Seed of Scorn

by Aaron-Michael Hall

  She managed a wistful smile, leaning in to kiss him.

  “Pardons, milord, milady,” Micah said from the doorway.

  They quickly parted, noticing Nikolina standing beside him. Zeta turned, drying her face, and then moved to the door.

  “My lady,” Nikolina said, almost graciously. Zeta returned the spurious greeting, leaving them to their words.

  “Micah, would you please bring some refreshments for our guest?” Danimore asked, advancing toward Nikolina. His smile was genuine as he took her arm, leading her to the divan near the hearth. “You look beautiful.”

  Her heart fluttered. “Thank you, Nakshij.”

  “No. I’m always Danimore to you. Now, tell me: why have you come?”

  She wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him. She licked her lips, watching the movement of his. He was hers, regardless of his wife. Nikolina had planned to deceive him, now, she was of a different mind.

  “I wanted to offer my congratulations to you. I thought that I’d be your wife, but the pledge wasn’t completed. The fault doesn’t lie with you,” she was quick to add. “My father refused the offer and took you from me always.”

  “Forgive me, Nikolina. You would’ve made a wonderful wife. Of this, I’m certain. When my uncle told me about your refusal, I thought you didn’t desire me for a pledge. This, my heart couldn’t bear. I had eyes for no other, and the pain of your refusal overwhelmed me. In time, Zeta helped me regain myself.

  “There were no feelings beyond that of admiration in the beginning. I swear to you. Over time, many things changed. Zeta was there to soothe the ache I felt at losing you. There was none other I desired and thought you gone from me forever. It was a difficult time, and it took long for my heart to mend. She didn’t replace you, Nikolina, she couldn’t,” he said, never turning from her eyes. “Even with all that’s happened, please don’t misunderstand me. I do love my wife, but I loved you first.”

  Nikolina flushed. Hearing him say the words confirmed what was in her heart. Zeta stood between them. She used his weakness at losing his true love to claim him as her own. The more the thoughts came to her, the angrier she became. She took a deep breath and stood.

  “Nikolina,” Danimore said, rising and taking her arm. “I didn’t mean to wound you further. Know that I’ve always found you beautiful and forever will. Please forgive me.”

  Before she realized her actions, her lips covered his. When Danimore tried to move away, she drew him closer, deepening the kiss.

  He gripped her arms tighter, gently pushing away. “We can’t, Nikolina, I’m sorry.”

  “It isn’t your fault. I—I—I thought—I…” Her voice trembled, petering to nothing. After a deep and steadying breath, she managed to meet his eyes. “Please, can you come to my home for noon meal?”

  “What? I don’t know if that would be proper. Zeta would surely question the wisdom in accepting such an invitation, and I’d have to agree with my wife.”

  “Danimore, I apologize for my weakness. There’s much I want to say, but I can’t continue, not now. Please, being here, I…I…it’s difficult. Please, join us for our midday meal, at your convenience, of course. My father will be there, and no one will disturb us.”

  He knew he shouldn’t accept the offer, and the voice screaming in his mind spoke the same. His guilt drowned out such warnings, negating any logical reason to refuse. He attempted to speak, but his voice failed him, preventing a response. Instead, he felt himself nodding, and then immediately panicked, understanding the complications such an invitation could cause.

  “Thank you, Danimore,” she said, sweetly. “My father will attend to the arrangements when your schedule permits.”

  He stood frozen in place as she leaned in, gently touching his lips with hers. Danimore collapsed in the chair, watching her leave the room. Burying his head in his hands, he dreaded not only his acceptance, but mostly, telling his wife.

  Unexpected Visit

  Brahanu smiled, positioning Eytan in the bed beside her. He lay in his father’s place, and that memory was both heartening and sorrowful. She missed being with Itai, but she lamented his absence for Eytan most of all.

  Closing her eyes, she pictured the last she’d seen Itai. Not as he was in the Animus Wood, but when last they were together in their home. Brahanu recalled every moment of their bond day, and his reaction when learning about her pregnancy. Warm tears filled the narrow space between her lids, thinking of when he’d asked her father about their promise. Itai’s eyes never left the floor as his hands continued to fidget. Though standing taller and more muscled than any man in the village, at that moment, he appeared more a pubescent boy being chastised by his father.

