A Christmas Duet : Two Contemporary Tales of Holiday Romance

by Amy Lamont

  "What are you talking about?"

  "I'm talking about the way you've been throwing yourself at Father Michael. Honestly Faith, it's downright embarrassing."

  Faith's heart hurt at her sister's words. Her eyes sought Michael out. From across the room his tall form and broad shoulders made him easy to pick out of the crowd. He was smiling down at an elderly couple as the woman chatted animatedly.

  "How is it embarrassing? I'm talking to Michael about the service we just did together." Faith tried to play it off as no big deal. If Maddie had an inkling about the depths of Faith's feelings for the priest, she might really go off on Faith. "It's no big deal."

  "Oh, please. I see the way you've been looking at him. It's obvious you have feelings for him."

  "So what if I do?" Faith's teeth clenched as she tried to hold onto her temper. "I don't know why it's any of your business."

  "Hey, I'm just trying to keep you from making a fool of yourself." Maddie's tone changed to conciliatory as if she had been trying to be a good big sister all along. "I mean, can you really see yourself with Father Michael?"

  "I hadn't really thought about it," Faith said tiredly. This was not a conversation she wanted to have with Maddie, and she had already admitted too much.

  "Faith, he's a priest, for heaven's sake. You're a musician. You haven't ever held down a real job. Father Michael has an important position as head of this church. He has to put his reputation before any feelings he might have for some...well, some musician."

  Faith looked down at her feet expecting to see a pool of blood from the cut her sister just made. Guess this wound only showed on the inside. Maddie's words reflected all of the doubts Faith had over the last few days. She'd always been a screw-up. A man like Michael needed someone he could be proud to have by his side. He wouldn't think of her in a romantic way. Thinking of the way she'd acted toward him, probably making cow eyes like a lovesick twelve-year-old had her face burning with embarrassment.

  The only thing holding her together was the determination not to give her sister the satisfaction of knowing she'd made a direct hit.

  "I don't know why you'd think I was chasing after Michael, Maddie. Do you remember my last few boyfriends—tattoos, motorcycles, artists—any of that ring a bell?" Her voice dripped sarcasm in the hopes Maddie would believe her final words, "Like I'd ever be interested in a priest."

  As the words left her lips, Maddie gave her a triumphant smile. Something was not right here. When Faith looked around she realized Michael had come up behind her and heard her last words loud and clear.

  Chapter 8

  Tuesday night Faith stood at the microphone, a guitar held in front of her. She looked out at the sparse weeknight crowd at the bar. She'd played here before. Too many times to count. The customers rocking the barstools were regulars who barely looked up from their beers as she played one of the songs she'd played at church Saturday evening.

  It took great strength not to stop playing and sigh into the microphone. Her hands played over the guitar strings, picking out the melody without thought. Her last words before leaving the church the other night had been ringing in her ears for days. And the look on Michael's face.

  He'd been hurt. Whether it was just because her words were hurtful or because he'd actually had some feelings for her, she didn't know. And she hadn't stuck around to find out either. As he stood there frozen, she allowed her mortification to propel her from the church. She didn't even stop to get her coat. Just started running and didn't stop until she arrived at her apartment.

  Faith was grateful she didn't carry a purse and instead had her house keys in her front pants pocket. She might have just sat on her front stoop and froze to death otherwise. Cause there was no way she was going back to that church. Ever.

  She got to the end of the song and there was a smattering of applause from the few who noticed she finished. She was supposed to play a couple more songs this set, but she was done. She leaned her guitar against the wall and dropped heavily onto a barstool.

  "What's up, Faith?"

  Faith managed to give the bartender a halfhearted smile. "Not too much, Sam. My heart just doesn't seem to be in it tonight."

  Truer words were never spoken. She'd already come to the conclusion during mass on Saturday that some spark had been missing for a while as she played her music in bars around town. The thrill of feeling that excitement during the church service had been a reminder of why she had wanted to be a musician in the first place.

