Love's Journey

by Carrie Carr

  Rawson saw Amanda at the kitchen table with Martha, and he walked over and squatted beside her wheelchair. "I don't know what you said to my girl, but I wanted to thank you."

  "I didn't say much, but you're more than welcome." She took his hand in hers and looked directly into Rawson's eyes. Her voice was low and steely. "Lex is a very sensitive woman, Mr. Walters. I will do anything it takes to protect her."

  He nodded. Nothing but respect shone in his eyes. "I think I've hurt her enough for several lifetimes, don't you?"

  "I think a lot of things have hurt her; but I'll do everything in my power to make sure nothing else ever does."

  Lex burst into the room, her face flushed and a heavy coat in one hand. "I think this is one of your old ones, Dad."

  "It just might be. Does look a bit familiar." He stood and placed a hand on Amanda's shoulder, squeezing it gently. "See you when we get back, young lady. You try to get some rest."

  "I will," Amanda squeezed his hand with hers. "You two have fun." She smiled as Lex pulled her black hat on her head before she left the room.

  Martha watched the pair leave, shaking her head. "I never would have believed it. Those two going out together, after all these years. Reminds me of when Lexie was about ten or so. She used to follow him around closer than a shadow, never missing a step. You've done a good job."

  "I didn't do much, Martha. I just asked Lex to give him a chance." Amanda lowered her voice. "Does he look all right to you? I know I don't know the man, but--" She remembered how the coat Lex had brought for Rawson hung on his lanky frame. There's definitely something wrong.

  "I believe he's tired of the rodeo life. He looks so worn out." Martha took a sip of her coffee while she gathered her thoughts. "I think he's come home to stay, if Lexie will allow it. The road's no place for a man his age, especially as hard a life as he's had."

  "I'm hoping she'll see it that way, Martha. I'd hate for Lex to lose out on knowing her father again. It's just she can be so darned bullheaded."

  "I know. Believe me, you've done more to temper her attitude than anything else ever has. I'll always be thankful to you."

  "It's a labor of love," Amanda admitted. "She's had quite an effect on me, too. I don't know where I'd be without her."

  ELIZABETH WALKED INTO the hardware store and grabbed the first clerk she could find. "Excuse me, I need some assistance."

  "Yes, ma'am. What can I do for you?"

  After being directed to the proper location in the store, Elizabeth looked at the items on the shelves. "How am I supposed to carry all of these?" She saw an older man pushing a shopping cart. "Ah, perfect." When he turned away, she quickly tossed his items from the cart and began to fill it with what she needed.

  The man turned around and saw his box of nails and heavy twine sitting on the floor, his cart nowhere in sight. Shaking his head, he picked up the items and continued on his way. "Crazy people these days. Stealing baskets right out from under a man's nose."

  "Are you sure you don't need anything else, ma'am? I could always help you carry that out to your car, if you'd like." The young man set the last item back into her shopping cart and smiled at the well-dressed woman. "That's quite a few cans."

  Elizabeth waved him off. "Well, I'm going off to my cabin for a few weeks, and I like to be prepared," she lied easily. "Why else would I want this much?" She pushed the cart out into the parking lot and opened the trunk of her rental car. It took her several minutes, but she was finally able to spread out all of the gasoline containers in the trunk for easy filling. "I'll take care of that woman, once and for all."

  She drove around the small town for almost half an hour, searching for a gasoline pump that wasn't full service. "Good God. Have these people lost their minds? Not one decent convenience store in sight." She finally came upon a dingy grocery that also served gasoline. As she got out of the rental car, a freckle-faced young man raced outside to greet her.

  "Good afternoon. Would you like some help?" He zipped a lightweight jacket as he stepped closer.

  "No! Don't you backwater bumpkins understand the concept of self-serve? Do I have to draw you idiots a goddamned picture?" she yelled, her eyes wide.

  The boy stopped several feet away, his face suddenly pale. "Umm, gosh. No, ma'am." He began to back away from her, fear surfacing in his brown eyes. "I'll, ahh--leave you to it." The young man spun around and ran back into the store.

  "I should say so," Elizabeth giggled. "Pathetic morons. Act as if they've never seen a lady who wanted to fill her own tanks," she laughed. "That reminds me, I need to buy myself a bottle of champagne to celebrate. It won't be long now until I get my daughter back."

