I Gave My Heart To A Jersey Killa

by Tina J

  I sat the phone on the nightstand and reminisced about the things that took place in this very room. I wondered if it would ever happen again and if not, I had a lotta memories to cherish when it comes to my first time. I tossed the covers back and slowly moved my legs so I could leave.

  “Owwww.” I shouted out loud to no one. My pussy was sore but so worth the pain.

  **********************

  “Bitch where you been? Got everyone calling me looking for you.”

  “I just needed some time away. The shit with Freddy and leaving him is bothering me.” I moved past Ariel without looking in her face. She always knew when I was lying, and I promised VJ it would be our secret.

  “Yea well. The nigga showed up here and I told him you were at your parents.” I turned around.

  “I told him to give me some time. Damn he don’t listen.”

  “Armonie, he’s not going to let you go. Again, you need to tell someone. Shit, VJ almost mentioned it to Haven the night we saw him at the restaurant.”

  “What?”

  “Yea. I forgot to tell you because you were sleep when I got here and I left before you got up.” I told her to give me a minute to change and I’ll be down to talk.

  I hopped in the shower, threw some sweats on and checked my body for passion marks. Vernon sucked me from head to toe and I wasn’t sure if he left any. Not that I’d mind but if Freddy is stopping by, I don’t need him trying to kill me before I found a way to tell my family. I shouldn’t care what happens to him but when you’ve been with someone this long, you tend to care.

  I walked down the steps and overheard a voice I didn’t expect to. Walking into the living room there stood Vernon with his woman. I ping of jealousy shot through my body, but I didn’t say a word. I spoke and walked in the kitchen hoping no one noticed the difference in my walk. I damn sure did because I could barely keep my legs closed.

  “Are you coming back?” Ariel asked and hugged him. The girlfriend was rolling her eyes.

  “Maybe in a few months. I have things that need to be taken care of down there.”

  “You leaving already Vernon? I thought you and your boo were thinking about getting a place up here.” I smirked when no one was looking.

  “Maybe later. Right now isn’t a good time.” He kept his eyes on me.

  “I’m sorry to hear that. Too bad we couldn’t all go out one last time to have drinks. Next time.” I said.

  “Why you asking now?” Mecca said and Vernon shot her a look.

  “I’m just saying. We’ve been here a few weeks now and we haven’t been able to hang out. Why now?”

  “No reason and since you’re just asking. Some of us have jobs and can’t sit around twiddling our thumbs waiting on a man to come home.”

  “You’re right. Now I know why you couldn’t hang out. You’re the one who lets her man whoop on her.” Me and Ariel jumped up.

  “Don’t get mad at me. Shit, it’s the reason my man got his hand messed up. He was saving your working ass.” She folded her arms across her chest.

  “I deserve better right?” I was indirectly speaking to Vernon.

  “I deserve better than a man pillow talking with his woman about my business. I deserve better than a man who would use and abuse me. I deserve better than a man who would cheat on me too, right?”

  “She don’t know what she talking about sis. Don’t let her get to you.” Vernon couldn’t take his eyes off me.

  “I’m not about to let anyone get to me anymore. Fuck everybody.” I stormed upstairs and slammed my door. A few seconds later there was a presence behind me.

  “I told her the night it happened because she was at the club too. I never meant for her to bring it up. I apologize Monie.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck.

  “It doesn’t even matter. What happened between us is a distant memory and can never be spoken of so who cares right? You were my first and I appreciated the experience, but you should go.” I held back the tears stinging my eyes. I don’t even know why I was crying. I guess it’s because I thought he was better than telling my business. I understand why he told but damn.

  “Armonie.” I moved away from him.

  “Goodbye Vernon.” I sat on the bed with my knees pulled to my chest. I really can’t win for losing with men.

  “What’s going on and why she look upset?” Ariel barged in.

  “Nothing. I thanked him for saving me and thinking about certain things brought on some emotions. I’m good sis.” Vernon refused to look away.

