Merciless Queen: A Dark Mafia Romance (Varasso Brothers Book Book 4)

by Sophia Reed

  19

  Stacy

  It took me a while to come down off the high of my night out with Gabriel, and even when I could feel my feet touch the ground, I still had that weightless feeling like I could take off again at any time. I was bummed that I couldn’t bring Gabriel back for another night together, but it was probably one of the things I had to start getting used to if I truly was going to commit myself to his life.

  As soon as his car drove away after dropping me off, I went into the living room, first to clean up the empty buckets of ice cream and the spoons we’d used to consume them. I ducked to grab the items and was consumed by Gabriel’s lingering smell. His voice still licked against my ears and gave me chills. I hoped whatever was going on with his family wasn’t too serious. I might not be able to take waiting too long to get him in my arms again.

  I walked into the kitchen, contemplating what else I may have to change about my life to accommodate Gabriel’s. I grabbed a pen and pad to jot down my notes and carried them into the bathroom. I turned the dials above my wide, whirlpool tub and flicked my hand through the rushing water until it was to a temperature I liked. I flipped the metal mechanism that pressed the stopper down into the drain. I added some epsom salt and essential oils and then turned my attention to other things while the water ran. I lit some candles, turned down the lights to a soft glow, and peeled my dress off. I walked it into my bedroom to discard it in my hamper and returned to the bathroom to set my notepad on the small cliff of the tub out of reach of the water, turn the dials off, and then settled myself down into the water’s warm embrace.

  I grabbed the notepad, crooking myself at an angle in the tub where I could hold the notepad out over the edge, while I was nearly turned to my stomach in the bath, and set to writing. I started by making myself a t-chart. On the left, I planned to list things I’d have to adapt to, and on the right, I wanted to put the solutions. Things were already stressful for Gabriel, and I didn’t want to add to it by demanding a normal relationship I knew I wouldn’t get. He was worth it, so as long as I went in fully prepared, I should be okay. One could hope, anyway.

  Over the next hour, I let the water relax my body while I tried to imagine what my relationship with Gabriel was going to look like. I remembered him mentioning that his sisters-in-law were all pretty strong, and I wanted to make sure I measured up to them. If that was his idea of what women should be like in this world, I wanted to be that or better.

  I made all sorts of notes about the different little things that I thought could frustrate me and justified them with Gabriel’s sweet and undying devotion. All I had to do was tell him I was trying to go vegan, and he was making veggie ravioli and buying vegan ice cream. He’d gone beyond out of his way to prove that he loved me, so any issues that I foresaw I knew would be swallowed up in his attempts to make it up to me. I had to make a note in the margins not to let him get too carried away. It was just a hunch, but after hearing the story about his first girlfriend, I got the sense that he’d spoil me rotten if he could. I wasn’t a material person and was generally much easier to please; I’d need to make sure I mentioned as much.

  I’d flipped over the notepad to its fourth page of notes when I heard a dull, distant thud from the first floor. I did a mental scan of my house, trying to imagine what object could have fallen to cause such a noise, but none came to me. It was a modern, newer house, so I didn’t think I’d be dealing with any foundation settling so soon, but when no additional noises found my ears, I wrote it off.

  I looked down at the notepad again, but my train of thought was gone. I was doing what my best friend and assistant had accused me of on more than one occasion—being a control freak. I had some born-in notion that I could somehow be prepared for any situation that came my way as long as I considered all the possible outcomes and behaved as if they all had equal probability. I’d been that way since I was young, and my parents had no idea where it came from, given they were people who could accidentally set their house on fire and write it off as a divine message. I was hardwired to want control, and maybe it was because my parents were so free-spirited. I had to make peace with the fact that things with Gabriel weren’t ever going to be in my control. I just had to trust him to take care of me, instead. That thought scared me, but even as it did, I thought of his hand laced into mind and committed myself to the compromise.

