by Leta Blake
As the afternoon waned and darkness crept in, Casey cued up the live action version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas. They sprawled and laughed, holding each other close. The lights on the tree and the yellow glow outside from the rising moon lent a softness to the room that seeped into Casey, leaving him so warm and comfortable—so happy—that he never wanted the night to end. So long as he stayed right here, he wouldn’t have to face his parents or negotiate a future. They could be content.
When Joel got up to grab a couple of beers, he stopped in his tracks, his gaze glued to something outside the living room window. “Holy shit.”
Casey tensed, leaping up, Bruno immediately on guard too. God, was it Casey’s parents? He wasn’t ready for this confrontation. Couldn’t he and Joel just have their Christmas in peace? “What?” He joined Joel at the window and gasped out loud. “Whoa.”
The snow that had been flurries earlier was sticking, lining tree limbs in white and covering the grass.
“No way,” Joel said. “A white Christmas? In Tennessee? This is crazy.”
“It’s a sign.” Casey grinned, his heart full.
“A sign that climate change is real? Yeah.”
Casey rolled his eyes, and they laughed as Bruno shot out of the dog door again and bounced around, leaping to catch snowflakes in his giant maw. They put on their coats and shoes and joined him, making snow angels by the colorful lights strung along the trailer.
When they were soaked, with fat snowflakes caught in their hair, they hurried back inside, leaving Bruno to run around as much as he liked. Shivering, they stripped to their boxers and hung their wet clothes in the bathroom. Casey was relieved they’d left the space heaters on high so the trailer was warm and toasty.
Joel let out a long breath. He reached out for Casey as though seeking comfort. He pressed his whole body against Casey, tucking his head beneath Casey’s chin and holding on tight.
Skin against skin aside from their boxers, Casey wrapped him up in his arms and rubbed his cheek across the top of Joel’s head. He wanted to kiss him again but wasn’t sure if that’s what Joel was going for or not.
“C’mon,” Joel said, breaking away and pulling Casey toward the living room. “We almost forgot presents. I’ve got something for you. Something special.”
Casey sat on the sofa and gestured toward the box he’d put under the tree earlier when Joel was away. “I have something for you too.”
Joel distributed the gifts—two for Casey and one for Joel. Casey immediately wished he’d spent more on Joel. At the time, he hadn’t wanted to go overboard or make Joel feel stingy, so he’d just bought the one thing. But now he wished he had more.
“Go first,” Casey said. “I got it for you yesterday. I hope you like it.”
Joel opened the gift and grinned, holding up the gold glitter-dusted tin star. “It’s perfect. Thanks.”
“Do you really like it? No pressure.”
Joel stood up and placed it on top of the tree, going up on his tiptoes to do it. “It looks great. Perfect, like I said. Thank you.”
Casey let out a breath of relief. It could have been worse. Joel seemed to genuinely like the star. He stood beside the tree and admired it for a minute before clapping his hands together and sitting by Casey again. Casey loved the way the Christmas lights played on Joel’s pale skin.
“Okay, your turn. Open the big one first.”
Casey worked open the tape and shoved back the paper to reveal a miniature Blow Mold Nativity set, about one-fourth the size of the one in Mr. Maples’s yard or Joel’s store. “Is this…?”
“So you can kiss Mary every year.” Joel laughed.
Casey grinned. “I’d rather kiss you every year.”
Joel shrugged. “I’d be okay with that.”
Casey’s heart somersaulted. “Do you mean it?”
“Yeah.”
“I was an idiot to kiss Mary instead of you.”
“Yeah, well, we were both idiots back then. I’d say I was worse with all the bullshit stories about making out with girls and trying to keep you at arm’s length.”
“I get it. You were scared. It was for your safety.”
“It was.” Joel shrugged, his shoulders rising and falling. “Anyway, I grabbed that from the stock at the store. I thought it’d make you laugh, and it’s small enough to fit in your place in New York. Or wherever you end up.”
Casey looked around the living room. “It’d look pretty good in that corner.”
