Dark Time

by Summer Cooper

  I paid the bill and went back to the resort to look it over. The designer had promised to have some ideas for me soon enough, and I’d go from there. I wanted something spectacular, but not tacky. I went to the main office, a hidden room at the very back of the reception area, and picked up a set of keys. I rode the elevator to the very top floor and went into the penthouse there.

  Glass everywhere, and the movers had been in. The kitchen, laundry room, and the bedroom were ready. Good. There was no pool on the top of this building, but I could install a hot tub or something later. For now, I wanted to make this place my own and get out of the one I’d rented. I wanted it to be a surprise for Emily.

  I’d ordered paintings for the walls and a few other items that would add decoration. I’d spent the earliest part of my life in bleak, almost empty rooms, and I’d kept the habit when I became an adult. I wanted her to see how much of a change she’d made in my life, and had decided the best way to do that was to ask her to pick out the china pattern I’d buy for the penthouse. I wanted her to have a part in the decoration.

  She’d made a liar out of me, and I knew now that the man who didn’t do relationships was deep into one he didn’t want to end. I knew she was going to be a part of my life for a long time, if I didn’t scare her off. I couldn’t get enough of waking up to her, or the way her lips tasted after she’d sipped her apple juice. I wanted her to know that now.

  Slowly, it had to be slowly, so neither of us would get spooked, but eventually, I thought this could go a lot further than a casual ‘we’re dating’ scenario. I was afraid, I could admit that to myself, because she could totally destroy me if this went much further. At the same time, it was one of the biggest challenges of my life.

  I’d even told my parents about her. That had been a shocker for both of us, believe me. I’d never mentioned a female to them before, and I had to laugh now. I bet they thought I was gay. They’d been delighted when I told them about Emily, and so pleased that I was taking that chance.

  It felt good to know I had someone to come home to and that they looked forward to meeting. It felt even better to slip into bed with her, mmm, especially when she was warm and asleep. She’d wrap herself around me in total abandon and make me feel like I was the strongest man alive, because she felt safe with me.

  It was that, perhaps, that kept me humble. Because, as much as I was afraid of being hurt by her, she was just as afraid that I’d hurt her.

  I closed up the penthouse and went down to the car. A call came in, and I answered it.

  “Hi, Dylan, sorry to be a bother, but we have a situation out here at the San Diego hotel, and we need you here.” I heard the main manager’s voice and sighed. This didn’t happen frequently, so I knew the manager had only called me as a last resort.

  “What’s up, Amanda?” I started the car and pulled out of the parking garage as she told me about the issue at hand. She was right, I’d need to go out there and sort it.

  “I’ll fly out tomorrow. It can wait until then. Thanks for contacting me, Amanda. I have every confidence in your decision-making abilities, but this needs my attention. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  She said goodbye with relief in her voice, and I had to shake my head. I didn’t see much point in terrorizing my employees, as I’d hired them for a reason. Amanda was more than capable, and I hadn’t lied, I was confident in her. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have had the position.

  I made my way home to Emily at last. She wasn’t happy that I’d be leaving again so soon, but she understood. I took her to bed, and she decided to forgive me after I’d made her come a few times with my tongue.

  It was later, as we prepared my luggage together, that I finally asked her the question that had been on my mind.

  “Emily, will you move into the new place with me?” I turned to look at her and saw surprise on her face.

  “What else would I do, Dylan?” She moved up to me and put her arms around my waist. “You wanted me here. I took it for granted you’d want me there too.”

  “No, I mean really move in with me. As in, let your old place go and plan to stay for a while?” I felt a little nervous, because this baby step felt like a giant leap.

  “Alright.” She gave me a calm smile, and her eyes looked up at me with happiness.

  “That’s all I get, alright? Sheesh, woman!” I hugged her close, happy despite the lack of screeching joy.

  “Well, I live with you already. It’s just to a new place, right?” She pulled back to look at me again.