  “VERNON!” Mecca shouted up the steps.

  “Have a safe drive.” He nodded and walked out backwards.

  “And here I thought you’d hook up.” Ariel said laying next to me on the bed.

  “Time wasn’t on our side.” Is all I said and dozed off. When I woke up it was midnight. I’m glad this day is over.

  Haven

  “I didn’t expect to see you.” This bitch I’ve been fucking for over a year said.

  “Move.” I pushed passed her and went straight to the kitchen. She always had beer stocked and I needed a drink.

  “The fuck you looking at?” I said to her six-year-old. All the times I’ve been here, this is the first time I met him.

  Yea the bitch had two kids at the age of twenty-four. Maybe that’s why her pussy wide open. Whatever the case, I come strictly for the head. I may slide in, here and there but not usually. I still fucks with her though because she cool as hell. I don’t always come to get sex from her, and we can have a decent conversation about anything. Outta my top five she’s number three.

  “You punk. Always coming over drinking up our stuff.” He poked is chest out and I wanted to laugh but I couldn’t. I asked to see what he’d say. How he even know what it is?

  “Nigga you drink beer?”

  “Why you questioning me?” I wanted to knock his teeth out.

  “Ant, what I tell you about talking to grown-ups like that?” Sharika said coming in the kitchen.

  “What I tell you about having different men around us? We don’t know him. What if he...?” I yoked his punk ass up.

  “Haven please put him down.”

  “Nah. He tough. Let his ass keep talking.” She started crying and I dropped him on the floor.

  “I don’t care how many niggas your mother has in here, you’re gonna respect this one.” I pointed to myself.

  “Am I clear?” I barked and he jumped.

  “Fuck you.” I snatched his ass up again, put him on my lap and beat his ass like he was my kid.

  “Haven Stop. Oh my God. Please.” She tried holding my hand but it didn’t do shit. I’ve never heard a kid speak like that and I fuck with ratchet chicks who have kids too.

  “Ahhh. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Please stop.” I pushed him off my lap and stood up.

  “Yo son disrespectful as shit. Where his father?” I was breathing heavy because I wanted to beat his ass some more.

  “He doesn’t know about him.” She put her head down after saying it silently. I glanced down at the boy.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you? That’s what’s wrong with him. He needs a man in his life.” She looked at me.

  “Get up!” The little boy hopped off the floor.” I sat in the chair and gulped down the beer. I had to in order to calm down.

  “Let me talk to your mom.” He hauled ass out the kitchen.

  “You’re the only one I’m...” I put my hand up to stop the lie. I don’t even know why she brought it up.

  “Sharika we’ve been messing around for a year and you have a one year old. I know for a fact these kids aren’t mine so go head with the lie. Why you not letting your other kids father help you?”

  “He in jail and I don’t want just any man around them.”

  “But I’m ok to be around them?” I questioned because she sounded stupid.

  “I didn’t know you were stopping by and if you noticed, he’s never here when you are.” I couldn’t debate that.<
br />
  “And besides, everyone knows who you are. I know you’re not a pedophile or rapist. You’re strong minded and...”

  “And you need to tell his daddy.” I cut her off because it’s the truth.

  “Why aren’t you telling his dad?”

  “He didn’t want kids and I did. We had unprotected sex all the time and we knew the consequences but when it happened, he wasn’t ready, so he says.” She put up air quotes

  “You knew them too and now you’re raising this kid without his father because you were being sneaky.”

  “I got tired of the abortions Haven.” She fell back in the seat.

  “Say what?”

  “I loved his father with everything I had, and he claimed to have felt the same. He got me pregnant and begged me to get rid of it because we were young. I agreed and six months later it happened again. We had the same conversation and like a dummy, I had another one. The last time I told him, he left me and said I was getting pregnant on purpose.” She let the tears fall down her face. I don’t know why but we never discussed her kids’ father until today. Maybe it’s because they weren’t here.

