Starburst: Half Light

by Alyssa Rose Ivy

  “There’s a lot of things people seem to think I can do that I can’t.” Not that people having faith in you was always a bad thing, but it was when they failed to give you the help you needed. No matter how hard I tried I kept winding up in messes. This last one required Dale to come save me—well, try to save me. Ultimately he ended up stuck as well.

  “So not to be a pain, but would you happen to have any other clothes on this ship?” Dale looked around the small room.

  “What’s wrong with what you’re wearing?” Bessy wove her hand up and down the length of him.

  “Well, I guess being that you sparkle my outfit might seem normal, but I don’t usually dress this way.” Dale looked at the ground.

  “How do you usually dress?” She flipped her long braid off her shoulder.

  “Jeans and t-shirts, but that isn’t an option here, so I’d settle for something like what Noah has on.”

  “You are stuck with that outfit for now.” Bessy lips twisted into the hint of a smile.

  Dale frowned. “Why do you look so happy about it?”

  “Why wouldn’t I look happy?” Bessy grinned.

  “Because you’re denying me what I need.”

  “Need?” She raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think so. There are very few things any of us need.”

  “Okay. Want. Is that better?” Dale crossed his arms. This made the sparkles tied to his body suit jingle.

  “Yes. It is better.” The sadness was back in Bessy’s eyes. She needed her daughter. I was nearly certain of that. “Back to our conversation, Noah. I’m sure they are looking for Veraka’s starmate.”

  “Caspian? Joy.” I didn’t bother to bury the sarcasm.

  “Not a fan?” There was amusement in every one of her features.

  “He’s in love with Rachel.” And they had a past. A long past I’d had no part in.

  “But Veraka is his starmate. Not Rachel.” Bessy strode over to where I stood. “Remember that.”

  “Yeah, I know how it sounds. I get it. I’m just explaining why I don’t love the guy.”

  “Well, if you are truly her match then I wouldn’t worry about him.”

  “I’m not worried.” I knew I sounded defensive, but I didn’t particularly care.

  “Sure you are. I saw your reaction when I mentioned where she’d be going.” Bessy shifted her weight from foot to foot.

  “I didn’t react in that way, but it doesn’t matter. We need to figure to where he is if you think that’s the only way we’re going to find Rachel. Does that mean going to his home planet? I think that’s where he was heading last I heard from him.”

  “What’s his home planet?” Bessy touched a screen, and a map with a bunch of different circles on it popped up.

  “Andrelexa.”

  Bessy laughed.

  “What?” I hoped she wasn’t laughing at me, but I didn’t even care anymore. We needed to find Rachel. That was all that mattered.

  Bessy turned, putting her back to the screen. “We can’t just go to Andrelexa.”

  “Why not?” I was sure she knew way more about it than I did.

  “Because it’s a fortified planet.”

  “And wasn’t Soldrum?” Truthfully that hadn’t gone well either. Getting locked in a cell hadn’t been ideal at all.

  “No. They have a part time gatekeeper. You call that fortified?”

  “This is all new to us.” But then again I’d gotten onto the planet fairly easily. I was met by a single gatekeeper, not an army or anything.

  “We can’t just slip into Andrelexa.” Bessy rolled her shoulders.

  “Well, I’m guessing that’s what Rachel and Veraka are going to be doing. Right?”

  “Does Rachel have anything on her we can track?” Bessy asked.

  “She has a robot with her. At least I assume she still has her.” Hopefully Amsi was still kicking—or at least kicking in the robot sense.

  “Okay. What kind of robot? I can try to open up a connection to the frequency.”

  “I have no clue. She’s named AMSI. She is made up of random robot parts. She can connect into any computer system.”

  “Okay. That last part helps. We can scan and see what’s hooked into the systems around Andrelexa.”

  “How far away are we?”

  “Normal speed, a few years. Hyper speed, a few hours.”

