Take Me to Bed: A Collection of Naughty Bedtime Stories

by Michelle Windsor

  There seemed to always be four or more topics being discussed at once. The family spoke loudly, cursed freely, and parried verbal jousts with clever and witty quips. It was very overwhelming.

  Sam wondered if she could slip outside without being noticed. Perhaps she should go look for Braydon. Rather than play the coward, she stiffened her shoulders and stepped into the melee.

  “Good morning.”

  Like a record scratching, all mouths stopped moving and the sound of silverware and dishes clattering was silenced. Approximately twenty eyes turned toward her.

  With wide eyes she slowly raised her hand and finger-waved. “Hi. I’m Sam.”

  Everyone said his or her own version of hello at once. Sam didn’t catch a single name that was thrown at her. Maureen stood and bustled over to the cabinets. Kelly slid down and offered her a seat at the long bench they all shared. The redheaded woman Sam assumed was Katherine lifted the toddler off her lap and told the three children to go play.

  Sam sat next to Kelly and watched as he loaded enough food to feed a village on the plate Maureen placed in front of her. Realizing Braydon’s brother wasn’t going to cease until the food spilled over the edge, she stilled his hand and whispered to him that was enough. Everyone at the table smiled at her and she fought the impulse to check that nothing was in her hair or on her face.

  She cleared her throat. “Has anyone seen Braydon?”

  “He took a ride out to check a fence for me. Should be back soon,” the older man said. He had to have been Mr. McCullough. He looked just like Braydon’s brothers. They all shared the same blue eyes and strong jaw. Although the twins had a lighter brown hair compared to Mr. McCulloughs and Kelly’s black, it was clear they were all related. It was interesting that Braydon was the only member of the family with golden hair and fairer features.

  “I’m sorry I interrupted all of you. I’ll just eat and get out of your way.”

  “Don’t be silly, dear. You’re our guest for the next two weeks and we won’t have you hiding away from us. Best you get comfortable with us as quickly as possible. That way when someone upsets you, you’ll have no problem setting them straight. We’ve got a tough lot here and best you show them you’re no shying violet from the start.”

  Sheilagh stood and carried her plate to the sink. “You’re gonna scare her, Mum.”

  “No, Samantha’s tough. I’ve faith in her. She can handle herself. Can’t you, dear?”

  Clueless of what a proper reply would be, Sam smiled and took a sip of her juice. If she hadn't immediately liked the McCulloughs so much she’d probably label them all crazy. She focused on eating her breakfast while each family member took their turn introducing themselves.

  Katherine was indeed the other redhead. Older than the rest, but still beautiful and vibrant. Sam was quickly realizing all McCulloughs were. She had red hair to her shoulders and bangs that covered her forehead yet always seemed to part in the center. She was the type of woman that pulled off natural as if it were an art. Wearing no makeup that Sam could detect, her ears didn’t appear pierced, and the only jewelry she wore was a gold Claddagh wedding band. She also was very pregnant.

  The twins seemed the most reserved of the bunch, but perhaps that was because it was still early and they weren’t quite awake yet. Finn left the kitchen soon after Sam sat down so she hadn’t gotten an opportunity to analyze him yet. Braydon was right. They were identical. What he failed to mention was that they were both off the charts gorgeous.

  Luke appeared respectful yet careless. There was something guarded about his posture and the set of his eyes. All through breakfast he wore a short brimmed hat that reminded Sam of a paperboy from the turn of the century. It made his ethnicity all the more apparent and he kept the hat pulled low over his eyes. This brother was the one Braydon said lost his chance at being a professional athlete. He definitely had the body of an athlete. Yet there was something mysterious about him she couldn’t quite figure out. Other than a short hello, he said nothing to Sam and very little to anyone else.

  Mr. McCullough, who insisted Sam call him Frank, was polite and quiet. Sam supposed being married to a woman like Maureen, didn’t leave much to be said at the end of the day.

  He wore a red flannel, blue jeans, and faded yellow work boots. Realizing she had imagined what Frank McCullough looked like, he fit the acceptable logger image her mind subconsciously preordained.

