Soldier of Her Heart

by Syndi Powell

  “I put them on already. Sheesh. Calm down. You’d think you were the one getting hitched.”

  Andie pressed a hand to her chest, trying to calm the erratic beat of her heart. Her sister was right. She’d pass out if she kept up at this pace. “I only want things to be perfect for you.”

  “They already are with John waiting for me at the end of the aisle. So relax.” Cassie looked at herself in the floor-length mirror, a soft smile playing around her lips. “I look hot. He’s going to faint when he sees me.”

  Andie had to agree. She smoothed the sapphire blue satin of her own tea-length dress, then ran her left hand along the back of her head, checking for stray hairs that might have escaped the high bun. Why was she so nervous? Part of it was because she did want things to be perfect for Cassie, but another part wondered if Beckett would show up after all, although they hadn’t left things on a good note last week. Would he think she looked hot and faint too? Would he see her and change his mind about keeping distance between them?

  Cassie turned to look at her. “What’s wrong?”

  Andie waved off her question. This was Cassie’s day, and she wasn’t going to allow melancholy thoughts about Beckett to ruin it for her sister. “It’s nothing.”

  “Give me a break. You’ve been moping all morning.”

  “I’m fine. And I’m not moping.”

  “Liar.”

  Andie glared at her sister. “Why don’t you stay focused on getting through the ceremony and stop worrying about me?”

  “Because I want you to be as happy as I am.” Cassie walked toward her, the dress rustling with each step. “It’s Beckett, right?”

  “Like I said, it’s nothing.” He had made that very clear.

  A knock on the door brought both sisters to attention. Andie answered it to find their mother dressed in a soft gray sheath dress, her hair coiffed into soft waves around her face. “We have about ten minutes left, girls.” Their mother sighed at the sight of Cassie. “Oh, Cassandra. You’re beautiful.”

  “Now I know what it feels like to be Andie, if only for a day.” Cassie winked at her sister.

  “You’re definitely outshining me today.” She handed the simple but elegant bouquet of white roses to Cassie. “You ready for this?”

  “I’ve been ready since he asked me to marry him.”

  Andie fussed again with the hem, trying to get it to lay flat on the floor. Cassie scolded her. “It’s fine.”

  Another knock on the door. Aunt Sylvie poked her head inside the room. “They’re starting the music for you.”

  Andie held out her arm. “Let’s get you married.”

  “Finally.”

  When the wedding march began, Andie and her mother flanked Cassie at the back of the church. They were about to walk down the aisle, but Cassie put out her hand to stop Andie. “Wait for it.”

  At the front of the church, John turned and gaped at them. He shook his head and wiped at his eyes. Cassie smiled brighter, then nodded. “Okay. Now.”

  The service passed in a blur for Andie. It seemed as if they’d just reached the front of the church before the priest announced the couple as husband and wife. Then the recessional rang out, and they were walking back down the aisle and forming a reception line at the doors to the church. Guests streamed past Andie, complimenting her, but eager to get to the happy couple with their congratulations.

  She had endured a bone-crushing hug from one of John’s uncles when she heard her name spoken by the voice that had been haunting her dreams. She found Beckett’s piercing blue eyes on her. Her breath caught in her throat. While he was handsome already, he became stunning in a gray suit with an ice-blue tie that matched the color of his eyes. “I didn’t think you were coming,” she told him.

  “I wasn’t sure if I could.” He didn’t move, staring at her, then he took a step toward her. “You’re dazzling in that dress.”

  He hadn’t fainted, but she felt as if she’d won something from his admission. She reached out her left hand toward him. “Thank you for coming to the wedding. I know Cassie will be pleased.”

  He put his warm hand in hers, and Andie jerked at the sparks that his touch sent along her body. Yes, more of this please, her heart seemed to whisper. She kept her hand in his, staring into those eyes. If only she could keep him here.

  “What about you? Are you happy that I came?”

  She blinked several times. Should she tell him that she had ached at his absence? That she longed to be in the same room with him if only for just a moment. “Very.”

  A smile formed on his face. “Maybe you can save a dance for me later.”

  “I’d like that.”

  He removed his hand from hers, and she felt the warmth go with him. She kept her gaze on him as he approached Cassie and John. “Who was that handsome young man?”

  Andie turned to Aunt Sylvie. “A friend.”

  “If a friend of mine looked at me like he looks at you, I wouldn’t be single anymore.” Aunt Sylvie smirked at her. “Does your mother know?”

  Andie shook her head. “There’s nothing to know. We’re just friends.” And sometimes, she wondered if they were even that.

  * * *

  BECKETT SEARCHED THE banquet hall to find the table where he had been assigned to sit for the wedding reception. Coming to the wedding without Phoebe had been a risk, but he wasn’t sure that bringing a dog would have been appropriate despite the fact that she was meant for his well-being.

  His assigned table was on the periphery of the ballroom, so he sighed in relief and took a seat next to the wall so that he could visually scan the room. He also had a good view of the head table where Andie would be seated, and he liked the idea of being able to watch her from afar. Getting too close to her tended to make things messy in his mind. For the last week, he had struggled with the decision to come to the wedding. In the end, he had wanted to see her more than he wanted to stay away.

