Black Mesa Wolves Complete Series Boxset Bks 1-7

by J. K Harper

  Her general way of holding herself in a constant state of alertness against the world—a world that she had learned at a young age was definitely not always fair—automatically tipped up her chin, although she kept herself loose and relaxed as she regarded him. But now that everyone else was gone, she didn't necessarily have to have such a stranglehold on the truth of the matter.

  She decided to name the elephant in the room. Or, more accurately, the one in the open grounds behind the house, filled with the wild hints of the forest in the mountains beyond that, along with Jace's scent, stirred her wolf even more. She got up again and began to pace in Caitlin's mind, though she still kept Jace within her sights through Caitlin's eyes.

  Yearning.

  Absolutely not. Caitlin had managed her unexpectedly maternal life thus far by being cool and collected, and always thinking. That wasn't going to change now. No matter what. Taking a deep breath to settle her nerves, she closed her eyes for a moment to gather her composure again. Opening them to award him a calm look, she took the bull by the horns.

  "So," she replied, echoing his word as well as his tone. Against her will, the corner of her mouth tilted up just a fraction. “Apparently I've been waiting for you all my life, right?” Startled at her own unexpected words, she let out a soft, “Oh!” She hadn't meant to loosen up quite that much.

  But he huffed out a bit of surprised laughter at her sudden joking, and she relaxed even more. Curiouser and curiouser. She'd met the guy barely ten minutes ago, yet he already could soothe her with barely a sound. Maybe it was a mate thing.

  Shoving down the highly rational part of her mind as it tried to freak out again at the concept that the man standing in front of her was her mate, Caitlin kept looking at him. It sure wasn't hard, given the fact that quite frankly he was gorgeous. Dark, close-cropped hair with glints of gold in it from some lighter brown strands here and there. Stubble on his chin and cheeks that she wanted to rub against with her face.

  For heaven's sake. Were her panties actually getting damp?

  Caitlin's face flamed.

  Jace crossed his arms over his chest. He stood centered and balanced on the balls of his feet, slight smile still on his face. She knew the stance. It was how all Guardians tended to carry themselves. Always prepared to fight if necessary, to protect their pack. Always on alert for many dangers. Despite the hint of what might be called aggression visible merely by the way he carried himself, she sensed something else. There was a quietness, a calmness to him that called to her, settled her in a way she found both comforting and irritating.

  Comforting because all the thoughts and emotions spinning around inside her were pretty confusing at the moment. Irritating because it didn't jive with her initial impression of him as the kind of guy who just wasn't ready for the realities of life.

  Like wolf pups. Two of them. And not his.

  “That's what I've always been told,” he said. “Meet your mate, settle down, live happily ever after. That's about the gist of it, I think.” She couldn't help but let her gaze drop to his mouth as he spoke. For one crazy second, she entertained the notion of what those lips might feel like against hers.

  Oh, no. Redirect. Fast. "We just met. I don't know you at all. You weren't even here the last time I visited." She lifted one eyebrow at him. “You could be a serial killer for all I know."

  Oh, brilliant. Perhaps that was a little off-the-wall.

  "Don't think the pack would have let me on as a Guardian if that were the case," he said, lips twitching. He was enjoying this little repartee. “Got anything else?” Navy blue eyes scattered with flecks of sapphire regarded her as calmly and directly as her words.

  Feeling uncharacteristically flustered, she kept talking without thinking. "I have two children."

  Oh, even more brilliant. Go for the obvious information.

  Her wolf huffed again.

  This time, he laughed outright. It was so spontaneous, so fun, that she couldn't help but breathe out a tiny laugh of her own. She sounded ridiculous and she knew it.

  "I definitely noticed the children," he said, the deep timbre of his voice shivering along her skin. He reached down to rub his calf just a bit. "I think I'll hold off on shifting just so I do have a little bit of a scar. It'll be fun to play with young Liam that way. Make him regret attacking his elders like that."

  The corners of his eyes crinkled up as he smiled in earnest. Caitlin felt her heart do a funny little tripping thing. Even so, she relaxed more at his smile. He just felt so—safe.

