This time it was my turn to laugh. “Insufferable, I think.”
Lee shook his head, hands moving to my belt, undoing it with slow, measured movements. “I don’t think so,” he said, flicking the button of my fly open and then running his thumb up and down the length of the zipper, making me squirm under the pressure on my half-hard cock.
“I think,” he said, resting his forehead against mine, surrounding me with the familiar scent he left on his pillow in the morning. “That you’ve been the best boyfriend I’ve ever had and I didn’t even need to have sex with you to get you to be that way.”
Oh, Lee.
Sex wasn’t supposed to be payment for kindness. Sad as my romantic history was, even I knew that.
“You still don’t,” I said. “I’d settle for a nice long cuddle.”
And I would have. Not even settle, I would have enjoyed every minute of it because what I wanted was for Lee to be happy. Whatever made him that way would make me happy.
“You would, wouldn’t you?” Lee asked, kissing the tip of my nose. “You’d let me sit here in your lap and fall asleep and you wouldn’t even try to move me.”
“I wouldn’t,” I promised. “You can. If you want to.”
Lee hummed, kissing the corner of my mouth. His spot.
“Haven’t gotten laid in five months,” he said, nuzzling his way to my ear. “Want you.”
A shiver started at the back of my neck and rolled down my spine. Lee could have said that a hundred times and I would never have gotten tired of hearing it.
“I’m all yours.”
“I know.” He sat back, grinning at me, one hand sliding into my hair and the other going back to my zipper. All I could do was stare at him, his eyes black and sparkling, lips kiss-bruised, hair all over the place.
He was beautiful, and I couldn’t believe I’d gotten this lucky.
“Take your pants off,” he said, darting in and pecking me on the lips. “I’m gonna get the lube.”
14
Lee
A low groan scratched the back of my throat as I finally sank down on Rowan’s cock, watching his eyes widen in awe as he looked up at me.
He was perfect. Shy and unsure of himself, but perfect all the same. Exactly what I needed.
“You feel good,” I gasped out between breaths, body still adjusting to the sudden fullness. It’d been a while, and I was definitely going to feel this in the morning.
“I do?” Rowan asked, hands hovering between us like he hadn’t decided where to touch first. I wished he’d make a goddamn decision, I needed his hands on me, warm and gentle and so eager. I’d forgotten what it was like to have someone excited to have sex with you, personally, instead of just the nearest warm body.
“You do,” I murmured, letting my eyes fall closed as our foreheads touched. Normally I’d sit back and ride him for all he was worth, but not Rowan. Him, I wanted to be close to. There was nothing in the world more valuable than being close to Rowan, being allowed to be close.
Tingles bloomed over my skin as he finally put a hand on my thigh, fingers sweeping up and down the length, easing trembling muscles.
Probably could’ve considered the whole day of rock climbing before I picked a position like this, but it was too late now, and I wanted him this way. Close enough to kiss and nuzzle and suck the salt off his skin.
A shudder ran through me as Rowan’s hand slid up, rounding the curve of my ass and slipping between my cheeks, fingertips brushing where we were joined together. My whole body jolted with a sudden shock of pleasure, pure physical need, my head spinning at the intensity.
Was he doing that on purpose? Did he know, or was he just curious?
“Good?” Rowan asked, uncertainty making his voice tremble.
“Good,” I agreed, licking sharp-salt sweat off his jaw, breathing in the scent I couldn’t get enough of, the one under everything he used to disguise it.
I didn’t think a whole lot of people got to be this up close and personal with him, and I wanted it all.
Tight, hot arousal pooled between my legs as Rowan explored my body with gentle hands, fingers sliding over the curves and grooves of my chest and stomach, running up and down my back, dipping down to play with my ass again, a shower of sparks rolling down my spine.
I wanted to keep still and let him touch me anywhere he thought of, but I needed more.
“I gotta…” I warned, moaning with relief as I rolled my hips, savoring the pressure and friction of his perfect cock sliding in and out of me. Rowan’s fingers tightened around my waist, digging in deep as I rocked again.
