The Blond Devil of the Sea: The Highland Ladies Book Three

by Barclay, Celeste

  “She’s a pretty piece, for sure,” he responded. The tiny whimper almost broke his resolve. He poured mugs of whisky for each of the men and waved for them to be seated. He took a seat in the only chair that had arm rests. He gripped one every time one of the men cast a glance at Caragh. He could see her from the corner of his eye. Her hands were folded in her lap, and while she’d squared her shoulders, she’d lowered her head. His cock tried to stir to life as he watched her in his favorite submissive position for her, but he reprimanded himself.

  When the trays arrived, Rowan snapped his fingers at Caragh, “Serve.”

  She didn’t look up, she didn’t look over at him, she only followed the command. She moved about the cabin, placing a plate before each of his guests as they ran their hands over her backside and tweaked her nipples through the sheer gown. When she finally brought Rowan’s plate, she refused to look at him. He tried to see if there were any tears in the eyes that she kept downturned, but all he could see was the hard set of her jaw. He waved her away and snapped before pointing to the spot where she kneeled earlier.

  Rowan kept an eye on Caragh throughout the meal but engaged in the conversation that flowed around him. He was happy to see his cousin, the only person other than Caragh who knew his past. He tamped down any feelings other than anger when he remembered what he had confided in her. He ordered Caragh to rise again when the meal ended, and she had to clear the table.

  “Rowan, while your company is delightful as always and your food better than most, let us get on with things.”

  “I’ve decided you can have her,” Rowan announced.

  “That easily? Why would you cast her off when you came to her defense? What’s wrong with her?”

  “Nothing really, but you’ll quickly realize she’s more trouble than she’s worth. Though she’ll warm your bed nicely.”

  The second sound of the night to come from Caragh was another soft whimper. Rowan steeled himself against it. “Stand.”

  Caragh rose to her feet with grace, and she looked up for the first time. Rowan watched her survey Ruairí before she looked at the other two men. She never looked at him.

  “I should like to find out if she really is something I want to claim after all.”

  “Not possible. Once she’s aboard your ship, she’s your problem.”

  “Perhaps, I could sample her now. My men deserve a chance to know whether they’ll enjoy her once I’m through.”

  Rowan shrugged. It wouldn’t be the first time he and Ruairí shared a woman, but he wasn’t sure he would survive watching the other men touch her more than they already had.

  “Come here, lass. I don’t bite. At least not yet,” Ruairí chuckled, but it held no warmth.

  She looked into the deep blue eyes so like Rowan’s, but there was nothing there. It was as though he was soulless. Caragh swallowed as she looked from Ruairí to the two other men who rubbed their cocks. For the first time since the men arrived, she looked at Rowan. The same look of hatred shone as it had when he found her at the cave. Gone was the man she fell in love with, the man she thought loved her. Betrayal squeezed her heart until she struggled to breathe. Her hand clutched her throat, and Rowan jerked forward ever so slightly before he caught himself.

  “I wouldn’t keep me waiting, lass. I’m not as patient as my cousin.”

  Caragh turned back to Ruairí and once again was struck by how similar they were. They were the same height, the same build, the same everything…except Ruari’s eyes lacked the stardust in Rowan’s, and his hair wasn’t quite as light. It was also longer.

  Caragh felt the same emotions as she did the first night she stood before Rowan. She had another decision to make. Rowan cast her off, so she had little choice in where she would end up next. She doubted either would put her ashore if she asked, but it was worth a try before she made up her mind.

  “If neither of you want me or could be bothered, then let me go ashore. Let me go home.”

  “It’s not so simple, mo chridhe.” Caragh felt sick at the sound of the affectionate term Rowan used when it came from Ruairí’s mouth. “There’s a code among pirates. If a man is slain, then the dead man’s captain has the right to claim justice by taking a man from the murderer’s crew. I chose to take you.”

  Caragh sucked in a breath. She wouldn’t go easily into this arrangement. Not after all.