  “Your father loves you, Eytan,” she whispered to her sleeping son. “He’ll always be with you.”

  She thought about their times together. Those memories and the feelings they elicited warm more than her heart, they touched her very soul. She couldn’t lose that connection or allow any of her love to fade. Without that love, she’d lose Itai completely, and Brahanu wouldn’t allow that for herself, or for her son.

  Eytan’s soft gurgles brought her from her contemplation. Her smile was immediate when she opened her eyes, noticing his demeanor.

  “Are you laughing?”

  Deep dimples adorned Eytan’s chubby cheeks as he smiled again, while playfully cooing. As she stared down at him, the coos sounded more like giggles as his arm raised up, swaying in the air as if someone had hold of it. Brahanu rose up, feeling a gush of warmth suffuse the room.

  “Itai?” she murmured, glancing around. “Please. Itai?”

  I’m here with you, she heard, as soft as the flutter of butterfly wings.

  “Itai,” she gasped. “Are you here? Can—can you reach Eytan? Are you with us?”

  What remains of me will be with you always. I am a part of you, Brahanu, both you and Eytan.

  Tears spilled from her eyes, as she lifted Eytan from the bed. “We love you, Itai. That will never change. Please—”

  Brahanu nearly jumped when a loud knock sounded on the door.

  “No…Itai? Itai?” Silence. “Please, Itai, are you here?”

  Quiet filled the room as the warmth of their connection faded. Brahanu nestled Eytan closer, clutching the only living part of Itai remaining in her life.

  When the knock repeated, Brahanu grudgingly rose to answer it.

  “Drummond?” she said. “Is everything all right?”

  “It is, my lady. The Caretaker sent me to retrieve you.”

  “What? I’ve only just returned. Are you certain that there’s nothing wrong?”

  “I am. Please, come,” he said, gesturing to the waiting carriage. “You’re expected.”

  Brahanu’s brow furrowed, accepting his outstretched arm. She was frustrated by the interruption, but knew Julaybeim wouldn’t have sent for her if it wasn’t necessary. She scarcely felt the carriage’s movement as they clopped down the narrow road. Brahanu’s thought stayed on Itai. She felt grateful and cheated all at once, missing the first man she’d ever loved. At that, she nearly called out to Drummond. She wanted to return home and feel Itai’s love encompass Eytan and her. She missed her late husband, and didn’t want to deny Eytan the connection that could only be felt in the home his father had built.

  Brahanu did her best to force those thoughts away and focus on her brother. Julaybeim was struggling to maintain order in Cazaal and more people were voicing their displeasure with the Nazilians. She was concerned about how Pentanimir would be received, but also Tardison.

  When Hosdaq and Osmara had arrived, the villagers’ reactions were astonishing. Hosdaq’s reception wasn’t as warm as Julaybeim had hoped, and some glared at Osmara for being with him. Most were respectful, but their demeanor spoke volumes over those feigned pleasantries.

  Brahanu was startled when Drummond opened the carriage door, extending out a hand to her. “May I help you, my lady?”

  Brahanu smiled, taki
ng his hand, allowing him to lead her to the entrance. Before they even reached the door, Mena opened it.

  “It’s good to see ya, milady. The Caretaker asked me to tend the babe and have you join him in the solar.”

  Brahanu returned her smile, handing Eytan over for care. “Thank you, Mena,” she said, smoothing the tulle fabric of her skirt before stepping down the hall. Taking several deep breaths, Brahanu did her best to calm her thoughts before entering the room. With everything Julaybeim was facing, she didn’t want to add to his burdens with concerns about her well-being.

  After tapping lightly on the door, Brahanu fixed a smile on her face and then stepped through, only to stagger back again. “Pentanimir!”

  His smile took in his entire face as he turned, rushing to greet her. Brahanu nearly swooned from the strength and passion of his kiss, accompanied by the heat his touch ignited.

  “Gods, I’ve missed you,” he whispered, and then kissed her again.

  “I…I…missed you, too. How? wh—when?”

  “We only arrived a short time ago.”

