Artful Evil

by C. G Harris

  As soon as the truck rolled back onto solid ground again, my breath came out in a whoosh, and I collapsed to the dirt. If there were any more trains, trucks, or hand pumped carts scheduled to cross that bridge, I hoped it wasn’t until after our locomotive arrived the next afternoon.

  I couldn’t worry about it anymore. I had to get back. It was late, and I promised to meet Alex at Hula Harry’s so we could present Dan with the painting we retrieved. He hadn’t been there earlier, so we hid it in his storeroom. After all the trouble we went through to get it, we both wanted to see his face when we gave it back to him. I hurried through the darkness, using the moon as my lantern, and hoped Alex hadn’t noticed her missing pin while I was gone.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  By the time I got the Hula Harry’s, I was too exhausted to blink. Between our rumble with the demons in the morning, the trip to the railway in the afternoon, and then working on the bridge for the last few hours in the evening, I was stretched about as thin as a paper mattress. I didn’t want to deal with Alex, Dan, the painting, or anything else. I didn’t even want to stand. I just wanted to get this night over with so I could find the nearest soft spot and collapse onto it.

  “Where have you been?”

  I bit back a curt answer to Alex’s greeting and offered a smile instead.

  “Just working some bugs out at the shop.” I lied, hoping she hadn’t checked there before coming to the bar. “Sorry I’m a little late. The bugs were a little more persistent than I thought.”

  “They must have been filthy too. You haven’t even changed out of your Topside gear. You look like you’ve been rolling around in a rusty barrel.”

  I glanced down at my coat and pants and realized that I had not only neglected to change, I even forgot to brush off the evidence of my betrayal.

  “Yeah.” I made a show of sweeping off the metallic dust with my hands. “I had to dig into the foundation under the shop. That last firestorm really did a number on the place.”

  Alex stared at me while I tried to clean myself up then grabbed my wrist. “All right, you are just making it worse. Hold still.”

  The aggressive manner in which she began to swipe at my coat and pants seemed more like an assault than assistance. I endured the open-handed slap-brushing as long as I could—about five seconds—then I pushed her away, trying to defend against the onslaught.

  “Okay, that’s enough. Thank you very much.” I took a couple of hops backward for good measure. “Your help seems a little more ... enthusiastic than usual. Something wrong?”

  Her hand went straight to where she usually wore her lapel pin. Snap. She knew. I opened my mouth to try some sort of cover story, but Alex beat me to it.

  “I lost my lapel pin somehow.” She slumped back onto her stool and faced the bar again, looking more than a little distraught. “I can’t believe I did something that stupid.”

  I winced and sat down next to her. “Relax, I’m sure it happens all the—”

  “No, it does not happen all the time,” she snapped back at me. “Losing a lapel pin is no small thing. I have no idea what they’ll do to me.”

  I huffed out a laugh and regretted it the second the sound passed my lips. Alex shot me a sideways glare and then shook her head. “I wouldn’t expect you to understand.”

  “Whoa.” I leaned back on my stool. “Just because I play things a little loose doesn’t mean I’m irresponsible.”

  Alex eyed me without saying a word.

  “Okay, I might be a little irresponsible, but that doesn’t mean I don’t understand the definition of responsibility. I owned a dictionary ... once.”

  That drew a chuckle from Alex, and she turned her gaze back to the rows of useless alcohol lining the wall again. When she didn’t say anything, I unfastened her lapel pin from my collar and slid it to her across the bar.

  As soon as she saw it, her head jerked back in my direction. “You can’t do that.”

  I was about to tell her the truth when she shoved it back to me again.

  “You can’t give me your pin,” she stammered. “I mean, that may be the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me but ...”

  Her eyes went up to mine, and the words poised to come out of my mouth retreated back down my throat.

  We stared at each other like that for a moment, then I laid my hand over hers and pushed the pin back to her again. “Keep it. It’s yours. Don’t worry about me. I get in trouble all the time. Sabnack will expect me to lose my pin. It’ll be less of a shock.”

