Incomplete

by L. A. Fiore

  “Mom, are you okay?” Ashley asked. “You haven’t eaten anything.”

  Luke looked up from his phone, studying her from across the table. She couldn’t look at him, not when she was thinking all that she was. Her focus shifted to Ashley, before moving to Justin. She knew what she was doing would impact them. They would feel the repercussions if she got caught. She did feel guilty for that, but then she was always telling them to go for what they wanted. It could be argued what she wanted she shouldn’t want, but she did. She wanted Gage so badly she was willing to take the risk of breaking up her family, though she acknowledged she had been holding her family together, continuing in a marriage that hadn’t been much of one for a very long time. “I’m just tired.”

  “You should go to the spa. Treat yourself.” Ashley suggested, growing more animated when she looked over at her dad. “Laney’s mom went last weekend. She said she felt like a new woman.”

  They were all thinking about her freak out. Tilly didn’t like losing her cool, hated that part of what fueled that scene was missing Gage, but her family, at times, expected too much of her. Guilt twisted in her gut, hating herself a little for jumping on her daughter’s suggestion as her means to get away...to cheat, but that was exactly what she needed. “That’s a great idea. I’m going to take the weekend.”

  “What weekend?” Luke asked.

  “This weekend.”

  Luke’s brows rose. “You’ve never been to a spa.”

  “Not the spa. I think I’ll spend the weekend in the city. I’ve been wanting to go, a weekend away to recharge.” She couldn’t believe how easily the lie slipped off her tongue. She felt guilty lying, but not as guilty as she should.

  Ashley chimed in. “That’s a great idea, Mom.”

  Justin added, “You definitely should go.”

  Her heart twisted. She didn’t like pulling her children into her deception.

  Luke put his phone down. “And what about the kids?”

  Tilly was about to say he could stay home with them, hell, take them somewhere. What a novel idea, but Justin beat her to it when he said, “We’re old enough to be on our own.”

  “That’s not the point,” Luke said sternly.

  Tilly put her fork down and linked her fingers on her lap, trying to control her temper. “And what is the point, Luke?”

  “You have a responsibility here.”

  “So do you, but you’ve been slacking on them for years.” She shot back, then felt badly doing this in front of the kids. “If you’re done, you can take your dessert into the family room.”

  Ashley and Justin didn’t hesitate, jumping up from the table. They understood the undercurrent and were getting out of Dodge. She waited to hear the television before she continued, “I’ve never taken time for myself. I don’t go out with the girls, I don’t go on vacations, I don’t get my hair done every six weeks or my nails done every week. I give everything to this family, so I am taking a weekend for myself.”

  “Why?”

  Tilly bit her tongue, didn’t share what was really going on in her head. Didn’t say she wanted a weekend to spend it with a man who wanted to be with her. That she was so tired of a husband who was never around and when he was, he only found fault...reminding her of all the areas he found her lacking.

  “Because I ask for nothing, but I need some time for me.”

  Luke sat back in his chair. “We’ll schedule a weekend, and I’ll take you.”

  Her body went numb at the thought, but she kept her voice even. “I’ve wanted you to take me into the city for years and you never have. Besides, you coming with me defeats the whole point. Me time. Not us time.”

  “And what are we supposed to do while you’re gone?”

  Tilly stood and reached for her plate. Her hands shook but not from nerves. Excitement. She stood, looking her husband in the eyes while her body warmed thinking about another man. That made her a terrible person, but she was a terrible person who intended on making the weekend worth the guilt she’d feel later. “The fact that you have to ask that should be a flag, Luke.” She started from the room and couldn’t stop the smile that Luke couldn’t see. “I’ll let you know my plans when I’ve made them.”

