Death and Dishonor

by Abhimanyu Saxena

  I wore my shirt and looked at her sad face. She still looked beautiful with all the tears flowing down her cheeks.

  “It will be a lot difficult for your Baba to marry you off. You are stuck in this mess because of me. Let me untangle it for you. Consider this your wedding gift.”

  “I am not enjoying it any bit. I didn’t want any of this.”

  I nodded and hugged her lightly. “I know it. That’s the reason I am taking this decision.”

  “What are you saying? I am not able to understand anything, Arjun.”

  “You cannot have a normal life until you are tied with my case, and out of all the people in the world, you deserve the best. I screwed up your life once; I cannot do it again.”

  “Sorry!” she cried even harder.

  “I don’t know what will I do, but I would sleep a little calmly knowing you are out of this. So, what we will do is – I will throw you out of my car outside Agastya Hospital just so that people can see me. Go straight to Vijay then, and tell him that I forced you to help me at gunpoint.”

  “No –”

  “Just listen, you will say the same story to Police as well. I held you at gunpoint, and you had no other option.”

  “How will I live with myself knowing that you screwed up your life even more because of me?”

  I smiled. “You will learn to.”

  “Arjun – you ar – are the best I never had. Shikha was a lucky girl.”

  I hugged her again and caressed her hair. I would miss the hell out of this girl, but some things are meant to be done even if they are the most painful.

  “I will be available in case you need any help.”

  “No, you won’t. Just try to forget me Tia, and stop crying!”

  I kissed her wet cheek, and she cried even harder. My life was indeed screwed up.

  ~*~

  The doorbell rang with a familiar voice which the woman in the house recognized, “Honey! It’s me.”

  She rushed to the door and opened it looking excitedly at the man, “Come on in fast, it’s about to start.”

  “I have got biryani!” he said happily, showing the takeout bag to her.

  “Awesome! I will get that into plates.”

  The husband got changed as she served the hot biryani onto two plates, and poured the curry around it just as they liked.

  They sat down on the couch with their plates and turned on the TV. They switched to the News Now channel, and watched eagerly as the animation played for Rita Ki Report with a headline called ‘Exit Poll debate.’ Rita came into view sitting behind her dais in a fabulous red dress. They were so glad that they could start watching it in time and didn’t miss a moment.

  Rita started, “Welcome to Rita ki Report. Whew! So many adrenaline-pumping weeks till the big day, and now exit polls are here at our door. As anticipated, this has been a Devraj vs. Satyendra battle all the way with all the other parties wrapping up in the others’ section of the polls. You can now see the numbers on my left side.”

  She paused as the display behind flashed the result of the exit polls. Devraj’s black hammer and fist crisscrossing glowed at the top with 57%, Satyendra’s green fields with rising sun were at 32%, and there was a dull Others in grey shades with 11%.

  Rita was put into view again with two other gentlemen on her either side behind the dais. The man at her left was middle-aged and wore a polo shirt. The one at her right looked a bit older and wore a kurta and a blazer over it.

  She continued on her cue, “We have two guests with us today, the gentleman at my left is Mr. Raman Kishore, a renowned journalist, and the gentlemen at my right is Mr. Abhay Kumar Singh, Minister of Parliament.”

  She looked at Abhay, and said, “Counting is in two days, but it looks like we already have a winner here. What are your views on that?”

  Abhay smiled lightly, and began, “Today’s generation, they have lost themselves in the lust for technology, and Devraj is driving just that to keep him going. Whether he is going to do anything or not, he is promising a level of development that our time is getting attracted with. Look at what our CM’s achieved. He has streamlined everything to the convenience of the citizens of the capital. He helped the people so much during demonetization, and made it such a smooth process, ensuring no one lost their hard earned worth. Devraj talks about his out of the box methods, but that is just going to cripple the very foundation that our CM has built.”

  Rita turned to Raman, “What about your views?”

  Raman scoffed a little at Abhay, saying, “Mr. Singh, I think you mean that what our CM has set up, that is it? We can’t improve upon that? It has not been an extremely smooth ride. People had to go through a lot of trouble through the sudden demonetization. People even died to describe the harshness of the situation.”

  Abhay countered, “You are describing the same things which were picked up at that time as well, and then improved upon. We all came out of that, and now look at us, the second set of new currency notes is launching, and no one is facing any issues.”

  Raman shook his head, “Some of us didn’t come out. Rita, my point is that Devraj has observed the flaws in the present candidacy, and already made thought-out plans to remediate the same. We can all take a great example of his unhesitating effort in Mirzapur during such tough times. People could be skeptical of these out of box methods, but they will realize when it all turns out for the benefit of them. We can place our faith in Devraj for that, and as you can see from the exit polls, many have been.”

  Satyendra and some of the people from his party watched the debate in gloomy silence. He was shocked as he didn’t anticipate that despite all his effort, Devraj had managed to stick in so well. He always had seen him as a threat, and didn’t underestimate him, but to drive so many of his supporters out right from under his nose…

  Devraj beamed at the television as the debate went on. He started personally thanking his party members for their hard work which had already set him on his way to sudden glory.

