The Commander's Warrior Mate

by A. R. Kayne

“You didn’t and you don’t have to be afraid anymore. He’s in custody. He’s going to be transferred to an evaluation facility.”

  Jess and stared at her. “You already knew about it?”

  “Yes. It’s why I came here. Security was aware of the situation; they notified me after I woke up. I apologize for the subterfuge.”

  “I’m sorry for causing trouble.”

  Dr. Ales’ expression hardened. “You didn’t. He did when he smuggled dust on board, fried his brain, and assaulted you. We’re living on a starship that travels to the edges of space. We have to be able to trust each other and we can’t have someone like him living here. What if he’d assaulted a child or someone else who couldn’t defend herself?”

  Jess nodded mutely.

  “Now, let’s talk about your life since the attack. How well are you sleeping?”

  After a series of questions, Dr. Ales relaxed against the sofa. “You’ve handled the events well, but you’re coping with some residual issues. That’s natural, but I want to see you every couple of days while you work through this. If you have concerns between appointments, come see me immediately. How are you otherwise?”

  “Wobbly, I guess. Like my skin doesn’t fit right.”

  “Is that related to the assault?”

  “Maybe some. I saw the brief about the Ghul, the one that showed the bodies. Have you heard about it?”

  “I have.” Dr. Ales frowned. “I disagreed with Pryce about circulating it. He’s very impressed by what you did, though, and thought there were vital lessons in it for some of the crew.”

  Jess shook her head in disbelief. “How can he be impressed by killing? I did what I had to, but there’s nothing to be proud of.”

  “I don’t think it’s the killing that impressed him. He was struck by your resourcefulness and bravery, and the fact that you risked your life for a child you didn’t know. He also wanted to make a point to the crew about being complacent. We feel confident when we’re walking around with our big powerful weapons, but the fact is that we’re still vulnerable.”

  “I’m not so sure the crew are getting that message. My friends were laughing about it like children. I feel like I’m a different species than them. I don’t feel like a normal person.”

  “Jess, you are normal. You’re a normal woman who’s had unusual experiences. Some people will have difficulty grasping how serious they were. However, that’s a reflection on their maturity, not on you. Saying that your friends were laughing like children is a very good analogy.”

  “Yes. I’m beginning to think most of the men I’ve dated aren’t men at all. They’re just children in big bodies.”

  Dr. Ales looked at her keenly. “How is that going, meeting people and developing a social life?”

  “It was fun at first. Now I’m just tired. I haven’t felt anything beyond friendship for any of the men I’ve dated. I want to ask you something. When I first came on the ship, Pryce told me that I was compatible with one of the men on board. Have I met him?”

  Dr. Ales smiled in an impish manner. “What do you think?”

  Jess took a deep breath and let it out in a whoosh. “I don’t know. So much has happened lately that I feel like I’ve been turned upside down and inside out. The one thing I’m sure of is that it’s nobody I dated.”

  “Did Pryce ever tell you how the matching program works?”

  “Some. The shipboard computer and computers elsewhere do physical and personality checks and use them to pair people up.”

  “That’s right. I think you understand the basics. Ship people put a lot of faith into the matching program. They’re logical people. They like statistics and measurements and they love the idea that there’s a scientific way to pair people up like shoes. They think that if they meet that one ideal person, the one the program says is for them, their lives will be perfect.

  “Who knows? Perhaps for them, the program is a good thing. It’s become a way for people to find partners across vast distances, so that part of it is good. However, the obsession and complete faith in it are not. The truth is that all of us have many possible mates. If we’re mostly compatible with someone, the success of a relationship depends on how much we invest in it. The most important things are two people deciding they’re going to make a relationship work and behaving with compassion.”

  Jess nodded. “I think I understand.”

  “My opinion is very unpopular,” said Dr. Ales. “The program can be a useful shortcut, but you don’t need it to tell you that you’re compatible with someone. My husband and I had fifty-three wonderful years together. There weren’t any reliable tests when we met. If you wanted a partner, you had to meet people, think about what you wanted, and trust your instincts.

