Holden's Resurrection (Gemini Group Book 6)

by Riley Edwards

“Yeah, Jameson took it.”

  Soon there would be no reminders of Paul Towler. None. That man had no place in their lives and he would go to great pains to make sure every memory was wiped clean.

  “Appreciate everything you both did for us,” he told his friends. “I’m gonna grab my girls and go home.”

  “Bet you are.” Alec smiled.

  “Good after all these years to see you happy,” Rhode added.

  Holden’s eyes sliced to Rhode and the truth hit him, and when it did, it rocked him.

  “I was happy before I knew the truth. Faith was going to be mine. I had Leigh-Leigh back and we were building a future. What you found was icing. It doesn’t change the way I feel but it might help my daughter. I’m not saying I’m not forever grateful, because I am. But I’ve loved Charleigh all these years thinking she slept with Paul and together they made something precious. I was jealous as fuck, but I never stopped loving her. Never stopped wishing Faith was mine. You finding that intel is a dream come true, but I was already living a new dream. Knowing that the motherfucker lied doesn’t make me love her more. I started all of this misery when I was stupid enough to take the word of a doctor and not trust Charleigh with what I thought was relationship-ending news. She would’ve made me get a second opinion, she would’ve been smart enough to know even doctors make mistakes. But I pussed out and ran. That’s on me and I’ll have to find a way to move past it.”

  “You will. I’ve learned that with the right woman by your side it doesn’t matter what life throws your way—you find a way around it. You and Charleigh will come out of this stronger than you were.”

  Fuck yeah, they would.

  Unbreakable.

  He knew all too well what it was like to live without her. Never again would he be separated from his girls.

  Holden turned to Rhode and offered the other man his hand.

  “Be safe. And I hope you know you can always call on us if you need anything.”

  “I do and I will.”

  When their hands released, Holden slapped Alec on the shoulder.

  “I still haven’t read over your report. And honestly, it’s doubtful I will tonight. Anything I need to know about your meet with Donna Lot? Did you get anything?”

  “Nothing. She talked to us, but it was the same thing she told Jonny. And she refused to allow McKenna to look at her computer or cell. The woman is beyond traumatized. She needs serious help, but she refused that, too. Her house sold. My guess is she’s either gone or packing up as we speak so she can get gone. The woman wants away from this place.”

  “Do you think she’s been threatened?”

  “I think she’s a woman who lost her only child in a horrific manner and she blames herself for not seeing the signs.”

  Holden thought about that for a moment and could see how the mother would blame herself.

  “It’s not her fault.”

  “You know that. I know that. But Donna Lot will never see it that way.”

  All the more reason to catch the son of a bitch who had harmed Kimberly. Donna deserved a slice of peace. Not that it would ease what happened or stop her pain, but anything they could give her would be worth it.

  “I’ll see you in the morning. Thanks for taking Faith today. Hope it wasn’t too much trouble.”

  “Get the fuck out of here with that noise. We loved that girl before we knew she was yours. She’s always welcome here. And now that Rory and Faith are “BFFs To The End of Time” and that’s a direct quote, you can expect my daughter at your house and yours at mine. Though you and I are gonna be having a talk about this little shit named Andy.”

  “Right? Leigh-Leigh told me I can’t hunt him down and wring his neck, though I will be finding the kid’s dad. The little fucker tries to kiss my daughter I won’t care he’s eight, that shit ain’t happenin’.”

  Rhode damn near busted a gut laughing, but Holden didn’t see the humor. He was dead serious. No boy was putting his lips near Holden’s daughter.

  32

  “And this was my seventh birthday.” Faith proudly pointed at the picture of herself and her friends all in silly hats on the beach.

  Holden smiled and ran his finger over the edge of the plastic-covered corner. The same way he’d done with each picture Faith had stopped on to tell a story.

  There was something about how he touched the images, reverently, worshipfully, adoringly. And the way he stared at the pages of the album as Faith flipped through, like he was trying to soak in the memory.