  I dropped the notepad and flipped back to relax against the built-in backrest, closing my eyes. The sweet vanilla scent from the candles swirled around me while the epsom salt continued to pull my muscles into total relaxation, and I didn’t fight when I started to doze. My body had a pretty good internal understanding of what was good for sleep and what wasn’t, so I trusted it to tell me when it was time to get out and move to my bed.

  I’d nearly slipped from consciousness when I heard another thump. That time, it sounded a bit closer. The houses on my block were close, but not so close that I should hear the antics from one lot over. Deciding it was time to investigate, I climbed out of the tub, pulled the silk robe hanging on the back of the door around myself, and slipped from the bathroom.

  The bathroom opened up directly into my bedroom, and I could clearly see that nothing was out of place, even with it covered in the shadows of darkness. The light from the kitchen was illuminating the lower floor, so I crept my way down the stairs and into the living room. Everything seemed in place there, as well, and I was already reserving myself to the idea that I was hearing things. I walked into my kitchen, and when I wasn’t met with any unusual sights, I swore at myself for cutting my bath short. Either my mind was giving me ghost sounds in my drowsy stupor or what I was hearing wasn’t in my house.

  I turned around, and right when I did, I heard a rapid series of knocks on my door. It made me jump a little, but Gabriel’s voice followed. “Stacy? Stace!” He sounded panicked. “Are you in there?”

  “I’m coming!” I called back. I giggled, thinking he was just that starved to get into me after our confession earlier.

  I started for the door but stopped behind the couch to undo my robe. If any neighbors were in the right place at the right time, they’d get a show, but that was fine with me. I’d never been shy about my body. I walked over to the door and reached out for the handle. My fingers curled around the silver handle, and then a click sounded off near my right ear, followed by the cold press of steel against my lower back.

  “Stacy!” Gabriel bellowed, pounding his hands against the door. “Let me in!”

  “How lucky,” an unknown voice growled behind me, and the freezing feeling against my back moved even lower. “You’ve unwrapped a perfect canvas for me and even invited an audience.”

  I couldn’t bring myself to scream. Maybe it was the barrel against my back or the shame washing over me. I’d allowed myself to get caught up in Gabriel, even knowing what I knew. I made it like a movie again. I let myself believe that love was enough to protect me, that as long as Gabriel and I wanted to be together more than anything, it would create some sort of invisible forcefield around me. Or maybe I’d convinced myself that I was already a mafia dame. That there were watchful eyes standing guard at Gabriel’s request. I’d notice them following me around one day and scream at him for not trusting me to take care of myself. The happily ever after I’d somehow deluded myself into thinking I’d achieved was one that didn’t exist in the real world. I gambled with my life, and I was about to lose.

  “Stacy! Stacy!” Gabriel was pounding against the door. Finally, his fist slammed even harder, and the next voice I heard was unrecognizable. It was Gabriel, but it wasn’t at the same time. It was that viciousness that he feared lay just beneath his surface—the ghost of his dad bubbling out. “I swear on my dead father, if you hurt her, you’ll be sorry.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, a second figure stepped out of the shadows, just as I could hear what sounded like Gabriel trying to break down my door. I hated opting for the stronger metal material at that moment. Being a single
woman living alone, I’d needed something more resilient for the very reason of not being broken down easily.

  “We’d better hurry,” the second body said. “He’ll find a way in, sooner or later.”

  The banging of my living room window proved that was true, but the continued pounding at my door told me that Gabriel wasn’t alone. I hoped I’d live to see who he brought with him. I side-eyed the figure next to me, with his broad shoulders and unkempt goatee and hair. He slid a pair of black gloves over his hands as my reinforced home served to harm me where it was meant to protect. The figure next to me cocked his fist while the one behind me slung a single, thick arm around my bare waist to hold me in place. The fist made hard contact with my eye, and when the second one flew at me, I blacked out.

  20

  Stacy

  When I finally came to, it was to the sound of a loud beep, pulsing against my head and rattling me down to the bones with each rhythmic chirp. Its screaming sound was second only to the overwhelming smell of bleach and other sterile smells. I blinked my eyes open, and even that sent jolts of pain screeching across my face. For an extended moment, I just stared up at the tan popcorn ceiling tiles. All attempts to count them resulted in them blurring against one another. The more I tried to focus, the more my head hurt until finally, my stomach lurched.

