by Z Brewer
Wanting more than anything to ask whom he’d captured and imprisoned, I bit my tongue and remained calm. “Is that a threat?”
“It’s more of an expression of concern. For your happiness, of course.”
My throat felt dry. I swallowed hard in an effort to coax moisture into it. “What friend? Who do you have downstairs?”
“A man. Well…a boy, really.” A small smile touched the corners of his mouth, but quickly melted away. “Would you like to see him?”
“Yes.”
“Eat first. Then I’ll take you to him.” He untied my ankles, then my wrists. As the silken ropes fell away, I had to fight the urge to run. Whoever he had downstairs—Trayton, maybe?—I had to get to them, and fast.
Despite the rumbling in my stomach, I didn’t want to eat. It would be like giving in to Gage somehow, handing over control of myself to him. Who was this man? This King Darrek, the Graplar King? He was certainly not the boy that I had taught how to fish and rescued from the river. He was not the boy who’d helped me retain my katana and ate fudge pods with me. This person was someone else entirely—the kind of person who killed without regrets and bludgeoned someone when they weren’t looking before binding her to his lavish bed.
But my stomach was rumbling and aching from hunger. My body felt weak. Like it or not, I needed to eat something if I was going to dare an escape from Darrek’s stronghold at some point.
Before reaching for food, I gently touched the back of my head. The wound had been carefully cleaned, but I could still feel the stitches. Whatever he’d hit me with, it had been large and heavy, enough to knock me out of the world for a little while. After examining it, I snatched a warm roll from the tray beside the bed and bit into it. The outer layer was delightfully crisp, and inside was soft and warm. After devouring the bread, I grabbed a large cut of cheese and ate in in a hurry. The food, though simple, tasted divine. As I ate on bits of meat and fruit, Gage stood near the foot end of the bed, the expression of his face a blend of relief and sorrow. Maybe he was happy that I was eating and not trying to bash him over the head with the tray. I didn’t know where the sorrow was coming from, and I didn’t dare ask. I drank the warm tea down and sat the empty mug on the tray. He took a step toward me, and try as I might, I couldn’t help but twitch a little bit. I didn’t want him anywhere near me.
“Kaya, I want to explain something to you. I realize you don’t want to hear anything that I have to say. But I have to say it, and I hope that you will try to put aside what Skilled society has taught you and listen to what I am telling you now. You don’t have to believe me. Just please consider the possibility that I am telling the truth.” He gestured to a spot on the bed beside where I lay. “May I sit?”
Through a mouthful of cheese, I said, “It’s your castle, highness.”
He lowered himself slowly onto the bed beside me. I instantly slid away from him. He didn’t look surprised. “Years ago—a lifetime ago, it seems—I attended Darkmoon Academy as a young Barron. I was a talented alchemy student and an excellent swordsman, and no one had more pride in being a Barron than I did. It was a golden age. A time of peace and calm in Skilled Society. Yes, there were Graplars, and yes, they frequently attacked and killed, but they were animals. An animal cannot be expected to behave as people do. So we went on daily patrols and made certain they stayed a healthy distance from the school and life went on pretty much unheeded.”
As he spoke, he seemed to be transported back in time. It was a challenge for me to imagine a time when Tril wasn’t war ravaged.
“When I was sixteen, a girl by the name of Elaina was brought to Darkmoon from Shadow Academy. We were introduced and that night, as I was undressing for bed, I noticed that my Trace had turned crimson. It turned out that she was my Soulbound Healer. The Headmaster knew of course. But it was sort of a surprise for both of us. A joyous one. I came to love Elaina deeply in the coming months. She wasn’t like any other Healer I had ever known. She was skilled with a sword, having taught herself in secrecy. When I discovered her secret, I took her under my wing. We practiced together over the next year, which only strengthened our bond. I loved her. I cannot imagine loving anyone the way I loved Elaina.” His expression lit up as her name crossed his lips. I thought of my secret training sessions with Darius…and how I would never see him again. My heart crashed to the bottom of my stomach in sorrow.
