Our relationship had changed, but it was still the same in some ways. Jake and I were still here sharing our special moments alone. Sometimes the more things changed, the more they stayed the same.
He put his shirt back on. “C’mon, Cam. Pick your game. I’m gonna kick your ass.”
“Keep dreaming, Jake.” I put my shirt back on too.
We played video games, and Jake put up a good fight, but he couldn’t beat me. “Just wait until I challenge you to a cooking competition!”
“I give up,” I said.
“So, I’ll be stuck doing all the cooking,” he said with a laugh.
Something funny happened to my stomach when he so casually alluded to the future. It was what people called butterflies, but I was pretty sure it normally happened right before a kiss. Then again, I wasn’t a normal girl.
We heard the front door open and the sound of someone giggling. Connor chased his girlfriend into the room, and they both skidded to a stop. “Oh, hi.” Jen still looked uncomfortable in my presence. “Uh, goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” Jake and I called as they walked out of the room.
We heard the front door open, and Connor came back with a disappointed look on his face.
“You’re playing video games? Couldn’t you do that in the basement?”
“Remember when you told me not to touch your system?” I asked, enjoying his frustration. “You bought that with your own money. Blah, blah, blah.”
“That was three years ago! You know seeing you ruins the mood for Jen,” he complained.
“That’s funny. Seeing Cam always puts me in the mood.” Jake dropped the controller and shot out of the room before Connor could attack him. “Bye, Cam,” he yelled as he made his escape from our house.
I was too busy laughing to answer. “The look on your face,” I gasped and pointed at Connor.
He scowled at me. “I liked it better when you were avoiding each other.”
I was still chuckling. “You walked right into that one. Anyway, if you must know. We haven’t done anything. That’s why we were playing video games instead of doing what you were planning to do with Jen.”
“Oh.” He looked mollified and embarrassed at the same time. “Uh, goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” It had been a very good night, I thought. I reflected on how scared I had been when Jake asked me out, but now I was glad that I had taken a chance on our relationship.
Chapter 16
More months passed without us finding another place to be alone. I didn’t want my first time to be in a car, and on the couch felt too exposed with someone possibly being able to walk in on us. Jake told me not to worry about it and said that we had plenty of time for that in the future. We had fun going on dates and even just hanging out with his family.
I was starting to feel as comfortable at his house as he did at mine. Madison had also ceased to be a problem after she gave up on Jake and easily found a new boyfriend. Everyone at school now knew that Jake and I were a solid couple. Guys had stopped asking me out since it became clear that I wasn’t interested in anyone else. I was happy and secure in my relationship with my boyfriend.
My eighteenth birthday was coming up, and Jake asked me what I wanted for my present. I was completely sure of my answer. “You,” I said.
He smiled. “You already have me.”
We were sitting in his car after our movie date, and I placed my hand on his thigh. “Not every part of you.”
“I told you not to worry about that.” Jake’s light tone of voice had dropped an octave, however.
“I’m not worried. That’s the whole point. It’s not about proving anything or avoiding anything. I love you, Jake, but I also want you.”
I had a plan for where we could go to be alone together. The banks seemed to know that my birthday was approaching too, because they had started sending me credit card offers. I had filled one out on a whim and been surprised to receive a credit card even though I didn’t have a job.
Holding it in my hand had made me feel so grown up. My thoughts had turned to all the perks of being an adult, and I had realized that I could now go anywhere I wanted. That had led to the idea of getting a hotel room. I could use my new credit card to pay for a room.
Jake listened to me explain my plans. “Are you sure about this, Cam?”
“I’m absolutely sure. Do you still want to?” I didn’t want to pressure him again.
His voice had dropped another octave. “If you move your hand a little higher, you’ll have your answer.”
“Or it might actually be a rock this time,” I joked, but my voice wasn’t quite steady. Instead of moving my hand higher, I took hold of his hand. “I’ll get us a room that Friday after my birthday.”
“It’s not set in stone, Cam.” He gave my hand a squeeze. “You can still change your mind anytime.”
I didn’t change my mind. Our birthday was on a Wednesday this time, and Mom took the day off and let us stay home from school like she did every year. The three of us spent the entire day together and went out for dinner. Connor and I had both opted not to have a party, but Jake’s siblings threw us a “surprise” party on Thursday.
We heard them giggling, but we pretended to be surprised when they popped up from behind their couch. They were bursting with excitement as they led us into the kitchen where their parents had a cake for us. They had known Connor for years, and the kids treated him like another brother. I had made plans to hang out with my friends on Saturday, but Friday was for me and Jake. He got me a cool t-shirt and two tickets for a concert to see one of my favorite bands.
“Hmm,” I said coyly. “I wonder who I should take with me.”
“I wanna go!” Justin shouted.
“You’re too little,” Katie, who was fourteen, told him.
“Am not!” Justin glared at her. “I’m six,” he added proudly.
“Cam doesn’t want to go with you,” ten-year-old Lexie said. “She wants to go with her boyfriend.”