  _______________

  After dropping the kids off for their after-school activities, Tilly went to the mall. She bought a few things, well, only bras and panties. In the dressing room, as she tried them on, she studied herself in the mirror and even with the want and excitement burning through her, insecurity was there, too, that Gage would see her, all of her. She tried not to focus on the flaws, but she lingered on the stretch marks that marred her stomach and thighs. Her stomach that was fuller than it should be, even with her constant dieting. Her breasts weren’t the perky breasts they once were. She studied her reflection. What was she doing? She looked away, taking off the bra and dropping it on the chair. Reaching for her own. She didn’t even hesitate to jump at the opportunity of being with Gage, but the reality was different. She was a mother of two, her body showing the evidence of that. Her sex life had never been great, no, that wasn’t true. In the beginning, it had been amazing, but it had been so long since she and Luke had been intimate...was part of that her fault? She dropped down on the chair, bending in half as her stomach twisted in knots. Could she really do this? She wanted to, she wanted so much to see what it could be like, but was she really the kind of woman who could share something so intimate with another man...despite what she felt for him? She almost texted him. She almost called it off, but then she remembered their day at the park. The way he looked at her with her hair plastered to her head, her makeup running, but all he saw was beauty. She’d seen that clearly in his expression. She looked back at herself in the mirror, stood and really looked at her body. Yes, she was flawed because she was real, and it was the woman staring back at her that Gage wanted to spend the weekend with. And despite her nerves and insecurities, she really wanted that too.

  The following morning, Tilly placed her new pale pink lace panties and matching bra in her suitcase. Her reservations were made. Her bag was almost packed. She was going to see him. In a few short hours, she was going to see Gage, a man she hadn’t been able to get out of her thoughts since almost the moment they met. She knew she was playing with fire, had so many reasons to back out, to come to her senses, but she had only one reason to go...he made her feel alive.

  So lost in her thoughts and surprised to see Luke home because he’d left for work hours ago, she jumped when he appeared in their room.

  Absently, she blurted out, “What are you doing home?”

  He grabbed the collar of a blouse, unfolding it as he lifted it. “Don’t you think this is a little fancy for a ‘me’ weekend?”

  Tilly couldn’t help the anger. He never paid her any attention, but she’s off for a weekend, and he’s home, checking up. “Is that why you’re here? To check up on me?”

  “Didn’t get a chance to say goodbye earlier, you were sleeping.”

  Tilly had her doubts about that, and worse, feared her husband might suspect something. But even as she thought that, she dismissed it because he needed to be around to suspect something. It didn’t stop the guilt from twisting her stomach, but it also stirred anger. He never paid her any attention. Blew off the only date they’d made in months. He hadn’t touched her in forever, except for that one night. He didn’t care why she was going into the city. All he knew was that she was leaving, putting the responsibility for his own life in his hands. That’s what he didn’t like. How had she not seen how selfish he had grown?

  Tilly snatched the blouse from his hands. “I haven’t been to the city in years. I have every intention of treating myself to dinner.”

  Luke lifted her new panties. Her heart dropped. “Never seen these before.” Luke bit out.

  The lie was easier to say than it should have been. “If you spent even
a fraction of the time you spent at work, here, you would know all kinds of things.”

  “Well, I work a normal full-time job, Tillian, which includes me being away from the house. A house that,” Luke jabbed himself in his chest for emphasis. “I pay for.” He snapped and started toward the door. “You don’t work like—”

  Tilly’s temper spiked. “I work my ass off, both here and the design work I’m doing now.”

  Luke rolled his eyes. “Fine, but your little income doesn’t pay for anything.”

  What it would have cost him over the years to hire a full-time housekeeper, nanny, gardener, accountant...he wouldn’t have all that much of his income left. She knew he didn’t appreciate all she did, but actually hearing him minimize it just pissed her off more.

  “I had a degree in design, but you wanted a house and you wanted me to make it a home. Then I got pregnant and I wasn’t allowed to work. I had to be home for the kids. You might pay for the house, but who makes sure the mortgage is paid? Who handled the fucking termites that would have eaten your precious home? Who pays the bills so you can spend your life on that fucking phone? You might bring the money home, though that’s changing, but you don’t run this house.” She stabbed her chest. “That’s all me, sweetheart.”

