Pleasing Josie (Surrender Book 5)

by Becca Jameson

  Since Josie appears content, I leave her without disrupting her.

  Back in the main room, I easily spot Master Hudson and make my way toward the bench where he’s doing his scene. A woman is draped over the bench. She has short brown hair and appears to be in her forties.

  What shocks me the most is that Master Hudson appears to be younger than me. That’s unexpected. I don’t know why. I was expecting someone older. It’s hard enough for me to visualize submitting to any man, but in my mind, he would have to be about Quinten’s age. This guy is young. Thirty, tops.

  I force myself to stay and watch. What he lacks in age, he makes up for in authority, that’s for sure. He’s got a serious expression when he works, and he circles his submissive deliberately, watching her closely while maintaining contact with her skin.

  The woman is wearing a thong. Her breasts are soft and hanging on both sides of the bench. Her wrists and ankles are secured to the arm and leg rests.

  Master Hudson drags his fingers along her back, making her shudder. Her thighs and butt cheeks are pink, which tells me he’s already used the flogger that rests in his other hand several times.

  I watch his face, his eyes drawn together in concentration as he studies her every reaction. And then his expression softens when he leans down to speak to her, making eye contact.

  She nods and licks her lips before responding to him too softly for me to hear.

  Master Hudson rounds to her backside and lifts the flogger. When the leather strands land on her skin, I flinch. The sub does not. She sighs, sinking into the bench as though his contact with her bottom is relaxing. Maybe it is.

  Who am I kidding? I know it is. I got my first taste of impact play over the weekend. The thought of Master Quinten’s palm on my bare ass makes my cock jump to attention, pissing me off. I hate that he’s affecting me when he’s not only not here but not interested.

  I shake off my frustration and concentrate on the scene. I’ve watched impact play many times in the past. For some reason, I’ve never made it part of my lifestyle, neither receiving nor doling it out. I’m not sure why. Until a few days ago when my world tipped on its axis, I’ve always been more interested in the sensual side of BDSM. Bondage and making sure my submissive comes so hard from edging that she’s unable to think by the time I let her orgasm. It makes me so damn hard when a woman comes under my control.

  I think about Josie. When we met, I knew we were a fantastic match. She enjoyed pleasing me from the start, and I enjoyed making her writhe. We were so in sync. What are we now?

  A sadness creeps over me. Perhaps we’ve simply grown, both in our own ways, but I don’t like it. I wish we could go back to how things were a year ago when we first met and started falling into a pattern that worked for both of us.

  Did it though? I’m no longer certain. I’ve known for months that we had a disconnect. I kept ignoring it because we click so damn well when we do. It’s the in-between times that worried me.

  Master Hudson strikes his submissive’s skin with a rhythmic pattern that mesmerizes everyone watching, including me. Her skin turns a darker pink over time, and she melts farther into the bench. She’s the sort of sub who gets the release she needs from contact. She’s blissed out but not in a sexual way. She’s not writhing against the bench. It’s amazing to watch.

  When the scene is over, Master Hudson helps the sub sit. He offers her water and wraps a blanket around her before leading her to the recovery room.

  I wander around the main floor for another fifteen minutes waiting for them to finish. I consider checking on Josie, but decide against it for now. I know Claudia is keeping an eye on her and hopefully offering her some guidance or dominance.

  A presence at my back has me glancing over my shoulder to find Master Hudson standing very close. I turn to face him as he extends a hand. “You must be Grayson. Master Roman told me about you. How did you like my scene?”

  I shake his hand. His grip is firm. “I enjoyed it. Not as much as the woman I suppose, but…” I joke.

  He smiles. “Well, after all, you weren’t the one getting the release, so I’d hope she enjoyed it more than you. If not, I need to reevaluate my fetish choices.” He makes me feel at ease, and that’s saying something.

  I return the smile, relaxing in his presence.

  He continues speaking, saving me from whatever nonsense I might have vomited out next. “Would you like to be flogged, also?”

