Light Through the Window

by Cassandra Morphy

  "Not unless you're taking the Global Rail back," Alex said. "This thing leaves bright and early at seven tomorrow morning. If you're not on it, too bad."

  "Oh, but Al," Ellie whined, doing her best Katey Sagal impression. Back when they were together, Alex had told her she had had a crush on her growing up, with some of her earlier work. Her perfect impression ended quite a few fights between them.

  "No buts," Alex said, unaffected by the impression. Ellie pouted at her in the mirror, but Alex continued driving without looking back.

  There were no hotels listed on Google for the town that the hospital was in, or anywhere near there. The closest place was three towns over, by the highway. It gave them some much needed distance between them and the place that Ellie had just broken into. It also gave her a few minutes to skim more of the files that she stole. Ellie was never one to have problems with motion sickness and could easily read a full-length novel during a long car ride without problems. She managed to get halfway through Natalie's file before they were pulling into the parking lot for the hotel. Most of the front half of the file was notes on her several sessions with the doctor that she had for most of her time in therapy, this Dr. Mendez. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary in those early years, all things considered. But that didn't necessarily mean anything in the long run. By the time the truck was parked, Ellie had convinced herself that the next move would be to look up this Dr. Mendez guy.

  "Come on," Alex said, through a yawn, as she stepped out of the car. "I'm going to crash."

  "Anything interesting so far?" Becky asked, as she, too, climbed out.

  "No, but it's still early," Ellie said.

  "No. It's late. Very late," Alex said.

  Alex led the way into the hotel. The lobby was dead quiet, with no one in sight. All of the lights were out, except for a small one behind the front counter. Alex continued onward into the dark, almost as if she could see in it. Ellie clung tighter to the files, half expecting someone to jump out at them from the dark and take them from her. She still wasn't sure if there was anything of value, anything of note, in any of them, but she was already afraid of losing them. As she came around the corner, though, she was able to see what Alex had seen, another lit section off to the side, this one containing the elevators.

  "Come on," Alex said, as she hit the button.

  The elevator took a minute or so to get to them. The entire time it took, Ellie eyed the darkness around them, though it wasn't nearly as dark as the eyes that had been staring at her for weeks. The fact that it was a different kind of darkness was almost comforting to her, like this darkness wasn't allied with the abyssal eyed people, just from that difference alone.

  Given the late hour, Ellie wasn't surprised in the least that the elevator was empty. They took it up to the third floor, where the lights were still on along the hallway. Ellie started to relax as they headed over to their room. Alex flashed the keycard across the sensor, which gave a familiar and friendly beep, beep, click. Once Alex pushed open the door, Ellie and the others pushed her inside.

  "Hey, watch it," Alex said.

  "Sorry," George said. "Gotta pee." He headed over to the bathroom, slamming the door closed.

  "Whatever. TMI."

  The room was smaller than Ellie had pictured, with the two beds barely big enough to be called queens. The chair that George had mentioned was positioned in the corner, angled just so that there was enough room to get between it and the edge of the far bed. There was no desk, no table, a small closet next to the bathroom, and the TV was bolted to the wall, rather than being on a dresser. This was a good thing, though, as there wasn't room enough for a dresser there. The beds came within three feet of the far wall.

  "Lovely," Ellie said. "We could only afford one of these?"

  "Just be thankful we could afford this one," Alex said. "If we don't budget what little money we have left, we might run out of gas before we make it back to Chicago. Then where would we be?"

  "My guess would be somewhere in Indiana," Ellie said, sarcastically.

  Ellie hopped up onto the edge of the bed, spreading out the three files. She was hoping to get through Rebecca Anne's mother's file before going to sleep, though it was clear that Alex and Becky had other thoughts in mind. What with the last-minute departures and all, none of them had bothered to bring a change of clothes. Alex just pulled off her jeans and climbed into bed next to Ellie, not bothering to say anything. Becky didn't even bother with taking off her pants, or with the covers for that matter, collapsing right onto the other bed. She fell down on the diagonal, making it clear, even in her half-asleep state, that no one was welcome in the bed with her.