  Now, here she was again, sitting on a barstool in a bar that had seen its best days decades ago. When she played here before, she hadn't been able to put her finger on exactly what was wrong. Saturday night reminded her of the fire she used to feel when she got up on stage.

  Now that she knew what was missing, it was tough to go back to business as usual. She wanted the fire back.

  "I figured we might be seeing the last of you soon," Sam said now.

  Faith wrinkled her forehead. "What do you mean?"

  "Could just tell things weren't the same for you as they used to be. Playing seems like more of a habit."

  Wow. Sam hit the nail on the head. Who knew it was so obvious? Maybe Michael had seen this in her and had simply offered the gig at the church to be kind. Maybe he was never interested in her. Maybe she took his overtures of friendship and kindness the wrong way.

  But that didn't explain the hurt on his face when she'd dropped her bombshell Saturday night. There had to be more than simple kindness from the neighborhood priest involved.

  With a sigh, Faith slid off the barstool. "You know what? I think you're right, Sam. I think I have some things to figure out. I'm going to call it a night."

  The night was cold and crisp and clear. Faith shivered a little in her thermal sweatshirt, the warmest article of clothing she could find in her closet since she left her coat at church. She walked home anyway, her guitar case swinging at her side and the twinkling of Christmas decorations in shop windows lighting her way.

  Faith thought the huddled figure on her doorstep was one of the homeless women in the neighborhood until she got close to her apartment building.

  "Mom?"

  "Faith. Thank goodness. I thought I might freeze to death before you got home. Honestly, I don't know how you keep these kind of hours."

  Faith stifled a laugh. She'd left the gig early and it wasn't one that normally ran very late anyway. It couldn't be later than 9:30 now. What she couldn't figure out was why her mother would darken her doorstep. Mrs. Leary thought Faith's choice to live in this particular neighborhood was just one more sign of Faith’s rebelliousness.

  "I brought your coat." She held out Faith's black wool coat.

  "Thanks," Faith said, taking it. "Mom, you could have just called me. I would have come to get it."

  "I tried calling you. More than once. And the coat isn't the only reason I came over."

  Faith cringed, feeling a little guilty. She had a tendency to avoid her mother's phone calls in the best of times. Since the whole Father Michael Debacle, as she'd come to think of it, Faith had unplugged her phone and left her cell phone buried under a pile of socks in her drawer.

  "Aren't you going to invite me up?"

  "Of course." Faith mentally reviewed the state of the apartment. While not a total slob, her housekeeping skills probably weren't up to her mother's standards. Oh, well. Not much she could do about the sweater laying on the dining room chair or the layer of dust on her entertainment center at the moment. She'd just have to suck up the comments her mother was sure to make.

  "About what happened at the church Saturday night," Mrs. Leary started the second the door closed behind them.

  Faith's whole body tensed, waiting for the crushing set down she was sure her mother was about to rain upon her.

  "Faith, I don't understand what happened. I tried to ask Maddie and all she would say is that the two of you were chatting and she told you she thought Father Michael might be interested in her. And then
you made some disparaging remarks questioning why anyone would want to date a priest."

  Faith's jaw worked as she held onto her temper by a thread. Leave it to Maddie to twist things to suit her. "That's not exactly what happened."

  "Then why don't you make us some tea and you can explain your side of things?"

  Okay. What? Not once in all her years of being this woman's daughter could she remember her taking Faith's side over Maddie's. Or even wanting to hear Faith's side of things.

  Ten minutes later the two women were sitting in front of steaming cups of tea at Faith’s tiny kitchen table. Faith had puttered for as long as she could, hoping to put her mother off her trail.

  But to no avail. As soon as they were seated, Mrs. Leary instructed her, “Now, start from the beginning.”

  And Faith did. “I guess it started at your house on Thanksgiving. Well, no, that’s not true. It started the day before.” Faith told her mother about the grocery store, the misunderstanding about the kind of priest Michael was, the chemistry between them, her feelings about her music, and Maddie’s interference in the relationship. Over the next half an hour, Faith said more to her mother than she had in all her teen years combined.