  It was both heartbreaking and heartwarming. He’d missed out on everything.

  Faith got to the last page and announced, “That’s all of them.”

  “But you’re eight,” Holden retorted.

  “Mom hasn’t made that one yet.”

  “You haven’t?”

  “I make them right before her birthday,” I explained.

  “And on my birthday we look back over the year. It’s a tradition.”

  I smiled at Faith’s excitement. What had started as me spending my daughter’s birthday looking back over the last year with a sadness only a mother understands, reminiscing, noting how much she’d changed and grown, had turned into something more. And I loved that Faith was always anxious to look at the album I made her.

  “So on your ninth birthday, you’ll get your eight-year-old album?”

  “Yep.”

  Holden looked over at me and my breath caught—unbridled emotion. He wasn’t hiding anything from me and in turn, he wasn’t hiding anything from our daughter. He was showing us both he’d enjoyed looking over Faith’s life.

  “That’s cool of you, Leigh-Leigh.”

  “Does this mean you’ll stay and be my dad?”

  Every muscle in my body contracted, my eyes felt like they were bugging out of my face, and I would swear I was experiencing heart failure. I couldn’t feel it beating, or maybe it was beating so fast that it was one continuous flutter, making me light-headed.

  “Wh…what?” I stammered, unable to get my breathing steady enough to ask more.

  To Holden’s credit, he didn’t look as freaked out as I did. Actually, he was grinning.

  “Why would you ask that, doll?”

  Faith shrugged.

  “Because you’re my dad, right?”

  No, I was experiencing heart failure now, and I was definitely dizzy. When neither of the two adults in the room spoke—which would’ve been the thing to do, except I was having an out-of-body episode and Holden looked like he was in shock—Faith looked between us, then continued.

  “You’ll stay this time, right?”

  Holden’s shoulders jerked and his torso followed. Thankfully, we were sitting down or Holden would’ve fallen on his ass.

  There was no malice in Faith’s question, just innocent intrigue.

  “Yeah, Faith, I’m staying. And, yes, I’m your dad.”

  “And that’s why you wanted to look at my books?”

  “Yeah. I wanted to see everything I missed. It’s not the same, nothing will ever make up for the time I missed out on being with you and being your dad. But I still want to see the pictures and hear all the stories.”

  Faith nodded like she was a thirty-five-year-old woman and she found Holden’s answer acceptable. I, on the other hand, was confused. Unless my daughter had somehow come into magical powers that included mind reading, I wanted to know how Faith knew Holden was her dad. Unless she was just being an eight-year-old girl who wanted a dad however that came to be.

  “Why’d you ask if Holden was your dad?” I’d softened my question with a smile, but when my daughter bit her lip I wasn’t sure if I’d succeeded. “Honey, I’m just asking why you’d think he’s your dad.”

  “He is, right? And he’s gonna stay with us. He won’t leave this time?” Faith’s voice had gone shrill and her eyes darted around the room.

  The eye thing was her tell—when she got upset she didn’t hold eye contact.

  “Yes, he’s your dad. What
I’m asking is, how did you know?”

  When her teeth sank into her lower lip and tears sprang in her eyes, I reconsidered my line of questioning.

  “C’mere.” Holden lifted Faith off the couch and set her in his lap. Immediately her little body melted into his.

  I wished I had my camera. I wished the situation wasn’t what it was because that would’ve been a great picture to include in Faith’s album.

  Daddy and daughter. Faith leaning into Holden looking for comfort.

  God, we screwed up.

  “Faith, I’m not leaving, no matter what. When I left your mom, I didn’t know…” Holden paused and I held my breath, waiting to see how Holden was going to explain to an eight-year-old the circumstances surrounding him leaving me. But what I didn’t even think about was taking over the conversation. That wasn’t because I was a chicken shit, but because I trusted Holden would do his best. And together we’d answer her questions.

  “I didn’t know your mom was pregnant with you. And when she found out I was…” There was another pause, this one longer, this one painful. I swallowed the lump in my throat that was so big it was a miracle it didn’t choke me. Holden had tears in his eyes, then I had tears in mine when Faith reached up and placed her hand on his cheek.