A shiver ran through him as I shoved my fingers deep into his hair, tipping his head back so I could kiss him and ride him at the same time. I wanted to memorize the taste of his mouth, etch it into my brain so I could always remember it. By the time we were done I wanted to be able to replay this in full surround sound and high definition, remember the salt of his skin.
I never took charge like this, but something about Rowan made me want to, and I couldn’t get enough of it. Every needy whimper and moan went straight to my cock, sparkling bursts of pleasure at knowing he was getting off on this, that I was getting him off.
Craig had used me, Rowan wanted me. That made all the difference in the world.
“You like that,” I murmured as I felt his hips jerk, grinding down against him and biting my lip as I found just the right angle, his cock hitting a spot that made me see stars.
“I like you,” Rowan panted between kisses, clinging tight to me now, like he was afraid I’d vanish if he didn’t.
I couldn’t stop kissing him. I loved the way he tasted, the way he moaned and whimpered as I rode him. His hands all over me, barely still, as though he was mapping every inch of my skin, seeking out sensitive places and making me gasp and hiss and groan as I rocked against him, harder and faster.
My thighs were on fire, but I didn’t care. All I could bring myself to care about right now was Rowan, and how good he felt, and how good he tasted and smelled and sounded, a bubble of happiness expanding in my chest, right under my ribcage, making it hard to breathe.
Sex hadn’t felt like this in a long time.
I hissed as my fingers curled around my oversensitive cock, hot, hard, and throbbing in my hand, sticky with precome. I’d wanted to last longer, but this round was just to take the edge off, wasn’t it?
Rowan had been shocked by the idea of going all night, so I was about to rock his world.
“Doin’ okay down there?” I murmured, nuzzling his jaw, letting my eyes fall closed again as I listened to him pant and gasp for breath, needy whimpers filling the air between us.
Rowan nodded, fingertips digging harder into my ass, pulling me down for more. Pressure built in the pit of my stomach, hot and urgent. He was letting me set the pace, take charge, take what I needed, and I couldn’t stop. Couldn’t even slow down.
“You wanna come, sweetheart?” I gasped, moaning as his cock skimmed something inside me that set a whole box of fireworks off in my brain.
Another nod, an audible swallow, his grip tightening again. The mattress creaked as I sped up, headboard groaning as I gripped it for leverage. I laughed into Rowan’s mouth at the thought of breaking the bed and having to explain ourselves in the morning, Rowan glowing bright pink the whole time.
That would have driven Craig nuts. We’d done a lot of things, but we’d never broken a bed.
But then, I’d never wanted him like this. Never wanted him, specifically, like this, never been so desperate to watch anyone else come apart as I was now, pulling back to look into Rowan’s eyes as I felt his hips stuttering under me, desperate to see the moment when he came, pleasure written all over his face.
“Little more,” I urged, hips bucking now as his cock hit the spot head-on with every thrust, crying out at the end of every breath as sparks of pleasure filled me up, burned in my thighs, pooled at the base of my cock even as I squeezed it to take the edge off.
&nbs
p; “That’s it, little more.”
I was so close now, right on the edge of coming, balls aching and blood rushing in my ears. Little more, little more.
“Want you to come for me,” I whispered in Rowan’s ear, grinding the head of my cock against his stomach and leaving a trail of precome, feeling him gasp and tense under me. “Come on.”
A low, rumbling groan welled up in Rowan’s chest, and I pulled back just in time to watch his orgasm play out over it, eyes screwed shut and mouth falling open as his whole body tensed under me. His back arched, and I could feel his cock throbbing as he finished, long waves of pleasure washing over him, stomach tensing, fingers digging so deep into my hips I’d have handprints there tomorrow.
A lightning bolt of pleasure hit me at the top of the spine, shuddering its way down, hips jerking as the first bright burst of pleasure spilled over. The room spun around me, eyes rolling back as I ground down hard, taking Rowan’s cock as deep as it could go and clenching tight around it, riding out wave after wave of pleasure, panting for breath between them like I was drowning.
