leaned forward, burying my face in Bloom’s neck and urging him to go faster.
I closed my eyes, and it was just me and Bloom. Any thoughts about Ridley or Konstantin or anything else at all just fell away.
TWELVE
anniversary
The anniversary party was even worse than I’d feared.
An insane number of stuffy royals filled up the ballroom. The last time I’d seen this many people in the palace, it had been at the celebration after the Trylle had defeated the Vittra, and that hadn’t exactly gone well.
At least that time it had been mostly regular Kanin folks, living it up and getting drunk. It actually had been a rather fun affair, until Konstantin Black ruined it. But this party was all Markis and Marksinna and Kings and Queens. Everyone dressed in their best, holding their heads up so they could look down on everyone else.
I was to spend the evening as Linus Berling’s shadow, and that was both a curse and a blessing. He wasn’t smug or pompous, so that was refreshing, but being stuck at his side meant that I had to spend far too much time listening to other royals issue backhanded compliments and mutter all sorts of derogatory remarks under their breath.
The dinner service began with King Evert and Queen Mina being seated at the main table in the center of the ballroom. All the guests waited in a procession to enter the ballroom, and as they did, the King’s personal guard announced who they were and where they were from. Then they would greet the King and Queen and head to their own table.
As King Evert’s cousins and closest friends, the Berlings were right at the front of the line—only entering behind King Loki and Queen Wendy of the Trylle; King Mikko, Queen Linnea, and King Mikko’s brother Prince Kennet of the Skojare; and Queen Sara of the Vittra. The Omte Queen had declined to attend, but that was fairly standard for the Omte.
While Linus and his parents were seated beside the King, I had to stand behind Linus. I of course couldn’t actually eat with them. I was only there to whisper in Linus’s ear, telling him the names, titles, and tribes of the royals who were coming to greet us at the table.
Once all the guests were seated and dinner was served, I was allowed to duck away and sneak back to sit with other trackers. Ember, Tilda, Ridley, and Simon were all seated together at a round table in the corner, and Tilda had been nice enough to save a spot for me between her and Ridley. I didn’t really want to sit next to him, at least not right now, but I didn’t have a lot of options.
Tilda must’ve known that because she offered me an apologetic smile and a shrug of her shoulders.
For tonight, being a tracker was a much sweeter gig than being on the Högdragen. They all stood at attention in their black velvet uniforms around the edge of the room. Some were near the doors, some stood behind the royalty, and the rest just lined the walls.
We didn’t even have to wear our uniforms tonight. I’d chosen a white and black lace dress with cap sleeves, not only because I thought it was beautiful, but because it allowed easy flexibility for kicking and punching. I actually found that short dresses were much less constraining in fights than jeans or tracker uniforms.
The Kanin trackers were only really here as backup, on the off chance one of the visiting tribes decided to start something tonight, while the Trylle and Vittra brought along trackers for the same reason. The Skojare didn’t have trackers, but they had their own bodyguards, who were seated one table down from us.
“Is it weird for you?” Ember asked. She leaned on the table, but her eyes were looking over my head at the Skojare guards behind me.
A glass of red wine had been waiting at my place at the table, along with a plate of steamed vegetables, and I took a sip of the wine before answering her. “What do you mean?”
“Not being the only blonde here anymore,” Ember said, and though I knew she didn’t mean anything by it, I still bristled a little.
“She’s not the only one. Her mom is blond too,” Tilda reminded her.
“It’s kind of nice, actually,” I admitted and set my glass back on the table. “Just blending in with everyone else.”
I glanced over at the Skojare. They ranged from nearly albino in complexion, with porcelain skin and platinum hair, to pale beige and golden, closer to my and my mother’s appearance. But even looking around the room, it was a veritable rainbow of trollkind.
The Kanin actually had the darkest complexions of all the trolls, with the Trylle, the Vittra, and the Omte looking fairer in comparison. I’d never been able to even remotely blend in with the Kanin, but for
the first time in a long while I didn’t stand out like sore thumb.
“Really?” Ridley cocked his head and looked over at me, while I stared down at my plate of food and stabbed at a bit of broccoli. “I thought you always liked standing out in a crowd.”
