He came to a halt, but his blood continued to throb in his veins. “You don’t expect anything from me? What do you think, I’m a monster? I’m just going to go about my day and ignore the fact there’ll be a child in nine months?”
She crossed and uncrossed her legs, visibly nervous. “I don’t know what to say. This is news for me. I thought about it the whole day, but can’t seem to—”
Don’t upset her. He inhaled, then exhaled slowly, trying to digest the news and think about the best outcome. His father would laugh at him right now. Look at you. Got the woman pregnant and now you’re acting like a savage. You just can’t get it together, can you? “Violet, you have two children, a new job and you’re still recovering from a major event last year. It’s a lot for you,” he said, hoping his voice would outdo the one in his head.
She looked up to him, tilting her head. “What are you suggesting, exactly?”
“Let’s get married.”
11
Get married? He spoke with the enthusiasm of a man who just heard his death sentence.
Disappointment swirled like a ghost around her body. She stood up. Her whole life she had done what was expected of her, what society in her parents’ eyes deemed right. Not anymore—and not from a man who acted like he was doing her a favor. “No, thanks.”
“No?” He leaned closer.
She stepped back, unwilling to let his scent or soulful eyes reel her in. Time to be tough. “Times have changed, Theo. If you want to be involved in this baby’s life, great. But I won’t marry you just because you have a savior complex.” Did he want to marry her because he hadn’t saved his late wife? She swallowed the throbbing lump in her throat. She knew he felt guilty for Celine’s death, but it had nothing to do with her pregnancy.
He rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s okay if the one I’m saving is my baby.”
Heat filled her cheeks and anger stabbed at her. How dare he, after she’d trusted him? To use her past against her? “Saving him from me?”
He held up his hand in denial. “No. That didn’t come out right. Listen, we have a mad attraction to each other. We get along. I think we’d make a really good team raising a child together.”
She sighed. A wave of sadness washed through her. The most romantic proposal she could ever get. “I appreciate your faith in us as a team. I share it too, which is why I’m not rushing into getting married.” And you don’t have to try and do the right thing, she added inwardly.
He took her hand in his and kissed her wrist. “Just consider it.”
Little ripples of awareness shot up her arm. Seemed her body hadn’t gotten the memo about Theo yet. She jerked her hand away. “You’re reacting out of shock.”
“I’m reacting out of rationality. We could work well together, Violet. Marcelle likes you a lot, and she could use a female role model in her life. And I’ll give you financial stability, so you don’t have to worry about anything at all. I’ll pay your medical bills. And I’ll be a good stepfather to your kids.”
“Enough. I’m sorry.” She shook her head violently. “I know you mean well, but I needed the whole day to process this news and it isn’t enough. I’m overwhelmed. I can’t possibly imagine a scenario involving marriage when that would change so many people’s lives.”
“This baby will change their lives no matter what, whether we’re married or not.”
He had a point there. How would Amanda react? A shiver of apprehension ran through her. She couldn’t expose her kids to even more novelty—they really liked Theo, but having him as a permanent fixture in their daily life was a different story.
Besides, he doesn’t love me. Despite how well they got along, he hadn’t once mentioned any deep feelings—because he probably still loved his late wife. His wife who had been perfect at everything. I never thought I’d be jealous of someone who’s not even breathing anymore.
“There are other problems at hand, Theo. I need to schedule a procedure to remove my IUD as soon as I come back to Tulip. There’s a chance of miscarriage when that happens.” She had researched it online and called her doctor’s office, which had been closed, but she left a message to make an appointment for Monday.
“I’ll go with you.”
“That I’ll allow. But for the rest of the night, let’s not talk about this anymore. I can’t make any plans until I know the baby is safe,” she said, to at least buy some time and strategize how to convince him they didn’t need to get married to have a solid co-parenting relationship.
He erased the gap between them and picked her hand and lifted it to his mouth. “We’ll figure it out, ma chère.”