  “What?”

  “Exactly. I asked him for money to terminate it and he handed it over with no problem. I used the money to go stay with my mother in Texas for a few years so she could help me. Do you know he didn’t even look for me? So much for him feeling the same.” She shook her head.

  “How do you know he wasn’t.”

  “Because I had friends out here and he asked one of them where I went, she told him Texas and he said ok. Not once did he ask for a number, address, nothing. He went on with his life like I never existed.” I didn’t say a word. Something still sound suspect about her story but I’ll listen.

  “I only returned to Jersey because of a job.” She said and stood to throw the beer bottle away.

  “A job?”

  “Yea. My aunt works over at the post office and she got me right in with benefits and everything. I had a son and no job. I couldn’t pass it up.”

  “Well have you seen his dad?” She shook her head laughing.

  “How can I not? He’s everywhere I choose not to go.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Ant has a lot of money and power. If I approached him with my son, he may try to take him and I refuse to lose him.”

  “I thought you said he didn’t want kids.”

  “He didn’t at the time, but I follow his new girlfriend on social media and…”

  “Why are you following his girl and how do you even know who she is?” I asked because I don’t do social media, but I always thought it was dumb of people to follow someone they don’t talk to. You see what they’re doing and make yourself mad.

  “People talk and I still have friends out here who do hang out. Anyway, she posted a picture of the house he brought her, built from the ground up too. Guess who has no problem showing her off?” I can hear hate in her voice. How she mad at the new girl who had nothing to do with his choices all those years ago?

  “He’s older now Sharika, which means he may be ready to build and start a family.”

  “I get it but damn.”

  “Damn, what?” I asked.

  “I wanted what he’s giving her.” BAM! There it is. Sharika wants him back. I just shook my head.

  “That’s what your nosy ass gets for being on her page.”

  “Yea, I guess. I just hate to see how happy he is when we could’ve had three kids and whether we were together or not, at least I didn’t abort two of them.”

  “Damn.” I felt bad for her because women deal with this a lot.

  “She even posted a video of him asking her to move here so guess who put a transfer in to move back to Texas?”

  “I don’t agree with how he handled the situation, but you need to tell him.” I told her honestly because the man deserved to know. Its too many men out here tryna be a father and the woman won’t allow it for whatever reason. I feel like she’s being selfish because she’s mad he didn’t want her to have his kids.

  “No thanks.” She stood.

  “I’ll be right back and we can do whatever. Let me check on my son real quick.” I grabbed her wrist.

  “Another time. This shit just blew me.” I handed her all the money I had in my pocket and kissed her cheek.

  “Haven, I can’t accept this.”

  “Look at it as an apology gift for beating his ass.” She started laughing and tried to hand me the money back.

  “He needed it and we both know it.”

  “He did but I’m not his pops.” I went to the door and turned around.

  “Think about what I said.” She nodded and I walked out the door in deep thought. I wish a bitch would keep my kid from me but then again, their situation is crazy. So much for getting my dick sucked. On to the next chick and I hope she don’t have no drama.

  **************************

  “What Haven?” She answered the phone with an attitude.

  “Ariel don’t be mad at me. You know how we roll. You should’ve told your cousin before letting him pop shit.” I knew she was still mad over the restaurant situation because Armonie told me.

  “Haven you’d never let anyone speak to Armonie the way you spoke to me, would you?”

  “Hell no.” I stopped at the red light.

  “Exactly. He’s protective of me the same way you are of her. Everyone doesn’t need to know how we interact.”

  “Whatever. Can I stop by or not?” I wasn’t tryna hear shit she had to say.

  “Bye.” She hung up which only infuriated me. I sped over to their house and used my key to enter. I locked the door and walked straight to her room. I passed Armonie’s on the way and saw she was knocked out.

  “I said no Haven.” I closed her door with my foot, walked over to the bed and stood her against the wall.