“Just because I always do doesn’t mean that I like it,” I told him flatly.
“I know you hate it, but I’ve always loved your hair.” Ember reached across the table, gently touching a lock of hair that hung free from the updo I’d put it in. “It’s beautiful, and it suits you.”
“Are you petting her?” Tilda wrinkled her nose and pushed Ember’s arm down. “She’s not a cat, Ember.”
As trackers, we were the lowest priority when it came to getting food, so when we had just gotten our second course—a squash stew that was meant to be served hot and thick but had grown cold and had been watered down to stretch it by the time it got to us—the Kings and Queens had already finished their meal.
King Evert stood up, clinking his glass to draw attention to himself. The chatter among the guests died down, replaced by the sound of chairs sliding against the wooden floor as everyone turned to look at him.
Most of the room was lit by candles on the tables and filling the massive iron chandeliers that hung from the ceiling, and while everyone could see, it was somewhat dim. But a bright electric bulb shone above the head table like a spotlight, and when the King stood up, the silver and diamonds on his tall crown glimmered like a disco ball. He wore the white suit he’d gotten married in, and it reminded me of what a Disney prince would wear, only with far more jewels and adornments, making it even more cartoonish than the actual cartoons.
“I want to thank you all for coming out tonight.” Evert spoke loudly, so his voice would carry throughout the cavernous ballroom. I could hear it surprisingly well, even tucked away in the corner. “I know some of you have traveled great distances to be here with us, celebrating this special night with my wife and I, and we want to thank you all.
“I’ve never been much for public speaking, but I know my wife has a few words she’d like to say.” He smiled and gestured to Queen Mina, who stood up next to him.
The bodice of her white gown was covered in so many diamonds I wasn’t sure how she was able to move in it. Not to mention her jewelry. Her necklace was covered in such massive rocks, I wouldn’t be surprised if it weighed ten pounds or more.
“As the King said, we both want to thank you all for joining us,” Mina said. Her voice was softer, but she managed to project it well.
I’d heard her speak many times before, and I’d come to notice that when she talked in private, like in the meeting on Thursday, she had a normal Kanin accent. But when she spoke now, in front of larger crowds, she suddenly had a mild British accent, as if that would make her sound more proper somehow.
“Over the past five years, I have had the pleasure of being your Queen and Evert’s bride.” She smiled broadly when she spoke, and her hands were folded neatly over her abdomen. “And I can honestly say that these past five years have been far happier and far greater than I ever could’ve imagined.
“Growing up in Iskyla, I could only dream of a life like this,” she went on. “For those of you that may be unfamiliar with Iskyla, it’s a small Kanin village that’s even farther north than Doldastam, so it’s even colder and more isolated, if you can believe that.”
This was met with a few chuckles, especially from other Kanins who knew of Iskyla. I’d never been there before, but most people hadn’t. From what I’d heard about it, it didn’t have any modern amenities like electricity or working phones. Plus, it was in the Arctic.
“My parents died when I was very young, but I still dreamed of getting out. I just knew that I was destined for something more,” Queen Mina told us all emphatically. “Then, in the cold dead of winter five years ago, I was invited to a ball in this very room, as were so many of you, though I didn’t expect much.”
The ball Mina referred to had been actually very Cinderella-esque, as was much of her life, apparently. King Evert’s predecessor, his cousin Elliot Strinne, had died rather suddenly with no wife or immediate heirs. This had led to a heated exchange among the royalty, with some lobbying for Elliot’s young niece to take the throne, before the Chancellor finally decided that the then-twenty-three-year-old Evert would be more suited to rule the kingdom than a child.
After Evert had been King for ten years and still had no bride and no heirs, the leaders had begun to worry. They didn’t want to put the kingdom in turmoil, the way it had been after Elliot’s death. So they set up a ball where the eligible women were to come to meet the King, and that’s how Mina met Evert.
“That night was like a fairy tale.” Mina smiled and touched her husband’s shoulder. “The instant I laid eyes on him, I was in love. Luckily for me, he felt the same way. Four short months later, we were wed. Every day since then has been the happiest day of my life, and I can only hope that the next five years of marriage will be just as magical as the first.”