“But as deeply as Elaina seemed to love me, she began spending a tremendous amount of time with another man—a Healer by the name of Cortrain.” His lip twitched when he said the man’s name. “The night she came to me to confess their entanglement, she told me that she was pregnant.”
Wherever Gage was, he was no longer in these chambers with me. He was back in time, hurting and raging and howling in pain at the thought of another person intruding on his love. I swallowed hard and dared a question. “Who was the father?”
“I didn’t know. In a heated rage, I assumed Cortrain had fathered the child. I left her there in my room, sobbing into her hands. I found Cortrain in the courtyard, and all but split him in two with my katana. By the time Elaina caught up to me, I was on my knees in a pool of his blood, overwhelmed by sorrow. I was convinced the child had to be his. And I could not stop myself from exacting my terrible vengeance. The guards took me away. I never saw Elaina again, though every day I waited for her to come. Then, about seven months later, as I sat alone in my prison cell, the Headmaster came to tell me something that changed my life forever. The child had been born. A boy. And my mirror image. My son. I’d killed Cortrain in a jealous rage, when it turned out that all they had physically done was kiss. Once. I was the father. And I would never see my son.” Tears streamed freely down his face, and the friend that had known Gage had to resist reaching out and comforting King Darrek. He’d killed a man in cold blood, purely out of jealousy and speculation. Elaina had made a mistake, and Cortrain had paid for that kiss with his life.
“I broke free of my prison and travelled to Wood’s Cross, the last known home of the motherstone that I had studied the history of quite thoroughly in my alchemy classes. We’d learned that it would grant the wearer long life. I thought maybe, if I wore an amulet made from it and gifted a similar amulet to my son, and to Elaina, perhaps we would live long enough for her to forgive me.” He wiped his tears away with his hands, and I wondered how many people had been privy to this tale—how many knew the man behind the madness. He said, “I won’t go into the bloodshed to acquire the motherstone. But I will say that my return to Darkmoon was fruitless. Word of my actions at Wood’s Cross had reached Okumatte and she fled with our son. I searched for years, but eventually learned that Elaina had died from the natural aging process—something the amulet I wore, still wear, protected me from. I searched all of Tril for our son, but only caught rumors and bits of information as time went on. He was a Barron, it turned out. He raised a family with a gifted Healer, and gave me grandchildren. They went on to give me great grandchildren. I never saw them. I was alone, without family. And in my heartbroken bitterness, I amassed an army and learned to control the Graplars with my amulet. I wanted vengeance against Skilled society. I wanted something that I could not have—my dear, departed Elaina. The Graplars became my only friends, my only family. Years passed. Then decades. And before I knew it, a century stood between me and the last day I had seen my sweet Elaina.”
Words left my mouth in a whisper. “You could have chosen a different path. One not so littered with dead bodies and pain.”
He didn’t look proud of the fact that all that death and pain had been his doing. He didn’t even look justified. He merely looked drained and tired…so very tired.
“I suppose I could have. But in my bitterness—and the bitterness of the Zettai council—a war began. And one day that war took me back to Wood’s Cross. I was fighting this young Barron. He was so talented, such a gift to Barron kind, but oh, how I looked forward to striking him down. Then our eyes met. And in his I saw my sweet Elaina. To
my shock, I was looking into the eyes of my great-great grandson. I let him live that day. And every day since I have plotted a way to repair what is broken between us, to right the wrong I did to Cortrain that day in the courtyard.” He took in a shallow, shaking breath and released it slowly. “And now Darius is dead.”
“Darius.” No. It couldn’t be. He couldn’t mean—
“Yes.” He was looking at me, waiting for the puzzle pieces of logic to line up just right.
My heart ached when I realized what he was saying. “Darius is your grandson.”
“That he was. Until today. He was the last. My bloodline ended with him.” Once again, it wasn’t the Graplar King in front of me, but Gage. Sweet, sad Gage. All alone in this world. A world his fury had managed to create.