“Yeah, like I said.” Joel scratched at his eyebrow with his thumb, but he spoke clearly despite his shaking voice. “Wherever you end up.”
Casey smiled. “Thank you.”
Joel tapped the smaller package. “And now that one.”
Casey opened the gift and stared down at a black jewelry box. “It’s… Is it?”
“Just open it.”
Casey pried it open and found inside a wide silver ring with a J imprinted within a circle on the middle. “What’s this?”
“My mom’s ring,” Joel said, a tense smile on his lips. “Her dad gave it to her. It was his ring originally. His name was James, and hers was Jennifer. I’m Joel, obviously, so she put it aside for me when I was just a little kid. She rarely wore it because it was so big, but there are a few shots of her with it on her thumb when I was a baby and she was still carrying some weight from the pregnancy.”
“I can’t take this.”
“Well, I’m not asking you to keep it forever, unless it works out that way. I’m giving it to you like a promise ring. So, when you go back to New York to graduate—because you will—you can look at the ring and know I’m right here waiting. That I belong with you. Okay?” Joel’s cheeks flushed. “Or is that too big of a thing?”
“No. I love it.” Casey never knew happiness could hurt so much, but damn if his heart wasn’t being carved out by sheer joy. He took the ring out of the box and slid it onto the ring finger of his left hand. It fit perfectly, which seemed to be an omen.
A good one. A freaking amazing one.
Casey flexed his hand in the light from the Christmas tree, studying the swoop of the J and the way the silver shone against his skin. “Thank you.”
“It’s okay?”
“It’s perfect. Whenever I look at my hand, I’ll think of you.”
Joel took hold of his fingers, stroking his thumb over the ring. “J for Joel’s. I’m staking my claim. For as long as you want me. If you decide to move on, you can just return the ring. I’ll live.” He didn’t sound like he’d live at all, though, with his voice vibrating so hard.
Casey laughed. “Dude, I just tried to move in with you. I don’t think you need to worry about me giving the ring back.”
“Good.”
“When did you change your mind? About us? About continuing on even if I go back to New York for school?”
Joel flushed. “I don’t know. Somewhere between overhearing your dad’s bullshit last night and walking away from my dad’s crap today, I realized that it’s too late. I’ve already gone all in with you. Fighting it just seems stupid now. And having your dick in my ass might have persuaded me, too.” Joel flushed. “I don’t know how I’m going to do without it, so…”
“Baby, you’ll never have to do without that. Never,” Casey said, tugging Joel closer. “Not so long as I’m around.”
“I…fuck, Casey, but I really want you around.”
Casey ran his hand down Joel’s chest, the metal of his new ring reflecting the Christmas tree’s lights across Joel’s pale skin. “Tell me how much.”
“So much. I…” Joel’s voice broke, but he went on. “I need you.”
Casey growled and jerked Joel into his arms. “Fuck, yes. I need you too. Let me show you.”
“Yes.”
“Let’s go to bed.”
Joel’s cock beat with his pulse, thudding on his quivering stomach as he tried to hold back the tears of pleasure that slipped out of his eyes. He wondered why he kept crying ev
ery time they did anything anally.
Rimming and being fucked broke him down in a way he could barely take but then craved again as soon as it was finished. It was embarrassing, but Casey’s gentle words and tender kisses made him feel okay about it, like maybe Casey took his emotional reaction as a compliment.
Casey thrust his cock in hard again, and Joel arched up, his legs shaking on Casey’s shoulders and his cock spurting pre-come onto his treasure trail, leaving a slick spot that his cockhead rubbed in with each involuntary hump of his hips.
“You’re beautiful,” Casey whispered, holding Joel’s wrists down against the mattress as he screwed him.
“You’re in so deep.”
“I’m in all the way.” He flexed so his balls slapped against Joel’s ass for emphasis. “You’ve got all of me. Do you feel me?”