  “That’s a pretty little agreement you have amongst yourselves, but that code doesn’t apply to me. I’m not a pirate, and that slain man--the one you conveniently forget--was my little brother.” She inched closer to Ruairí and glared at him before swinging her gaze back to Rowan. She curled her lip in disgust at him. “In fact, by your reasoning, since you killed my brother first, I have a right to claim justice. Perhaps, I shall claim you.” Caragh swung her gaze to Ruairí and smirked at his surprise.

  “She’s certainly a bright one to reason that out.” Ruairí leaned to look around her. His grin didn’t transform his face into the work of art that it did Rowan’s. “By all means, claim away. I have something right here that’s eager for you to take.”

  Ruairí placed his hand on his thigh next to his groin, drawing Caragh attention to his arousal.

  Caragh had made her decision. Once more in a position where control was stripped from her, the one thing she could decide for herself was how she turned herself over. She could kick and scream, or she could make the most of it. She walked to Ruairí and sat on his lap, her legs between his. She turned to look once more at Rowan before she leaned forward and kissed Ruairí. She tried not to gag. It was nothing like kissing Rowan. It wasn’t unpleasant in of itself; it just wasn’t Rowan. She felt his warm hand on her thigh, and it was far gentler than she anticipated. Cool air kissed the back of her thighs as she felt his other hand bunch the fabric until it slipped below. His hand rested on her backside, but it didn’t travel anywhere. Caragh wondered if he was extending her a kindness or waiting to pounce.

  Chapter Eleven

  Rowan was in an agony worse than any sword wound. It was even worse than the accusations thrown at him by his clan. It was a pain of his own creation. He watched Caragh’s face transform into the same expression of acceptance she’d shown the night she arrived in his cabin and declared she would make the most of the situation. He knew that was exactly what she now intended. He had cast her off to a fate she didn’t know. She was accepting it and making the most of it, not only to make it bearable, but to keep herself alive. Rowan knew Ruairí wouldn’t mistreat her even if he was cold and detached, but she had no way to know that.

  When he found her on the beach squaring off against his cousin, he panicked. He could only think of getting to her before Ruairí ran her through, just as she’d done the man at her feet. Once he was sure she would live, fury and hurt consumed him. She’d escaped at her first chance, risking her life once again by plunging into the icy waters. She was willing to risk her life to get away from him, and his heart broke. He couldn’t look at her, not after she rejected him and abandoned him. He decided in that moment that he would give her to Ruairí. He remembered what she said when they met. The villagers might welcome her back, but she would never live down the stigma of sailing with pirates. He knew he couldn’t countenance looking at her anymore, so Ruairí was the only option. Now he sat gripping the arm rests of his chair as he heard the wood creak. He watched as the collar of the negligee slipped off the shoulder Caragh dipped. The gown was so loose around the neck that her breast practically tumbled out. Ruairí played with her nipple through the gauzy material, and Caragh’s moan reached his ears. He watched as the man he considered more his brother than his cousin took his woman’s breast into his mouth to suckle. Caragh’s head fell back as her hand pressed Ruairí’s head to her. She moaned again, and even though the bunched material around her backside kept him from seeing Ruairí’s fingers, he saw the movement as they slid between her legs. Before his eyes, Caragh twisted to straddle Ruairí. She leaned in to kiss him as she reached between the
m. Rowan saw her arms move, and he knew she was pulling the laces to his leggings. Ruairí’s groan signaled she was touching him in a way Rowan always thought would be for him alone. He chided himself since this was exactly what he intended when he decided to give her over to Ruairí. He created this torrid scene, and it was killing him. When Caragh rose up to slide onto Ruairí’s cock, Rowan was out of his chair. He plucked her from his cousin before he entered her, but he could see Ruairí’s cock glistened from brushing against her entrance. Rowan roared as he pulled back his arm to swing. Two small but strong hands dragged his arm back.

  “He’s your cousin, Rowan.”