  "You were pretty good with them," she admitted. "They are definitely wild little hooligans sometimes." She knew a dreamy smile blossomed over her face at that, but she didn't bother to squash it. She was an adoring mother who was thoroughly in love with her own children. Trying to hide her love for them was useless. "Everyone at home knows how to handle them, but sometimes they get a little out of hand when we visit other packs."

  His smile fell away. The navy eyes suddenly darkened even more, edging toward a sable black. Caitlin's wolf paused in her pacing. What had she just said?

  "You visit other packs often?" His voice was suddenly gruff, and the crinkles had left the corners of his eyes.

  Thoroughly confused now, Caitlin felt her back ruffle a bit. She knew that tone quite well. She hadn't been raised with an alpha for a father and an alpha for a brother for nothing. "I do have friends in other packs, yes," she answered, narrowing her eyes a touch. "Why do you ask?"

  In general, Caitlin had been direct her entire life. It was something that always served her well, and she wasn't about to stop now. Not even for her—mate. Especially not for her mate. Her mind reeled again at that thought, even as her wolf rubbed against the sides of her mind in obstinate approval.

  Jace took a deep breath and blew it out again before answering. "Well." He paused for a moment, looking at her with such sudden solemnity that Caitlin felt her own breath catch in her throat. "What about the pups' father? You're clearly not mated. I would know that. Is he the one you visit when you go to other packs?"

  All shifters could recognize mated wolves as well as unmated ones. Caitlin wasn't sure if she should be relieved or further offended at his words. "No," she said, hearing her tone sharpen. "No, I am not mated. And the twins' father is—" she paused. "Now, hang on just a minute. Maybe Kieran was right to throw his big brother fit. Is this really any of your business?"

  Jace's arms uncrossed to drop down to his sides. He leaned forward, pinning her with the eyes she felt like she could fall into. "Yes, it's a perfectly reasonable question. Seeing as how you and I are mates. "

  Caitlin stood there, staring at Jace as it felt like all the air in her chest suddenly fled in the face of that wild, crazy, inescapable truth.

  4

  Jace's heart beat hard inside him as he and Caitlin faced off.

  Jace's wolf would not stop pacing. He circled and tread across Jace's mind, keeping a close eye on Caitlin while Jace just stood there, staring at her like a big—well, a big dumb-dumb. Now that everyone else was gone, and she'd apparently decided to strike right at the heart of whatever madness was going on here, he felt something he hadn't felt in a very long time.

  Nervousness. Pure nerves. Making him edgy and tight.

  The breeze rustled again, bringing Caitlin's sweet citrusy scent to him. His wolf was strongly impressing upon him the need to simply stride over to her, gather her up in his arms, and kiss her senseless.

  Yeah, he thought, unable to rip his eyes away from her clear green ones. Because that's just exactly the right way to approach a woman. I just smack her over her head, throw her over my shoulder, and carry her off to my den like she's a sack of treasure?

  Den, his wolf agreed, picturing Jace's new small home on the pack property. Yes, mate and pups should be at den. Better to protect.

  Only Jace's training kept his internal struggle from showing on his face, or by an unwitting move or word. Despite that, it was as if Caitlin could sense it anyway. She swallow
ed as the delicate flush rose in her cheeks. Jace felt his pulse leap as he tracked the way her throat muscles worked when she swallowed. The way her flush lightly spread down her neck and over her chest, disappearing into the V-neck of the pretty light blue shirt she wore. The one that hugged her as closely as he wished he could.

  Mate. The way his wolf said the word shot through Jace again, crackling through his body. Damn it all to hell. Fine. His mate. If she was woman enough to address the topic head-on, well, then, he was man enough to do the same.

  "So. Your pups have a father. Where is he?” So I can take him out, the surprising thought flashed with grim intent through his mind. He wasn't sure if it was his human side or his wolf.

  Both, he decided.