“Fuck yes.” How was he supposed to feel anything else? With each drag out and hard thrust back in, Joel’s nipples pebbled and chills broke over his body. His eyes leaked more, and he moaned. Pleasure ricocheted through him, tightening his skin and making him shake like he was going to burst free from himself or maybe die if the goodness didn’t stop. But also like he’d tumble into an endless well of frustration and disappointment if it did.
“That’s good. Open up. Yeah. Like that.” Casey fucked into him harder, making his body jolt on the mattress and his cock bounce against his stomach.
“Oh God,” Joel moaned, tossing his head and clenching his hands in fists. His hole clenched and released around Casey’s dick, an uncontrollable rhythmic spasm that felt so good. He writhed, trying to hold back, to hold on, but orgasm was tightening in him, aching in his balls. He gasped, “Close. I’m close.”
Casey jerked his cock free of Joel’s ass, sweaty and panting, his gaze never leaving Joel’s face. Scrunching his eyes closed, Joel wailed, a shock of emptiness and loss rocking through him, and Casey squeezed his wrists hard against the mattress, before hushing his cry with a kiss. Then he pushed back in, slow, slow, slow, and Joel quivered under him, impatient and a little scared.
Releasing one arm, Casey took Joel’s cock in hand as they moved together, gazing down into his eyes. Shifting his legs to Casey’s hips, he dug in his heels, trying to get Casey in deeper and deeper.
“Fuck me,” he whimpered. “Hard.”
Casey did as Joel asked.
As the pummeling thrusts came, he couldn’t hold Casey’s gaze anymore. Laid bare and seen, loved and touched, taken and given to without reserve, Joel reached up for Casey, dragging him down for a kiss. He dissolved into the pounding bliss, the rhythm that gripped him and took him over inside and out. Thundering pulse, aching cock, and his hole gripping and releasing needily as Casey’s cock slammed in and out. Casey’s grunts grew louder and louder, the sound of their sex an echoing slap and moan around the room, and the bed shook hard.
Joel clawed at Casey’s shoulders, trying to grab hold and make it last, but the pleasure built and grew, his cock dragging between his stomach and Casey’s in a sweaty, hot press of friction. “Please,” he said, holding on. “More.”
Casey gripped his shoulders harder and shoved into him with a force that rolled Joel’s eyes up into his head. His balls drew up tight, and his legs clenched around Casey’s pumping waist. He reached down to take hold of his cock and stroke it, but he barely touched it before his pleasure exploded over him, in him, and out of him. He spasmed as he came, and a rough, haggard cry launched from his throat.
Casey shouted too, his cock swelling in Joel’s ass, and Joel felt the pumping of Casey filling the condom. He dragged Casey down for a kiss, moaning into his mouth and whimpering in exhausted, but somehow unsatisfied, need. Would he ever get enough? Now that he’d had Casey, had this love, he didn’t want to let it go. Ever let it go.
He held Casey inside as long as he could, and after Casey pulled out to dispose of the condom, Joel reached for him until Casey collapsed on top of him, sweaty and still huffing with exertion.
“You okay?” Casey whispered, touching where the tears still leaked from his eyes.
“I don’t know why it happens.”
Casey kissed his nose and mouth and then each eyelid. “Ann says crying just means you’re feeling something big. So long as it’s a good something, I don’t think we should worry about it.”
“It’s good.” Joel’s throat ached, and he squeezed Casey in closer. “Everything about this is good.”
Casey kissed him gently. “Let’s get some rest. I’m going to want to do that again later.”
“Yeah. Me too,” Joel admitted. He breathed in Casey’s scent and snuggled in close.
“Now do you see why people are so into it?”
“Only with you,” Joel murmured, closing his eyes as his body slowed its shaking and finally relaxed so he could sleep. “I still only want to do it with you.”
“Me too.” Casey kissed his hair before tenderly kissing the ring Joel had given him. “Me too, baby.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
The next morning, they rose to a winter wonderland by Tennessee standards. A foot and a half of snow covered the lawn and piled on tree branches sturdy enough to hold the weight. Bruno was delighted by it and dashed in and out of the dog door, tracking wet, muddy footprints all over the kitchen floor and hallway. Joel sighed and stared at them, thinking about how now he’d have to mop.