She beamed down at King Evert, giving him a look so sweet and adoring that it was almost uncomfortable to watch. And then, quietly, almost too quietly for us to hear, she said, “I am so grateful for you, my love.”
Since that seemed to be the end of her speech, the crowd applauded warmly for her, and she offered us all a wide smile before sitting back down next to her husband.
“She’s lying,” Ridley said as he clapped halfheartedly for her. “She doesn’t love him.”
“Why do you say that?” Ember asked.
He shook his head and went back to spooning the now-freezing-cold stew. “Nobody loves anybody that much.”
“And here you were going on and on about true love last night,” I said, surprised by the bitter edge of my own words.
“Was I?” He lifted his head, resting his eye on me, and I quickly turned back toward my own stew. “I remember saying something about settling down, but nothing about true love.”
“Same thing,” I mumbled.
“I don’t know. Some people love each other that much,” Ember insisted. “I think the Trylle King and Queen are super into each other.”
“I’m not saying that people don’t fall in love. People fall madly in love with each other all the time. But that right there”—Ridley gestured behind him, toward where King Evert and Queen Mina were seated—“that was all an act.”
“I think you’re right,” Tilda agreed, talking about the royalty in a way that was unusual for her. When I looked at her in surprise, she shrugged one shoulder simply and took a sip of her water. “Well, he is right. She was a small-town girl with big dreams, and marrying into money and royalty was her way to get what she wanted.”
“That’s all I’m saying.” Ridley leaned back in his seat, a self-satisfied grin on his face. Since Tilda so rarely chimed in on matters like this, having her on his side seemed like a boon.
“Good for her, then,” I replied glibly.
“Good for her?” Ember laughed. “You think it’s good that she tricked the King?”
“She didn’t trick him,” I corrected her. “He needed a beautiful wife to bear him children, and that’s what he got. Well, no kids yet, but she’s still young. She wanted to make a better life for herself, and she found a way. Maybe not the way that you or I would’ve chosen, but it was one way to do it.”
“Would you do that?” Ridley asked. “Would you marry someone you didn’t love to advance your life or your career?”
“No, of course I wouldn’t,” I said.
“Would you even marry someone if you did love them?” he asked. I could feel his eyes on me, but I refused to look at him, preferring to finish my wine in big gulps.
Before I could answer, Evert announced that it was time for the dance, and waiters came out to start clearing the tables and moving them out of the way so there would be more room for people to dance.
Then I didn’t have time to worry about Ridley’s questions or the way his eyes
seemed to look straight through me. I had to hurry and help the waiters take our plates away, and then I was on my feet with the other trackers, helping to stack chairs and push tables to the side of the room.
But that was just as well, because I had no idea how I would answer.
THIRTEEN
impropriety
At the end of the ballroom, a small orchestra played a mix of contemporary human music along with Kanin folk songs. A singer accompanied them, and she had a pristine voice with an operatic range. The songs would segue seamlessly from the Beatles to a Kanin love ballad, sung entirely in its original low Swedish, and then would switch to a beautiful rendition of Adele.
It was still early in the evening, so the dance floor was relatively full. Most couples swayed to the music, but some glided across the floor with the elegant, practiced steps that came from years of training. The royalty, especially those from Doldastam, lived pampered, sheltered lives with much free time on their hands, so many of them took up ballroom dancing to fill the time.
As the newest returning changeling and one of the highest-ranking Markis, Linus attracted a lot of attention, and his dance card was full. While he could be clumsy, and did trip over his own feet a few times, his dance partners didn’t seem to mind.
I watched him from the sidelines, ready to swoop in if he needed me, but he seemed to be doing okay on his own. His dance moves might have been lacking, but he made up for it by being nice and rather charming, in an unassuming kind of way.
Tilda and Ember didn’t have any charges to watch out for, so they were free to hang out with me, standing along the wall at the edge of the dance floor. Tilda wore a short flapper-esque dress that showed off her long legs, and as she swayed, the silver tassels would swing and bounce along with her. Even though we were supposed to be standing at attention at the side of the ballroom, Tilda couldn’t help herself. She loved to dance far too much. With her eyes closed, her head tilted back slightly, letting her long brown hair flow behind her, she moved gracefully in time with the music.
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