  As he watched, Caitlin's face suddenly underwent a mesmerizing ricochet of different emotions. Wariness, yes. But also pride, confusion, a flare of pain, and even a small flash of what he thought might be anger. When she answered, her husky voice rippled through him, once again sending little electrical shocks through his body.

  Chin unconsciously tipping up, she said in a somewhat defiant tone, "The twins' father is not in our lives. So he is not a concern of yours."

  The challenge was implicit. Jace felt walloped by two things simultaneously. One, relief. There wasn't another wolf standing in his way.

  Two, another blast of trepidation. Because there wasn't another wolf standing in his way. She was his to claim. But he had little to offer a mate. This had to be the worst timing ever. He had just gotten his new chance at a good life. Now he was presented with a mate? And a mate who already had pups?

  His head hurt.

  His wolf whined in his mind, still pushing hard for Jace to come to his senses and move closer to Caitlin. Jace used every ounce of his inner strength to stand firm in the face of his wilder side's deepest desire.

  "Well," he said finally, choosing what seemed like the safest tactic he could think of, "then I'd say you've done a damn fine job of raising those pups on your own, Caitlin." He couldn't help it. The way he said her name came out in a far more seductive tone than he planned.

  She definitely heard it. Her flush didn't deepen, but she caught her lower lip between her teeth for just a moment before releasing it again. Its soft plumpness glistened at him like a homing beacon. Jace swallowed.

  "I—thank you," she said. She looked at him steadily. The wariness was still there, as was the confusion, but she seemed less likely to flee right now. Or bite his head off, which was perhaps another option. "Don't think just because he's not in our lives, just because you're my—mate," she stumbled over the word, "means that you can waltz right in and take over the position. It doesn't exactly work that way. You don't have kids of your own, do you?"

  "No." Jace kept his voice flat, hoping she wouldn't ask more about that. But she caught something else underlying his tone. Damn. She was his mate, but as they weren't actually mated yet, they didn't share the true mate bond. Even so, it seemed that within the space of about twenty minutes, she could already read him better than almost any other wolf he'd ever met.

  No wonder all his friends who ended up mated always told him it was the craziest, wildest ride of their lives.

  Her cool, beautiful face softened a fraction. "Did you ever want them?" Her voice was gentle, though her gaze stayed intent.

  Jace briefly debated how to answer that. He settled on the harsh truth. "No. I don't have the first idea of how to be a father.” He couldn't help but add, "Your little stinkers are pretty damn cute, though. I'll give them that."

  A startled laugh burbled out of Caitlin's mouth. Her face lit up again. Once more, he was struck by her beauty and her authenticity. Without a doubt, he was looking at the real Caitlin in this moment. Not merely a protective wolf mama, or the woman who obviously had been hurt by having some idiot not want to be in the lives of her and her children. No, he could sense he was seeing the whole package right now. No matter how insane it was, no matter how truthful he was being when he said that he just wasn't father material, he desperately wanted to get to know her better.

  Faced with that gorgeous smile, his own emotions whipping through him, his wolf yearning to get close to her, Jace uncharacteristically blurted out the only thing he could think of. "You're right, Caitlin. I sure as hell didn't start my day expecting to meet my mate. Especially didn't expect to meet a mate who already has pups. And I'm not ready to be anyone's daddy.”

  He cool, beautiful face stayed impassive. Did he maybe see a glint of regret in her eyes? His wolf argued in his mind, pawing and growling as Jace fought his baser instincts.

  The instincts telling him to claim his mate.

  Desperate to not do something stupid, hearing the roughness of his voice, he ground out, “I know this is completely insane for both of us. I'm going to be damn honest with you right now, Caitlin.” Despite his internal battle to control it, he knew sudden desire flooded into his face as the next words ripped out of him. “I really want to kiss those sexy lips of yours so long and so hard you'll come up gasping for air."

  Caitlin's mouth slowly dropped open as he talked, her smile and laughter vanishing abruptly. In their place, though, he saw pure, naked longing. It made him tremble with effort of not doing what he'd just said.