  “Are you sad you’re my dad?”

  Horror passed over Holden’s face before he covered her hand with his.

  Another moment I wished I could capture. The tips of Faith’s tiny fingers were barely poking out from under her dad’s much bigger hand.

  “No. I am not sad I’m your dad. I’m sad I missed out on you growing in your mom’s belly. I’m sad I didn’t get to see your beautiful face when you were born. I’m sorry I didn’t know you were my daughter and we missed out on so many years. But, Faith, I promise you I’m gonna make it up to you. I swear, doll, I’m gonna be the best dad. I know this is confusing, but I want you to know I didn’t leave because I didn’t want you.”

  “Do I get to live with you?”

  “Yes. You and your mom.”

  Faith grinned, then her grin turned into a full-fledged smile and she said, “You, me, Mom, and a puppy.”

  Holden’s face split into a matching smile and he agreed. But I wasn’t thinking about life with a puppy and all that came with a small, needy dog in the house. No, I couldn’t take my eyes off the similarities between the two of them. All the small things I had shoved aside over the years and eventually stopped looking for altogether. But now that I was free to compare, it was plain to see.

  “Aunt Patty said that Mom was stupid,” Faith announced. “She told that man that they were running out of time. That I looked like Holden and now that he was back he’d start asking questions. Then she told him all it would take was a N-A-D test and Holden would know he was my dad.”

  “DNA,” Holden mouthed, then asked Faith, “Did Patty say anything else?”

  “I was getting sleepy,” Faith muttered. “And my tummy felt funny. I was scared.”

  “I know you were, doll. It’s okay if you don’t remember anything else.”

  “Patty was mad at the man and was yelling that he better not have…killed Mom…or they’d never get the money.”

  God, those bitches. Money. It was always about the money.

  “They will never hurt you or your mom again.”

  “Patty said Mom would give them the money to get me back.”

  Holden stared at Faith and pulled her closer.

  “Faith, your mom would’ve done anything to get you back. Anything, you hear that? Any. Thing.”

  “I know. She sent you.”

  “She did.”

  Hours and hours of pent-up emotion, years and years of pent-up frustration, years of agonizing loneliness and loss finally broke free. I was tired, so damn tired I couldn’t hold it in. I couldn’t even hold my body upright so I slumped forward and gave Holden my weight. And just like I knew he would, his arm came around me and my arm went around Faith and together we held our daughter.

  Finally.

  Freaking, finally.

  Holden Stanford lay awake in a big bed that was not his and stared into the dark. To his right, his daughter slept with her hand in his. To his left, his Leigh-Leigh had fallen into a restless sleep. He knew this because in the hours since they’d come upstairs, he hadn’t closed his eyes, not once. He was too afraid if he did, he’d wake up to find it was all a dream.

  Charleigh’s body jolted and he pulled her tighter against his chest and waited. She settled in and nuzzled his chest.

  Heaven.

  He held heaven in his hands.

  Everything he’d ever wanted was in that bed. His Leigh-Leigh and their daughter.

  His.

  Then he lay there in the dark remembering all the plans they’d made, all the adventures they wanted to take, all the things they wanted to do. All of the things they were going to do.

  Finally.

  Fucking, finally.

  33

  “How’s Faith?” Jameson asked.

  Holden looked up from the report he was reading and rubbed his eyes.

  “She already knew I was her dad.”

  “How?”

  Just thinking about those bitches made Holden’s skin crawl. White-hot rage took on a whole new meaning when he thought about what they’d done to Charleigh. She’d endured years of their nasty vitriol. As for Faith—they’d hurt his daughter and scared her. Holden had seen a lot, done a lot, been to battle, taken lives, but never had he wanted to commit murder. Now he could think of four people he’d gladly take out. And while the law would frown at him ridding the world of four vile pieces of shit, he would feel no remorse. Each of those four assholes played a role in keeping Faith from him, depriving his child of her father.

