Light My Heart (Crystal Shores Book 1)

by Terra Kelly

I paused for a beat and then forced the words out. “Mackinac City.” He didn’t say anything for about ten seconds. “If it’s too far I understand.”

  “No. I’ll see you soon.”

  What just happened? He seemed worried which confused me. For the last thirty days it was like walking on eggshells around him, now he was determined to see me.

  I sent him a text message with the name of the hotel, my room number, and the zip code for the exact location. Then I grabbed my purse from the passenger seat and made my way to my room.

  I threw my stuff on the dresser and flopped down on the bed. My room was not inviting. All I wanted was to be back at Eddie’s house. I closed my eyes and tried to let go of the emotions clouding my judgement.

  Sometime later I heard a light knock at my door. Then I heard Eddie whisper, “Sarah? It’s me.”

  I had fallen asleep because it was more entertaining than anything on TV. “Hold on.” I hopped up and turned on the light. It took me a moment to get my surroundings because I went down hard. My feet were not working properly and I stumbled toward the door. The moment I opened it my heart skipped a beat. Eddie knew how to take my breath away.

  “Hi.” He shoved his hands in pants pockets.

  “Hey.” I ran my fingers through my hair. It was possible the nap caused my hair to end up in every direction but down where it should be. “Want to come in?”

  “It’s late. I just wanted you to know I’m here. We can chat in the morning.”

  “Um, sure.”

  “I’m two doors down.”

  “You didn’t have to do that. You could stay here if you want?” The words popped out of my mouth. Eddie staying in my room was a very bad idea. “I mean, if you want.”

  “It’s okay.” He flashed his heart stopping smile. “Want to get breakfast in the morning?”

  “Sure.” I felt awkward and my tongue was tied. “Um…I’ll see you in the morning.” I watched him take the few steps toward his room. Before he lifted his key card to unlock the door I closed mine.

  Holy shit, Eddie was here.

  I turned off the light and made my way back to the bed. I tried to fall asleep but now I was overthinking about a man two doors down from me. Instead of sleeping I tossed and turned all night. After about four-thirty I must’ve dosed off because the next thing I remembered was my alarm blaring next to my ear.

  I grabbed my phone and hit snooze. I noticed a notification on the screen. It was a text message from Eddie. “Good morning.”

  The clock on my phone read 10:00. Shit, I overslept. “Good morning. I’m sorry. Did you eat already?”

  “Nope, waiting for you. Want to try the little cafe around the corner from the hotel?”

  “Do they have pancakes?”

  “Of course. Doesn’t everyone?”

  “Perfect. Give me twenty minutes.”

  We didn’t say a word on the two-minute drive to the cafe. Honestly, I didn’t know where to start. Then I decided on the forward approach. I slid into the booth and rested my arms on the table. “Why are you here?”

  He rested his hands on the menu and laced his fingers together. “You get right to the point.”

  “Maybe. I’m just confused.”

  “About what?”

  “You haven’t talked to me for thirty days. Well, barely. Now you’re here.”

  Eddie moved his fork back and forth between his thumb and index finger. “Sarah.” He stopped talking for about thirty seconds. Then he lifted his head and looked right at me. “This isn’t easy for me to say.”

  “Should I help? You don’t want me around. I’m in the way.”

  He reached for my hand. “No, stop, please. That’s not it.”

  “Then just say it.”

  “A month ago.” He cleared his throat. “I realized I had feelings for you and that scared the shit out of me.” He took a drink of the water the server had just dropped off. “You’re the first woman since my wife I have thought about in…that way.”

  “What way?”

  “I can’t get you out of my mind, Sarah.”

  “So you stopped talking to me?”

  “I know. Not my brightest moment.” He combed his fingers through his hair. “Can I share something with you? But it’s going to sound crazy.”

  “Um, okay.”

  He looked around the room and then back at me. “When I realized I felt something for you…over a month ago…something happened and I saw my wife.”