  LEX STOLE A glance at the man seated next to her in the old truck she used to transport hay. He was quietly looking out his window at the passing scenery, a small smile on his face. She had offered to let him drive, but Rawson refused, saying he hadn't been behind the wheel of a vehicle for almost ten years. So Lex had stubbornly buried her recently acquired fear of driving and climbed behind the wheel. Now she was glad she had. "It hasn't changed much, has it?"

  He turned. "No. It's amazing how quickly I remember this old road." Rawson gasped as they hit a deep rut. "I think it has the same potholes."

  "Probably. We're going back to the back pasture that I added a couple of years ago. It's got the best grazing for the horses, and I switch it out with the east pasture every other year." She pulled up to a wide gate and stopped the truck. "Let me just--"

  Rawson opened his door. "Let me get that for you, Lexington. It's the least I can do." He jumped out of the truck before she could stop him.

  She watched as her father worked the clasp on the gate and swung it open, a triumphant smile on his face. Would it be so bad to have him at home? I know he never approved of my lifestyle, but he gets along with Amanda. Maybe he's mellowed.

  "Whew. That thing is heavier than it looks," he exclaimed as he climbed back into the truck.

  "Yeah, the horses kept pushing the last one down, so I had this one built out of steel."

  "I bet it worked, huh?"

  "Pretty much. Umm, can I ask you a question?"

  "Sure. Don't know what kind of answer you'll get, though." Rawson turned and watched a slight smile cross his daughter's face.

  We are a lot alike. Lex parked the truck so she could give him her undivided attention. "Would you like to stick around here for a while? Maybe get to know one another again?"

  He blanched. "No." Seeing the hurt cross her face, he realized she deserved an honest answer. "What would you want with an old rodeo man, girl? You've gotten along just fine all these years without me."

  "I've acted like a spoiled child these past few days, Dad. I'd like to try to make it up to you, if you'll let me." Lex took his hand in hers. "Please? You know I've never asked much from you, but give me this, will you?"

  "You don't want me, Lexington. You want the man you remember."

  Lex shook her head. "No, I don't. I remember a man who was gone more than he was home, someone who I could never please, no matter how hard I tried," she corrected, somewhat bitterly. "But I'm a grown woman now, and I'd like a chance to know who you are now, not try to find the man who deserted us as kids."

  Rawson cleared his throat. "You don't sugarcoat things, do you?"

  "Nope. Guess I learned it from my old man," she replied quietly. "Stay, at least for a little while. If you get tired of us, you can leave."

  "I won't be staying too long, anyway," he mumbled.

  AMANDA HEARD THE back door slam and bootsteps thump their way through the hall. She smiled and straightened the quilt that was lying across her lap. Martha had helped her into the bed earlier, so she could prop her leg and get a little bit of rest. Lex stepped into the room, her black hat low over her eyes. "Did you have a nice visit with your father?"

  "Yeah, I guess." Lex's voice was hoarse. She stood next to the doorway as if she were unsure of what to do.

  "Why don't you come over here and
tell me all about it," Amanda offered, patting the space next to her. "Martha's gone back to her place for a while, and your grandfather went upstairs for a nap."

  Lex sniffled and sat on the bed. A moment later, she stood and paced over to the windows, looking over the barren landscape. "He's going to stay, for a while. He wants to stay at the bunkhouse, with the men."

  "Well, it's better than nothing, isn't it? Did he say how long he'll stay?" Noticing the stiff set of her lover's shoulders, Amanda wished more than ever she were able to stand and walk over to where Lex was.

  "Probably only a month or so." Lex's voice caught on the last word.

  Seeing the upset in Lex's posture, Amanda tried to maneuver herself back into her chair, causing the vehicle to turn over. "Blast it!"

  Lex spun around. "Hey." She rushed over to the bed and sat. "Calm down, sweetheart." She wiped away a stray tear from Amanda's face.

  "I'm sorry. It's just so aggravating right now," Amanda sighed. She noticed the red, puffy eyes and dried tears on Lex's cheeks. "What's wrong? Did something happen? You said he was only going to stay a month or so. Did he give you a reason for leaving so soon?" Her heart broke at the anguish in her lover's eyes. "What?"