  I swallow and pull my shoulders back. It’s hard to ignore the similarities between this conversation with Master Hudson and the first time Master Quinten spoke to me a year ago. My response is nowhere close to the same, however. I’m not in denial anymore. “I’m not sure. Never tried it.”

  “Have you used a flogger on anyone else?”

  “No. I haven’t dabbled much in impact play. My submissive, Josie, she’s…well, I don’t even know how to describe her anymore, but we’ve stuck more to bondage. Shibari is my thing.” I want to be sure he realizes I’m a Dom. I don’t know what Master Roman or Master Julius might have told him.

  “Then maybe you’d like to experience a flogger? If you ever intend to try it out on your sub, you’ll do much better if you’ve felt it yourself.”

  I know this. Same as anything. Hell, I just had my first spanking a few days ago. Now I’m adding flogging? I draw in a deep breath and glance around. It’s not worth pointing out to him that I’ll never be using a flogger myself. I want to experience it, but I only plan to be on the receiving end.

  “I blocked out a private room in case you would prefer not to have an audience tonight.” Damn, he’s understanding.

  I smile at him. “That would be nice. I’m new to switching sides. Still green and a bit nervous.”

  “Totally understandable. Come on.” He nods over his shoulder and I follow him from the main room to a hallway that leads to private rooms.

  I’m glad we aren’t walking past Josie because I’m not sure I could face her right now. I’m overwhelmed with my own issues. And that makes me feel like an ass. What if Josie needs me? What if she hates that I left her by herself in the nursery?

  When we reach the door of one of the rooms, Master Hudson looks at the signup sheet outside and then glances at his watch. “Ten more minutes before it’s our turn.”

  I hesitate for a moment and then lift my gaze. “Do you mind if I check on my submissive? I’ll be right back.”

  “Of course. Take your time.”

  “Thank you.” I’m relieved as I turn and head back down the hallway, aiming for the section of the club where Josie is playing. When I reach the fence, I scan the area, spotting her at a small table in the back. It has two chairs, and Claudia is sitting opposite her. They’re both coloring.

  I’m relieved. Claudia looks relatively out of place next to Josie. She’s wearing a black spandex dress that hugs every curve of her body. She has on black fishnet stockings and black patent leather boots that reach her knees. Her blond hair hangs past her shoulders when it’s down, but it’s up in a high ponytail tonight. Her makeup is perfect and dramatic.

  Neither woman glances my direction as I watch for a few moments. They seem to be involved in a deep discussion, so my anxiety lifts as I turn and head back to the private room.

  When I arrive, the door is open and Master Hudson is inside rummaging through his toy bag.

  I clear my throat and then force myself to utter the most difficult word in the English language at the moment. “Sir.”

  He lifts his gaze and motions me inside. “Hey. Lock the door, please.”

  I step fully into the room, close and lock the door.

  Master Hudson holds up two floggers. “I’m going to make a suggestion. Since you’re new to being on the receiving end of impact, why don’t you keep all your clothes on, relax against the bench, and let yourself experience something new without all the fanfare? I won’t restrain you or anything. Sound good?”

  I pull in a breath, nodding. “Sounds perfect. Ple
ase excuse my nerves.”

  He steps closer, tips my head back with a finger under my chin, and meets my gaze. “No apology needed. I fully understand. I can feel your nerves from across the room.” He lifts a brow. “Is red a good safeword?”

  “Yes, Sir.” God, I’ve never been the one to need a safeword before. I try to consciously remind Josie from time to time that she has it available to her, but we rarely push any hard boundaries enough to warrant needing the reminder. And never once has she used a safeword with me.

  Master Hudson guides me to the bench in the center of the room. I lean over it, settling my knees and forearms on the pads. I close my eyes, reminding myself that this is going better than I could have hoped. Master Hudson is either incredibly intuitive or very informed about me. Probably both.

  “I’ll start easy and work up to a harder strike. I promise I won’t leave lasting marks, which is pretty difficult with denim, anyway. I want you to experience the warm burn but I’d like it to feel relaxing.”

  “Yes, Sir.” I tighten my butt cheeks and then force myself to relax my muscles.