  “I’m gonna be sick.” I barely recognized my voice and nearly jumped when a bucket appeared in front of my face. I followed the arm holding it over to my mom. My stomach settled at the sight of her. “Mama?”

  My mom’s eyes were red and swollen from what I could only guess were hours of crying. “Hi, baby.”

  I pushed against the pain to turn my head in the other direction to my dad’s waiting smile. “Hey there, Stace.”

  “What happened?” I grumbled.

  My mom frowned. “We were hoping you could tell us.”

  I dropped into silence as my mind wheeled back over the past day. I remembered Gabriel coming over to my house for ice cream and talking to him for hours. I remembered him taking me to the hill and watching the city. I remembered him telling me he loved me and dropping me off at home so he could go and check in with his family. My head started to scream as I attempted to focus on what happened next. I had blurry, barely-there memories of my bath and getting out to investigate some sounds, but the rest was like trying to see through a broken viewfinder. There was darkness and pain and voices I didn’t know, but there was no clear picture. Everything felt so far from me, and I didn’t know how to make sense of it.

  “I don’t know.”

  I wanted to ask a question, but I didn’t know what to ask. “What happened?” I asked again.

  My mom’s already worried expression etched into even deeper concern. “Concussion,” she murmured.

  I searched my brain for that word, but the barking beep near my ear was distracting and demanded my attention. My eyes flew around the room, searching for the source until they landed on a machine near the corner of the bed I was laying on. It had a million flashing lights and numbers I couldn’t decipher, and it worsened my headache when I tried.

  “What’s that?”

  My mom looked over at the machine and then back at me. “An EKG machine, sweetie.” She touched my head lightly. “Do you know your name?”

  I retreated to my brain again. For a moment, I saw a woman in a mental mirror. The image was blurry at first, like a picture I might have drawn when I was six. Slowly, the hair came into focus, long and blonde, the blue eyes, the pink lips. I recognized her. Did I know her name?

  “Stacy,” I murmured out. “Stacy Everett.” I looked at my mom, considering her face for hints that I’d gotten the answer right. A forced out smile suggested I had. “Where am I?”

  “The hospital,” she replied. “The police called us to say someone had broken into your home.”

  “Did you try to fight them?” my dad asked. “We’ve told you a million times that material things aren’t important. We could have bought new stuff. It wasn’t worth risking your life.”

  “Carl, don’t lecture her.”

  My dad gasped a little and then smiled. “Sorry, sweetheart.”

  “A break-in?” I thought back on it, and it was like someone was slowly spinning that blurry memory into view.

  I heard thumps in my house and went to investigate. I didn’t find anything, but then Gabriel was there, knocking on the door. He sounded afraid. I remembered the two men; one of them held a gun to my back while the other put on gloves. Gabriel couldn’t get in, but he knew that he needed to. Did…did he know they would be there?

  “What is it, honey?” my mom asked. “Do you remember something?”

  Everything clicked painfully into place. Whoever attacked me did so as a result of Gabriel’s world. Whatever had happened, he’d been alerted that they were coming, but he’d gotten to me too late. They were already inside. They were waiting for him to get there.

  My mind tripped backward over the details my mom had given me and landed on police. “Did someone call the police?”

  “Someone must have, but when they got there, you were alone,” my mom said. “We thought maybe a neighbor, but no one lives in the houses on either side of you, and the neighbors across the street said they don’t know anything.”

  It had to have been Gabriel. Did he just leave me alone? I tried not to be upset at the thought. He couldn’t be there when the police showed up. What happened between him and those thugs? Was he okay? “My phone.”

  My dad bowed his head sadly. “It was among the items stolen. I’m sorry, baby.”