  The lie of omission tasted bitter, but the look of admiration in Alex’s eyes made it all worth it. Of course, if she ever found out I had stolen that pin in the first place, that amorous expression would turn to murder in a hurry. I decided to live in the moment.

  Alex peered down at our hands and then back up at me again. “Thank you. You know, sometimes you surprise me.”

  I smiled back at her. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure the next surprise is a bad one.”

  Alex giggled and stood up from her stool, leaning toward me. “Sometimes bad can be good.” She winked at me.

  My heart, pretty much my whole body, jumped into overdrive. In that moment, I didn’t care that she was the kind of person who could plan to ram a train into a town. All I wanted to do was to pull her close to me. I squeezed her hand. She smiled and took a breath as she leaned closer. Her lavender honey scent all but overwhelmed my senses. “Maybe I can show you how good bad can be.”

  I leaned forward ever so slightly, matching her move ... then Dan walked up and ruined the whole thing.

  “So how did it go this morning? I am dying to hear. Alex wouldn’t say anything until you showed up.”

  We both turned to face him. Alex was so close I could feel the warmth radiating from her body. Our dual stares were enough to make him fade back a step.

  “What?” Dan raised an eyebrow. “What did I say?”

  Alex sighed and backed away from me, and I resisted an urge to throw a glass at Dan’s head. I held onto Alex’s hand, letting it linger there for a moment before I reluctantly let go.

  “Come on. Let’s give it to him before he has a stroke.” Alex walked away, heading for the storeroom.

  “I may have a stroke.” I let the simple statement hang, and Alex laughed. But I followed her back, trailed close behind by Dan and his ever-present dish towel.

  When we got there, I made sure no one inside the bar could see us hit the panel leading to Dan’s secret room and opened it up. There wasn’t much space, but we had concealed the thin crate behind a stack of soda cases. When I pulled it out, Dan beamed with excitement.

  “I can’t believe you got this back.” He threw the dish towel over his shoulder and took the crate in his hands. “Did you check it out?”

  I nodded. “Sort of wish I hadn’t. That thing is horrifying.”

  Alex scoffed as Dan set the crate against the wall and worked the top free. When she got a look at the horror show for herself, she recoiled.

  “Whoa, who would want something like that? The only thing that painting’s good for is years of therapy.”

  Dan nodded. “That’s what this Hellion likes. The creepier the better. He put in a special request for this one.”

  “If he has something creepier than this monstrosity, I don’t ever want to see it.” I shivered.

  Dan fastened the top back onto the crate and beamed at the both of us. “I don’t know how I can ever repay you, but I swear, someday, I will.”

  “Let’s stick to the free drinks for now.” I winked. “We can discuss terms on indentured servitude later.”

  “Gastrith said he would send one of his minions to the drop spot tonight. I need to run if I am going to make it in time. I hate to ask one more favor, but how would you two feel about closing the place up for me? Everyone’s pretty much gone. All you have to do is lock the doors on your way out.”

  “Free reign in a bar? That’s like one of my all-time bucket list dreams,” I exclaimed.
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  “Too bad you already kicked the bucket.” Alex chuckled. “Go ahead. We’ll get the place buttoned up for you. Don’t worry.”

  Dan smiled again. “Who knew Judas Agents were so nice?”

  “Don’t tell anyone,” I shouted as he walked out the door. “Or Alex will have to live up to her reputation.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  We watched Dan walk out the door, then I turned to Alex and winked. “Dad’s gone, and we have the whole place to ourselves. Whatever shall we do?”

  Alex shot me a sly grin then walked back over to her usual stool and sat down. “I’d say we should raid the liquor cabinet, but that won’t do any good. Besides, last time we had a drink together, I swore I would never touch the stuff again.”

  I remembered the atomic fusion hangover from our little Topside indulgence. I swore the same thing; although, I still needed to find out about the magic white pills I had gotten in Judas’s office.