  When Holden was done explaining last night’s conversation, Jameson’s face was set to stone. As always, when one of his friends expressed their loyalty, Holden sat back and remembered how lucky he was.

  “Christ. And here I thought Chasin’s mom was the supreme cunt. Seems to me, the bitch has company. Alec filled us in on Edward Axelson. I’ll do my part and make some calls, see what I can dig up. For what it’s worth, I agree with your play. Above all else, they care about their social standing.”

  “Appreciate it. But don’t give it too much time, you have a family to worry about.”

  “And you’re not family?”

  There it was, another reminder.

  “You know what I mean.”

  “Not sure I do. You seem to forget that when something happens to one of us it happens to all of us. That includes our wives and children. Kennedy and the girl posse are circling Charleigh, closing in tight, making sure her and Faith are okay. Whether she wants it or not, she just got six new best friends and became an aunt to a ragtag group of hellions. Not that Faith didn’t already have us, but she’s got five uncles and you got your brothers at your back to help you with her. That’s family, Holden. That’s what we do. It’s what we should’ve done when you left her. We should’ve strapped your ass to a board and tortured your stubborn ass until you told us why you left her. We should’ve beat you senseless when that little girl was about three, looked nothing like that douchebag but she sure as shit looked like you. We all failed you and Charleigh and Faith. That’s never gonna happen again. And I’ll remind you every fucking day what family means until you get it through your thick-ass skull. Do not shut us out. Do not carry the load on your own. Divvy that weight up and let us be there for you like you’re always there for us.”

  It took extreme effort not to allow his gratitude to overwhelm him. He knew he had great friends, he knew all of them were good men, but time and time again, what he failed to remember was they were brothers.

  He stared at Jameson, a man who used to be surly and selfish with his words, a man who elected to grunt more than he spoke, a man who’d lived behind walls and kept to himself, a man who had done an about-face when he met his wife. Not that Jameson was chatty, but he no lo
nger guarded his thoughts. Therefore, Holden opened up.

  “I’m so fucking happy I don’t know what to do.”

  “Live.”

  “Come again?”

  “Just live.” Jameson smiled. “Tell me, how’d you feel when you woke up this morning?”

  Holden didn’t tell his friend he hadn’t actually woken up because he’d never gone to sleep, but he caught his drift and answered, “Unbelievably happy.”

  “Right. And this afternoon you’ll go home and they’ll be there and you’ll be happy. You’ll go to sleep and you’ll do that happy, too. Just fucking live, Holden. No thinking about the past, about shit you cannot control or change. You got it now. Enjoy it. Savor it. Show your girls how much you love them and they’ll wake up, go to sleep, and spend all the moments between knowing they have you so they’ll be happy. It’s time for you to start livin’ again.”

  Jesus, he’s right.

  I hadn’t truly been living for years.

  “It’s good to know you getting laid on the regular has turned you into a wise old man. We needed someone smart around here.”

  “Idiot,” Jameson mumbled and shook his head. “I’ve always been smarter than the rest of you fools. Better-looking, too.”

  “Right.” Holden chuckled. “Good to know you got that big ego of yours in check.”

  “I know you already know this because you had it once, but you seem to have forgotten so I’ll remind you. When you have a beautiful woman at your side who is strong, capable, smart, loyal, and you know you’ve earned her respect, that’s not called ego. That, my friend, is confidence. I know Kennedy wouldn’t be standing next to me with my ring on her finger and my baby in her stomach if I wasn’t worth something. So that confidence is earned. Remember that, Holden. Charleigh Axelson is a warrior, and she wouldn’t have waited for as long as she has for you to pull your head out of your ass if she didn’t think you weren’t worth that wait. You got everything you want, now all you gotta do is live.”

  With that, Jameson turned and left, leaving Holden reeling.

  His friend was right, again. Charleigh was strong, capable, smart, loyal, and a great mom. She wouldn’t accept anything but the best for herself and Faith.