Nina shook her head. ‘Every time I think about being with someone else I feel so guilty, like I’m thinking of having an affair.’
‘Ah,’ Robyn said with a satisfied grunt. ‘So you have thought about it.’
‘Well… of course I have,’ Nina said. ‘I mean, I wouldn’t be human if I hadn’t, would I?’
‘So have you thought about it with anyone in particular?’
‘No,’ Nina said, hoping the emphatic lie would end the current line of questioning. ‘I just don’t see anyone that way. Maybe that in itself answers the question really – maybe I’m not ready after all.’
‘But you did say Colm was quite good-looking.’
‘That’s just an observation because you asked me what he was like. It’s like saying his hair is black or his eyes are blue.’
‘Well I’d club him over the head and drag him directly to my bed right now. Don’t tell me you haven’t at least thought the same thing.’
‘I don’t know about the clubbing bit,’ Nina said, trying to make light of the conversation, though she really wished now it would take a different turn. ‘Do you think we should take some digestive biscuits out?’ she asked, going to the cupboard. ‘I’m sure I have a pack in here somewhere.’
Robyn clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, as if to show impatience with Nina’s avoidance tactics, but if she really did think they were avoidance tactics then she didn’t say so.
‘Sure,’ she answered. ‘Whatever you think.’
Nina found the biscuits and checked the date on the pack before putting them on the tray to take out with the drinks.
‘So,’ Robyn asked casually after a moment, ‘if I ask Colm out, you’re sure you don’t have any issues with it?’
‘He’s very nice; why would I have an issue with it?’
Robyn gave her a doubtful look.
‘Honestly,’ Nina said, forcing another smile. It seemed to be the only way they’d come out today. ‘I don’t mind at all. Go snap him up before someone else does because I think he’d make someone a lovely boyfriend and I’d rather it be you than anyone else.’
Robyn grinned. ‘Maybe I will,’ she said, pouring hot water into the mugs one by one. ‘At least I’ll see how today plays out and if it seems promising then I’ll go for it. That is, if I read it right.’
‘You’ll read it right,’ Nina said, ‘you always do. And he’d be crazy to turn you down so I’m sure he’ll say yes.’
Robyn picked up the tray. ‘Right then, let’s go and start phase one… bribery with tea and biscuits.’
Nina pushed aside the regret that lay heavy in her gut and the sadness mixed with envy. She would be happy for her friend, and she would offer support and encouragement, because a woman who was brave enough to take a chance instead of hiding away, terrified of new beginnings, deserved all the support and encouragement Nina could give.
‘That’s a sight for sore eyes!’ Colm grinned as Nina and Robyn returned with their tray of refreshments. ‘Biscuits too! I’ll be coming here again, so I will.’
‘That’s very kind,’ Nasser said, taking a cup.
‘Oooh, lovely!’ Kelly said, taking one too. Then Ron grabbed the pack of biscuits before Colm could reach them and took a handful before slapping them back on the tray with enough force to break every remaining biscuit. Robyn opened her mouth, set to give him a piece of her mind, but was stopped by Colm’s good-natured laugh.
‘Someone’s worked up an appetite already,’ he said, taking a digestive for himself. It snapped instantly in his hands. Ron glared at him, cradling his haul like Gollum with his Precious and, despite the situation, it was hard not to laugh.
‘I’m giving up my time,’ Ron said sourly, ‘and they’re supposed to be for everyone.’
‘Yes,’ Robyn said. ‘They’re for everyone.’
Nina could have safely bet her house that Robyn was dying to make some additional sarcastic comment about how everyone had given up their time and if biscuit allocation had been based on hours given in good humour then Ron would have to hand all but a lick of chocolate back from his stash.
‘I reckon,’ Colm began, taking a sip of his tea as he surveyed the garden, ‘if we get a good day and push on we could be done here by nightfall.’ He looked at everyone with a broad smile, his gaze finally settling on Nina. ‘And you could get your campaign back on track.’
‘That’d be amazing,’ Nina said, and she almost meant it. Of course she wanted to get the memory tree project going again; it was just the bit about the garden being finished that she wasn’t so keen on. Once the garden was done there’d be no need for Colm to come back to Sparrow Street and she’d probably never see him again. Then again, the alternative outcome here might be that he ended up dating Robyn, and that might be just as unbearable as not seeing him at all. She was beginning to wish she’d never met the man.
After they’d finished their tea and biscuits, Colm gave directions and instructions on what he thought still needed to be done and the best way to do it and they all began work. Spirits were surprisingly high considering manpower was thin on the ground – even Ron didn’t look completely miserable as he raked over the soil in a plot that would be home to a trellis of climbing roses. However, it wasn’t long before he was dropping hints that were about as subtle as a sledgehammer that he was thirsty and wondering when the next cup of tea might be available. Kelly volunteered this time, which was lucky, because if Robyn had been forced to go and make a second pot so soon after the first, she might just have tipped it over Ron’s head.