  And then there was Sheilagh. No wonder she had a reputation of being somewhat of a wild child. Even sitting next to her was intimidating. She was so beautiful it almost defied what Sam thought acceptable for normal people who weren’t airbrushed supermodels. Sam fought the urge to keep staring at her in search of at least one flaw. In her glances she found none.

  Sheilagh had bright green eyes, the same color of Maureen and Katherine’s. Her lips looked naturally made up, as if she was eating berries and the juice permanently stained them. The youngest McCullough was like a thistle flower, beautiful and tempting, but impossible to hold without being cut.

  The sound of a car pulling up the gravelly drive followed by a car door slamming filtered into the kitchen. A dog barked and Katherine went to the door.

  “It’s about time!” She smiled as she pushed open the screen door at the back of the kitchen, her belly filling most of the entrance.

  Braydon stepped in and Sam silently sighed with mild relief at his return.

  “Beautiful Kate. How are you?”

  He hugged his sister with unguarded affection and she whispered something in his ear that made him flush and smile. When the siblings separated Braydon placed a hand on his sister’s belly.

  “Another boy, eh?”

  Katherine smiled and cradled her protruding belly. “I’m fighting to get you a namesake, but Ant says Braydon Marcelli just sounds ethnically wrong.”

  “Well, that’s what you get for marrying an Italian.”

  A dog scratched at the screen and Katherine leaned past Braydon to let it inside the house. It was a mangy looking beast with gray brown wiry hair. Sam tried not to react outwardly when she noticed it only had three legs.

  “Here you are, Rufus,” Maureen called as she dropped scraps into a metal bowl on the floor. The dog hobbled over and gratefully nibbled at the trimmings.

  Braydon kissed his mother on her rosy cheek than moved over to Sam and did the same before sitting next to her on the bench.

  Leaning close he whispered to Sam, “How are you this morning?”

  “Good. Where’d you go? I would’ve gone with you.”

  “I had to go check something at the end of the property for my dad. If you want to go out later to see the land I’ll take you.”

  He began to eat as the rest of the family returned to the table with mugs of coffee. Frank was perusing the local paper. Kelly drifted back upstairs, and Luke disappeared shortly after Braydon returned. The children played across the foyer in what Sam assumed was the den. Katherine questioned Braydon about his recently completed semester at school and he quizzed her on his nieces and nephew’s recent achievements.

  “Are we having a game today?” Braydon asked to no one in particular.

  “Aye. We’re meeting at two. Colleen and Rosemarie have already each called this morning to see if you got in okay.”

  Braydon smiled and turned to Sam. “They’re my aunts. You’ll meet them today and the rest of my cousins. We always start the summer with an opening game of baseball.”

  A ball game. That’d be fun to watch. Sam tried not to get overwhelmed at the idea of more family. These were busy people, lots of offspring. Sam thought it charming the way the family pronounced Colleen as C’leen and Rosemarie as Ross-mer-ree.

  The conversation lazed in and out of topics from which wooded areas Frank’s company was recently clearing to the family’s overall opinion on Finn’s recent breakup. Through it all Maureen steadily set the kitchen back to rights and finally joined the others at the table to relax. The small toddler, Hannah, returned t
o Katherine’s lap and napped in her mother’s arms using her soon-to-arrive little brother as a pillow.

  When the screen door opened again Sam almost choked on the coffee slipping down her throat. It was the man from the bathroom with the sapphire eyes flecked with jade. He greeted Braydon first and then turned directly to her.

  “Hello, I’m Colin.”

  She took his hand. “Sam.”

  “Samantha’s Braydon’s friend from college. She’ll be staying with us for the next three weeks,” Maureen informed.

  “Wonderful,” Colin remarked as he gave her hand a slight squeeze.

  She didn’t understand her disappointment at the loss of contact. Obviously she was the immature one, for where Colin kindly decided to forget her humiliating blunder this morning and be a gentleman to his brother’s friend, she could not help imagining him naked. When he shook her hand it was formal and without emotion beyond appropriate politeness. The way it should be. Yet for some reason this irritated her.