Sticky and spent, I hovered for a few moments with a soft buzz in my ears, eyes closed, perfect contentment draped over me like a warm blanket on a cold night. Bliss.
When I looked down at Rowan again, he was staring up at me, mouth slack, eyes glazed, like I was the most incredible thing he’d ever seen.
Those butterflies he kept giving me came back with full force, throwing an impromptu rave in the pit of my stomach.
I watched with my own mouth hanging open as he ran his finger through the mess I’d made on his skin, then brought it to his mouth and licked a drop off his finger, absently, as though curiosity was just getting the better of him.
It was maybe the hottest thing I’d ever seen. Definitely in the top ten, with my ears still pounding and my thighs on fire and my whole body ready to collapse into the mattress and snuggle up next to him for a nice long nap before I even considered cleanup.
“God I hope you wanna do that again,” I sighed, tilting my head to brush our lips together, too exhausted for anything else.
“Now?” Rowan asked, voice rising in surprise.
“Oh fuck no,” I murmured, resting our foreheads together again. “Gimme a couple minutes, jeez.”
“I might need a little longer than that,” Rowan said, running his hand along my thigh. I hissed as it cramped up, protesting after a long day of overuse.
“Sore?” Rowan asked, hand stilling.
“Just a cramp,” I gritted out. This? This was not sexy, and I didn’t want him worrying about me. I could handle a little pain.
Rowan hummed, then pushed the heel of his hand deep into the flesh of my thigh. I gasped, eyes screwing shut at the spike of pain, and bit down on my lip.
“Shh,” Rowan soothed. “It’s all right. You’ll feel better once I’ve worked the knot out.”
I grunted as he pushed hard with his thumb, working a knot of muscle I could feel shifting under his touch, but I trusted him. Rowan wouldn’t have been trying this if he didn’t know what he was doing, and as he worked the sore muscle I could feel it loosening and loosening.
With a sudden rush of relief, the knot gave way and I moaned, loud enough that the people in the next cabin definitely heard me.
“Better?” Rowan asked gently, still stroking along my thigh.
My cock twitched in response, but he didn’t seem to notice it.
I was in so much trouble now. Before, I could shove the sudden surges of lust aside, tell myself that I couldn’t have Rowan so there was no point in wanting him, but now I could have him.
Poor Rowan was going to end up exhausted by the end of this cruise if I had my way. Happy, though. At least, I hoped I made him happy.
“Probably would have come again if you’d waited another few minutes,” I said.
“Is the other leg all right?” Rowan asked, pulling back to look me in the eyes, his pupils still blown, still swallowing up most of the ice-blue irises I liked more every time I looked at them.
“Other leg’s—oh my God,” I said, understanding what he was asking a moment too late. His eyes glittered with contained laughter as he smiled at me, and I wanted to bottle the full, sunshine-bright feeling in my chest and keep it with me always.
I could love you.
It was a terrifying thought, but I didn’t shove it aside quite as quickly as I might have. It was true—but then I could love anyone.
The thing about Rowan was that I was sure he wouldn’t use it against me. That he was safe to love.
Maybe I would fall in love with him. And maybe, if it happened, it’d be okay.
“This is a long way from not sleeping with strangers,” I said.
“You’re hardly a stranger,” Rowan murmured, still stroking up and down my thigh. If he kept this up he was going to find out all about my embarrassingly short recovery period. “I never said I didn’t like sex,” he continued. “Just that I like to know my partner first. And we have been sharing a bed for days now.”
I snorted, giving in to the constant urge to kiss him, running the tip of my tongue along his lower lip and tasting myself there, shifting my weight in his lap and gasping as his spent cock slipping out of me made me shiver all over.
“Still gotta write that thank you note to the company. Dear Cruise Line, thank you for giving me Rowan. He’s very clean and he’s got a great cock and a pretty smile I wish I got to see more often. Love, Lee.”