  Rowan shook his head. His vision still tunneled on his cousin, everything else was black as dots danced before his eyes. He tried to pull his arm free to swing at the man who smirked before him.

  “You gave up on me. You gave me to him.”

  Caragh’s words permeated his fog. He spun around and backed her against the wall, using his arms to bracket her in. “I’m not the one who gave up. I’m not the one who ran, or rather swam, away at the first chance for escape. You left me.”

  “I did no such thing. I left your ship, but I never intended to leave you.”

  “What?”

  “You wouldn’t let me go, but that’s my home. My family. I knew you would follow me. I trusted you would support me, help me fight whoever attacked my people.” Caragh looked around Rowan to Ruairí who had put his clothes back in place and smirked at his cousin’s back. “You’re the one who betrayed me, Rowan. Your sin is far greater than the one you think I committed.”

  Rowan couldn’t breathe; he couldn’t swallow. He could barely see straight as everything he convinced himself of that night crumbled around him.

  “Out,” he muttered. “All of you out.”

  Caragh dipped below his arm and darted toward Ruairí, who wrapped his arm around her.

  “Not you,” Rowan pleaded.

  “What’s done is done, Rowan. You gave me to Ruairí, and I made my decision. I know you recognized it as the same one I made with you.”

  “You don’t know what you’re doing. You would go with him willingly? You have no idea how he might treat you.”

  “If I should fear him, then that speaks all too loudly of how little you care about me, if you would send me with a man who might mistreat me.”

  “Lass, you need to decide now. I need to return to my ship. Come with me or not, but for what it’s worth, my cousin came through in the end. I knew he would.” Ruairí smirked at Rowan. “Even if it did take him longer than I imagined. Such a pity you didn’t wait a bit longer after all.”

  Ruairí backed away when Rowan lunged at him. Ruairí allowed Rowan to grab him by the collar, but Ruairí leaned in to whisper in Rowan’s ear. “You love her. I wouldn’t have gone through with it, even if it was tempting. Why did you wait so long? It almost went farther than I was prepared for. She’s quite the seductress.”

  Rowan reared back as he looked at his cousin. They’d been best friends their entire life. Ruairí was the one person who might know him better than Caragh. “Go to her and fix this, or I will take her with me,” Ruairí finished. “You’ve hurt her more deeply than you believe she hurt you.”

  Rowan nodded, and Ruairí ushered his companions through the door and shut it behind him. Rowan looked around and found Caragh once again in front of the porthole. He was at a loss for what to do.

  “Caragh.”

  She didn’t move, not even a flinch. Rowan sank onto the bed and rested his elbows on his knees, cradling his head. “What have I done?”

  “Destroyed my trust in you.”

  Caragh moved to his side and looked down at a man she didn’t recognize. The anger and bitterness were now sorrow and regret. She found it unnerving to see Rowan, who she considered to be the bravest and strongest of men, looking broken. She reached out her hand and rested it on his shoulder. He looked up unsure of what to do.

  “I just don’t understand how you could imagine I was leaving you. What led you to assume that?”

  “You going over the side and into the water just as fast as the night I met you when you did try to escape.”

  “Rowan, a lot has transpired and changed since then. Do you have any idea how deeply your lack of faith in me hurts? And this,” she gestured around the cabin. “I don’t know how I can ever get past this. I know you were angry and hurt too, but to trade me to another man, even if he was your cousin? I can only think of one other betrayal to rival this. All the more reason for me not to understand how you could do something like this.”

  “I couldn’t bring myself to look at you when I thought you wanted to leave me. I remembered what you said about having little to come home to after being with pirates, so passing you into Ruairí’s care seemed the most logical option.”

  “But the things you said!”

  “I know. Part of it was anger, but I was trying to convince myself that you didn’t matter as much as you do. Then I would be able to let you go.”

  “But it’s much more than that. You humiliated me. You picked the most degrading way to punish me for what you believed were my transgressions. You wanted to hurt me just as much as you believed I hurt you. You wanted revenge, Rowan.”