  Alex flipped the switch to the lamp next to the bed, the only illumination in the room, dropping it into darkness. Ellie hadn't quite learned how to read in the dark, so she quickly gave up on trying to get more out of the files that night. She carefully moved them back into a pile, feeling her way around the edge of the bed until she found the back corner. There was nothing there, just flat empty floor, so she placed the files carefully down, hoping no one would accidentally step on them in the night. Not thinking much of it, she pulled off her own jeans and slipped into the bed next to Alex.

  Ellie couldn't sleep. Her mind kept going to the pile of files in the corner. A couple of times, she even reached over to it, hoping that her eyes had adjusted to the darkness enough to make some of it out. The second time that happened, George opened the door to the bathroom. The light was still on in there, and it completely ruined her night vision for a while. George came back over to the chair in the corner, flopping down onto it with a grunt, followed by a long, heavy sigh. He stuck his feet up onto the corner of the bed, in the space that Ellie didn't take up from being so short, and quickly started to snore. With George blocking her from one direction, and Alex from the other, the brief thought about slipping into the bathroom for some late-night reading quickly ended.

  She rolled over, trying to put the files out of her mind by giving her back to them. This put her a lot closer to Alex than she had been expecting, a lot closer than she would have liked to have been at that particular point in time. But, before she could slip away from her, Alex turned over in her sleep. Her arm flipped out and over Ellie, grabbing her up and pulling her closer to her. Their faces were right up against each other, though Alex seemed oblivious of the fact. Ellie, on the other hand, could think of nothing but.

  Suddenly, all the feelings she had for Alex came flitting back to her. Ellie had been trying not to think of them since she came back into her life, trying to focus on just being friends with her, like she said. That was obviously easier said than done though. This was the one that got away, her first love, the girl of her dreams. Alex looked the same as she did that last day, that heartbreaking day when she dumped her. Even her smell was the same, the touch of her skin on hers as electric as it always was. If things were different, if they had never broken up, that would have been exactly where she would have wanted to be. Even in the darkness of the room, she could still make out every detail of her face, her own memories filling in the gaps where her sight failed her. Alex's perfect lips seemed to glisten in the dark, capturing and reflecting every little lumen of light that the room had to offer. Drawing her in, drawing her closer.

  Ellie licked her lips, edging closer to Alex in the dark. Only the faint memory of her girlfriend, of Mare, kept her at bay. She knew that, if Alex woke up, if she knew what was happening, how close they were, she would be right on the same page. The same thoughts would be playing their way through her mind as those playing through Ellie's. Alex smiled, as if she were only feigning sleep in an attempt to lower Ellie's guard, to make her remember the feelings they had once shared. Ellie's hand went to Alex's shoulder before she realized what she was doing.

  A door slammed in the distance, jarring Ellie out of the spell she was under. The thin walls of the room saved her from making what she was thinking would have been a huge mistake. Not trusting herself in the least
, she flitted out of bed and onto the small amount of floor between it and the wall. With the path to the bathroom blocked to her, that was the only safe place for her to spend the night. She only bothered to reach up and grab a pillow from the bed, thanking her lucky stars that she was small enough to fit in the tiny space.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  The Welcoming Party

  Ellie wouldn't look at Alex for the entire ride home. It helped that she had something to focus on. She buried herself in the files that she had stolen from the hospital, focusing on trying to find anything that was in the files. Anything that might help them understand what they were up against. The other three seemed content to fill the void that her silence left in the car, no one even mentioning her obliviousness to the world around them. Or, at least, not that she heard.

  Alex dropped the other three off at the school soon after dark. Ellie wasn't sure how long she was sitting in the back of the truck with Alex calling to her before she realized they were there. As she left the truck, Alex gave her one of her old smiles, the ones she used to give when they were still together. Just like back then, it sent her stomach all a flutter. She pulled the files close to her chest, trying to use them as a shield against the power that Alex still had over her.