At this distance, I didn’t have to look at Rowan to know he was blushing—I could feel the heat of his face.
“Do you mean that?” Rowan asked.
“About your cock?”
“About my smile,” he said, ducking down to kiss my chin.
How was he so sweet?
“I mean it,” I said, heart clenching. Had no one ever told Rowan how pretty his smile was? How nice it was to be around him, because once you got past that awkward outer shell he was the sweetest, kindest human being on the planet?
That had to be the only reason he was here with me instead of someone who deserved him. I was stubborn enough to pry the shell open.
“I mean it about your cock, too,” I added, pulling back so I could watch him blush again.
Rowan didn’t disappoint, cheeks glowing pink and the tips of his ears almost purple. He was gorgeous like this.
“Rowan?” I murmured, brushing another kiss over his mouth. I could have kissed him for hours and hours, soaking in every last gasp and hitch and moan and never, ever getting tired of it. “I wanna lie down for round two.”
I’d never get enough of him before this cruise was over, but I was sure as hell going to try.
15
Rowan
“Cu-rah-shao,” Andries repeated for the fifth time.
“Cur-ah-shao,” Lee pronounced. “Cur-a-shao?”
He frowned, an adorable line forming between his brows, and tilted his head.
Andries chuckled. “No, but more than good enough for an American. The locals won’t mind.”
The sun was shining on the deck, the weather just hot enough that sweat was starting to soak into my collar. My shirt was open three buttons deep at Lee's insistence, which I wasn’t strong enough to refuse.
I doubted there was much I could refuse him at all. Especially not when he was whispering all kinds of promises in my ear about exactly what rewards waited for me if I dressed the way he wanted.
Lee wrinkled his nose. “I can’t hear how I’m saying it different to you.”
Beside him, Tyler laughed, cutting off whatever Andries had opened his mouth to say. “Don’t. Don’t get him started or you’ll never hear the end of it and he’ll make you practice rolling Rs all day.”
Andries huffed, but a smile still played around his lips.
Now that I wasn’t terrified Tyler was going to swoop in and woo Lee away while I stood there looking like second best, I could really appreciate what a happy couple they were.
“I needn’t
ask how your evening went,” Andries said, joining me as I leaned against the railings to watch the unpronounceable Curaçao come into view. Lee and Tyler were laughing among themselves, and now that I wasn’t worried that I might lose him to a better man, it was the best sound I’d ever heard.
All I wanted was for Lee to be happy. The thought of his happiness made me smile.
“You lied to Lee,” I said, unable to summon any anger at him for it.
“To great effect. You are dripping sexual satisfaction this morning,” Andries said. “It’s really very attractive.”
“It is?” I asked, heat coursing up the back of my neck. Lee loved to make me blush, and he’d gotten in so much practice last night that I was surprised my face wasn’t permanently pink this morning.
Andries chuckled. “Don’t worry,” he said. “I can see that you only have eyes for Lee and I have no intention of making things any more awkward than either Tyler or myself already have. I suspect that, had we not intervened, you two would have gotten together sooner. So consider that my way of apologizing.”
“Well…”
As a tactic, it had scared the hell out of me. But it’d also forced me to think about what I really wanted and set aside my fears just long enough to reach out and ask for it.
“Consider yourself forgiven,” I said. “For lying, I was never upset about the, umm…”
“Offer,” Andries finished for me. “Good. I’d hate to think I’d lost you as a friend. Especially since I have a charming little café to show you this afternoon.”
“Run by another old friend?”
“Naturally.” Andries said. “An ex, in fact, though we parted on very friendly terms. They moved out here to live with their wife.”
“I’d be thrilled to meet them.”
“I’m relieved the two of you worked things out. It was… painful to see so much genuine affection going unacknowledged. Lee adores you.”
“You think so?” I asked. I should have been sure of his feelings by now, but it was hard to believe they could be real.
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