  “‘We?”

  “Yes,” Gali said, standing and facing her.

  “Tardison!” Brahanu rushed over to them, lifting him from Gali’s arms and smothering Tardison with kisses. “I’ve missed you both so much.”

  “Symeon and Wosen accompanied us,” Pentanimir said. “They’re having a meal in the kitchen.”

  Julaybeim slid an arm around Gali’s waist, bringing her in close. “We’ll leave you to speak privately. If you need us, we’ll be in the main room with Hosdaq and Osmara.”

  When the door closed, Pentanimir immediately drew her closer, giving her a proper kiss.

  “Forgive me,” he said. “I couldn’t wait any longer. My need for you was too great.”

  Brahanu returned his impassioned kiss, and then led him to the divan. “You weren’t alone in your desire, Pentanimir, I’ve missed both you and Tardison terribly. Tioch needed time with Eytan, but I need the same with you. I’m happy that you came.”

  “Is Eytan with Tioch now?”

  “No, he’s with Mena, but you’ll be able to see him soon.”

  Pentanimir nodded. Everything that he wanted to say was lost in the deep brown of her eyes. None of that mattered, at least, for now. He edged closer, caressing her cheek. The heat elicited from that touch sent urgings through his body, an ache reminiscent of the last time they were together in Cazaal.

  “Julaybeim had your bedchamber prepared for us,” he spoke softly, tickling her neck with his fingertips.

  Brahanu’s subsequent moan made his smile broaden as he helped her to stand, and then reunited Tardison with his brother.

  Pentanimir barely had the bedchamber door closed before feeling his back pressed against it. Brahanu savored his lips as he grappled at her laces, tugging the confining dress free. When her garments met the floor, he swiveled away from the door, holding her out at arm’s length.

  “Gods, I’ve missed you,” he said, breathily, enjoying her nakedness. It had been too long since he’d seen her…kissed her…and made love to her.

  Brahanu covered his lips again, tossing his belt aside and unclasping his tunic. As she led him to the bed, he laid her down in its center, removing his boots and allowing her to do the same to his trews. When her hands glided down his abdomen, he shook his head, moving over her. His lips traced down her body, leaving teasing tickles ending with an intimate kiss.

  When last they’d made love in Cazaal, it was rushed and unplanned. This time would be different. Pentanimir was unrelenting, not allowing his own completion until Brahanu was exhausted from the numerous eruptions of pleasure. As he gave into the feeling, she drew him down, enjoying his lips and the heat of his satisfaction filling her.

  “That was like never before,” she breathed, as he collapsed beside her.

  “Were you pleased, my lady?” he asked, still catching his breath.

  Brahanu chuckled, snuggling into his chest. “I’m always pleased with, and by you, Pentanimir, from the very beginning.”

  For a moment, he didn’t respond, relishing the feel of her. He hadn’t realized how much he needed to be with her. It wasn’t merely the joining of their bodies, it was the joining of their hearts. Pentanimir needed her in Nazil with him, but he didn’t know how to ask of it.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked. “You don’t look like a man whose just made love to his wife.” She raised up then, taking his hand in hers.

  “I’m all right. I’ve just missed you.”

  “It’s more than that, Pentanimir. Please, what’s happened?”

  “Nothing…everything…and more.” He shook his head, sitting up and embracing her. “I’ve missed you, Brahanu. I didn’t understand how much until smelling the sweet oils on your neck and feeling you next to me. Being at your side now causes me to realize how incomplete I feel when you’re away from me. I couldn’t bear it another moment. We were apart for too long before the war. I don’t want to be apart from you now that we’ve won it.” He sighed. “I don’t mean to be selfish, but I need you, Brahanu. I need both you and Eytan in Nazil with me.”

  “It’s not selfishness, Pentanimir, it’s love. I’m glad that you’ve come, truly. Being in my former home brings both joy and anguish. I can feel and see Itai within every shadow with his voice whispering in my ear. The Guardians’ words are true, Husband. The connection remains.”

  When Pentanimir attempted to speak, she rested a finger on his lips. “But my place is with you. Tioch and Naji have spent time with Eytan, and I’ll visit again soon. For now, I need to be with my husband in Nazil.”