  “I say we give these nice folks another half an hour, then show them the road.” Alex reached over the bar and cracked open a fresh can of Coke. “I don’t want to be wandering the streets too late.”

  I scoffed. “Alex Neveu, the big, bad Judas Agent, scared of the dark.” I poked her shoulder. “Who would have guessed?”

  Alex gave me a dangerous look and sipped her Coke. “Things in the dark are scared of me. I just want to give them a fighting chance.”

  Her deadpan was perfect. I busted out laughing while she continued to sip her Coke, looking like Molly the Mass-Murderer.

  My laughter died down, and she slurped again. “Okay, now you’re starting to freak me out. Can we talk about something else?”

  “Fine.” She broke her stare and set her Coke on the bar top. “What do you want to talk about?”

  “I have something I want to show you. Wait here.” I hurried away from Alex and her psycho persona and headed for the storeroom again. When I came back, I held an item I had hidden in one of the back corners. It was wrapped in one of Dan’s dish towels, concealing it from the few prying eyes that still remained in the bar.

  I set the item down on the bar in front of Alex and pushed it toward her.

  “Do you have any idea of what this does?”

  Alex eyed me for a second then pushed her glass aside. “A gift? I feel like it’s a little early in our relationship. I really shouldn’t.”

  “It’s not a gift. I mean, if you want it, I guess you can have it. I didn’t think you wanted—”

  Alex held up a hand to halt my stammering.

  “Take it easy, smooth operator. I’m just kidding.”

  Alex pulled back the folds of the towel and examined the box I had retrieved from my shop earlier. She squinted at the mess of circuit boards and wires for a few seconds, then her eyes went wide, and she covered it up again, shooting hurried glances over her shoulder to see if anyone had been watching us.

  “Have you lost your mind? Where did you find this?”

  I shook my head and helped her cover the box, suddenly infected by her panic. “Zoe had a bunch of them stacked in the old bus at the shop. What is this thing?”

  Alex peered over her shoulder then leaned in toward me.

  “It’s a shield generator. One of the hard-wired varieties. Hellions use those to protect things near and dear to their heart. Something like that Cadillac I took a joyride in. The operative word is Hellion.” Her voice was a harsh whisper full of urgent frustration. “Any Woebegone with one of these in their possession gets an automatic trip to a torture mart that makes the Wax Worx seem like Disneyland. You need to get rid of that thing and don’t get caught or losing your position in The Judas Agency will be the least of your worries.”

  I swept the box off the counter and hurried it back into Dan’s secret room. It would be safe enough in there for now, at least until I had enough time to get rid of it permanently.

  When I walked back out to the main area, Alex still sat on her stool, sipping her Coke, looking a little too casual to really be relaxed. I sauntered across from her like a wind-up doll with a stick up his butt and leaned against the bar trying to look cool as well.

  After a few seconds of strained silence, I broke the spell with the obvious question.

  “What would Zoe be doing with something like that? With lots of them in fact. What could she be trying to protect that wasn’t already protected? The shop is reinforced and has withstood more firestorms than I can count. Do you think she is building her own super-black-market center?”

  Alex snorted. “Why would she do that? She practically runs your shop, and it’s almost too big to fly under the radar as it is. Can you imagine a Zoe-Mart in neon letters with shopping carts and handicap parking?” She laughed. “I’m pretty sure someone would notice that.”

  I slumped. “So, what then?”

  Alex glared into my eyes. “Not—your—business.”

  She annunciated each word but then she backed down a little bit. “Well, actually she’s storing them in your shop, so I guess it is your business. But you know what I mean.”

  “I just—”

  Alex put her hand on mine and stopped me from finishing the statement. “Let’s talk about something else.”

  I sighed. “Fine.”

  I couldn’t help but notice that Alex didn’t pull her hand back. She kept it there, covering my fingers with her warm touch. I swear she had a superpower that short circuited my brain every time she touched my hand. I struggled for anything to say. After a minute, I blurted out the only thing that came to mind.