  ~*~

  The bottles shattered in my line of sight as I continued firing silenced rounds from the big bad rifle. I had set up a makeshift range at the junkyard where I was trying out some of the international merch in Akshay’s possession.

  Akshay had pointed out that he would be seeing a lot of jail time if the authorities checked the other building in the junkyard which was smaller than the bunker and he was right! I had broken the padlock and nearly fainted seeing inside.

  It was filled with stolen rare, valuable collections like ornaments, rare paintings, and a lot of different modern and antique weaponry from around the world. There were lots of guns, swords, knives, and other ranged weapons from India, America, Russia, and other European and Asian countries.

  I set up some bottles at a distance on a suitable junkyard pile and created a perch for myself on some cement bags. The hard part was selecting a good weapon, but I didn’t have to look long. My eyes fell on the US Army issued MK17 SCAR-H battle rifle. It was multi-purpose having assault as well as sniping capabilities.

  The accuracy and precision of each shot was very impressive. The damage level with those 7.62 mm caliber bullets was amazing. Firing a few more single bursts, I realized that the damage these caused could not be worse than my current situation.

  Tia had left me, and it was digging up new avenues of disturbing memories where I was being morphed into shady footages. It had forced me to think about new possibilities now, doubting what my wife had got herself into, of which I didn’t even have a clue.

  I was sure of one thing though. I was done getting depressed about my life. I started believing that it just slows me down, and I had to be far from that. I had to figure out the ‘follow your heart’ clue now. It could be the last piece. I got up from there and put the rifle back. Distractions will not help me at the end of the day.

  I closed up the armory and went to the bunker. I sat on a chair and tried to focus on what could be the clue. I had already checked my wife’s, a
nd Aditi’s side of the picture, but what else could it be?

  I saw the old radio still sat at Akshay’s desk. I brought it to the table and turned it on. I hated myself for getting distracted again, but couldn’t help. The channel was delivering some local news-

  “The Paws Adoption Program is starting in the capital and is ready to set up its first drive in South Delhi. It could be a golden chance for some of the animal shelters to get these cute little paws in a home. We have heard that in the last few months, one of the known dog shelters in the capital, Bedrock has run into a lot of problems due to the negligence of their owners. The Court had then transferred the ownership to an NGO Paws led by Sameer Mittal.

  Something got me hitched to this news, and I listened on.

  “We interviewed Sameer about the same,” after that, the voice turned to Sameer’s, “but I was always a fan of the place; the way the dogs were treated was such a beautiful sight. They treated them like children. Unfortunately, it fell on bad times, but our team has renovated it into its original glory, and now we have started the adoption program. I request people to adopt these little guys at Paws Camp. You can still build a home for these adorable pups.”

  I didn’t hear anything else as the RJ’s voice drowned.

  Instead, I smiled as I was hearing the happy barks of the cute little pups rushing towards Aditi and me. I saw her and myself crouched down on the big playground as the dogs rushed towards us, jumping around and cuddling. There was a lamppost on the ground with a sign called Bedrock. I loved getting cuddled by these furry little guys.

  I snapped out of it, a smile on my face, but my mind tricks had a different plan for me.

  “Woof!” I heard the little bark and saw a ghostly figure of Jackie; my cutest golden retriever was running around my eleven-year-old version and jump into his arms. The vision quickly changed to his bloody, lifeless body with shards of a broken vase piercing him.

  I snapped myself out thinking these visions will only distract me. It was bad enough that the news had to drop now that the Bedrock was closing at the time… I should be focusing on Aditi.

  But the Bedrock was all Aditi. This had a story behind it as well.

  Aditi used to be very concerned about the street dogs in our colony. She used to play with them from time to time and provided them with food and water.

  She introduced me to a small abandoned street pup once, and I grew attached to it. With his cute little-bewildered eyes, it somehow reminded me of Jackie. Aditi and I used to play with him nearly every day. We named him Dino, as we used to love Flintstones.

  Once after returning from work, I spotted him limping by the side of the road. I picked him up and drove to Aditi’s house.

  Aditi let out a gasp, and said, “We have to take him to a Vet.”

  We drove to the nearest good vet, but it was packed. There was only one doctor and she had only a few people at her aid. There were four more pets ahead in line which had been brought from an animal shelter in a caged van.

  We asked around and found that shelter had a fire accident which had injured those dogs. We waited there for three hours, in which one of the assisting aids did some basic check-up on Dino.

  The vet’s clinic also didn’t look very well. There was no proper maintenance of the place, and it looked more like a cheap government hospital.

  Finally, our turn came, and we took Dino inside. The Vet was still managing to keep her cool in the middle of a crisis. She said, “Playing rough, are we?” and ruffled Dino’s fur.

  Dino whined in a low voice. She gave an injection to him and applied a bandage to the gash area after applying an ointment. Dino held my hand in pain as I distracted him, “Who is a good boy? Huh? It will be alright; you are a brave one, aren’t you?”

  “All done, he is as good as new,” the Vet said, she looked at Dino’s face and continued in a baby voice, “and you will come back for a check-up in a week.”