“We will. Because everything is so crazy, let’s cool it for a little bit. Tonight, I’ll be sleeping with my kids as planned anyway.”
He nodded. “Sure. I understand.”
She bit her lower lip. Last night had been wonderful, but from now on, sleeping together would not be in the cards. She needed to regain control, and that wouldn’t happened if she let her hormones reign. Pregnancy hormones at that. Get ready for a lot of cold showers, Violet. You’ll need them.
“Wow. Pregnant?” Lara repeated, in the lobby of the hotel.
Violet glanced around them to make sure no one heard them. Brit and Damian had asked to take some pictures with Amanda and Trevor. They mentioned something about the professional photographer still taking some shots of the family in the hotel area.
While that happened, Violet had confided in Lara.
Theo’s flight had left two hours earlier, and they didn’t talk much during breakfast.
“Quiet. I don’t want Brit to know yet, or anyone for that matter. I’ll tell Nikki when I’m back in Tulip.”
Lara nodded. “What are you going to do?”
“I want to see a doctor when I’m back to remove my IUD and see what happens from there. There’s a chance the baby won’t make it,” she said, chastising herself for internet searches.
Lara hugged her. “I can go with you.”
Violet soaked in her friend’s embrace for a moment. Then, she withdrew. “I know. You’re wonderful. But I promised Theo he could go with me—he wants to be involved.”
“What are you going to do about him?”
Violet shuffled her weight from one foot to the other. She skimmed the lobby again, to make sure her kids didn’t sneak in and eavesdrop on her conversation. But all she saw was a good number of tourists checking in or talking to the concierge in the lavish reception. “I don’t know. He’s now a permanent fixture in my life.”
“Was he an ass when you told him the news?”
“No, he was surprised, of course. That’s natural. But once he got over that, he wanted to help. He even proposed marriage.”
Lara’s eyes widened. “He asked you to marry him?”
Violet waved her off. “He meant it as a practicality.”
“Oh.”
Violet shrugged. Her female ego had gotten a hit, and it still ached when she remembered how he’d listed the reasons why they should tie the knot. “He doesn’t love me. I can’t marry someone because it’s logistically easier.”
Lara stroked her arm, soothing her. “I totally understand, honey. Count on me for whatever you need, okay?”
“Thanks. I will.”
“How is she?” Theo asked to the nurse who had checked in Violet.
“She’s fine. She said you can come in with her if you’d like.”
“Yes.” He stood, and quickly followed the nurse with strides so long he almost walked in front of her. He’d given Violet the chance to put on a gown and greet the doctor by herself—he wanted to be there for the procedure, but from their talk two days ago in Vegas, he’d learned he couldn’t pressure her. So patience was a virtue he’d have to master after all.
Or maybe just pretending to be patient. Inside, his gut clenched and nerve endings burned in affliction. What if something happened to the baby or to her?
He found her laying on the bed, with a gown cover he
r.
The doctor, a brunette woman in her forties, shook his hand. “Nice to meet you, I’m Dr. Gilbert.”
“Nice to meet you,” he said, then took a seat next to Violet.
“We’ll do an ultrasound first and then determine our plan of action,” Dr. Gilbert said. “All good?” She flashed him an encouraging smile.
Maybe because his color had drained from his face. He nodded, and lifted his hand to hold Violet’s. She stared at him, and he’d have given money to read the emotion in her blue eyes. Fear? Anticipation? Whatever it was, it matched the concern washing over her expression.
The doctor grabbed the device and it disappeared between her legs. A second later, she pointed at the back and white screen. “Good news. The IUD hasn’t interfered with the pregnancy, so we can remove it and since you’re in the very early stage, you should be fine.”
“Really?” Violet asked the doctor, but squeezed his hand.
“Yes. It shouldn’t hurt. Are you ready?”
“Yes.”