  When she was done, only one thing was left. The question that had been plaguing Faith for the last few years. “Mom, why does Maddie hate me so much? We got along for the most part as kids, but lately…I don’t know. It seems like she can’t stand me.”

  Mrs. Leary patted Faith’s hand. “She’s jealous of you.”

  Faith laughed out loud. “That’s ridiculous. I’m the screw-up, the one who can’t cook, doesn’t have a real job. Maddie is perfect. Why on earth would she be jealous of me?”

  “You do exactly as you please. You always have. Maddie did everything she thought she was supposed to—went to college, got a job, spends a fortune on clothes and manicures, learned to make homemade meals from scratch.”

  Faith nodded. This was more along the lines of what she expected from her mother—a list of things that Maddie was more accomplished at than she herself was.

  “Don’t get me wrong, Faith. You caused more than a few of the gray hairs I pay good money to get covered up. But I never worried about you being happy because you always decided what you wanted and went after it with gusto no matter what anyone else thought you should do.”

  Faith’s jaw dropped. That sounded almost complimentary.

  “Maddie did what was expected of her. And now she’s twenty-eight, and doing what she thought she was supposed to hasn’t helped her meet the man of her dreams or keep her from feeling a little stuck in her job.”

  Faith sat back in her seat. This couldn’t be true. “But Maddie always seems so together. I’m such a mess. From one month to the next I don’t know if I’ll be able to cover my rent or pay my bills. A husband isn’t even on my radar.”

  Well, at least up until a few days ago. Not that she was ready to share that with her mother. But since meeting Michael, she started having visions of wedding dresses and maternity clothes. Heck, if she were telling the truth, her ovaries stood up and did a mating dance when their hands first touched in the sudsy water in a sink full of Thanksgiving dishes.

  “That’s the thing Faith. You may feel like your life is a mess, but you’re not afraid of letting things get messy in order to follow your heart. I think Maddie wishes she could be more like you.”

  “Yeah, right. Cause I’m such a role model.” Faith couldn’t help the sarcasm. She always felt like a second-class citizen in her sister’s shadow. Maddie would never wish to be more like her.

  “Don’t sell yourself short.” Mrs. Leary stood up and kissed the top of Faith’s head, smoothing down a few of the shaggy blonde locks. “Don’t forget, you do always manage to pay your bills and your rent. And I’ve never seen you not get something you’ve gone after.”

  Faith shook her head. She must be hallucinating. That was the only explanation.

  “And, for the record, after Maddie fed me that bunch of malarkey about Father Michael being interested in her, I got the truth out of her. She wanted me to apologize to you. She just saw him as one more thing that would come to you easily, and it made her angry enough to get in the way.”

  Mrs. Leary moved toward the door, sliding into her coat as she went. Obviously, their little chat was over. That’s okay. If they talked much more her mother might reveal even more startling news. Like where Hoffa was buried.

  “Mom, let me come get you a cab.”

  “That won’t be necessary, dear. Mr. Wilkinson dropped me off and told me he’d be back promptly at 10:30 to get me.”

  “Mr. Wilkinson?”

  “Yes, a nice gentleman I met over at your Michael’s church.”

  Faith blinked. She wouldn’t be surprised if her head started spinning on her shoulders. In the last ten minutes, her mother had completely revised the way Faith saw her relationship to her sister, and now her mother, the woman who had been setting a place at the table for her dead husband for close to two decades, was accepting a ride from a “nice gentleman.”

  “I may need to take up drinking,” Faith said to the empty room as she sagged against her front door.

  After her mother left, Faith went to bed. She tossed and turned for a few hours, but sleep failed to claim her. Her mother’s words kept playing over in her head. She did have a mind of her own. She didn’t let people steer her off course when she set her mind on something. Until recently.

  Saturday night made it abundantly clear her music had fallen flat lately. And her reaction to her sister’s taunting—spouting out a lie and then turning tail and running. Faith barely recognized the woman who had done those things.