  Several people approached the table, spotted the number displayed on the silver holder, then walked on. If he sat alone, he wouldn’t have minded at all. But that thought was squashed by the arrival of a couple who gave him smiles before taking seats across the table from him.

  The DJ played soft music as more people gathered in the hall. He figured there had to be about a hundred or so guests. Hopefully, they’d serve dinner soon, then start the dancing so he could make his excuses and leave. He’d made his appearance, placed his wedding gift envelope in the box with the others, and would dance with Andie one time. Then he could check off his duty as being done to Cassie and John as their guest.

  The music became louder as the DJ announced the arrival of the new Mr. and Mrs. Robison. The newly married couple entered to applause with a few whistles. Beckett watched as Andie walked to the head table, turning and laughing at something the best man said. She looked amazing in that blue dress that clung in all the right places. And the way she had one long curl fall from the high bun to accentuate the curve of her neck. She sparkled. Why would she waste her time on a damaged guy like him when she could be happy with a guy like that?

  The wedding party soon made their way through the buffet line, and tables were sent one at a time after that. Good. This wedding was moving right along. He could eat. Congratulate the couple. And make it home by nine to see the end of the basketball game.

  Beckett’s table was invited to come up to the buffet, and he had to pass by the wedding party on his way there. He found his mouth watering at the sight of Andie instead of the food, however. How could one woman look so appetizing? He shook his head. He had to get that idea out of his mind. Despite Russ’s belief that Beckett deserved a good life, Beckett doubted that Andie was a part of it. She needed someone else, like the best man who flirted with her so easily. She laughed at something else the man said, and Beckett wondered if he had ever made her laugh like that. Dark fingers of jea
lousy twisted around his heart.

  He took a plate and started to fill it with food, keeping his focus there rather than on the sight of Andie. Someone bumped into him and the plate crashed to the floor. He winced and bent to clean the mess.

  A waiter approached him. “Here. Let me get that, sir.”

  Beckett glanced up at the man and nodded. “Sorry.”

  “Happens every night. Don’t worry about it.”

  Beckett straightened and found that Andie was looking in his direction. He couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her, couldn’t move until the waiter handed him a clean plate.

  He got back into the buffet line and had almost made it to the end when Andie walked up to him, her perfect brow marred with a frown. “Are you all right?”

  He said nothing, but nodded. She put a hand on his arm before he could return to his seat. “I hope you’ll save a dance for me later.”

  He wanted nothing more than to have her in his arms one last time. “I’m looking forward to it.”

  Someone called her name, but she gave him a dazzling smile before moving in the direction of the person who had called to her. He hated that she had to leave him so quickly. Hated that he hadn’t thought of a reason to keep her by his side for just a minute more. Hated even more that he knew that nothing could happen between them. Not when she deserved so much more than he could give her.

  * * *

  ANDIE STOOD AS she tapped a knife on her champagne flute. The DJ brought over a microphone, and she smiled at him before taking it. She scanned the crowd first as she had learned in high school speech class, then picked up her note cards. “Thank you all for coming tonight to celebrate Cassie and John’s marriage. Because even though the evening is well under way, they are at the beginning of a lifetime journey together. And that’s definitely worth celebrating.”

  She scanned the crowd again and spotted Beckett sitting at a table near the back. The words she’d prepared to say slipped from her mind, and she fumbled with the cards to find where she’d left off. Looked up again and found Beckett. “The kind of love that Cassie and John share is special. There’s so much that can come between two people, and choosing to love, despite the obstacles, despite the issues they might have is an admirable feat.

  “That’s why we’re here tonight. Two people were lucky to have found in each other the one who makes their life better. Who brings joy and happiness, safety and completion every day for the rest of their lives.” She paused and picked up her glass of champagne. “Let’s raise our glasses and toast Cassie and John. May their marriage be full of love, laughter and everything good that life can offer.”

  She faced Cassie and raised her glass a little higher before taking a sip of the fizzy champagne. When she sat back down, her sister reached over and hugged her. “Thank you,” Cassie whispered in Andie’s ear.

  “Just be happy.”

  “I already am. Now it’s your turn.”

  Andie handed the microphone to the best man who stood and started toasting the couple, as well. His words barely registered. She’d noticed that Beckett was still looking at her. Did he understand that she could choose him despite the issues they had? That she would like to find love with him that made her life more complete?

  With the speeches done, Cassie and John cut the cake amid a group of guests taking pictures of them with their phones. And then the first dance was announced. John held out his hand to Cassie who rushed into his arms, smiling widely. Then Andie’s name was announced with the best man’s. He took her into his arms, but kept plenty of space between them. She didn’t mind that since she only wanted to be in Beckett’s arms.

  When the DJ announced the next dance with Cassie and the Buttuccis, Andie stood on the edge of the crowd and watched as first Tiny, then Biggie led her sister around the room. It was the first moment she’d thought of her father all day. Even when she had been escorting her sister down the aisle, he hadn’t come to mind. Her father had missed out on it all. And there was nothing he could do to make up for it. But Cassie didn’t seem to mind as she rested her head against Biggie’s chest as the big man let tears slip down his face.