  “You might find it easier if you keep your eyes closed. Go into your head and find a calmness. This is meant to be soothing. I’m not going to strike you for pain right now. I’ll stop every once in a while to make sure you’re doing okay.”

  “Yes, Sir.”

  “Good.” He steps up to my backside and starts swinging the two floggers through the air. I can hear the rhythmic whooshing but he hasn’t struck me yet. When he finally does, it’s only the very tips of the floggers that make contact with my jeans.

  I realize my nerves are unfounded. He is very skilled with the floggers. Not a chance he’s going to injure me. He’s also skilled with his words. So he won’t be injuring me emotionally, either.

  Soon the impact increases as he permits more of the leather strands to make contact. And for a while, I’m held in a suspended state of concentration, absorbing the light blows as he increases the pressure.

  I’m surprised to find myself relaxing more with each passing minute. What they say is right. I can see how a good flogging can relieve stress. It’s like a massage, only centered on my ass and upper thighs.

  Master Hudson eventually stops and rounds to my side. He sets a hand on my back. “How are you doing, Grayson?”

  “Good, Sir.”

  “Excellent. May I continue?”

  “Yes, Sir.” As he rounds back to his position, a thought occurs to me. I’m not aroused. I’m relaxed. Calmer than before. My mind is clearer. But I’m not hard.

  When Master Quinten spanked me, I was so hard I could have hammered nails. Why isn’t that happening tonight? Master Hudson is certainly attractive enough and he’s Dominant enough to put me in my place, but I’m not aroused.

  I stuff that strange realization to the back of my mind and focus on the woosh of the floggers, the rain of the leather against my butt. My skin is reddened beneath my jeans, but not enough to hurt. The results will not linger very long.

  “Would you like to feel a harder sting?” he asks.

  I draw in a breath of courage. “Yes, Sir.” I’m here now. Might as well enjoy the scene.

  The minutes tick by. I’m not sure how long I’ve been lying here as the pressure increases and the burn grows incrementally. Finally, Master Hudson stops. He comes to my side and strokes my cheek. “You did fantastic. How do you feel?”

  I lick my lips. “Peaceful.”

  He smiles. “Good. That’s always a goal.”

  I push myself off the bench, swaying a bit.

  “Hey, there. Slow down.” Master Hudson grabs my biceps. “You slipped a bit into subspace there near the end, I think. You might be unsteady.” He leads me over to a loveseat and helps me sit.

  My butt stings a bit, but not enough to make me wince.

  Master Hudson hands me a water bottle next and then cleans up the space and puts his floggers in his bag. When he’s done, he sits next to me and sets a hand on my shoulder. “I hope you found that enjoyable. You looked peaceful.”

  “I did. Thank you, Sir.” I sip the water and stare at the floor. I’m confused by my reaction to this man.

  “Tell me to bug off if I’m being too personal, but when you’ve submitted in the past, was it sexual for you?”

  I grimace and close my eyes. He can’t see my face. At least, not fully. “Yes,” I whisper. “And my only other experience submitting was recent.” My chest feels tight as I admit this out loud. My experience with Master Quinten was completely different. It was a taste of heaven. I’m not sure I’ll be able to experience anything like that with another Dom. I find myself once again angry with Quinten. This is his fault. It’s been three days since I’ve heard his voice or experienced his touch. I miss him and I hate him for it.

  “Ah, well, that makes sense. I’m going to assume based on what little I know about you that something shook you a bit and now you’re broadening your options.”

  “Sort of. It’s complicated.” And it just got a lot more complicated. I’m not attracted to Master Hudson. Or, perhaps that’s not exactly accurate. He’s attractive. Of that, there is no doubt. But my mind is still wrapped around Master Quinten. I didn’t allow myself to think about him while Master Hudson flogged me, but now that it’s over, flashes of him enter my mind over and over again.

  Shit. I’m a disaster.

  “Don’t let yourself get spooked. If you reacted strongly to another person recently, it would be hard to feel a similar pull to another Dom so soon.”