  “You do too much and...” I never kiss but slid my tongue in her mouth anyway. I thought she’d push me off but instead lifted her legs around my waist.

  I put her down and stripped her outta the small ass pajamas she wore. Standing there naked, Ariel didn’t shy away from my gaze. She had total confidence in her body and she should. It was perfect and all hers. No plastic surgery, implants or nothing. 100% all woman and I loved that shit.

  “Come to me Haven.” She lifted her leg on the nightstand and used her middle and index finger to caress her pearl.

  “This is what you want right? We’re both here and it’s no time like the present.” I moved closer and replaced her hand with mine. She began grinding on my two fingers I slipped inside.

  “Right there Haven. Mmm. Yea.” I pressed my lips on hers and felt her unbuttoning by jeans. She pulled my dick out and rubbed the tip on her clit that was now sticking out.

  “I’m about to cum Haven.” She gripped my neck tighter, rubbed my shit faster and grinded on my fingers at the same time.

  “Oh shit. Oh shit.” Her body began to shake and I couldn’t hold out. I stuck all ten inches inside her.

  “Fuckkkk!” She screamed out and dug her nails in the top of my shoulder.

  “Haven. Go slow. You’re big as hell.”

  “This is what you wanted right? Your words.”

  “Yes. Shit.” She started kissing me again and popping up and down. I squeezed her ass and the two of us were now in sync.

  “Oh fuck. You feel so good. Shitt.” She bit down on my neck and left her face there to stifle the moans.

  “You wetting my dick up Ariel.” I looked down and it was almost white. She had already cum three times.

  “Haven.”

  “Yea.” I was still watching myself go in and out.

  “Tell me when you’re about to cum.”

  “Right now.” I wasn’t lying. Her pussy was wet and gushy the way I liked it.

  “Let me down.” She patted my shoulders.

  “What?”

  “Hurry up.” I did like she asked and grabbed on the dresser as she devoure
d me. I had to stare down to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. This nigga told everyone she didn’t give good head but the way my toes are curling and eyes are rolling, I’d say he’s mistaken.

  “Cum in my mouth Haven.” She licked my balls and swished them in her mouth like candy.

  “Yea baby. Here it comes.” The way she spoke drove me insane.

  “Mmmm. Shit, you taste good Haven. Mmm.” She took her time removing all my seeds. My breathing was erratic and no matter how fast I tried to calm down, I couldn’t. She had my ass stuck. She kissed up my stomach and chest before pecking my lips.

  “Did I clear up the false rumors?” I snatched her by the hair, stuck my tongue in her mouth and a few minutes later we were back at it. We fucked the shit outta each other for the rest of the night.

  “I’m out.” I said after getting my clothes on.

  “Ok. Lock the door.” She barely spoke because sleep was overtaking her. I stared down at the woman who sexed me better than any other woman I’ve been with and realized we could never do it again. She had the ability to get me strung and I’m good. At least I got to sample the pussy and head.

  Ariel

  “I thought you were leaving.” I said to Vernon when I stepped in my parents’ house. He passed by my place saying he was leaving town; yet here he is. I’ve been working nonstop and going to school; I probably would’ve have known if I came over sooner.

  “You rushing us.” Mecca snapped.

  “Bitch, I will slide your ass across this got damn room if you get smart one more time.”

  “Yea ok. Vernon you better get your cousin.”

  “He don’t gotta get shit. Ever since he brought you here, all you’ve done is bitch. No wonder he wanted to leave your ass home.” She looked over at my cousin who had a drink in his hand.

  “Shut the fuck up Mecca. You stay popping shit.” I smirked and moved past her.

  “Like I was saying. What you doing here?” He walked away without answering.

  “VJ, What the...” He put his index finger up to his mouth telling me to be quiet. He closed the patio door and sparked up a blunt. After he took a pull, he looked at me.

  “I don’t wanna leave her.” I gave him the side eye.