  “You saw her? Like in a picture or video?”

  “No, I mean she was standing in the shower with me. I know this all sounds ridiculous.”

  It didn’t though. A few years ago, I had a similar experience. I promised myself I would never tell anyone because not everyone believed in ghosts. Now, here we were at a diner in Mackinac City having breakfast together and I was about to share my secret.

  “It’s not.” I rested my forearms on the table. “A few years ago I met a woman who inspired me to move out. My dad was getting worse and I couldn’t take it anymore. I worked as a certified nurse’s assistant at the time. The woman had cancer and tried with all her might to fight the horrible disease. She passed away about six months after I met her but she fought until the bitter end.” I needed a moment before continuing. It was difficult to talk about Cheri. “I made her lunch daily. I would sit with her and we seemed to always get on the subject of my dad. She shared the best advice and it was the catalyst for why I left North Carolina.” I cleared my throat and took a drink of water. “When she died, I struggled with the loss because I wanted more time to talk to her. I was still doubting myself and needed more of her advice. That probably sounds selfish.”

  “No, not at all.”

  The waitress arrived at our table with our order. “Triple stack blueberry pancakes.”

  I rubbed my hands together and grabbed the fork. “Long story short.” I pushed my fork down through the layers and then stuffed the bite into my mouth. “I adored her and miss her dearly,” I said with a mouthful of pancakes. “About a year after she passed I was training for a half marathon. There was one particular day where I needed to complete a six-mile run and I was dragging. I was just about to give up but then Cheri appeared in front of me with her hands on my shoulders pulling me forward. She had the most beautiful smile, I can still see it today. So yeah, it’s not crazy.”

  Eddie had his mouth full. He swallowed. “I’m sorry.”

  “I’ve never shared that story with anyone.”

  “Thank you for trusting me.”

  “Thank you for being here.” We stared at each other for the longest moment.

  “Did you complete the half marathon?”

  “I did. Well, I ran half and walked the other half.”

  “That’s amazing. Was Cheri with you then, too?”

  “She was.”

  I noticed Eddie’s smile fall. He stayed silent for several minutes. He lifted his head and looked directly at me. “Maybe my wife was letting me know it was okay to move on. I mean, she made me promise to find love. I never agreed because I wasn’t ready then.”

  “Are you now?”

  “While I was driving up here, my mind went to my wife and then it would drift to you.”

  “And?”

  “I know I wasn’t ready for you to leave Crystal Shores.”

  The waitress came over to refill our coffee. “Would you like anything else?”

  “Could I have an order of bacon?”

  “Bacon? You’re still hungry?” Eddie splayed his hands over his stomach and groaned.

  “I stress eat.”

  “Really? Well, we need to get over to the island so you can stress eat on homemade taffy and fudge.”

  His words took me by surprise. “You want to go to the island with me?”

  “I want to do a lot of things with you, Sarah.”

  “Oh…we should get a hotel on the island?” Again my mouthed flapped before I thought it through. “Or not…”

  “Jan is wa
tching Kelsey for a few days. I would love that. Can I ask you another question though?”

  “Um, sure.”

  “Is this what you’ve been doing all this time, running from your past?”

  “I…yeah, I guess I have been.”

  “Sarah, we both need to stop running.”

  “Maybe…”

  “First, let’s enjoy some taffy and homemade fudge.”

  “Together.”

  “Together.”

  We stared at each other for several minutes. My mind replayed the last twenty-four hours. I went from leaving this beautiful man to planning a new adventure…together. Someone needed to pinch me because this couldn’t be real.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Eddie

  “Have you had a pasty yet?” I pointed to a small building across the street.

  “A what did you say”

  I grabbed her hand. “Oh, you haven’t lived until you’ve had one.” I tugged her toward the little restaurant. The island was not huge but when on foot it felt like the roads went on and on forever. I was looking forward to sitting.

  “I feel like I've been eating all day.” She sat down and wrapped her arms around her waist.