The doctor grabbed a couple of materials he didn’t recognize and once again her hands disappeared between her legs. Violet clasped his hand again, creasing her eyes and contracting in pain.
“Almost done,” said Dr. Gilbert.
“You’re doing great, mon amour,” he whispered. “I’m here with you, Violet.” He kissed her cheek, the contact a little bit more than a brush on her skin. “I’m here,” he repeated in a low voice.
She glanced at him, and specks of silver twinkled in the depths of her irises. He kissed the back of her hand, feeling the tension when the doctor did her job under the sheet. Thankfully, it didn’t last long, and Dr. Gilbert sat upright with a smile.
“We’re done here. You did great, Violet.”
Violet’s hand softened in his. Relief loosened his stomach. “Really?”
“Yes. You may feel cramps, which is normal. But I was able to remove it, and you should be able to carry this baby without any problems related to the IUD.”
“Thank you,” Violet whispered.
“I’ll give you two a moment,” Dr. Gilbert said, before she left the office and closed the door behind her.
“You’re great, baby. Everything is good,” he said.
She moved on the bed, then came to a sitting position, letting go of his hand. “Thanks, Theo.”
“See how good we are together?” he said, even if he bit his tongue a second later. Yes, patience certainly wasn’t his forte. But exhilaration surged through him. Their baby would be fine. Why not celebrate it? And why not make another attempt for her to see they were meant to be together?
“Yes.” She straightened her shoulders and stood, reaching for her clothes hanging on the hook. “You’re a great father and I wouldn’t expect any less,” she said, her tone cold. Almost detached, like she was looking at the situation from the outside.
“Have I said anything wrong? You changed in the last minute.” He toyed with mentioning pregnancy hormones, but he didn’t want her to reach for a heavy object and throw it at him. Besides, one look at her and it dawned on him.
Fear.
Fear darkened her eyes, usually clear and bright, and also thinned her lips. She broke the gaze and shove the gown in the appropriate bin, then slid on her clothes. Ice ran in his veins, soon fast tracking his whole body until he stood in front of her, stiff as a column.
“Violet. Talk to me.”
She rubbed her temple. “I want to co-parent with you, Theo. But I can’t give you anything else right now… not even what we were sharing before I got pregnant.”
“Why not? If there is a moment, it’s right now.”
“Because I have to focus on this baby, on my children and keeping my life balanced. If I add you as the man who’s making me feel all these different emotions… I won’t be able to do it all.”
He stepped forward, eyes searching for hers. “Since when is feeling these emotions bad?” Hell, she made him fell all kinds of emotions too.
“Since you’re doing the right thing. You want to marry me to do the right thing. But see, I’ve done the right thing a lot in my life—even when it felt wrong— for the sake of doing what was expected of me. I can’t go back there.”
“I’m not your family, Violet. I’m not your ex. I’m a brand new person.”
She glanced at the floor.
“Damn it, Violet. I love you.”
She turned to him. Color drained from her face, and she slapped her hand on her chest. Surprise flickered in her gaze.
He grabbed her hands in his, feeling the coldness of her palms. Merde. Every part of him throbbed, every part of him had come alive like he hadn’t in years when those words impulsively fled from his mouth. He loved her… and that sentiment scared the shit out of him, too. But he could no longer hide it.
“And I’m supposed to believe you now?” she said. Tears formed in her eyes. She disengaged her hands from his, trembling. “You always said you wanted something temporary, that you weren’t ready. I’m pregnant, and all of a sudden you’re telling me you love me. That’s a very low blow, Theo. You’re trying to manipulate me to gain control of the situation.”
What? Her not believing him was bad enough, but to accuse him of manipulating her? Disappointment cooled his blood, and an ache tightened his heart. Perhaps he hadn’t been ready, but she made him want to be ready. For her.
“I’m not lying, Violet,” he said evenly. “I have no reason to.”
She folded her arms. “That’s where you’re wrong.”