  Luke waved his hands in the air. “Ohhh, Miss big shot. You make a few calls, dabble with a few drawings, Tillian, don’t act like you saved the fucking world.”

  “Without me, Luke, your fucking world would crumble. If you’d pull your head out of your ass, you would see that.” She was so pissed she didn’t let herself dwell on her weekend plans. She had no argument if she did. “This is your way of wishing me a good weekend? You didn’t need to bother.”

  Luke hung his head and looked to the floor. “You’re right. You do a lot around here, but I do a lot, too,” He told her in a low voice, lifting his head, meeting Tilly’s eyes. “Sometimes it feels like you don’t appreciate that.”

  Tilly held onto her anger because how like him to turn this around and make it about him. “I appreciate it by doing all that I do around here. What have you done lately to show your appreciation for all that I do?”

  He said nothing, just held her hard stare for a few seconds. There was something in his gaze, something that looked a bit like contrition before he offered, “Have fun on your me weekend. I gotta get back to work.” He started for the door, but hesitated when he reached it. He looked back at her and whispered, “I’ll miss you.” He walked out before she could reply. Not that she had one. Was he sorry to see her go because he would truly miss her or just miss her doing all that she did around the house? She suspected the latter, which made her even more determined to follow through on her weekend; because right or wrong, she deserved more and Gage was the man who could give that to her, even if it was only for the weekend.

  _______________

  “Are you excited?” Scarlett asked before taking a bite of her eggs.

  Gage shrugged, doing his best to hide the excitement coursing through his veins. “Sure. It’s a convention, one I’ve gone to for years.”

  “Yeah, but you get to see all the new equipment that’s coming out,” she offered and took a sip of her orange juice.

  Gage took a bite of his toast and muttered around chewing, “True.”

  Scarlett looked down at her plate and asked lowly, “Guess Mom isn’t showing?” She lifted her head and shot a look toward the door of the cafe.

  “No, Letty, she isn’t,” Gage said softly. “She had a meeting.”

  “Yeah,” Scarlett uttered and finished her last piece of bacon.

  Gage offered her one of his own, but she shook it off. “Next weekend, you wanna head over to Hershey Park, binge on chocolate?”

  Scarlett smiled. “I’d like that.” She grabbed for the offered bacon, snatching it off Gage’s plate. He smiled at her. “Can Rachelle come with us?”

  “Like I’m gonna turn down a weekend with two pretty girls.” Gage chuckled. “Of course she can.”

  Gage felt a bit of guilt rise to the back of his throat. Here he was only hours from leaving for Philly to spend it with a woman who wasn’t his wife. Making plans to spend the following weekend at Hershey Park with his daughter and her friend. Jesus. He was a complete fucking dick.

  “You seem really happy today,” Scarlett said, and Gage lifted his gaze from his mug of coffee to look at his daughter. “I like it.”

  Scarlett’s words had that guilt falling back down his throat to be eaten by the acid. If she only she knew why he was so fucking happy. Not that she didn’t contribute to it, she did, waking up early to have breakfast with him before he left. “Thanks, sweetheart.” He looked to his watch. “Gotta finish up or you’re gonna be late for school.”

  They finished their meals, and on the way to Scarlett’s school, they both came up with all kinds of suggestions to do when they went to Hershey. Gage watched his daughter walk to the double doors, two girls joining her for the walk. He took a deep breath. If it all went to hell and came to a head, the shit he was doing, her life would change. That thought had Gage shoving the shifter into park. Not only would he pay for the consequences of his affair, but his daughter would, too. He could back out. Now, would be the time. He rubbed his hands down his face, trying to wipe away the feelings building. He recalled Scarlett’s words—he looked happy. He knew that had to do with Tilly. He reached for the shifter, throwing the truck in drive. He took off and grabbed for his cell.