  “Oh, do you want to head back to the hotel instead?”

  “No, I need to know what this pastry thing is you’re talking about.”

  “Pasty.” I tried not to laugh but failed. “It’ll be worth it, trust me.”

  When we arrived on the island, I decided we needed to stay at the fanciest hotel, which basically meant we would need to get a room at the Grand Hotel. The hotel has 393 rooms and no two rooms are alike. From the outside it felt like you were at the White House with all the white paint and the gorgeous pillars lining one side of the building. Everything seemed perfect until the attendant at the front desk told us they had one room left. One room with one bed.

  I ordered two pasties. “Prepare to have your mind blown.”

  “I’m ready.”

  We were seated at a table by the big bay window in the front of the restaurant. A horse-drawn carriage passed by and several people were walking in and out of the little shops.

  “I’m surprised to see the island still so busy this time of year.”

  “Well, Michiganders don’t think this is cold yet. This is warm to them.” It was true, sixty degrees was nothing.

  “Look, another person wearing shorts.” I noticed her body shiver. “Nope, too cold for me.”

  She had on jeans, a sweatshirt, and a jacket. “Your Southern blood is still too thin. Just wait, in about a year you’ll wear shorts and complain you’re too hot.”

  “A year, huh?”

  “I guarantee it.”

  The waitress arrived with our order. I grabbed my fork and leaned closer to the table. “Okay, you take the first bite.”

  She turned her head to the side. “This isn’t a trick, right? I take a bite and you start laughing.” She poked at the top a couple times.

  “No trick. They’re one of my favorites.” I held my right hand up. “Scout’s honor.”

  She giggled and dug her fork down through the crust. As she took the first bite, I watched her face to see if I could tell if she was enjoying it or not. When she stopped chewing I got a little worried.

  “Holy crap.” She pointed the fork at the pasty. “That’s amazing.”

  “Yeah, you like it?”

  “Like? More like, I love it.”

  “And now you have been initiated.”

  “Oh yeah, does this mean I can call myself a Michigander now?”

  “Um…” I looked around.

  She reached forward and placed her hand on mine. “I’m teasing.”

  I studied the expression on her face and realized I loved this moment. She had stirred up emotions I thought were gone.

  I wanted more time with Sarah with an h.

  “You may need to roll me to the hotel. Why did you let me eat that last bite?” Sarah placed her hands on her stomach and groaned.

  “I made you?”

  “You said, and I repeat, I double dog dare you.”

  “Okay, I may have done that.”

  She nudged my shoulder. “And I never back down from a dare.”

  The moment the words left her mouth you could see her face turn a few shades of red. “Oh really?” I didn’t plan to let that comment slip by unnoticed.

  “Well, I mean…”

  “Come on.” I grabbed her hand and tugged her toward the beach.

  The sun was just setting on the horizon of Lake Huron. There were boats off in the distance and several people on the beach throwing rocks in the lake. Some were snuggled together under blankets. We made our way down the wooden steps that lead to the beach. I still had a hold of Sarah’s hand as we descended the stairs. I could feel her hold on my hand tighten.

  “You okay?”

  “What? Oh yeah.”

  We reached the landing, and I heard her exhale loudly. I looked back. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “I am now.”

  “Should I get someone to airlift you out?”

  “Are you mocking my fear of steep stairs?”

  “Me? Nope.”

  She ran at me and tried to tickle my side. I jumped out of the way. Finally, I let her catch up. We were both out of breath and collapsed onto the sand at the same time.

  I rolled onto my side and propped my head on my hand. Her hair was up in a ponytail and small wisps of hair were blowing around her face. I had this urge to pull the hair tie out and run my hands though the long silky strands.

  We went from laughing to serious. “What else are you afraid of besides stairs?”

  Her smile quickly faded the moment I asked the question. “Um…”

  “Sarah, please don’t say me.”