  “No. I want … well, I want you to choose the china, the extra little touches, you know, the things that make a place a home?” I watched her until realization dawned. When it did, her eyes went round.

  “Oh. Dylan!” She hugged me, and I breathed in relief. At last she got it. I wanted a home, not just a place to live.

  This was a new step for both of us. I thought Emily was more prepared for those steps than I was, but she wasn’t the kind to push someone into a decision. Unless that decision concerned her own life. She’d pushed me to go beyond a contract, and for a while, I fought against it. Now, I was glad she had. She fought for what she’d wanted, for what she thought was right, and it was one more thing that assured me she was on my side in all things. I could trust her.

  We went back to packing my bags, and when we turned the lights off and went to bed, I thought about how much my life had changed because of her. I would miss her over the next few days, and that made me pull her closer. I had an early flight, but I didn’t care. I needed her again.

  She climbed over me eagerly and took me deep inside the best pussy I’ve ever slid into. It was no contest. If I could only ever fuck one person on earth again, it would be Emily. The way her walls clenched around me, pulled me deeper inside, was something incredible that I didn’t want to give up. That wasn’t the only reason I wanted Emily in my life. It was a very distracting reason, though, and when she tilted her head back and really started to grind down on me, I lost all train of thought. There was only Emily, and that was all that mattered.

  Emily

  I’d wanted to go to San Diego with Dylan, but he’d told me he’d be busy the entire time he was there and didn’t want to leave me sitting in a hotel without him there to take me around. I knew he was right. I wouldn’t really want to go see the sights without him, but it would have been better than being here, bored silly.

  I tapped my nails on the kitchen table and decided to go out. I called Roxie, and she wasn’t busy, so we went out to have our nails done, our usual ritual. When I picked her up and she got in the car, my frown turned upside down, as silly as that sounded.

  “You just make me smile, do you know that?” I leaned over and bumped my head near hers. We shared an intimacy I’d never experienced with another female, not even Jesse. A sisterly intimacy, and I knew we’d be friends for life. She’d be there for me, no matter what, or who came along.

  “Girl, you know I love you. Come on now, let’s get this done and over with. You know I hate those drill things they use.” Roxie shivered but smiled at me and gave me a wink.

  We spent the day giggling and talking about how life was for each of us. I ended up buying more of those panties that Dylan liked so much, a few pairs in different colors, as well as some other things he’d get to tear off me when he got home.

  “I’m so glad things are working out for you, Emily. I was kind of nervous about it all, but something told me you two needed each other,” she said as we both gobbled down salads smothered in ranch dressing and ham bits. It was one of my favorite indulgences, even if salad was meant to be a nutritional food.

  “I guess you were right, Roxie. He’s changed my world, and I think I’ve started to change his. He asked me to pick out the china for his new place!” She looked at me oddly, and I wanted to explain why that was so important, but that was Dylan’s story to tell. So I settled for the ordinary reasons. “It means he wants me to be part of his life in the future, Rox…”

&nb
sp; “Ohhhh!” She grinned, and her eyes went wide. “That is a good thing then!”

  “It is.” I took a deep breath and stared out at the beach beyond the glass. It was winter now, too rainy and cold to sit outside, but it was still nice to watch the waves coming in. “I think I love him, but I’m afraid to, you know?”

  “That’s understandable, under the circumstances. He’s your first, Emily.” She reached out, her hand over mine. “Dylan’s something special, I think. You can’t let that go because of fear.”

  She paused and looked away for a moment, as if to decide something. I could see she made her mind up, and she began to speak again.

  “We’ve had different lives, Ems, and you might have had a privileged life, but from where I sit, I sometimes think, despite the shit I dealt with, that I had the better life. I wasn’t sold a lie. You were. Then they tried to take a future away from you. You have the chance to take that back with both fists. You need to cling to it, keep it close to yourself, until you know what life is about. You deserve that, girl.”