  He moved to the counter and poured himself a cup of coffee then took a seat next to Katherine. Running an affectionate hand down Hannah’s sleeping head, he smiled.

  What was it Sam noticed in his expression? Not quite longing, but perhaps some sort of resigned acceptance. There was definitely love in the gesture, but something more. This man, for some reason, stood apart from the rest.

  “How was Mass?” Frank asked as he dumped the remainder of his coffee down the drain and stashed his newspaper in a wooden crate of old papers.

  “It was fine. I spoke to Father Newsham about moving the later Sunday Mass back an hour since they dropped the Saturday Mass. I don’t think he was fond of the idea until I pointed out that a later crowd could possibly bring younger parishioners.”

  “Lord knows Kelly hasn’t been to Mass since they moved it to nine a.m.”

  Colin chuckled. “Well, Kelly’s a proud heathen. I was thinking more about the kids Sheilagh’s age.”

  “I’ll remind you I am now a legal adult,” Sheilagh told Colin pointedly. “And I never miss Sunday service. However, I’d appreciate being able to sleep in a little longer.”

  As they spoke Sam couldn’t resist watching the oldest McCullough brother. He had a soft yet strong voice. His teeth were perfectly white and straight and now that his hair was combed he displayed a level of refinement the rest of the family lacked. He was devastatingly handsome in a classic way, a cross between a sexy Clark Kent or Gable. He seemed a distinguished gentleman, sure and confident.

  “Is you’re family Catholic?” Maureen asked Samantha drawing her back into the conversation.

  “Um, I have all my sacraments, but we haven’t practiced in quite a few years.”

  Maureen and the others accepted her honesty without judgment. She turned back to watch Colin some more when Maureen proudly announced, “Colin is finishing his Transitional Diaconate this summer. In August he’s becoming a priest.”

  3

  After an afternoon of driving around the McCullough property with Braydon, Samantha was completely in love with the land. They parked and explored a trail that led to a natural spring and she was stunned when Braydon took a metal cup tied to a post in the ground and scooped out a sample and swallowed it. The watering hole was edged in moss and freezing cold. When he kindly bullied her into tasting it she was amazed at how refreshing the spring water was on her tongue.

  They passed a corral by the edge of the five hundred acre property where horses grazed. Braydon informed her that most McCulloughs learned how to ride before they properly mastered the art of walking. Samantha had never ridden a horse before, but was determined to try before she returned home.

  There was a cleared piece of land high up on a mountain that had a windmill. She’d always known the contraptions were big, but compared to what she imagined they were colossal. Because windmills were government owned in Center County, this was another source of income for the McCulloughs. All they had to do was sign the papers agreeing that the county could use their property and they were sent a check quarterly for their civic duty.

  Growing up in the more affluent suburbs of Pennsylvania and the Jersey areas across the Delaware River where people struggled to obtain even an acre of land, Sam was blown away by how much property the McCulloughs owned. It was too enormous to completely explore in one afternoon alone. It made her sad for the ruthless commercialization that no doubt would someday rob the secret place of its beauty. Hopefully the McCulloughs would never let their land go.

  They parked to observe a black bear claw the surface of a small stream for fish when Braydon shut off the truck and gave the engine a rest.

  “Will the bear be bothered by us being so close?”

  “Not so long as we stay in the car. That’s one thing about being this high on the trail. You’ve got to be real careful about being out on foot. There’re all kinds of things bigger than you out here. Not to mention more pitfalls than I can list along the trail. You also have to know when people are hunting on the property.”

  “Do you let others use your property for hunting season?”

  “We have a cabin up that mountain there. It’s pretty isolated and primitive. No phones or cable. There’s a radio you can call out from in case of emergencies, but that’s about it. We let some family friends borrow it from time to time, but other than that, no, we don’t let people treat our home as public gaming land.”

  “When you told me you were from the mountains I never imagined anything as magnificent as this.”