  Her eyes went wide. “What? No.” She let out a heavy sigh. “I’m afraid to go back to our room,” she sighed.

  I sat up. “I don’t expect anything from you. We’re two adults. You take the bed, I’ll take the couch. It’s that easy.”

  “What if I don’t want that?”

  “What do you want?”

  We both sat there staring at each other. After several long seconds, she whispered, “You.”

  “Me?” She was better than me. I wasn’t prepared to tell her what I wanted. She did. I reached for her hand. “I want that, too.” After spending more than twelve hours together. I knew she needed to come back to Crystal Shores with me. This couldn’t end yet.

  “I’m scared though. You would be my first.” I went to say something, but she held her hand up. “Let me explain. The men I have been with were not for romantic reasons. They were more of a one-night stand and they all ended up being a mirror image of my dad. I’ve had sex. I’ve just never experienced that special moment with a man.”

  “But you have experienced a mind-blowing orgasm, right? I mean, there are other ways to make that happen.”

  “Um…not mind-blowing and I feel uncomfortable trying the other things.”

  What was happening right now? Well, there was only one thing to do. I stood and held my hand out for her to take. “Hop on.” I pointed to my back.

  “What? No. I’ll hurt you.”

  “I do this for a living. Come on.”

  Sarah hopped on my back and I took two steps at a time back up the stairs. When we reached the landing I had to pause for a moment to catch my breath.

  “Are you okay?” Sarah placed her hand on my shoulder. The hotel was about ten yards away and I wanted to be in our room like ten minutes ago. “Eddie. Why are you rushing?”

  I stopped a few feet from the hotel entrance. “Because I can’t wait another minute.”

  “For what?”

  “To pull your body close to mine.” I let her down and turned to face her.

  The next words I wanted to say caught in the back of my throat. Letting her know I wanted to be her first seemed too forward. It was the truth though, I did want that and so much more.

&
nbsp; Chapter Eighteen

  Sarah

  At the entrance to the hotel I stopped. “Wait, Eddie.”

  He stepped closer. “What’s wrong?”

  “I…I don’t know.” Of course I was lying, I did know. The thought of having sex with Eddie scared the shit out of me.

  He reached his hand up and circled it around the back of my neck. “I’m sorry. I let my emotions get the better of me. We don’t need to rush this.”

  I placed my hand on his cheek. “No, please don’t apologize. It’s just, I want what happens between us to be perfect.”

  Eddie slid his hand around the side of my neck just below my ear. “I have to do this now.”

  “Do what?”

  “This,” he said and bent to kiss me.

  The moment our lips touched it was like waves crashing on the shore or fireworks going off all around. I realized with that one kiss this thing between us was real.

  I stepped back and stared at him for a moment. “Tell me you felt that, too?”

  A smile emerged. “What?”

  I knew he was messing with me. I did a bold move and placed both my hands on either side of his face to bring him closer. “Eddie, what am I going to do with you?” Then I kissed him. The delicate pecks soon became more heated and a little moan slipped from my throat.

  “Sarah–” he pulled away and was breathing heavily– “can we go to the room now?”

  Our lips were a breath apart and his body was molded to mine. We were so close and yet he found a way to inch closer to me. The outline of his erection was against my belly. The feeling of him next to me sent shock waves all the way to my core.

  “We really should get to the room.” I combed my fingers through his short hair.

  “One condition.”

  “Only one?”

  “One for now.” He placed his hands over mine. “We both agree to stop when we feel uncomfortable.”

  “No pressure.” I finished his sentence.

  “Exactly.” He held up his hand. “Pinky swear?”

  I grabbed his pinky with my own and shook. “I swear.”

  We stood there for a few more seconds. Finally, I grabbed his hand and finished the tugging process into the Grand Hotel. It was around dinner time, so the place was filled with people walking in all different directions. I felt like all eyes were on us as we made our way to the elevator. He had my hand and kept it tucked in between his own behind his back.