“So you’re telling me we’re done, romantically? And your only interest is me is as a co-parent?”
“Yes.” She wiped a couple of tears falling down her cheeks.
“And what I feel has zero saying in this?”
“What I feel has zero saying in this. I’m sorry.”
12
“Wow,” Nikki said. “You’re pregnant too?”
“Haven’t you heard what she’s been saying for the past thirty minutes?” Lara nudged her friend’s arm.
“Sorry, I get distracted these days. Mommy brain,” Nikki said.
“Well, let me put you up to speed—she’s pregnant and broke up with the baby daddy,” Lara said.
Violet plopped on the couch between her two friends, the truth of those words weighing her down. For the past three days, she’d been alternating between feeling sorry for herself for letting Theo go and trying to build herself up. She could deal with a lot, but not manipulations.
He’d used the word love to manipulate her into marrying him. He couldn’t love her—he’d married the type of woman who was perfect for him—the one who made all the right choices. That wasn’t her anymore. From the moment she faced her past and confronted her mother, a lot had changed. Her mother had refused to support her claims and disowned her from her will when Violet hadn’t backed down. She’d decided to wrestle her demons, and she’d stopped being perfect. The perfect wife. The perfect daughter.
If he accepted her the way she was, he wouldn’t have pressured her so much early on. He’d give her time and space. But no, he’d been selfish. Selfish and only thinking about himself and doing the right thing which meant she couldn’t believe him when he said he loved her.
What if he could love me? Not now, but some day? And I threw it all away. Her stomach plummeted, and an icy sensation spread through her body.
“Violet,” Nikki called her. “Are you sure you don’t want him? I saw the way he looked at you in Vegas.”
“He wanted to have sex with me.”
“No, it was something more,” Nikki insisted. “Why is it so hard for you to believe it?”
“I don’t know… after so much work I’ve done, you’d think I’d know the answer.” Violet glanced at her tea. After that morning sickness, tea and crackers had all she’d managed to eat. “What’s wrong with me?” she asked more to herself than her friends.
“How do you feel about him?” Lara asked, shifting in the couch, staring at her wit
h those big brown eyes that made it impossible for anyone to lie.
“I fell for him,” Violet said. She reached for the tea, trying really hard to focus on something to keep her mind from wandering. “He’s wonderful. But I can’t compromise my needs for a relationship. I can’t be the only one bringing love.”
“Did he say how he felt about you?”
“Yes, but only when it was too late.” She rolled her eyes. She took the teacup to her lips and sipped the liquid. “He said he loved me after he’d tried everything else to convince me to marry him. Which makes it hard for me to trust him, you know what I mean? It wasn’t his first thing to say.”
“Maybe he was scared to say it,” Nikki said. “He has some baggage too, right? A late wife.”
“Yes.” And a bad relationship with his father, if what he’d let slipped was anything to go by. She ran her fingers through her hair.
“What if it took something big to happen to drive him out of his comfort zone and tell you how he feels?” Nikki asked.
Violet closed her eyes and rubbed them. The image of Theo appeared, and she opened her eyes in a start, clearing her throat. Jesus. Get a grip. “I need to think. Maybe I acted on impulse, but I can’t give up on one day finding someone who really loves me.” And if he really loved her, he wouldn’t have walked away so easily.
“Here. Please come in, Violet,” said Principal Clark, standing from his chair behind his desk.
She closed the door of his office behind her and walked in. Why did he call her? Had he found out about her pregnancy?
No, that was silly. She’d only found out herself less than a week ago.
She sat in front of him, and he plopped on his seat. Then, he stared at her and re-arranged the collection of small miniature Star Wars characters he kept on his desk—something he usually did when he was tense or nervous.
“Why did you want to see me?” she asked in a neutral tone.
“Well, I’ve heard some news and wanted to ask you about them.”
Bad Teacher (Bad Girls Club Book 3) Page 9