  As sunlight began to peek through the sheer white curtains of her bedroom and the din of birds outside became loud enough to wake the dead, Faith came to a conclusion.

  She was an idiot.

  She’d let her own doubts about being right for Michael get in the way of what could be something fabulous. And it could be fabulous. She felt it from the very first time she met him. He was perfect for her.

  And if she pursued things, what’s the worst that could happen? It could fabulously crash and burn. But she’d never let fear defeat her before. And look at what she could end up with if she followed her heart with gusto, as her mother put it.

  Michael’s face swam before her. And for the first time since she uttered the most stupid sentence of her life Saturday evening, a feeling of warmth and hope and excitement filled Faith.

  The thing that sucked most about making life-altering decisions at five in the morning was the long wait until the rest of the world was awake and on the same page. And if the wait wasn’t bad enough, the confusion could kill you.

  After giving up on sleep and climbing out of bed, Faith paced her shoebox-sized apartment waiting until it was late enough to go see Michael. Punchy from the lack of sleep, she was up for two hours before it occurred to her she had no idea where to find him. Would he be at the church every day? Did he have a home nearby?

  She spent the next hour showering and getting ready for the day and formulating a plan. He’d have to show up at the church at some point. She would camp out on the church steps until he arrived.

  With this in mind, she bundled up for the chilly morning and stopped for a couple of steamy cups of coffee on her way. At best, she’d have fresh hot coffee to offer Michael as a peace offering. At worst, she’d be a jittery, over-caffeinated mess who sputtered incoherently until Michael called the police to have her removed.

  Well, if she got arrested, she’d call Maddie to bail her out. Her sister owed her one.

  Faith sat down on the concrete steps and began her vigil. She admired the greenery now adorning the front of the old stone church. The nativity scene placed on the small patch of winter-darkened grass made her think of the story Michael told her on Thanksgiving. She double-checked to make sure baby Jesus was exactly where he should be.

  After a few minutes, she wrapped her h
ands carefully around her cup to absorb optimum warmth. The coffee wasn’t enough to ward off the cold, though, and it wasn’t long before the wintery chill began to seep through her layers of clothes. After about half an hour and both cups of coffee, she started to think she might need to come up with a new plan.

  Just as she rose from the steps, she noticed a woman walking briskly toward her. In her fifties, with a no-nonsense air about her, the woman walked right up to Faith.

  “Dear, if you’re waiting out here for the soup kitchen, I’m afraid that’s only on weekends. I can direct you to the shelter down the street.”

  “Oh, no, I’m not. I mean, I’m not homeless or…well, hungry,” Faith spluttered. She gave her head a shake and started again. “I’m Faith Leary. I was hoping to get to see Father Michael.”

  “Why are you sitting out here? Father Michael has probably been at work for a few hours.” The woman strode up the steps, gesturing for Faith to follow.

  Faith rolled her eyes, annoyed at her own stupidity. It hadn’t even occurred to her to try the front door and see if anyone was around.

  Before Faith could say a word, she’d been led into the rectory and the woman was calling out. “Father Michael! There’s someone here to see you.”

  And then he was there, standing in front of her.

  “Faith.” He eyed her cautiously.

  “Hi.” She couldn’t take her eyes off him. It seemed like much longer than four days since she’d last seen him.

  “Was there something you needed to discuss with Father Michael, dear?” The brisk voice broke the staring contest.

  “Faith, I don’t think you’ve met Helen yet. She’s the church secretary. We’d never get anything done without her.” Michael’s polite tone made Faith long for the warmth he’d always shown her before. “Helen was away visiting family this weekend. Helen, Faith volunteered at the soup kitchen this weekend and filled in for Chris at mass on Saturday.”

  “Mmmhmm.” Helen’s noncommittal sound along with the way her eyes darted between the other two made it clear she knew something more was going on here. “Why don’t you two step into Father Michael’s office for your discussion?”