  "He's dying, Amanda. He wanted to see us one more time before he died. He was just going to say hello, and leave without telling me."

  Amanda cupped Lex's face in her hands. "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry."

  Chapter Twenty-One

  THE EVENING'S DINNER had been a subdued affair. Although Lex hadn't told anyone else of her father's illness, the family sensed something was wrong and acted quite somber. Travis was actually civil to his son-in-law, and Charlie and Martha sat silently next to each other as well. Amanda had finally livened the group by telling Rawson the story of Janna's bull, and how Lex had a new admirer of the bovine persuasion.

  The rodeo rider felt proud of his daughter, although he shook his head at her questionable bravery. "I don't know if I would have been quite that calm, Lexington. I've seen what those beasts can do to a body." He felt for his glass of water. "I reckon I'd be coming back to the house and cleaning out my britches, at the very least."

  Lex laughed. "I was anything but calm, Dad. I just didn't know what else to do. When Amanda came charging out of the jeep waving a shovel, I didn't know whether to be proud of her, or scared to death for her."

  Rawson studied Amanda with a thoughtful eye. "Just what did you think you were going to do?"

  "Ah--well, I don't know. I wasn't thinking. I only knew I couldn't just stand by and let him hurt Lex." Trying to change the subject, Amanda spoke to Martha and Charlie. "What do you two have your heads together about? Should we be worried?"

  The sheriff shook his head. "We've come to a decision, and were trying to figure out the best well to tell everyone." He glanced at his fiancée. "Do you want to do the honors?"

  "I might as well, since you've already teased everyone about it." Martha met the gazes from around the table. "As you all know, the date for the wedding is coming next week. But, with all the excitement we've had lately," she smiled lovingly at Lex and Amanda, "Charlie and I have decided to postpone the whole affair for a while."

  "What?" Lex's head snapped around and she pinned Martha with a distressed look. "For how long?"

  Martha shrugged her shoulders. "Long enough, I suppose. It's not a big deal."

  Rawson frowned. "Wedding?" He had thought the housekeeper incapable of those kinds of feelings, since she had outright refused his pitiful attempts at proposing to her years before.

  Lex smiled broadly at the couple across the table. "That's right, I forgot to tell you. Martha finally said yes to Charlie's proposal."

  "Proposal?" Rawson was awestruck at the news. "How long has this been going on?" he asked the sheriff. Right under my own nose, maybe? That's why I wasn't good enough for her; she'd rather have a professional man. Women. Never did understand them.

  Charlie blushed. "For as long as I can remember, to tell you the truth." He smiled at his fiancée. "I've been after her for years, but she didn't want to leave the ranch."

  Lex laughed. "More like she thought I needed a babysitter," she joked.

  "And what's so funny, young lady?" Martha countered. "Do I need to remind you of some of the trouble you've been in?"

  Rawson turned to look at his daughter. "Trouble?" For some reason he couldn't form any coherent sentences.

  "It's not as bad as she says," Lex assured him.

  "No, it's probably worse." Amanda directed her attention to Martha. "Want to tell us some stories?"

  "Sounds like a good idea," Martha agreed, ignoring the outraged look she received from Lex.

  AFTER DINNER, RAWSON reminded Lex he would feel more comfortable staying at the bunkhouse, so he packed his meager belongings and was about to leave when she came upstairs and tried to stop him.

  "Come on, Dad. If you won't stay here at the house, at least let me give you a ride there. It's cold, and the sun's already gone for the evening."

  He shook his head. "I'm perfectly capable of walking, girl. I got this far, didn't I?" Rawson snapped. Seeing the hurt expression on her face, he softened his tone. "I'm not dead yet, Lexington. There's no need to pamper me."

  Lex swallowed the lump in her throat. "I realize that, you ornery old man. But I'd feel better if you'd let me do this one little thing for you." She picked up the pack he had placed on the guest bed. "I like to show up there at odd times, anyway. Keeps 'em on their toes."

  "I don't want them knowing about me being sick." Rawson pulled on his heavy coat and allowed Lex to carry his bag from the room. "The last thing I want from anybody is sympathy."