A mixing of horror and pain filled me. Had Darius known? Of course not. He couldn’t have. For a moment I was glad that he’d died before learning the news. “Why didn’t you have other children, with another woman? You could have moved on, had a life, loved again. Had a family…”
“Because I never loved anyone but Elaina. I couldn’t imagine being intimate with someone that way. Not without truly loving them.” He stretched out his left hand and ran a lock of my hair slowly, gently through his fingers. “You remind me of Elaina in so many ways, Kaya.”
I pulled away from him. “But I’m not her.”
“No. But I could love you, I think. Given time. I could give you an incredible life. If you asked, I would end the war, free my slaves, calm my Graplars. I would destroy my amulet, forsake eternity, live a mortal life. I would tilt all of Tril on its axis at your beckon. I could love you. We could have a life together. Raise children. All you need is to give me your word that you will stay with me. Just one word. Say it, and all that I can provide is yours.” I searched his eyes for a lie, but found none. There was no madness there either, only reason. He truly believed that he could have a second chance at life and love with his dear Elaina by bending to my every will in penance.
I shook my head, horrified. “No.”
“No?” He blinked, as if the word felt strange and unfamiliar on his tongue.
I slid across the bed to the opposite side. As I stood, I made certain the large bed remained between us and that my word remained firm. “No.”
He shook his head. “I offer her peace. I offer her her every dream. And yet she refuses. Why?”
“Because I don’t love you, Darrek. I don’t love you, Gage. I love someone else.” I moved slowly toward the door, careful not to hurry my steps and jar him. Somehow I had to get out of this room. “It’s taken me a long time to see who I want at my side more than anyone else, and the answer has been clear from the beginning. And that person is most certainly not you.”
He stood, making his approach to me with a firm step. Fire lit up his eyes. I wondered if those glowing embers had been the last thing that Cortrain had seen. “Who is it then? Who do you profess to love so dearly? Is it the boy in my dungeon? The one with black hair in a stolen uniform? His blood will be spilled by morning.”
Trayton. Trayton was in the dungeon. Had he come here to rescue me? Even though we were no longer Bound? I shook my head at my captor as I crept ever closer to the door. A few more inches and I could reach the lock. Then what? Run. Run for my life. Or until my life was taken from me.
I looked him in the eye, my heart hardening. “It’s too late for you to kill the man I love, Gage. I love Darius.”
He looked stunned as he shook his head, his bottom lip quivering. “But Darius is dead.”
“And I will live out the rest of my days loving him still.” I shot my hand forward and unlocked the door, whipping it open before I dashed into the hall.
Behind me, Darrek cried out, “You won’t have days!”
To my surprise, no guards were posted outside the room where I’d been held captive. As I rounded the corner at the end of the hall, I dared a glance back. Darrek had a dagger in his hand and a wild look in his eye. Once again, I wondered where he was—here in his castle with me, or back in the courtyard with Cortrain. He moved so quickly that his Barron stride overtook mine in no time. Before I could gasp, he grabbed me by the throat with his free hand. Forcing me back against the stone wall, he raised the dagger and screamed, “You will not leave me yet again, Elaina!”
The air was leaving me, my head growing dizzy. I reached out and ripped the amulet from his neck. As I smashed it against the stones behind me, it shattered, and shock filled Gage’s eyes. He stepped back, dropping the dagger, his chest rising and falling in confused terror and fury. Without any more thought or care than he had given Cortrain, I flung myself on the ground, retrieving the dagger. Regaining his senses, he reached for me, but I kicked him hard in the chest—so hard that he hit the opposite, tapestry-covered wall. I thought about the look on Darius face as he fell dead away, and the way that I had felt when I’d held his bleeding head in my lap. I thought about how beautiful he’d been the moment I met him and how I relished every challenge he’d thrown my way. And then I thought about how King Darrek had stolen all of that away from me forever. From us.
I thrust the blade forward, into Darrek’s chest. Pulling it out, I stabbed him again and again. As he slid down the wall, his life ebbing from him, his eyes fogged. I thought I heard him say Elaina’s name in his final moments, but I couldn’t be certain.