  “I understand.” I wasn’t mad, which was what I guessed she’d been worried about, but Roxie had always been blunt with me. It wasn’t cruelty; it was her way of saying she cared.

  “You want to watch movies and eat ice cream with me tonight?” I asked, knowing I’d be alone tonight too. Poor Dylan was in some kind of mess out there in California, so I’d left him to deal with it.

  “I would like that.”

  “Wow? Really?” I was excited, she usually said she had to work.

  “Yeah, I’ve decided to take a night off. Fuck ‘em, they can handle shit without me.”

  I got an idea when she said that. The stores had bombarded us for ages now with Christmas music and decorations, even the restaurant had a tree up, while our apartment was bare. I’d already decided to let mine go and would clear it out once Dylan’s new place was ready, our new place, but that would be weeks from now.

  “Let’s go to the store first,” I said with a wicked grin, and she looked at me.

  “What have you got planned now, my dear?”

  “You’ll see. Come on, hurry up.” We paid our bill and left, and then I drove us to another store.

  We nearly cleaned the place out of Christmas decorations, and it took some doing, but we got a Christmas tree in the car and managed to get it up to the apartment with the help of a security guard from downstairs. We both giggled when we got in and started to unpack bags and boxes.

  “Are you sure Dylan won’t mind?” Roxie asked as she hung some silver decorations on the tree.

  “I don’t know,” I said and paused as I hung a wreath on the wall with a removable hanger. “He’s not religious, but he hasn’t said he hates Christmas or anything.”

  “Hmm. I know this much, if my partner had gone through this much trouble to surprise me, I would not complain.” She went back to hanging ornaments, and I tried not to laugh.

  We had so many lights on the tree, I thought we could act as a beacon for airplanes, but it was pretty, and later, when we turned the lights off, the living room looked like a Christmas wonderland. I even had a tiny little Christmas village on a side table.

  “Oh, it’s so pretty!” I whispered. When I was young, my parents paid someone to decorate our house for Christmas, and I’d never had the chance to decorate a tree or a house of my own. Later, wherever I went was home, and I was never invited for the decorating or things like that. So this was the first time I’d ever decorated a tree, and I was proud of it. I couldn’t wait for Dylan to see it.

  He’d either hate it, or he’d love that I’d done it. I had a feeling it would be the latter. He always went to an effort to thank me when I did something for him, which was often. Roxie and I settled down to watch movies and eat ice cream, as we’d planned, and it was fun. We didn’t do it often enough.

  I broke out a bottle of wine, and we watched some more movies. Before long, she was asleep on the couch, and I left her there. I went into the kitchen and hung up the kitchen towels I’d bought, and set a plate down on the counter. It was the pattern I’d chosen for our new place.

  Maybe it was a bit old fashioned, but I’d loved the rose petals and the gold edging. It was maybe even a little tacky, not modern at all, but I wanted something that expressed my tastes in that place, something that said I lived there too. I wanted something that was different, colorful, so I’d chosen the pattern.

  Dylan would accept it, because I wanted it, and I smiled because I was confident in him now. We might not be quite at the stage where we were planning our wedding or picking out baby names, but we were both making an attempt at being grownups with real relationships.

  I sat in the kitchen and realized just how lucky I was. Things might not have been completely solid with Dylan, but they were as solid as they could be, and in the living room I had a real friend. One who wanted what was best for me, not what she thought I wanted to hear so that I’d just shut up and watch her kids. Which might be a little unfair to my sisters-in-law. They were so enamored with their husbands, kids, and lives that I was just a background, no different to other people in their lives.

  I kind of envied that kind of love. It was something I wanted with Dylan, and I had to admit, he consumed my thoughts now. For once, I didn’t feel bad about that. He was truly amazing to me, and he deserved the love I could give him. He’d allowed his adoptive parents to love him, but he hadn’t let anyone else into his life. Until me.

  I had to make sure I continued to deserve that chance. I’d nearly messed it up when I didn’t tell him who I was before he found out. The second I’d walked out the door I’d felt the world begin to collapse. Then he’d come after me, and there’d been a pause in that destruction. Then we went to the mountains, and he’d given me snow.