  “Good old hyper speed.” Dale tugged on his silver suit. I was sure it was as uncomfortable as it looked.

  “Well, what are we waiting for?” I’d been apart from Rachel long enough.

  “We need to make sure we really want to go this way.”

  “I have to find Rachel.”

  “But do we know for sure that Caspian, was that his name, is on Andrelexa? By the way, Caspian? Is that the son of the Emperor?”

  “Yes. Yes it is.” I waited for her inevitably annoying reaction.

  She laughed. “Okay. Maybe I understand why you worry. I’ve never met him, but word travels. The universe is smaller than you think.”

  “Okay. Enough about how attractive Caspian is.” I assumed that was what she was getting at. “We have to find him so I can find Rachel.”

  “Let me see what I can find.” Bessy turned back toward the screen.

  I waited impatiently and watched Dale. He looked miserable. I was starting to feel bad for the guy.

  Bessy touched the screen, and it went black. “No luck there. You are going to have to find Rachel.”

  “Isn’t that what we’ve been trying to do?”

  “No. I mean you have to find her. Feel her out.”

  “I’m not a feeler. I’m a feeder or something.” Not that I even knew what that meant.

  “Then feed her.”

  “She’s not here.”

  Bessy groaned. “Really, do I have to spell out everything?”

  “With Noah. Yes. You absolutely have to.” Dale was now trying to detach some of the sparkles from his suit. I didn’t see how that was going to help his situation, but it wasn’t my place to try to stop him.

  I frowned.

  Bessy crossed her arms. “You should be able to feed her emotions from anywhere. She’ll feel them, and then in theory you should know where she is.”

  “Doesn’t that still involve me having to do quite a bit of the feeling?” I asked.

  “Yes. Yes it does.”

  “What planet are you from? You never told us.” I realized we knew very little about Bessy aside from her uncanny way to break us out of prison and that she’d murdered people. Over all, that wasn’t exactly reassuring.

  “I spent much of my childhood on Dramas, but I haven’t lived there in a very long time.”

  I knew wasting time wasn’t a good idea, but neither was following this woman blindly. She’d gotten us out of jail, and maybe she could help me find Rachel, but first we needed to know more about her.

  “Where else have you lived?” Dale picked up the questioning.

  “All over.” Bessy looked away. That wasn’t good. Avoiding eye contact was usually done for a specific reason.

  “Where you born on Dramas?” That was a question that should come with a straight answer.

  “Out in the universe.” Or not. Not a straight answer at all.

  “What does that mean?” Dale thankfully kept on pushing so I didn’t have to.

  “It means I was born off-planet. I have no true birth place. No true home.”

  “And where is your daughter exactly?” Dale had this way of asking questions and making them sound innocent. I’d never noticed how useful it was until we left Earth.

  Bessy shrugged. “I don’t know.”

  “Okay. So how are we going to find her?” He pressed.

  “I have some ideas. But there’s no reason to worry about that yet. I told you guys we would find Rachel first.”

  “And I thank you for that.” I might as well be polite.

  She took the opportunity to change the subject. “Okay, Noah. You need to send something to her.
”

  “Yeah, sending feelings isn’t really my thing.” Maybe it would be one day if someone bothered to teach me something, but it sure wasn’t coming naturally.

  “Do I need to set you up in the sensory deprivation chamber?” Bessy pulled out a chair and took a seat.

  “Wait. Is this where you suspend him in salt water like they do on TV all the time?” Dale’s entire face lit up.

  “You sound entirely too excited about that.” And it worried me. Dale was supposed to be on my side here. Otherwise I was completely alone in this.

  “No.” Bessy shook her head. “This is a more advanced version. No floating in salt water here. It is a machine really. It usually does not cause damage.”

  “Usually doesn’t cause damage? Are you serious? How is that reassuring?” Usually didn’t mean never.

  “I’m just saying… and if the alternative is to not find Rachel…” Bessy trailed off. She knew how to get to me. She knew I’d do anything to find Rachel.