“He’s crazy about the snow,” Casey said, coming in from having gone out to piss on the bushes.
Joel wasn’t sure how much skunks really got out and about in the snow, but he didn’t bother telling Casey to urinate inside. He’d rather piss outside every day of the year than deal with Bruno covered in skunk stench ever again.
“What are your plans today?” Casey asked, rosy cheeked from the cold as he kicked off his boots and hung up his jacket.
“Gotta run to Vreeland’s for a few hours. We’re open at ten. We won’t have too many customers, but we’ll have some. And my assistant manager Brandon and I need to make sure Angel re-priced all the Christmas stuff for the sale and discuss what we’re going to stock for spring.”
“Ah.” Casey shifted uncomfortably.
“You going to hang out here or…?”
“I’ve agreed to see my parents this afternoon. My dad had to go into the office this morning.”
“His office downtown?”
“Yeah. I’m going to head over to the house early to pack up a few more things I left there. Talk to my mom. Feel her out about what to expect from my dad. And before that I’ll work some more on the book-marketing stuff. Speaking of, I need to get your approval on it so I can move forward, and get your password so I can upload the new covers and update your seller account. And I need to start a Facebook page, a Twitter account, an Instagram account, and—”
Joel shuddered. “Start whatever you want, but I’m not keeping up with it.”
“I’ll do it. Like I said, this is perfect for my project. I’ve even started a few spreadsheets for keeping track of any changes in sales.” Casey cocked his head. “Though some of the marketing has to be about the actual writer. People want to know things about you, Joel.”
“Start with the general marketing, and if that goes well, I’ll consider doing more, okay?”
Casey smiled, breaking out his laptop and pulling a sheaf of papers from his bags. “These are my plans. The main things I need your approval on are the covers, the branding designs, and the changes I’ve made to the blurbs. Getting those changed out, if you approve them, will take most of the morning.”
Joel looked through everything and was vaguely surprised that he didn’t hate any of it. He shouldn’t have been, though. Casey’s work in his sketchbooks of yore had always been impressive and well-considered. There was nothing he could really balk at, so he gave Casey a shaky smile and a mostly enthusiastic thumbs-up.
“Go for it.” He stood up, kissed Casey’s cheek, and grabbed his coat. “I’m going to be late if I don’t go. I have a few errands I need to run
first.”
Casey grinned up at him. “By the time you get home, I’ll have this all changed out.” Then his expression went a bit queasier. “And I’ll know what my folks have to say about everything. I’ll have a better idea of what the future holds.”
Joel touched Casey’s cheek, feeling the line between smooth skin and stubble with this thumb. “If it turns out they are stubborn assholes, you can stay here until we get things figured out. Maybe not technically move in, but I’m not going to leave you high and dry.”
“Thank you.”
“But it won’t come to that,” Joel murmured.
Casey shook his head. “No. I don’t think it will. Dad said a lot of things he’ll come to regret, if he doesn’t already. I don’t think he’ll really disown me.”
Joel nodded, lingering to feel the drag of stubble over his thumb for a few moments more before kissing Casey’s mouth. He broke away, groaning when Bruno darted back through the dog door bringing more snow with him.
“I’ll get it,” Casey said, indicating the footprints. “You go on to work.”
Joel nodded and left, his heart tripping and a new plan for his morning formulating in his head. He texted Brandon when he got to his truck, and once he was sure the store was taken care of, he headed off in the opposite direction instead. Just because he wasn’t going to have to field an uncomfortable meeting with his own father for the first morning in way too many years, didn’t mean he couldn’t choose to have an uncomfortable meeting with someone else’s father.
What would a morning be without one?
Downtown Knoxville glistened with frost as Joel gazed out from the wide windows of Jonathan Stevens’s sixteenth-story office. A tall, pretty woman named Aditi with dark brown skin and lush, wavy hair had led him here and asked him to wait while she located Mr. Stevens.