  It didn't help that she still hadn't told Mare what was going on with her. That this secret she held was bringing Alex and her closer, while it drove a wedge between the two that were actually dating. If only she could trust that Mare wouldn't have done something stupid, that she wouldn't risk everything to protect her, Ellie would have told her about it all from the beginning.

  As distracted as she was by her own emotions, she didn't notice it when Becky and George ran off ahead of her. They left her behind, with muttered words about the dinner they had missed, the meals they had skipped while on the road. Before she realized it, she was alone again, and surprisingly surrounded by the same old eyes staring at her from every direction. Being suddenly re-immersed in that world seemed to quickly erase any benefits being away from it would have done. She was left to walk through the gauntlet of abyssal eyes alone, with just the files as protection from those unwanted stares.

  Ellie was beginning to recognize the same faces in the crowd. Faces that she didn't know the names of. Faces of people that she hadn't interacted with beyond those stares. There were a lot more of them than she would have liked, especially with most of them surrounding her. None had moved to block her way as she made her way across campus, heading towards the cafeteria, the same direction her friends had gone in.

  As she turned around a corner on the path, suddenly the nameless faces broke way to what Ellie had started considering the inner circle of the group. Standing by a tree in the middle of the path were Barry, Miranda, and Rebecca Anne. They flanked Sam, who was leaning against the tree. Ellie held the files closer to her chest, practically merging the folders to her skin, as she tried to hide them from Sam. It seemed like another kick to her stomach when she noticed Vern mixed in the middle of the group, though his usual blue eyes were a balmy salve to her injuries.

  "Ah, Ellie," Sam called out to her. He raised his arms towards her, invitingly, as if to call her into a hug, though they were still far too apart to do so. "We were beginning to wonder what happened to you. You didn't head to your dad's house like you did last time you were hiding from us." Those words were another punch to her gut. She had forgotten that Alex had let it slip that she had been hiding out at home. Had the group gone there in her absence? Had they found her father, alone and unaware of the very real danger around him? Ellie was suddenly very aware that Sam's mother's file was on the top of the pile, facing the man that would, and probably could, do anything to protect his mother's legacy.

  "Break into some other building, perhaps?" Vern said. Though his voice was teasing, Ellie still flushed to the thought. "Perhaps."

  "Anyone we know?" Sam asked. "What's that you got there?"

  Sam jumped away from the tree. The crowd instantly cleared his way towards Ellie, leaving a wide path. There was plenty of room for Sam and his ego. Ellie blinked and Sam was suddenly right in front of her, reaching out to the folders in her hand. She jerked them away, slipping them behind her back. But Rebecca Anne was suddenly behind her, ripping them free.

  "Well, well, well," Rebecca Anne said. "What do we have here. Natalie Jennings. Robert Gunderson. And... What the fuck."

  Sam's eyes went wide, threatening to loose the darkness within. "What the fuck, indeed," he said. "You have been busy haven't you. At first, I thought you were just being shy, maybe a little coy. Now, I think you're just being stupid. What the fuck. How would you like it if I tracked down your parents?"

  "Her dad works here," Rebecca Anne said. Ellie wasn't sure if she was reminding Sam of that fact or threatening her with the reminder that she knew exactly who he was. "Very human."

  "Oh, yes, right. Human. Well, for now at least."

  Ellie looked around at the crowd, hoping to find some source of rescue. The problem was that the only pair of regular eyes, of human eyes, belonged to Vern. It appeared that he had gone over to the dark side. She wasn't sure just how much he knew about what he had gotten himself into, or if he would switch sides if he did find out. If the situation were different, she might have even felt sorry for the guy.

  "At least her mom died for the cause," Sam said, pulling Ellie's attention back to him. The mention of her mom was like a slap to her face. What did her mom have to do with any of this? "Oh, don't like me bringing up your mother, do you? Maybe you should have stayed out of our families' business then." Sam grabbed the pile of files from Rebecca Anne, somehow tearing the entire stack in two in one fluid movement. "Derick, take our little rebel here over to that alley behind the physics building and teach her what we do to traitors."