  “Yes. I get it. It’s worth the risk if there is a good chance of finding her.”

  “Dale.” Bessy spun in her chair so she was facing him. “You know Noah far better than me, so I’ll let you run the program.”

  “Wait. What?” She had to be kidding.

  “What?” She angled her body toward me. “You don’t trust your friend?”

  “I trust him with a lot of things. Running a dangerous program where I’d be at his mercy and he could hurt me? That doesn’t sound like the best idea.” Dale had to understand. There was my life and then beyond that the balance of the universe at stake.

  “I’ll do fine.” Dale grinned. “Absolutely fine.”

  “Have you ever run something like this?” I asked even though I was sure I knew the answer.

  “No, but you know I’m the best at video games. How can it be much harder?”

  I tried to choke down the cough, but it came out anyway. “You have to be kidding me.”

  “Come on. They have way more advanced technology out here, I’m sure there’s an autopilot function.”

  “There’s no auto-pilot.” Bessy crossed her legs. “Not for something like this.”

  “Maybe you should run it.” Dale paled. “If that’s the case.”

  “Nah. I have to run the ship. Besides, there’s no way he should trust me over you.”

  And she was right. I shouldn’t have but If even Dale had doubts, I had a reason to worry. Over confidence wasn’t always a good thing, but no confidence was far worse.

  “It’s okay, man. I can do it. I think.” Dale looked at the floor rather than at me.

  “Could you at least fake some confidence on this?”

  “Sure. I can fake it.” Dale gave a fake looking smile.

  “Don’t tell me you’re faking it. Forget it. Let’s just get this over with.”

  Bessy laughed. “You two should start a comedy routine. You know a traveling one. You’d pick up quite a bit of currency that way.”

  “I guess we will need to make a living. Our few years of college classes probably aren’t going to cut it up here.” Dale nodded.

  “When are you the one to worry about things like that?” He was the fun loving one. The one who made fun of me for worrying so much about school work.

  “Now. I’m one to worry about that now.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Things have gotten pretty serious.”

  I laughed. I couldn’t help it. There was something about his talking about things becoming serious while still dressed in silver sparkle suit.

  Dale glared at me.

  “Sorry. Let’s do this.” I wasn’t feeling all too good about putting my life in Dale’s hands, but the universe was a big place. I couldn’t leave finding Rachel to chance.

  6 Noah

  “Okay. Great. Let’s do this.” Dale tapped his toes.

  “I’ll set the ship up on auto for a few minutes and get you guys set up.” Bessy touched the screen a few times and then headed down a narrow hallway.

  She pushed open the door to a room. There was a bright red seat in front of several large screens. Across the room was a crazy-looking contraption that looked like a cross between a birdcage and a therapist’s couch.

  “I can’t believe you are this willing.” Dale settled into the bright red seat.

  It looked a whole lot more comfortable than the yellow contraption I was strapping myself into. I scooted over trying to find a more comfortable spot. “I have to.”

  “Yeah. But you aren’t even sweating.” He put his hands behind his head and leaned back. “That’s impressive.”

  “Compared to facing what the Reclos made me face, this is nothing.” And that’s why they’d made me do it. That’s why they made me relive the day my brother died. Once you faced your greatest fears, the rest was easier. At least in theory.

  “Okay, so that insanity was worth it.” Dale rocked back in the chair. “Am I right?”

  “Worth it might be a stretch, but there was something positive that came out of it.” Which was saying something considering what I’d been through. Reliving the day my brother my murdered was absolute hell.

  There was a small beep several cables deployed from the sides of my chair, attaching themselves to my head. “Yeah, this is way more advanced than salt water.”

  “You think?” Bessy leaned over the screens in front of Dale and spoke quietly.

  I closed my eyes and tried to stay calm. I’d get through this just like I’d gotten through everything else. It would all be worth it if it could help me find Rachel.

  “Okay. So I push this button, then move this stick, and then what?” Dale asked.