  “Are you certain?”

  “I am. Eytan and Tardison mustn’t be separated.” She paused, leaning in for another kiss. “And neither should we.”

  He nodded, drawing her in closer. “I’ll wash up now and then speak with Hosdaq. Will you stay here with me, Brahanu?”

  “I will. There’s no other place I wish to be, my love.”

  Pentanimir smiled, moving to the basin. As he dipped a cloth in the water, Brahanu laid back, admiring his nakedness.

  “My love for you is eternal, but that’s all I have left to give. If you can have the happiness you brought to my life with another, I’d have it so. Know that my heart never belonged to any other. Now, the love of you and my son will fill me as I await you beyond the falls.”

  Brahanu closed her eyes, recalling Itai’s words. I will, my husband. I’ll always love you, Itai, but my life isn’t in Cazaal. It’s with Pentanimir, she thought, gazing over at him again.

  “Would you like to join us?” Pentanimir said, patting himself dry. “Hosdaq brought a half dozen bereles of tej. It’s authentic, not like the last we had.”

  She smiled at that, having grown fond of the flavorful honey wine. “I’ll need to recover my strength first. My husband was relentless in bed this eve. I’m not certain my gait will be steady.”

  He chuckled. “If you haven’t noticed my weakened stance, I doubt your gait will matter. Besides, I’d like you to hear the news from Kaleo and Spero. Much is taking place, and I’d have you involved in all matters of the lands.”

  “I’ve heard some of the troubles we’re facing. Julaybeim has met opposition here, too.”

  “So I’ve learned,” he said, taking a seat beside her. “There’s considerable unrest, especially amongst the Nazilians.”

  “I understand, Pentanimir. This change won’t be swift, but you have both men and women of honor supporting you. In time, the lands will mend, and common sense and logic will prevail. You are the Zaxson of Nazil, my love. Through you, Faélondul will unite.”

  “Hearing you speak those words calms my spirit. We are a part of each other, you and I, and I’ll forever love you.”

  “As I will, you.”

  The conversation was much the same when Pentanimir arrived. He slipped through the door, trying to remain unnoticed. He failed.

  “Ah, it’s good you could join us,” Julaybeim said
. “How was your visit with Brahanu?”

  Pentanimir flushed, seeing the men’s grins. “Yes, Lady Benoist was indeed gracious.”

  Symeon clapped him on the shoulder as he sat beside him. “What have I missed?” Pentanimir asked, and then cleared his throat.

  “We were speaking about some news from Kaleo,” Hosdaq said. “Once we’ve visited Noraa, Osmara and I plan to speak with Yonas directly.”

  Pentanimir’s brow creased. “Kaleo? What news?”

  “Several things,” Julaybeim said. “When Yonas visited not long ago, he mentioned some Nazilians that were detained before the war. He’d liked them returned to their homes as soon as possible. Mayhaps a word from you could see them safe.”

  “They still have captives?” Pentanimir asked. “Why is Yonas holding them?”

  “Faélondul might’ve been liberated, but many humans remember when it wasn’t,” Julaybeim said. “After the increase of violence, Yonas didn’t want to release the Nazilians within the populace. He’d prefer they be escorted from Kaleo by a sizeable retinue.”

  “I understand some trepidation,” Pentanimir said. “But certainly escorting them to the gates should be sufficient.”

  “The Kaleon Council advises against it. Many denizens await such an opportunity to waylay these men once their free from Kaleo’s protections. Their concerns are valid, Zaxson,” Julaybeim said. “Yonas holds them not for reprimand, but for protection.”

  “How many Nazilians remain guests of Yonas?”

  “There are merely eight,” Julaybeim said.

  Pentanimir thought for a moment, and then shifted to look at Symeon.

  “Would you have Wosen and me travel to Kaleo, Zaxson?” Symeon asked. “We could take possession of the men and deliver them to Spero.”

  “I had thoughts of the same, but I’d need to travel with you. Your appearance would serve well the people of Kaleo, but it would be prudent to have at least one Nazilian, too. We don’t know the nature of these men, and I don’t want any complications on the trek to Spero.”