  I made up my mind as I was coming out of the clinic. I will make a shelter and clinic of my own for them, which will not have these problems. I owed it to Jackie and Dino.

  ~*~

  I had hopped on to an auto rickshaw to reach Bedrock. I couldn’t believe I forgot all about it. It was the most passionate project for me back then. My love for dogs had transcended into setting it up. Aditi had helped me throughout the set up from the first step till the last. She had contributed a lot more than me, and I felt like shit forgetting all about the dogs, and the place. My life was so screwed up that I forgot all the fine things about it. Now all the memories regarding the place rushed towards me like an old best friend.

  “What will be the name of the place?” I asked.

  “Dumbo, that’s the easiest part. Think Flintstones!” Aditi replied cheerfully.

  “Fred?”

  “Are you retarded? Bedrock!”

  “Damn, that suits so well. We already have our Dino. Why not we design his room with Dino’s pictures on the wall?”

  She agreed whole-heartedly. “There will be a small kiddie pool where the puppies can chill and relax during summers.”

  “We will have an open ground covered with a fence all around so that all of them can roam and live free.”

  “And we will have first aid kits and some attendants. We have to appoint a caretaker also, who manages the place when both of us are busy.”

  I scoffed. “The way we love dogs; I don’t think that we would ever leave it.”

  They were my words, and see what has happened now. I had forgotten all about the place. After Shikha’s death, I had stopped living and didn’t care about anything else. I used to visit the place with Shikha at least once a week before.

  “There is a different glow on your face every time we are here,” she remarked looking at my over joyous face.

  I kissed her. “This is my second home.”

  I threw a ball, and little Dino jumped towards it. His brown tail wagging continuously, and his white paws looked like small cute boots on his brown body.

  “Baby, let’s adopt a puppy at our home,” added Shikha.

  I smiled. “Nope, I don’t want these pups here to feel that I have neglected them, and I don’t want just one dog; I love all of them here.”

  Shikha held my hand. “You are a good man Mr. Rathore.”

  Time flew by whenever I was at Bedrock. I used to personally bid them good night. This was another thing which made this place unique. We had rooms filled with toys and beds for all the pups and dogs here. This one time, I had locked all of the rooms, and only the last one was left. Shikha opened the door and saw an empty room. A huge dinosaur poster adorned the wall.

  “Baby, this room is missing an owner.”

  My heart skipped a beat, and I rushed towards the room. To none of my surprise, it was Dino’s. He never liked sleeping in a locked room. He always used to escape the room and go outside near the pool with his favorite toy – a stuffed Dino from the Flintstones. I went out and saw the pup chewing the toy and wagging his tail.

  “DINO!”

  The pup looked at me with the cutest eyes and let out a small bark.

  WOOF!

  “Come here kid; it’s time to sleep.”

  He ran right towards me and zoomed past me through my legs making me look a fool.

  “Classic Dino,” I scoffed.

  Shikha let out a big laugh. “This dog will go places.”

  All I could remember was Dino and Aditi. I still remember when I was drowning in drinks that Aditi had tried to cheer me up and urged me to go there, but I didn’t budge.

  “It’s our Bedrock. You have to go there.”

  “Pass,” I whispered preparing another drink.

  “Stop drinking and think for once. Shikha would want you to start living your life.”

  “If she wanted me to live my life, then she shouldn’t have left me alone.”

  “There are others that love you. Bedrock is our responsibility. We have to take care of them.”

  “I have no respo
nsibilities, and I will stop paying the rent now. All of the dogs are better off without me,” I barked.

  Aditi slapped me. “You would have no qualms in wasting all the money on your drinking, right?”

  “Yes! I have stopped caring for others now.”

  Aditi took a deep breath. “Don’t you want to see our Dino? He is all grown up now.”

  “I can’t care less about him,” I replied, finishing my drink in one gulp.

  “You are a changed man Arjun. I regret loving you once.”

  I scoffed. “I regret knowing you.”

  ~*~

  There was a sudden screeching sound as the auto came to a halt. I was glad that those memories vanished, otherwise, I would have killed myself with all the guilt. I had finally reached my destination. Bedrock was right in front of me. I checked my watch. It was quarter past midnight. The road was stranded, and the place was locked.

  “I missed you Bedrock!”

  I tiptoed my way to the backyard as there would be no guards around, and I could easily sneak in inside. I saw the swimming pool and reminisced about my old times where I watched the dogs enjoying themselves in the pool. It was heaven on earth. I couldn’t believe that Bedrock was in a dilapidated state. Suddenly, I saw a pair of green eyes staring at me from a kennel nearby the pool.

  “Who is this?” I asked gently.

  I knew that it was a dog as I could hear the growling. The dog was angry as hell as he ground his teeth against each other. I was in deep trouble judging by his anger.

  “You must be a good boy.”

  The backyard was completely dark. I was fighting blind. I couldn’t see him, and he had his eyes fixed on me. I tried to back off a little, but I stepped on a twig by mistake which made a creaking sound.

  Woof! Woof! Woof!

  The barks were getting angrier which triggered the howls and barks from the street dogs as well. I was relieved that no one had heard this ruckus. Finally, the dog launched towards me.