  Then there’d been a few dark days, when I’d started to worry about him, but he’d worked it out, and now we were closer than ever. That wasn’t a bad thing.

  I got up, walked into the glow of the living room, and wondered if I’d gone overboard. I was certain I had, but oh well. It was my first Christmas on my own. I could go a little wild, surely? I turned the lights off, covered Roxie up, and touched her cheek. She had given me so much, and it touched me how she’d fallen asleep so quickly. She’d had it rough lately, and she’d been working her ass off, obviously. She’d still be awake normally, so at least I could give her some rest.

  I went to the bedroom and scrolled around online, looking for a Christmas present for Dylan. I wanted something that would make him smile. What could it be? He wasn’t a gaming console kind of guy, he was too busy to play games. The only jewelry he’d ever worn was the jewelry I bought him.

  Hmmm. I did a search for gifts for men, but everybody thought their products made great gifts for men. I didn’t think plumbing pipes were that great of a gift, but a woman selling handmade knitted sweaters caught my eye. I found a few things in her online shop that I liked. A gray cable-knit sweater, some gloves, and a hat in the same yarn, all went into my basket.

  I could give him a hug for hours in that sweater, I thought with a goofy grin. Or at least give him the feeling of being hugged, which was corny, but fuck it. They weren’t cheap presents, and I paid extra for quick delivery. I found a few other things that I liked on other shops and bought those too. Soon, I’d have presents to go under the tree.

  I felt almost like a kid again, only this time, the big kid was able to really act on her instincts. When I was younger I always had to be so proper, I was never allowed to misbehave, and after a while, it never occurred to me. When other girls were going bad and acting wild, I stayed at home and did whatever was needed of me. Maybe part of me felt a little guilty about Trent, that he’d lost his real mother and he’d had to deal with us. For a long time I felt like I owed him more because of that. Now? He could fuck off.

  I’d paid him back a thousand times for what he’d lost, and for real, he could have seen us as gifts, but he’d just pouted. Now? Well? I might have had
an extra glass of wine to prove that I could do what I wanted to. I was a grown fucker, I’d do what I’d want.

  I laughed loudly, but smothered it when I remembered Roxie was in the living room. I put some Enrique Iglesias on my phone, plugged in my earbuds, and began to dance around my bedroom like a lunatic. Can you blame me? I was one happy woman and had a lot to look forward to. For the first time in my life, I was truly free and almost wild.

  I had given up an entire family, for one man, but I was getting far more from the deal than that. I got my freedom, I got to be me, even if I was only learning who that was now. I had a lot to be happy about, and some dancing seemed to be in order for the occasion.

  Dylan

  I arrived at the penthouse ready to tear Emily’s clothes off and fuck her until neither of us could hold our heads up. I’d made a stop in Kansas to pick up some test results, and I hadn’t really wanted to spend too much time thinking about what the doc said, so I’d fantasized about her the whole way back on the plane. I was more than ready for her when the elevator doors opened on my floor.

  Maybe I should have called her to let her know I’d be home today. I wasn’t sure how long I was going to spend in Kansas, and I hadn’t wanted to tell her about that trip. As a result, my coming home was a surprise. As soon as I opened the door, I knew I should have called her.

  The whole place smelled like a Christmas extravaganza of gingerbread cookies and peppermint candy. When I made it out of the hallway I found out why. I was completely shocked to find the living room a Christmas wonderland, right down to a very large tree filled to the brim with decorations.

  I walked into the kitchen and then the bathroom and found those had been decorated too. Even our bed had winter-themed sheets and a comforter on them. I grinned as I thought about how she must have worked really hard to get all of this done. It was almost too much, but I could see the childlike enthusiasm that had gone into it. This was a person who had finally been allowed to do just as she’d pleased when it came to Christmas decorations, and she’d done it well.