“I’m gonna be her boyfriend,” Justin informed her. “We’re gonna get married.”
The others laughed at him while I bent down to kiss the top of his head. “I can’t believe it,” Jake said. “My own brother moving in on my girl.”
“How about we go for ice cream instead?” I offered. “Just me and you on Sunday.”
“Yeah, ice cream!” Justin stuck his tongue out at his sisters.
“We’ll bring some home for you guys too.” I didn’t want them to feel bad by leaving them out.
“You don’t have to do that, Cam,” Jake’s dad said.
“I want to. I’m not going to get to see them as much when I go away to college.” This was our senior year of high school already.
It was hard to concentrate on my classes on Friday. As soon as we pulled into our driveway after school, I told Connor that I would be back soon.
“Where are you going?” Connor asked.
“I need to get something at the store,” I lied.
“Pick me up some beer,” he joked.
I had driven down the street and around the corner when I got a text message from Mom telling me to get a gallon of milk. Now I would really have to stop at the store. I drove to the hotel first and paid for a room. The credit card worked, and I received a key to the room.
“What’d you need at the store?” Connor asked when I returned home with the milk.
“It’s in my purse.” Let him think it was a feminine product for all I cared.
He probably did, because he looked away from my purse in distaste.
“Are you going out tonight?” Mom asked.
“Yes,” we both answered.
“Don’t forget you have to work in the morning,” she reminded Connor.
She had been telling us since we were sixteen that she was cutting off our spending money once we turned eighteen. If we wanted to pay for fun, we would have to get jobs. She apparently meant it, because she had given us more money than usual for this bi
rthday but reminded us that this was it until Christmas.
Connor had already gotten a job. He must have realized that he now needed to work in order to afford to take his girlfriend out. I still hadn’t gotten around to looking for a job yet, mostly because Jake insisted on paying for all our dates. I suddenly wondered how his parents could afford to give him so much spending money when they had six kids.
“What time do you think you’ll be home?” Connor asked me after I got out of the shower.
“Probably an hour before Mom comes home.”
He looked at me suspiciously. “What’s open that late? You can’t get into the clubs yet.”
“We’re going to go driving around,” I said.
He was still looking at me with suspicion. “Cam—”
I cut him off impatiently. “Since it was your birthday too, you know that I’m eighteen now. Which means that I’m an adult. Hence, it’s none of your business.”
“Forget it,” he said. “I don’t wanna know.”
I went into my room to get dressed, and Connor went into the bathroom to take his own shower. It was warm outside, so I wore shorts and a t-shirt. I left my hair down for Jake, although I didn’t think that would be his main focus tonight. Connor left before Jake arrived, and I suspected that he was going to pick up Jen and take advantage of having the house to himself. Jake greeted me with a brief kiss, and we were pretty quiet as he drove to the hotel. I told him that I already had the key, so we wouldn’t need to waste time checking in.
“Do you want to go get something to eat first?” Jake sounded a little nervous too.
“I’m not hungry,” I said as he parked the car. “Are you?”
When his eyes met mine, I saw the heat in his gaze. “Not for food.”
He then opened his door and stepped out of the car, and I saw him open the door to the backseat as I exited the car. He took out a couple of bags, and I saw that one contained orange juice. “For my lady,” he said with a smile.
“What’s in the other one?” I asked.
“Snacks. You’re going to need to get your energy back.”
“Ha! I think you’re the one who’s going to need energy.” I was grateful that he was attempting to lighten the mood, because the intensity between us had been almost too much. I was nervous again as I unlocked the door to the room.
Jake set the bags down on the dresser and turned to look at me. “If you change your mind, just tell me to stop. Okay, Cam?”
“Yeah.” I walked up to him and ran a hand up his arm. “Did you bring the condom?”
“Yeah, it’s in my pocket. Do you know that you’re corrupting a minor?” Jake teased.
His eighteenth birthday was two months away, and he had taken to joking about me being the older woman.
“Ha! I think you’re the one who’s corrupting me.”
“Not yet,” he said. Then he leaned down to kiss me.
I was already in a heightened state of desire from thinking about this for every day for the past week, and his kiss inflamed me further. My hands slipped under his shirt to touch his back, and I reveled in the feel of his skin. He picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around him as we continued to kiss. Jake walked with me to the bed and set me down.
His eyes. God, the way he was looking at me! I could barely remember how to breathe.
“Cam,” he said, his voice coarse with passion. “Are you sure?”
I yanked my shirt up and over my head, flinging it to the floor. “Get over here and corrupt me, Jake.”
Chapter 17
I slept in on Saturday because I had gotten home so late. Mom was still sleeping, and Connor was presumably at his job. I stopped to look at myself in the bathroom mirror to see if I looked any different. Of course, my face still looked the same as it always did, except for the slight flush on my cheeks as I thought about what had happened last night.