  “I did. I admit it.”

  “How do you not know how much I love you?”

  Rowan shot to his feet.

  “What did you say?”

  “Oh, Rowan. I love you. I have since nearly the beginning. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know if it was something you would want to hear, but it didn’t make it any less true.”

  “Your love is something precious that I should have cared for and protected, just as I promised to protect you. I broke that pledge to you tonight. How could I have done that to you?”

  “Because you love me, too. If you didn’t, you couldn’t have been hurt enough to react as you did. If you didn’t care about me, if you weren’t hurting so deeply, then you wouldn’t have struck out as you did.”

  “How can you be so understanding?”

  Caragh tilted her head back and tried to find patience. She stepped away from him.

  “Why do you think I was able to give myself over to Ruairí? I wanted to hurt you as badly as you hurt me. I wanted my pound of flesh for the pain you were causing me.”

  Rowan nodded his head and waited for Caragh to go on, but she only stood there staring at him.

  “So, what now,” he murmured.

  Caragh shrugged. “I don’t know. A spanking and a good night’s sleep?”

  “How can you make light of this?”

  “What else is there to be done? I deserve the spanking for diving into the sea and trying to take on a band of pirates without you. You sent me here to keep me safe, and I flagrantly disobeyed you.”

  Rowan slowly pulled her into his embrace, expecting her to push him away at any moment, but she came willingly.

  “I don’t think I can ever punish you again after tonight. You’ve been through more than I could endure.”

  “Rowan, we’ll work through this. I haven’t stopped loving you because of this, but it’ll take a good long while before I trust you completely. But I need those spankings as much as you need to dole them out. They grounded me. They made me feel loved, and I don’t want to give that up.”

  “I should have told you how I felt if you thought gaining a spanking was the only way to feel cared about.”

  “Did you really understand that until tonight?”

  “No, but I suspected I loved you. I didn’t realize the depth of it until I feared you were gone.”

  “Then perhaps not a spanking, but a good night’s sleep. Rowan, I’m so tired. All I want is to get out of this gown, burn it preferably, and climb into bed with you. I want you to hold me until I fall asleep, and I expect you to still be holding me when I wake up.”

  “You want to share a bed with me? Let me touch you?”

  Caragh huffed out a breath. She was discovering the ma
n she loved was not only deeply flawed in how he dealt with his emotions but was insecure. She should have realized it after he told her the story of his past. She remembered how adamant he’d been that he would never abandon a child when he came inside her the first night. Now all the pieces fit together. She lifted onto her toes and kissed each side of his jaw. “Just hold me tonight, and we’ll figure out the rest in the morning.”

  For the first time since they met, they crawled into bed and only slept. Rowan turned and rolled to follow her throughout the night, never letting her go.

  Chapter Twelve

  As sunlight flooded through the window, Caragh opened her eyes and stretched. She looked to the porthole and found a pair of haggard blue eyes watching her.

  “Did you not sleep?” she asked, her voice raspy.

  “Some,” he shrugged one shoulder.

  “Not enough. Why not stay abed and try to catch a little more rest?”

  “You know I have duties above deck, and I promised to take you ashore this morning.”

  Trepidation replaced the eagerness of the night. She watched her brother die the night before, and that conjured emotions she hadn’t had the energy to acknowledge until now. She wanted to see her family but feared how she would be treated by the villagers.

  “I’m not in such a rush as I thought I’d be.” She pulled the covers over her head and snuggled closer to him. Rowan pulled the coverlet down to her shoulder and brushed the hair from her shoulder. He leaned forward and kissed the satiny skin. “We’ll go when you’re ready. We’ll do what you want, mo ghaol.”

  My love. They grinned at one another. Despite the horrid experiences of the night before, they both reveled in the sound of those two words. None of the night before was forgotten, but some time in their sleep, both of them decided to forgive.

  “I know what I want, and it’s certainly not something we can do in front of my family. Not if you don’t want my mother to cut off your cods.”