  “That’s what I want you to do now. Have experiences. Think about them. Trust your instincts. You’re very young. You have many decades of life ahead of you and there’s no hurry to pair up. Don’t be pushed along a path just because of a test. Before you came to the ship, you didn’t even know those existed. Yet somehow, the people on Draco had been finding mates and having happy marriages for hundreds of years.”

  “Alright.” Jess felt a little crestfallen.

  “You look upset. Is something wrong?”

  “No. I guess not. I just wondered if I’d met my mate. I feel confused. I hoped that knowing would make things clearer.”

  “What are you confused about?”

  “Pryce asked me out.”

  “Took him long enough,” Dr. Ales muttered. “Did he kiss you?”

  “What?” Jess stared at her. “Um. Yes. He, um.” She lapsed into a bashful silence.

  Dr. Ales watched her closely. Her lips twitched. “I see. Perhaps he did more than that?”

  “Yes.” Jess stood and paced nervously. “We touched. But we’ve always done that, since the day we met. We’ve always hugged and snuggled. I often fall asleep on his lap, here on the couch, and he carries me to bed. But I thought that was just us being friendly. Now I wonder if I was wrong.”

  “Was the touching during the date different?”

  “Yes. It was intense. It felt like it was more than being friendly, although I can’t say for sure. What if I imagined it?”

  “Why don’t you tell me exactly what happened?”

  Jess flushed and ducked her head. “We kissed. He, um, touched my breasts and we rubbed our fronts together. He said some things.”

  Dr. Ales smiled sweetly. “No. You didn’t imagine it. That definitely qualifies as sexual foreplay rather than casual, friendly touching. Did you enjoy it?”

  “Yes. Very much. So I wondered … have I met the man I’m supposedly compatible with?”

  “Yes. Unfortunately, I’m not supposed to name him. He specifically asked me not to.” There was a hint of mischief in Dr. Ales’ eyes.

  “Oh. What do I do now? What if it’s someone other than Pryce?”

  “That depends on what you want. Remember my advice to trust your instincts.”

  “I want to be with Pryce, if that’s possible. I don’t want to be with another man.”

  “How do you feel about telling him that?”

  “Terrified. How can you tell if a man is interested in you? What if he isn’t? I’m sure he’d be kind, but I’d feel so humiliated.”

  Dr. Ales chuckled. “You don’t need to worry about that. Pryce is eager to be with you, too. He’s been driving several of us crazy about it since you first came on the ship.”

  Jess was shocked. “He has? Why didn’t he tell me?” How could this have happened without her knowing about it?

  “You had a very rough time on Draco and moving to the ship turned your life upside down. He didn’t want to put you under more pressure. He was also afraid that you’d reject him. He was on the edge of approaching you a few months ago, then the two of you had a fight over the way he was dominating you. After that, you started dating and he backed off again.”

  “Oh! I didn’t realize! I thought he was angry with me.”
Jess tilted her head and squinted at Dr. Ales. “Um. Can I ask you something personal?”

  “Of course.”

  “Were you frightened the first time you had sex?”

  Dr. Ales smiled. “Oh, my goodness. That was such a long time ago. I can’t believe how long it’s been. No, I wasn’t frightened, but I was nervous. I remember worrying that the boy wouldn’t like my body. That’s common. It’s an incredibly intimate act, being naked with someone and letting them inside your body. However, when you’re with someone you love and the feelings are strong, at some point your instincts take over. You’re living in the moment and focussing on what you both feel. Maybe it’s a little awkward at first, but it becomes as natural as eating and sleeping.”

  Jess nodded. “Alright. Thank you.”

  “You’ll be fine. Just listen to your instincts. You don’t have to hurry into anything. In fact, given the assault, it might be best to wait and work through that first.”

  Jess shook her head vigorously. “I’m fine! I’d like to move on with my life as soon as possible. I’d like to be normal.”

  “You are normal.”

  “I’d like to do normal things. I want to work and be useful. I want to love and belong,” Jess said doggedly.