Jake had made me feel things I’d never felt before, and my body had come alive with his touch. The experience was so much more than I had imagined it would be. The intimacy we had shared made me feel closer to him than I had ever felt to anyone else. I thought back to my original plan to have sex with him and go back to being just friends. Now I knew that it would have been a failure, because my desire for Jake hadn’t gone away after we made love. In fact, it was already coming back as I thought about how it had felt to be with him.
There had been a happy, comfortable atmosphere between us afterwards as we drank juice, ate snacks, and talked. We snuggled while we watched some TV. I even dozed off for a while, and Jake woke me up when it was time to leave. He laughed at my dismay when I noticed the blood on the sheets.
“It’s because you were a virgin, Cam.”
“But the maids will see it,” I fretted.
“We’ll be long gone by then. It’s probably not the first time they’ve seen something like that,” he reasoned.
I was still embarrassed by it as I got dressed. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Hey.” Jake stopped my flight toward the door. “Do you regret it?”
“I would have brought a towel or something if I knew that was going to happen.” My thoughts were still on the stained sheets.
“That’s not what I meant, Cam. Do you regret what happened between us?”
I was startled by his question. “No. Do you?”
“No, as long as you’re okay with it. This has been the best night of my life. I know it wasn’t as good for you, but it’ll be better next time.”
“It gets better than that?” I asked in wonder.
Some of the heat came back into his eyes as he looked at me. “Yes, Cam. I promise to make it better next time.”
I suddenly didn’t want to leave this room, but I knew that I had to get home before Mom returned.
“It’s time to go,” I said reluctantly.
When we were in the car on the way home, I continued the conversation. “Why did you say that it wasn’t as good for me?”
“From what I’ve been reading, the first time isn’t that good for girls,” Jake said.
“You’ve been reading about sex? I thought you already knew about it from experience.” I was torn between being curious about his sexual past and dreading the answer.
“I don’t know much,” he admitted to my surprise. “My first time was at a party, and I was drunk, so my memory of it isn’t that clear. It was weird to wake up in her bed the next morning since we weren’t even dating. Then she kept hanging on me and trying to get with me again. I thought I might as well since we already did it before anyway. It was even worse that time, because I ended up calling out your name. She was pissed, and I thought that was it, but then she was all over me again in a few days.”
“You mean you’ve only been with Madison?” I asked.
“Yeah, three times. It wasn’t exactly a great learning experience. That’s why I’ve been reading up on the female response to try to make it good for you.”
This struck me as funny. “You’ve been studying how to have sex with me?”
“Yeah,” he grinned. “I didn’t mind doing homework for once.” Then he sounded uncertain. “How’d I do?”
“It was good,” I told him. There had been the pain at the end, but it had been amazing before that.
“It’ll be better next time,” he insisted.
Jake drove me home, and we kissed goodnight. There was a text message from him on my phone when I woke up. He had written that he loved me. I texted him back that I loved him too. Then I decided to make breakfast for Mom. I cooked the bacon first, and then I made the eggs when I heard Mom walking around upstairs. She walked into the kitchen just as the toast was done.
“Wow, it’s not even my birthday,” she said with a smile.
I set her toast down beside her plate of eggs. “It doesn’t have to be your birthday for me to show you how much I appreciate you.”
“I’m still not giving you anymore spending money.” She tried to keep her voice stern, but she ruined it b
y laughing.
I walked up to her and gave her a hug. “I mean it, Mom. I love you.”
She was startled by my fierce tone of voice. “I love you too, Cam.” She pulled back to look at me. “Is everything okay?”
I didn’t know why I was suddenly so emotional. “Yeah, it’s just that you’ve always been there for us when Daddy wasn’t. I just want you to know how much that means to me.”
Mom’s eyes were glistening with tears. “Oh sweetheart! You’re my wonderful baby girl,” she said as she hugged me.
It was all coming to an end, I realized. This was my last year of high school before I left home for college. I blinked back my own tears. “Eat your breakfast before it gets cold.” I sat down at the table and ate with her.
She asked about my plans for the day, and I told her that I was going to hang out with my friends. “I’m going to start looking for a job next week.”
“It’s good to get some work experience before college. I think it’ll help you focus on your goals if you know what it’s like to work for your money. Too many kids fail their classes in college, because all they did was party,” Mom said.
“I’m not into that at all.” I could never understand the appeal of getting wasted. For me nothing could compare to the adrenaline rush of playing sports. At least nothing could compare to it until last night, I thought.
“I know, and I hope that won’t change.” What she left unspoken was her fear that Connor or I would become alcoholics like our father.
“So, what are you doing tonight? Do you have a date?” I asked in order to lead the conversation away from uncomfortable topics.
“I do, and Nathan wants to go to this ridiculously expensive restaurant. I can’t see the sense in spending so much on one meal.” She shook her head at this foolishness.
“He’s paying, right?” I smiled when she nodded. “Then just enjoy yourself. You don’t go to fancy places all the time. Let him splurge if he wants to.”
“I guess it’ll be nice to dress up for a change,” she conceded.
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