  “You have to push that one next.” Bessy leaned over Dale more. “Then just let it go. But if Noah’s breathing slows too much you will have to stop it before he dies.”

  “I’d hope that would be self-explanatory.” I blinked a few times as I tried to prepare myself.

  “I am just making sure I do my due-diligence here.” Bessy straightened up. “I don’t need any more guilt on my conscience.”

  Any more guilt? Was this about the murders? Her daughter? Both? It was impossible to know for sure.

  “I don’t want to kill him. You need to give me more than that.” Dale’s face paled.

  “There isn’t more to give. Just watch the numbers.”

  “I’ll try, but I’m not promising anything.”

  Maybe I wasn’t terrified, but that didn’t mean I wasn’t nervous. “Remember what I said about faking it?” I’d given him explicit instructions to at least pretend to know what he was doing. Dale was the kind of guy that would figure things out if and when he had to. That is unless he worked himself up.

  “I’m just making sure I followed the instructions right. That seems pretty important.”

  “Thanks for not trying to kill me.” I tried to sound light, but I wasn’t sure I was successful.

  “Any time, man. Any time.”

  I closed my eyes and hoped I wasn’t being a complete idiot by putting my life in Dale’s hands.

  I was floating. Floating around in darkness. “Rachel?” I wasn’t sure if I was speaking out loud or not. My voice sounded strange to me—foreign, distorted. I tried again. “Rachel? Are you there?”

  I didn’t really expect her to answer right away. Things were never that easy, but it couldn’t hurt to jump right in and try.

  “Hello, Noah.” The voice that answered was clear, focused, and most certainty not Rachel.

  “Joseph?” Was this really happening? Because facing the memory of his death wasn’t enough? Now I was hearing his voice.

  “Of course it’s me. You’ve been listening to my voice since we could talk, I’d think you’d know it.” Although his words were snide, his voice was light. Playful.

  “I know it.” And it still haunted me. No matter how much time passed he was still a part of me—an empty part I couldn’t ignore.

  “So you made it to space, huh? Pretty cool, right? Your nerdiness finall
y paid off.”

  “Being a nerd isn’t why I’m here.” I didn’t mind him using the label. It didn’t bother me when it came from him.

  “Yeah, it probably is. It’s why you helped the girl.”

  “We were destined to be.”

  “Oh yeah? You buying that crock?” The darkness brightened, and then there he was standing there in a dark blue button down shirt and khaki pants. His hair was a mess, and his eyes bright. He looked older now. The same age as me. It wasn’t hard to imagine how he would have aged since in most ways he was my mirror image.

  “It’s not a crock. We are starmates.” I wasn’t sure why I was defending myself so vehemently to someone who couldn’t actually be my brother. He was dead. If I hadn’t known that before I knew it now after watching his death for a second time.

  “Sure. But what does destiny have to do with anything?”

  “Do you know what a starmate is?” I stood up, the cables and bars disappearing with a simple swat of my hand.

  “Sure. Kind of like soul mates, but you help balance the universe or something like that?”

  “Yes. So you get it.” Even I didn’t really get it, but he understood the gist.

  “No. I mean I get why you care about the girl.”

  “Rachel. Her name is Rachel. Not the girl.” He needed to know her name. Even if this wasn’t the real Joseph, he sure looked and sounded like him, and I wanted him to know about Rachel. To know about the girl who had changed everything for me.

  “Okay. Rachel. Sorry. I didn’t know you were so sensitive about everything.”

  “It’s not about everything. But she deserves respect.”

  He grinned. “This is a different side to you, huh?”

  “I guess so. How are you here?” That was the important question, wasn’t it? Eventually I had to get at the root of who, or what, this was in front of me.

  “You mean since I’m dead?” He smirked. It was the type of smirk that got me in trouble when I wore my identical version of it. But not for him. It got him girls and anything else he wanted.

  “You said that bluntly.”