  “Hey,” Dom said when the ringing stopped.

  “You ready?” Gage asked him.

  Dom chuckled. “Yeah, why in the fuck we leaving so early? Normally, we get there at night.”

  Gage blew out a breath, “I’ll tell you on the way. Five minutes out, see you soon.” Gage ended the call. When he pulled up in front of Dom’s house, he let out another deep breath. It was going to be the longest hour of his life.

  CHAPTER NINE

  The drive into the city had been stressful because she’d hit rush hour traffic. When she pulled in for valet parking at the Hyatt, it took a minute for it to sink in. She was here. He was here. Anticipation replaced stress.

  She climbed from the car, handed off her key, and got her ticket. She was supposed to go to Gage’s room, the thought had butterflies going crazy in her stomach, but as she walked into the lobby of the hotel, she headed to the front desk to secure her own room. She knew she wouldn’t be using it, wasn’t even going to stop by and drop off her things, but if a hotel room didn’t show up on her credit card statement, it would raise a red flag. That thought had her steps faltering. It had all been in theory, their weekend. Even that day they spent together had seemed more like a dream, but she was here. She was getting ready to pay for a room she had no intention of using, was doing so to maintain the lie. It wasn’t Luke that came to mind. It was her kids. What was she teaching them? That was a double-edged sword because to follow her heart, which she’d told them they should do, she had to lie, she had to deceive. And even knowing she wasn’t being much of a role model, she wanted this weekend. One weekend for herself. She started toward the desk, went through the motions of signing for the room. With her key card in hand, she walked to the elevators, but she didn’t hit the button. She just stood there, watching as people got on and off, knowing once she took the step, entered the elevator and hit his floor, there would be no going back.

  Gage stepped onto the elevator and weaved his way to the back. He tucked his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. As the small box descended, Gage felt every drop in his gut. All the excitement began to lean toward hesitation. Once he exited the elevator, found her, there would be no going back. He removed a hand, running it through his hair, taking a deep breath. Louder than he thought when an older woman looked back at him, giving him a small smile. He smiled back. His thoughts moved to the conversation he and Dom had on the way there. And how what Gage was doing was w
rong, but not every wrong thing in life turned out to be a disaster. Beautiful things have bloomed from wrongs in the world. Dom had asked Gage one question—was he sure it was Tilly that he wanted and not just the idea of someone else. Gage couldn’t answer that question, because he wasn’t even sure.

  The elevator stopped.

  The ding echoed in the small space.

  The doors slid slowly open.

  And there she was. Standing by the elevators looking how he felt. He knew the answer to Dom’s question. It was Tilly he wanted. His breath caught in his lungs. He began moving toward the front, trying not to push everyone out of the way. Her eyes were to the floor. The woman in front of him dropped her purse, delaying him from getting to the one he wanted. He saw Tilly’s eyes close as she stood still to the spot only a few feet from him.

  “Tilly!” Gage shouted over everyone, causing the commotion of the woman’s purse spilling on the floor to move to him.

  Her head jerked up, searching, until she saw him, and in that moment, all she felt was happiness. He was caught behind a crowd of people, but it was the look on his face, the same hesitation warring with want that she felt that had her own hesitation fading. He looked impatient; she understood completely.

  One of the men blocking Gage followed his eyes, saw Tilly and brought his attention back to Gage. “Don’t let us keep you.” The man moved to the side. Gage took a huge step over the other woman, reaching for the contents of the woman’s purse. He weaved through the crowd waiting to enter the elevator.

  “Excuse me,” he kept on repeating as he bumped into people.

  His eyes met her hazel ones, and he smiled. She returned it, and when he got within arm’s reach, he wrapped his around her waist, pulling her into him. His head fell to the crook of her neck, and he took a deep inhale. Lavender filled his nose, easing all the tension he held in his body for three weeks.