  "But I'm a gentleman. Unfortunately.” He huffed out a self-deprecating laugh at that. “And you have pups, and I don't want pups,” he made himself reiterate, despite how cruel he knew it sounded, “and I don't know what else to do here right now. So I'm going to walk away. Because otherwise I'm definitely going to kiss you, and I know you want me to. Your wolf wants me to kiss you, my wolf wants me to kiss you.”

  He paused to shake his head once, roughly. Caitlin's green eyes swam in front of him, threatening to devour him with their beautiful depths.

  “But. You have children. I have a new life here that I just started. So this is crazy,” he said, voice low, literally taking a step back. A step away from her. “We both need time to figure out what this all means."

  With an enormous effort, pushing down with all his might against the wolf howling inside him, he turned toward the den, walking toward it as swiftly as he could.

  The worst part was the actual sensation of pain as he walked away from Caitlin Rendall.

  Breath churning, he picked up the pace until he was almost running so he didn't have to feel the weight of her gaze on him any longer. So he could get away from the one impossible, baffling, overly complicated thing he'd never thought would appear in his life: his mate.

  5

  Caitlin took another lazy sip of coffee, enjoying the rich aroma and the even more potent taste. She sat on the front deck of Lily's and Kieran's snug house on the den property, enjoying the excellent views of the Black Mesa Pack grounds tumbling off in all directions. The forest, filled with hearty ponderosas and blue spruce with their spreading limbs, waved up the side of what were first hills and then mountains rising west of the den. Rolling down before her was an expanse of green space, both small meadows and a few training fields, all the way to the main den building, where she and the pups had been ensconced in their very nice quarters for the past week.

  They had breakfast with Lily and Kieran almost every morning, either here or in the den. So far, it had been an almost perfect week of spending time with her brother and his mate, exploring more of the nearby canyon country landscapes of Colorado that the twins weren't as accustomed to in their more mountainous home to the north, and relaxing away from her duties to her own pack.

  It had also been a week filled with assiduous avoidance of Jace Canagan and his insanely kissable lips. Not, of course, that she had kissed them. She had no idea if they genuinely were kissable. They just looked like it. Not that she had thought about that.

  A lot. Every day.

  Then there were his arms. Strong and defined with the sleek muscles of someone who worked out often, they seemed just right to sink into and be held by. She knew she would find him wildly appealing even without the ma
te thing humming between them like a live wire. And, of course, there was his ruggedly attractive face, which kept drifting through her mind about, oh, every few minutes or so. Thick, dark eyebrows lent definition to his deep indigo eyes, making him look determined, calm, and creative all at once. Caitlin sensed a depth in him that he kept concealed from others. But for her, he had let it show. Just a bit.

  It made her feel special. And serenely comfortable. Until, of course, he walked away from her almost the second after he met her.

  Which was what men did.

  But if he walked away, and if I don't even know him, she mused for the thousandth time in the past seven days, then how can he feel so much like—home?

  Her wolf, as lazy as Caitlin this morning, rolled over in her mind. Mate, she said sleepily. Mate always means home. Her tone suggested that Caitlin still wasn't right in the head for not yet recognizing that.

  Blowing out a breath of air, partially to cool the coffee and partially as a sigh, Caitlin just nodded to herself. Sure. It was that easy.

  Right.

  There was one major, unexpected obstacle to avoiding him and his electrifying presence. The pups were utterly enamored of him. They shadowed his every footstep, had started to imitate his way of talking, which thankfully didn't seem to involve any more swear words, and basically begged Caitlin every single morning to see him. In their eyes, he was fun simply because he actually paid attention to them. Lots of adult wolves truly adored pack pups and spent focused time with them, and of course all wolves watched out for pups no matter what. But Jace seemed just as enchanted with her children as they with him. She knew it astounded him probably more than her.

  He'd said he didn't want kids. But it seemed he happened to genuinely enjoy hers.

  First thing the day after their inauspicious meeting, Liam and Briana had asked Caitlin if they could see Jace. “Please, mama? I want to see if he really does have a scar now.” Liam's eyes had been big as he said that. For once, Caitlin knew he wasn't just trying to finagle something to go his way. He was truly a little worried.