I knelt in a pool of his blood, weeping, stabbing his corpse again and again, needing to know that the Graplar King was dead at last.
And then a firm, gentle hand closed over my wrist, stopping my violent act. Whoever it was removed the dagger with their other hand and then helped me to stand. Through my tears, I slowly lifted my eyes to look at whoever had found me in the midst of such a horrible deed.
When I saw his silver hair, I didn’t think. I didn’t speak. I merely flung myself into his arms. Darius pulled away slightly, but as my heart began to crash, he pressed his lips to mine so firmly, so tenderly, as if the only thing on Tril that he wanted to do was to go on kissing me forever.
No words were needed to understand. We loved one another. Deeply. Truly. Somehow, my dying had not broken our bond. Somehow, my light touch in his final moments had saved his life. We were Soulbound, but even if we hadn’t been, I knew that we would have found one another anyway. There was no better match for me than Darius, and no better match for him than me.
Our lips parted at last and Darius brushed my hair from my eyes. He said, “From the moment I first saw you, I’ve wanted to kiss you, to hold you close to me, Kaya. But even after having done that, there remains one thing that I’ve wanted to do so much more.”
“What’s that?”
“To tell you this.” He in took a shaking, nervous breath and said, “I love you. I’ve fought my feelings and wanted it to be so much more than some blood bond between us. And I realize that it is now. You’re one fak of a warrior, a sharp mind, and so beautiful—even with blood splatters on your face. No…especially with them. I love you. But I won’t presume that you feel the same. If you don’t, I understand. I just want your happiness. No matter what the cost.”
I reached up and touched his silver hair, unintentionally staining part of it with Gage’s blood. When I spoke, it was in whispers, my throat still store from when Gage had choked me. “Just love me. Love me forever. It’s the only thing that will truly make me happy, Darius. Because I love you.”
This time when we kissed, my heart soared higher than it ever had before. I loved Darius. He loved me. And despite the fact that we still had to free Trayton and make our way home again, all was right with the world.
Prologue
Ten Years Later
Darius could have remained a teacher at Shadow Academy, which he had for several years after Darrek’s demise. But once I had completed my training—both as a Healer and a Barron, something that the Zettai council changed for all students in a show of appreciation for my murder of the Graplar King—the couple devoted much of our life to peacek
eeping missions across all of Tril. Those ten years flew by, and soon, we chose a cabin just upriver from my parent’s home just outside of Kessler. Our time of travel had come to a quiet close for the moment, as a new adventure was beginning for us.
My belly was so swollen that my mother was convinced that I was carrying twins. All I knew was that my ankles were swollen and I was so tired that I hoped every day would bring me closer to giving birth. I sat in the rocking chair beside the front window, listening to the rush of the river outside. Even with Darius’s stealth, I could hear his approach. I’d been simultaneously anticipating his return and dreading it. The news had not been easy to hear. My husband’s confirmation of it would be almost unbearable.
The door swung open and in stepped Darius, his eyes still red from mournful tears. When I looked at him, I burst into tears as well. “So it’s true?”
He closed the door and moved closer to me, taking my chin in his hand and holding my gaze. “I’m afraid so.”
I buried my face in Darius’s stomach and let the tears come, soaking his shirt. He held me close, his tears dripping from his eyes to my hair. It was the most challenging thing we had faced together since before the death of King Darrek.
I wiped my eyes and pulled away slightly. “How?”
Darius knelt beside me, his hand finding my pregnant belly naturally. “He was defending a group of Unskilled children from a Graplar. They got to safety. Trayton didn’t.”
My heart was broken. Trayton—Darius’s best friend, such an incredible friend to us both in the years since our bond was broken—was dead. He’d died a hero, which was the only way that a man like Trayton could die.
Darius placed a kiss on my belly. Our baby shifted in response, as if saying hello. When my husband met my eyes, he said, “Maddox is here. She’s waiting outside. I told her to give me time to see if you were up to visitors.”