  After the mother-and-groom dance, the DJ turned up the volume and sped up the tempo of the next few songs. Guests gathered on the dance floor. Andie walked back to the head table and took a sip from her water glass.

  “Andie.”

  She turned. Beckett was standing next to her. She reached out her left hand and straightened his tie, which had become askew, then patted it against his chest. “Did you come to ask me to dance?”

  “I really can’t dance, but yes I did.”

  She gave a shrug. “You seemed to do okay in the Thorpes’ basement.”

  “There weren’t a bunch of people watching us then.” He gestured toward the busy dance floor. “I don’t do well with crowds.”

  “So ignore them and keep your eyes on me.”

  He let out a sigh, as if her request was taxing on him, but grinned a little and took her hand. The fast music switched to a soft ballad, perfect for couples. She led him to the dance floor where she spotted Aunt Sylvie dancing with one of John’s uncles, her head resting on the man’s shoulder. Good for her aunt.

  She turned to face Beckett as the music played. Finally, Beckett’s hands gripped her hips and pulled her closer to his body. She put her arms on his shoulders and looked into his eyes while they swayed to the song. “You’re doing fine.”

  His grin grew. “I liked your speech.”

  “I meant every word. Nothing should keep you from finding love.”

  He faltered in his steps and ended up on her toes. “Sorry.” He hung his head to look at his feet.

  She reached out and lifted his head to look at her. “It’s okay. I like dancing with you. Just keep your focus on my eyes. Don’t think about your feet.”

  His grip on her hips brought her a little closer, sending frissons of pleasure through her nerve endings. She wanted the song to go on and on. For this moment to stretch out forever if it meant she could be in Beckett’s embrace just a little bit longer.

  A loud thump, and the DJ’s microphone sent out a jarring squeal interrupting the music. Suddenly Beckett had pulled Andie into a tight embrace, shielding her with his body against a presumed threat. His eyes darted around the room, and he breathed heavily. She put her hands on his cheeks. “Beckett, it’s only the microphone. Look at me. Just breathe.”

  He looked back at her, and she nodded. “Breathe in.” He obeyed. “Now let it out slow.” Again, he complied. “One more time,” she said.

  She saw the panic starting to leave his eyes, but she kept her hands on his face. “You’re okay.”

  He seemed to come back to himself then. “Sorry, Andie. I can’t do this.” He strode away from her.

  She watched Beckett go, longing to run after him, but knowing that nothing she could say would change anything in that moment. Why couldn’t he see that he was more than he thought? That he could be the hero of her dreams?

  She felt her bottom lip tremble and reached up to still it. She wouldn’t cry over Beckett. Not here at the wedding. She would wait until later once she was alone.

  Alone. The word made her heart ache. Still, there was a difference between alone and lonely. She might go home alone every night, but she was far from lonely.

  “Cassandra’s looking for you.”

  Andie turned and met her mother’s gaze. “Thanks. I’ll be there in a sec.”

  “Is there something going on between you and the young man that just left?” her mother asked, one silver eyebrow arched.

  “No, Mother. He’s just a friend.”

  Her mother sniffed, indicating what she thought of Andie’s labeling Beckett as a friend. “Good. You don’t need to be mixed up with him.”

  “What do you know about Beckett?”

  “I’ve heard about him f
rom your sister.” She leaned closer to Andie. “You don’t need another broken man in your life.”

  “He’s not broken. Not like he thinks he is.”

  “Andromeda, when you were little you used to bring home birds with broken wings. Dogs and cats that had been abandoned or been hit by cars.” Her mother gave her a smirk. “For a while, I figured you would become a veterinarian because you had such a heart for these hurt animals. But then, as you got older you started bringing home broken people. Friends who had been dumped, or whose parents had split up. Remember how you invited your teacher over to dinner, the one whose sister had passed? You have a huge heart for love, dear. But you can’t save the world.”

  Andie bit her lip. Did she try to save everyone? Maybe she did, but why shouldn’t she? She had a strong streak of compassion in her. Why should she apologize for that? Wasn’t it worse to be otherwise? “Cassie says I pursue the unavailable guy.”

  “And I’d say this Beckett is the epitome of unavailability, don’t you?”

  “You don’t even know him, Mother. Truth is, I only know a little about him, but what I do know makes me love him all the more.”

  Andie brought her hand to her mouth. Did she love him? Oh yes, she did. And the thought that he had walked out on her again made her sad. Maybe it was time for her to start saving herself, along with Beckett. “I have to go find Beckett before he leaves. Tell Cassie I’ll be right there.”

  She picked up the hem of her dress and ran past her mother, determined to find Beckett because she was sure he’d found his excuse now to leave early.

  She sidestepped a couple who were leaving the dance floor and scanned the exit doors. Choosing one, she ran out to the parking lot. Beckett was striding toward his truck parked at the end of an outer aisle. She called his name, but he didn’t turn to look at her.