  My stomach twisted into knots. I had no way of getting a hold of Gabriel. The best shot I had was the number on his paperwork, but I had no access to that until I was out of the hospital. “I wanna go home.”

  My mom rubbed my head. “Oh, I know, sweetie. It’s probably best for you to stay with us for a little while. Until you’re healed up.”

  I didn’t have the energy to protest. “Okay.”

  I started to think about Gabriel and how lost I’d allowed myself to get. I didn’t lie when I told him that I loved him, but it was foolish of me to think that I could make a relationship with him work. We’d only been together a few weeks, and already, I’d made it to the hospital. Next time I could be dead. Or worse, they could go for my parents. I’d researched the Varasso’s crimes. I knew that they had enemies all up and down the eastern seaboard. Gabriel was the most innocent of his brothers, and still, my relationship to him had such a devastating effect on my life. It was going to kill me to have to break up with him, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I didn’t have a choice.

  “What is it, honey?” My mom rubbed my hand, being careful not to catch the IV that led into my wrist. I didn’t realize I’d started crying, but I had. “It’s okay. You’re okay now.”

  I wasn’t okay. I never would be. It hadn’t taken me long to realize that Gabriel was my missing piece. He was the thing that made my aura shine so brightly that my mom could sense it days later. No one in the world could bring me so high that I felt like I was about to start charting new galaxies. My hand in his felt like a continuation of my own bloodstream. When I felt his heartbeat against my skin, it was like feeling my own heartbeat, just in his chest.

  When we didn’t have the outside world to interfere with us, there was no denying our chemistry, and I doubted that I would ever find someone who made me feel the way he did. Yet, none of that was in the running for consideration. Gabriel Varasso was dangerous. If I had to choose between him or myself, I had to choose myself. Anything else would be illogical. Anything else would mean death.

  A doctor walked into the room with a clipboard in her hand. She looked over, and when she noticed I was awake, she smiled. “Oh, there she is. Hello, Ms. Everett.” I didn’t respond, and she didn’t push it. “How are you feeling?”

  I didn’t know which of my ailments to focus on. There was a headache pounding against my skull, snatching, shooting pains
coming from every corner of my body, I was almost certain I wasn’t getting signals to my left arm, and my stomach was still threatening to turn up at a moment’s notice.

  “What’s wrong with me?” I asked, instead. “The injuries.”

  The doctor and both my parents seemed to be confused by the question, but the doctor flipped a paper, folded it behind her clipboard, and then looked up at me. “You’ve got a nasty concussion, a cracked right eye-socket, a broken left arm, multiple contusions across your arms, torso, and legs, and a few bruised vertebrae.”

  I remembered the man who held me, making mention of my naked body as he held me at gunpoint. “Were there…” I looked at my parents, and my voice died.

  The doctor pulled the clipboard against her chest. “Mr. and Mrs. Everett, could you please give us a few moments?”

  I saw the disappointment in my parents’ eyes and grabbed my mom’s hand as she started to move. “No, it’s okay.”

  The doctor smiled at me. “It’s normal to not want to share certain details in front of others.”

  My dad touched my forehead. “Really, angel. It’s okay.”

  “I want you here,” I responded. “Just, please don’t ask me about this further, okay?”

  My parents both settled back into their seats on either side of my hospital bed. My mom nodded. “Okay, honey.”

  I steeled myself and opened up to ask my question. “Were there signs of, like, rape?”

  Both my parents gasped, and I couldn’t bring myself to look at them. The doctor shook her head. “No. It seems whoever beat you bloodied and blue left it at that.” Her brow nestled above her eyes in a knowing glance. “Can you tell me what would make you ask that question?”

  I had to protect Gabriel. Even now, even knowing that we had to part ways, I wanted to be good to him. I wanted to defend him. He had no role in those men coming to my house, even if they came as a way to get back at him. Without even speaking with him, I knew that to be true. “I was expecting a date. It wasn’t him, but I’d…I was…I had undressed while I was waiting for him. When the burglars saw me, they were…excited.” I didn’t even like bringing the words to my lips, but I had to be sure.