  Dr. Ales smirked. “That must have been quite a date. Where did he take you?” Jess had an embarrassing feeling the counselor could see right through her.

  “There was an overlook of the water planet,” Jess began, then she described the rest of the date.

  “That sounds very romantic. And he had pillows and blankets ready! Was there wine too? It’s almost as though he had plans other than a picnic. Tell me, was his hand under your dress when you woke up?”

  Jess’ brow furrowed. There had been something, some ghost of a sensation.

  Dr. Ales chuckled. “Never mind. That was an inappropriate question. I’m an old woman with a filthy, suspicious mind. I also have a pretty good idea of how Pryce’s brain works. You don’t have to tell me everything unless you just want to share it.

  “You’re in a period of discovery. It’s lovely and precious and I urge you to enjoy it. However, as your counselor, I must offer some cautions. I’ve known Pryce since he was a boy. He has a good heart but he didn’t become captain by being sweet and passive. He can be domineering, aggressive, and even ruthless. Those can be valuable qualities for a person with his responsibilities. However, they can also pose challenges in a partnership. If you’re with him, you’re going to have to maintain your sense of self. Don’t let him dominate you. Don’t let him force you down a particular path. Because he will. He’ll do it without even realizing it.”

  Jess’s head was spinning. She had some sense of what Dr. Ales meant, but it was all unfamiliar territory.

  “Alright.”

  “If you’re considering a permanent relationship with him – and I believe he will push for that – I urge you to take time to think about it. Pryce is charismatic, focussed, and intense. That can be exciting in an intimate relationship but overwhelming day to day. There really is no hurry. You could simply have fun with him for awhile without partnering.”

  Jess simply nodded. She wasn’t sure what, if anything, to say.

  “Do you still want to explore things with him?” asked Dr. Ales.

  “Yes.”

  “Do you feel that you can discuss that with him? If you’re going to be in a relationship, particularly with such a domineering man, you’re going to have to learn how to be frank and direct.”

  “I can try.” Somehow. She had no idea how to even start.

  “Would you prefer that the three of us met to discuss it?”

  Jess immediately felt lighter, as though she’d shed a load she hadn’t known she was carrying. “Yes. Please. Thank you so much.”

  Dr. Ales’ eyes crinkled. “No, thank you. Getting him off my back will be a relief!”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

  Pryce

  “Jess, are you alright?” Pryce called, pitching his voice so it would carry through her bedroom door.

  He’d spent seven tedious, never-ending days down on the water planet, trying to placate creatures who didn’t have even a stone age level of technology and who believed their sun was alive. He’d spent every one of those days aching to get back to Jess so they could pick up where they’d left off. However, his efforts to speed things along had been thwarted.

  First there’d been a banquet. He’d been presented with the writhing brain matter of a man-sized, freshly deceased animal that resembled a maggot. Only a strong desire to not provoke a diplomatic incident had kept him from puking.

  Next there’d been an attempt to marry him off to the ambassador’s offspring, a tentacled creature that might or might not have been female. Pryce had been strongly tempted to call the ship to summon one of the junior officers to take his place. According to rumor, there was a fellow on staff who’d attempt to fuck anything. Surely he wouldn’t want to miss the chance to add to his harem!

  At last, though, after dodging the marriage and exchanging token presents of ‘great value’ – Pryce had given the ambassador a hair comb he happened to have in his pocket, and the ambassador had given him a translucent blob that stank of decay – the formalities had been concluded and the researchers took over.

  When he returned to the ship, eager to pick up where he’d left off with Jess, a vaguely worded message from Dr. Ales had been waiting. Something about it set off alarm bells. He’d raced back to his quarters, where he was now standing outside Jess’s bedroom.

  “Computer, you’re sure Jess is in her room?”

  “Yes.”

  “This isn’t like her. Something is wrong,” Pryce muttered. He’d been rapping on her door for several minutes but there’d been no response. Fuck it! He was responsible for her safety! He was captain of the vessel and her mate, even if she didn’t know the latter fact yet. He had a need and a right to investigate.