  “Do you think Jake could be working with Simeon for a cure to stay Topside?”

  I had no idea why that thought vomited out of my mouth. I hadn’t made that connection—possible connection—until that very moment. Either way, it had the exact romantic effect you might expect.

  “Are you trying to piss me off right now?”

  Alex pulled her hand away, and all I wanted to do was reach over, pull it back, and start over again.

  “I’m just saying, it’s weird that we ran into him near Simeon’s building. It almost feels like too much of a coincidence.”

  Yup, Rico Suave has nothing on me.

  “I don’t care what Simeon’s doing.” Alex gripped her glass so hard her knuckles turned white. Suddenly, I was a little glad my digits weren’t within harm’s way after all. “I don’t even care what Jake is doing. Simeon could offer him the fountain of youth, and I wouldn’t lift a finger to stop them. There’s only one thing on my radar right now, and it goes choo-choo, bang. Anything else is background noise.”

  Now it was my turn to recoil. I stood up straight and crossed my arms over my chest. “Are you sure you only want to hear the bang? Maybe we should set up a couple of lawn chairs up on a hill where we can listen to the people scream. I’d hate for you to miss a moment of your masterpiece.”

  Alex stood out of her stool and slapped a hand onto the bar. “Set it up. I’ll bring my pom-poms and a cheerleader outfit.”

  Before I could say anything else, she swept her arm across the bar, knocking over her half empty glass of Coke and headed for the door.

  “Why don’t you handle things here? You’re good at the whole Lone Ranger thing. I need to get some sleep. I have a lot of disaster to cause in the morning.”

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Despite all the planning and visits, we almost missed the train when we arrived at the rail transfer station the next morning. I would like to take credit for the debacle, but for once, it wasn’t me. Alex and I had failed to take into account one key factor. Trains were long—more than one hundred cars long. As it passed its final inspections and got ready to carry on to its destination, the engine was nowhere near the actual train yard. It was more than a mile down the track, and we were on foot. By the time we got there, the train had already begun to creep forward.

  We both jumped onto the head locomotive. Alex paused at the base of the stairs and made sure I made it on but didn’t hurry up to the cab.


  “I need to know you’re with me on this.” She gave me a thin-lipped stare that said no amount of humor would ease the moment.

  “You’re my partner. I’m backing you, no matter what.” Alex nodded, and I waited until she turned away to say, “Even if I don’t agree with what you’re doing.”

  She didn’t hear that last part, of course. The wind and the sound of the roaring diesel engines drowned out all except the loudest of noises.

  Alex got to the access door to the engineer’s compartment, counted to three, and then jerked the handle open. I half hoped it would be locked. Assumed it would be. Who drives a gazillion pound train without locking the doors? Even soccer moms lock their doors when they drive to the grocery store.

  Alex rushed up the stairs and had the first guy in an arm lock, holding her Luger to his head before I cleared the platform. He wore blue-striped overalls and sported an actual engineer’s cap. The second guy, a portly man in rugged blues and round, gold rimmed glasses, stood back from his control panel and put his hands up.

  “Down the stairs.” Alex sounded so wild and desperate that I followed her instructions before Glasses and Overalls. Glasses came down behind me, and then Alex clambered down with her captive.

  We all stood outside the cab, perched on the locomotive’s outer walkway. Everyone held onto the railing, trying to compensate for the train’s movement and the vibration of the tracks as we gained speed. “Are there any other staff members on the train? Anyone who can stop this thing?” Alex shouted over the roar of the diesel engines.

  Glasses looked at his partner, and I saw the panic bloom in their eyes.

  “You can’t do this.” Glasses shouted back. He must have been the actual engineer. “The throttle’s set to accelerate. It will keep going until …” His eyes went up the track as if he could see Bozeman miles over the horizon. “It won’t stop.”