  "Traitors?" Ellie scoffed. As if she was already one of them. As if she would ever join them.

  A boy emerged from the mob assembled against Ellie. He was barely taller than her, and about as petite. His face looked mean, like it was permanently molded into a scowl. As he came over to Ellie, the rest of the group slowly started to disband, heading off into the night as creepily and as quietly as possible. Before they left, though, before she had a chance to escape, to run for her life, Derick came over behind her. He wrapped his hands around her wrists, forming thick flesh handcuffs to keep her in line. His hands were stronger than she had thought possible, showing that his form was misleading.

  He pushed her forward, weaving in and out of the departing group. Ellie wasn't too concerned about them. She wasn't really concerned about the man behind her either. All she could think about was the alley, that things seemed to be coming full circle. She was going back to the alley where that student had died not two years earlier. Where her father had been pushed into a van by his kidnappers. Derick wouldn't have known about the symbolism; he didn't seem like he could spell symbolism. Sam might have, he would have been at the school at the time, and it was such a Sam move to order it.

  Ellie didn't notice it when the crowd had left them behind. She didn't notice it when it was down to just the two of them. She should have been paying better attention, should have been waiting for a time to turn the tables on old Derick back there. Instead, she was just trying not to throw up. Trying not to panic or pass out. She knew that she needed to keep her wits about her, but those were quickly fleeing.

  The world started to make sense again as the alley fell into focus. It was like the very sight of it, the smell that always reminded her of freshly spilt blood, woke her up where the fear hadn't. Instead of starting to struggle, though, instead of trying to turn the tables on Derick, Ellie fell to her knees right there in the alley. Tears found their way to her eyes, falling quickly and heavily onto the concrete beneath her. Derick's hands fell away, no longer restraining her, not keeping her up or holding her in place.

  "It didn't have to be like this," Derick said. His voice was low, deep, but not mean, not like his face. It was filled with sym
pathy, with fear, with doubt. "Why didn't you just fall in line? Why didn't you just join us like you should have. You still could. It's not too late."

  "Ellie?" came another voice, one further behind her, back towards the entrance to the alley. Ellie looked behind her, around the looming form of Derick, towards Becky. She was standing there, alone, staring over at the two of them.

  "Becky," Ellie called out to her. "Run."

  Derick turned, facing the newcomer, the interloper, the witness. With his attention no longer on her, with those eyes directed elsewhere, Ellie was freed of the fear that had consumed her. As Derick started to lumber towards her roommate, towards her friend, Ellie's training finally snapped into focus.

  She reached out, grabbing him around the wrist, twisting his arm. When her own strength proved insufficient, she dropped to the floor, adding her weight to the effort. Still, he seemed like she was little more than a nuisance to him. He tossed her aside as if she were a fly. She went down on the cement hard, rolling with the momentum until she slammed into the wall.

  "Ow," she grunted, but she was already back on her feet.

  She ran forward, her sprinting skills coming to bear once more, putting her in his path towards Becky. Derick punched towards Ellie, barely paying attention to the movement as he continued forward towards his new target. Ellie grabbed his wrist again, this time using his own momentum to pull him forward. She flipped backwards, pulling him with her, and landing two kicks into his stomach. He flew forward, slamming into the same wall that she had, only he crumpled into a ball at the base of it.

  "Are you okay?" Ellie asked, though Derick hadn't gotten anywhere near Becky.

  "Am I okay?" Becky asked. "What about you? That was awesome."

  "Well, I--" Ellie's words were cut short when she was grabbed from behind. Derick's arm was suddenly wrapped around Ellie's neck, tight enough to block off her airway. She hadn't been expecting the move, had been in the middle of talking, so she barely had enough breath to keep her conscious. Her mind reeled as she panicked, desperately trying to pull oxygen from the air that she didn't have access to anymore. She felt herself about to pass out, her balance quickly fading her. Fortunately, as she leaned backwards, she felt Derick adjust his footing. In a last-ditch effort to save herself, to save both of them, she pushed off of the ground with what little strength she had left in her small body. Derick pitched backwards, bringing her with him.