  The bear, which was hardly more than a partially grown cub, moved down stream toward the rougher waters. Just past the bend of the stream were large moss covered boulders. The incline of the land created a slight waterfall where rapids fell like white foam into the calmer pools closer to where Sam and Braydon watched.

  “Do they swim?”

  “When they fall in. Sometimes I catch the cubs playing in the shallower parts.”

  The cub cautiously traveled over the falls, balancing on rocks that jetted out of the surface. His head moved back and forth as he tracked his fast swimming prey.

  He was adorable, his big paws swiping deep, the mist coating his brownish nose and black fur. It shook like a large dog trying to dry off. For as cute as the cub was Sam was smart enough to resist the temptation of getting any closer. She’d heard stories of mother bear instincts and even if momma bear wasn’t around, baby bear had claws the size of bananas.

  Sam gasped as the bear jumped into the water. It looked down for a split second then plunged its head under water and came up with a fish. At first it took the fish over to a rock and held it with amazing dexterity as it flopped back and forth. Once the fish stilled the bear pranced off to dryer land, lunch in its mouth, and scurried up the trunk of a tall pine.

  She smiled at Braydon. “That may have been one of the neatest things I’ve ever seen in person.”

  “He gave you a good show for a first timer.”

  He leaned across the seat and kissed her. She hadn’t been expecting a kiss, but didn’t have the heart to stop him. It was more intimate than a friendly peck, but less sexual than what she expected from him. Again, she wondered at the strange bridge of being just friends they couldn’t seem to smoothly cross.

  “I’m glad you like it here.”

  “What’s not to like? It’s amazing. You’re very lucky to have grown up here.”

  “It was a fun place to be a kid,” he agreed. “We better head back if we’re gonna make the game. Do you need to grab anything from the house before we head to the field?”

  “I don’t think so. It’s not like I’m playing.”

  He chuckled. “Fair warning, they’re gonna make you play.”

  * * *

  The baseball field was only about a fifteen-minute drive over the mountain. It actually was closer than Sam assumed, but because they were traveling down rough terrain they maintained a speed of less than fifteen miles per hour for most of the trip.

  With what she
already saw of the McCulloughs, Samantha should’ve expected a traditional field complete with two dugouts and stadium style bleachers, but she was still surprised when they pulled up.

  “Is this still McCullough property?”

  “Yup.” Braydon parked the truck by the fence facing first base. “We have a league with my Aunt Rosemarie’s bar so it made sense for us to have an open field for practice. Colin brings some of the kids from the youth center here from time to time as well.”

  The mention of Colin brought thoughts Samantha had been ignoring all afternoon to the forefront of her mind.

  “How long’s your brother known he wanted to be a priest?”

  “Since college, maybe before then. I’m not really sure. I was a conceited twelve-year-old when he left for university. I think he told the family that winter when he came home for Christmas.”

  “Didn’t he have to go to a special school for that?”

  “Yeah, he goes to seminary at Saint Peter’s, not too far from where we are in the city. That’s where he lives usually. I think what he’s doing now, this Transitional Diaconate period, is like an enforced time of reflection before he takes his vows.”

  Doing quick math in her head, Sam discerned that Colin was almost thirty. The minute Maureen announced he was becoming a priest Samantha was certain she was going to hell. Not thirty seconds before the proud announcement, Sam was picturing the man naked and begging her imagination to make him drop the towel.

  Worse, after the revelation of his holy rank, her dirty mind couldn’t help imagining him like a Chippendale dancer, but instead of a bowtie, he wore a priest’s collar. Yes, she was definitely going to hell.

  They walked through the lot of cars she recognized from the house and some she did not. Katherine was sitting beside her mother and father. Her children were running around on the grassy part of the field. Sam was relieved to see members of the family sitting in the bleachers. Perhaps she wouldn’t be expected to play after all.

  As they crossed the threshold marked by an opening in the chain link fence surrounding the field, Sheilagh yelled, “Finally, we can pick teams. Jen and I are captains.”