  Pryce smacked his palm across the door lock. “Invoke my emergency access authority,” he told the computer. When the door slid open, moisture and the scent of flowers washed over him, but Jess wasn’t in the darkened room. Pryce prowled forward silently, all of his senses on alert.

  When he rounded the corner to her bathroom, he found her with her foot braced high, smoothing on lotion. She was nude, a cloud of hair drifting around her bare shoulders.

  He must have made a sound, however soft. She whirled around faster than his eyes could follow, grabbing a knife as she turned. She stood there bare, her eyes large with fright, with the knife ready in one hand. His eyes roamed over her body appreciatively, taking in its gentle swells and hollows. She flushed crimson all over, snatched a robe off the floor, and clutched it to the front of her body.

  “Easy. It’s just me,” he said, keeping the desire out of his voice with great effort. Fucking hell, she was beautiful. “I’m sorry I startled you. I was worried. Dr. Ales said something was wrong.”

  “I’m fine,” she murmured, her eyes fixed on the floor. “Just a little unsettled. I came in here to try to clear my thoughts. Thank you for checking on me, though.” She clutched at her robe nervously, gripping it so tightly her knuckles paled.

  He stepped closer toward her. “What’s wrong?”

  She shook her head and still wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Nothing. Pryce, I’m not dressed. I really need to cover up.”

  “You’re covered, at least in front.” Pryce decided not to mention the fact that he had a full view of her shapely bare ass in the mirror. Her hair was almost, but not quite, long enough to cover it. It was the kind of sight he’d never grow tired of. “Honey, I know something’s wrong. Why don’t you just tell me about it?”

  “It’s nothing. I had a bad date. I stabbed him, I left, and I’ve been going to counseling. I’m better now. Can you leave so I can get dressed, please?”

  “You had to stab someone.” Pryce’s heart began hammering. What had happened? It must have been bad if she’d pulled a knife. “Wha
t did he do? Did he hurt you?”

  He carefully lifted her hair away from her shoulders and looked for injuries. When he tried to tug her robe free, she squirmed away. He gripped her chin and turned her face up toward his. Her eyes were glossy with unshed tears. The sight was like a punch in the gut.

  He tried to smile reassuringly. “Tell me what happened, Jess. Tell me everything, step by step.” Tell me so I can go kill the man responsible.

  She shook her head. “Please, Pryce, I don’t want to talk about it with you. It’s so humiliating. I already discussed it with Dr. Ales. I really don’t want to go over it again. I don’t want you to know about it.”

  He pulled her close, so her head was nestled below his chin. “I need to know. It’s me, honey. You’re safe with me. You can tell me anything. You don’t even have to look at me while you do it, if that’ll make it easier. You can just kind of whisper it and pretend I’m not here.”

  Little by little, he coaxed the story out of her. Some of the terms she used were odd, but he got the gist of it. By the end, he was boiling.

  “Let me see if I understand,” Pryce said, in the calmest, most matter-of-fact tones he could manage. “You were out with a man and were injured. Instead of helping you, the fucker forced you in a toilet, pinned you against the wall, and tried to stick his filthy, diseased tongue in your mouth. When you refused him, as is your right, he jammed his hands under your clothes, yanked you around by your hair, and tried to stick his nasty, toxic prick in your mouth. Does that sound about right?”

  “Yes. I didn’t want to stab him, but I didn’t know what else to do.” Her voice was very small. “All I knew was that I wasn’t allowed to kill him.”

  “You did the right thing. He would have raped you, honey, and I don’t think for one minute that he would have stopped at your mouth. If you hadn’t stabbed him, he would have raped you and who knows what else. Who was it? Who did that to you? You need to tell me.”

  As he spoke, Pryce felt a curious sense of calm. He realized he was beyond rage. Someone was going to get to go on a walk with him, a nice scenic walk outside the ship without a suit on. The man could enjoy the pretty view of the water planet during the fifteen seconds before he passed out from lack of oxygen and died.