  "No problem. You might want to let Lester know, at least. He's damned good at keeping secrets." Lex wasn't about to tell her father of the old man's friendship with Travis, not seeing any sense in upsetting Rawson any further. They walked down the stairs in silence, and she stopped momentarily at the door of the den. "Let me just tell Amanda where I'm going."

  Rawson shook his head. "You've got it bad, don't you?" Seeing her eyes flash with anger, he raised one hand. "Hold on there, girl. I didn't mean anything by it. I think I'll go on outside and wait in the jeep."

  She tossed him a set of keys. "Go ahead and get it started, if you don't mind. The heater works well." Watching as her father left the house, she shook her head as she stepped into the den. "Stubborn old man."

  "Hi, honey," Amanda greeted from the bed. She hated laying about so much, but her leg was beginning to ache and the pain medication always made her fall asleep. "Did I hear your father?"

  "Yep. He's bound and determined to stay at the bunkhouse with the men," Lex sighed as she walked over to the bed and sat. "So I talked him into letting me drive him there."

  "I bet that went well. He's almost as stubborn as a certain woman I know."

  Lex raised her lover's hand and brought it to her lips, placing a soft kiss on the knuckles. "Oh? Do I know her?"

  "Uh-huh." Amanda nodded, and began to squirm slightly when she felt Lex nibble on her fingers. "Oooh. God, Lex. You'd better stop, before I--"

  "Before you what?" Lex asked, turning the hand over and kissing the inside of Amanda's wrist.

  "Hmm?" Amanda shook her head and pulled her hand away. "Be good."

  One dark eyebrow quirked. "I thought I was." Lex stood. "I've got to get going before Dad takes off walking." She saw Amanda reclined comfortably against the headboard. "Is there anything I can get you before I leave?"

  Amanda shook her head. "Nope. I've got the phone right here. Martha, Charlie, and your grandfather have gone to her house. I think Travis is trying to make them set a new wedding date."

  "I don't think I like leaving you here all alone." Lex ran one hand through her hair as she thought for a moment. "I know." She quickly walked into the adjacent office, coming back out with two items in her hands. She handed Amanda one of the handheld radios. "Keep this by the bed."

  "It's not necessary," Amanda objected, but acc
epted the offering anyway. "You're not going to be gone long."

  Lex shook her head. "Humor me, will you? I'd feel a lot better if I can keep in contact with you."

  "Oh, all right. I'd like to keep tabs on you, too. No telling what kind of trouble you could get into from here to the bunkhouse."

  "Brat." Lex leaned over and gave Amanda a long kiss. "Keep the bed warm for me. I'll be back in a flash."

  BRIGHT EYES GLITTERING with insanity watched from the nearby trees as the jeep left the ranch house, and a tiny giggle escaped from the figure dressed in solid black. "Perfect. Looks like everyone has gone for the night." She had seen Amanda's Mustang parked at the Cauble's house in town, so she assumed her daughter was spending the night at her grandparents. She had not been in contact with any family members since being escorted from the hospital, so she had no way of knowing Anna Leigh had driven the car back a few days before, so they could store it in their garage while Amanda recuperated. Lex refused to drive the classic vehicle, stating her old work truck would suit her fine.

  Stealthily retracing her steps through the trees, Elizabeth went back to get her car. She had parked it in a clearing nearby to keep it from being seen from the road. I'll take away that bitch's house, so Amanda will have to come home with me. She stopped shortly when the black knit hat she was wearing became hung on a low branch. "Dammit," she squawked, as she wrestled with the tree. "Let go of me." Finally breaking free, the angry woman dusted off her clothes and continued to the clearing. Maybe I'll burn the trees, too. That would teach them.

  Elizabeth continued to ramble to herself as she climbed into her rental car. Once there's no house to live in, Amanda will want to come home. I just wish that woman would be inside when it burns. Unnatural bitch, seducing my poor innocent Amanda.

  She drove over the dirt road slowly, trying to navigate without headlights. Such a barbaric place, this is. No theater, no museums, and not one decent tea service to be found within a hundred miles. "How do they survive?" she asked the empty car. A heavy rut in the road nearly threw her into the steering wheel. And these roads. Abominable. "It won't be long, my dear. I'll have you home in no time."