  I nod. Maybe he’s right. No. I know he’s wrong. He’s just trying to be polite. Either way, I appreciate his words. “Thank you, Sir.”

  “You’re most welcome. Let me know if you ever want to scene again. I’m usually here.”

  I push to standing alongside him. “I appreciate the offer. This was different but…good. I have a lot to think about.”

  He clasps my shoulder briefly. “It happens. We’re all evolving over time. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

  “Thank you.” As I leave the room, I really am calmer than I was earlier. I’m not sure I should be, though. I suspect Master Hudson just has a calming effect on people. Because the truth is that I’m more confused than ever after that experience. My mind seems willing to shove my issues to the backburner for the time being though, so I’ll take it.

  Chapter 28

  Josie

  Even though I arrived at Surrender feeling uneasy, the moment Master Grayson leaves me, I know I’m in my element. I also quickly realize there are two types of littles—the kind who really just want to live at a younger age and don’t see it as something sexual, and the kind who absolutely intend for the night to end in bed with their Master or Daddy.

  It’s not that I didn’t know this before. I did. I’ve done my research. It’s just that tonight is the first time I’ve really paid close attention to the dynamic. Many of the littles I’m surrounded by are tickled pink just to be left to be young with other littles. They love the fact that they can play and toss their worries aside.

  I get the attraction. I do. It’s freeing. But I want more. I want the kind of attention I got from Master Quinten. I want to feel someone’s eyes on me and know that he’s attracted to me sexually. It makes me squirm.

  Granted, I’m concerned because only two people have looked at me like they wanted to fuck me senseless while I was little, and neither of them are in this room. One of them has stepped completely out of my life, and the other one is currently exploring his own fetish. The first I’m so angry with I may never forgive him, the second I’m proud of for confronting his kink.

  This room has other Mommies and Daddies lurking around, but I’m ignoring them. I feel stubborn. It’s too soon. I don’t want a different Daddy. He would never do things like Master Quinten.

  Some of the littles tonight have what I crave. Their Daddy or Mommy is nearby, checking on them often or playing with them. Some of the littles don’t have a Mommy or Daddy at all. T
hey’ve come to the club to either let themselves be who they are or hoping to find a Daddy or Mommy.

  I guess I fit in that last category. Even though my Master is at the club tonight too, he’s not a Daddy, and this fact is making my chest tighten. It’s not that I blame him. I don’t. But I want someone to look at me the way Master Roman looks at Lucy. The way Master Kellen looks at Sabine. I want Master Quinten back so badly I feel like stomping my foot. But he made it clear that it will never happen.

  As I stack some blocks, I think hard about my arrangement. Master Grayson does look at me like I hang the moon. He always has. If anything, he’s even more attracted to this new me than the old me. He stares, in fact. Mesmerized and obviously aroused. But there’s a disconnect at the same time.

  A long sigh escapes my lips just as a shadow falls over me. When I glance up, I find Mistress Claudia smiling at me. Her outfit takes my breath away as it always does. Black from head to toe. She’s a formidable Domme.

  Right now, she’s got a softer expression on her face and she reaches for my hand. “Want to come sit with me for a while?”

  I nod and set my fingers in hers. My nails are blunt and unpolished. Hers are manicured and perfect. She’s got a strong grip as she pulls me to my feet.

  We cross the room and find a small table. Mistress Claudia pulls out a chair for me and I sit in it while she takes the one across from me. There are crayons and coloring books on the table and she pushes one toward me. “I thought we might talk. We can color at the same time.”

  I have trouble picturing this Mistress coloring, but she doesn’t hesitate. I know everyone who’s helping Master Grayson and me has spoken to Mistress Claudia about talking to me, so I’m not shocked. “Have you ever had a little?” I ask her.

  She nods. “Nothing long-term, but yes. I’ve played the role of Mommy before. I’ve dabbled in just about every aspect of the fetish community. What I’ve learned over the years is that I’m pretty flexible and can handle the needs of just about any submissive. The only role I can’t fill is as the submissive myself.” She smiles.