So they all stopped again, because it seemed only polite when Kelly had gone to the trouble of popping back home to oblige, and then Ron needed the toilet so he disappeared. It was a good hour before he came back muttering about his old problem. It seemed that nobody much liked the ominous way in which he labelled his old problem and so nobody asked about it, and Ron’s expression was sourer than ever as he took up the rake again, clearly disappointed that not one of his neighbours found his old problem as fascinating and mysterious as he did.
They’d been back at it for about ten minutes or so when Nina, who was helping Robyn lay (i.e. wrestle hopelessly with) some weed-proof membrane, heard Nasser hail someone in greeting. She and Robyn looked up at the same time to see Peter arrive. Nina glanced at Robyn and noted the way her features tightened. She saw them exchange a brief look of recognition, of perhaps regret too, before Robyn returned to her task without a word.
‘Don’t you think you ought to go and say hello?’ Nina asked.
‘What for?’
‘I don’t know… because it doesn’t seem right to ignore him? It seems like he wants to be friends if you can’t be anything else.’
‘Perhaps he does,’ Robyn said shortly, but she made no move to abandon what she was doing.
‘Would that be so bad?’
‘Maybe not for others but for me… too messy. We’re together or we’re not – I can’t be doing with that in-between limbo stuff.’
‘Well then, perhaps you ought to at least put him straight because he doesn’t look like someone who’s getting that.’
Robyn looked up again, and although Peter was talking to Nasser his gaze kept flicking over to her.
‘I’m sure he’ll work it out for himself eventually,’ Robyn said, returning to her work.
Nina rolled her eyes. ‘And you think I’m difficult.’
At this, she caught a fleeting grin on Robyn’s face. It was encouraging; it showed that she wasn’t completely heartbroken over Peter, nor was she completely angry with him. Perhaps she wasn’t really as cold and unmoved by his attempts to reach out as she might pretend to be.
‘Well,’ Nina continued, ‘I don’t think he’s worked it out at all. In fact, he’s on his way over…’
Robyn straightened up, and despite the resolute set of her shoulders as she faced him, a hand strayed to her hair to smooth it down. Nina held back a smile. For all Robyn’s tough talk, all her flirting wi
th Colm, it was as clear as day that she still had a lot of affection for Peter. Maybe they’d work it out after all. And guilty as that might make Nina feel because her reasons for wanting that outcome weren’t entirely pure, she still found herself wanting it.
‘Hi,’ he said awkwardly.
Nina smiled. ‘Hello, Peter.’
‘How’s the work going?’ he asked, though nobody standing there thought for a minute he cared what was happening in that garden.
‘Good,’ Nina said. ‘Um… I’ve just got to see Nasser about something,’ she added, scurrying off, just knowing that Robyn’s irritated glare would be following her. She looked back to see Peter begin an earnest conversation and, to her credit, Robyn seemed to be giving him time to speak. It looked promising.
It was then that Nina, her attention still fixed on what was happening behind her, thudded into something large and soft, throwing her off balance.
‘Oh!’ she cried, immediately feeling arms close around her and looking up into Colm’s face. ‘Oh! I’m sorry!’
‘My fault,’ he said with an apologetic smile. ‘I should have said something but I didn’t see you hurtling towards me until it was too late. Besides,’ he added with a look that was somehow impish, ‘I’d plenty of time to catch you.’
Nina almost leapt from his arms, her cheeks scarlet. Did that mean he’d wanted to catch her? Had he deliberately let her run into him?
‘Totally my fault,’ she said. ‘I should have been watching where I was going.’
‘Let’s just share the blame and leave it at that,’ Colm said, still looking far more amused by the whole thing than Nina.
‘Yes.’ Nina straightened her clothes. Not that there was a lot of point: what with the mess from the garden and the fact that she hadn’t worn her best anyway, it hardly made a difference to the way she looked. She hadn’t wanted to ruin anything good, but she was beginning to wish she’d worn something a little more flattering than her old jeans and a sweatshirt she’d picked up from the Sacred Heart shop before it had closed down.
Colm plunged his hands into his pockets and looked towards Robyn and Peter.
‘They’re an item?’ he asked.
‘Oh,’ Nina said, unable to deny the lurch of disappointment that he was even asking. Did that mean he was interested in Robyn after all? ‘Robyn and Peter? They used to be,’ she added. ‘I’m not sure where they’re at now, to be honest. I only know it needs work.’
‘She’s a feisty one, isn’t she?’
‘She is – a force of nature.’
‘If I knew him better, would I wish him luck or warn him to wear a tin hat?’
‘She’s not that bad,’ Nina said. ‘She’s really lovely when you get to know her.’
‘I don’t doubt that.’
‘Very attractive.’
‘True.’
‘She’s going to be a real catch for someone.’
‘For some lucky man, to be sure. Perhaps your man Peter there – looks like he’s keen.’
Colm turned to Nina with a smile
‘About that lantern,’ he began after a pause.
‘Lantern? You mean on the memory tree?’
Nina recalled now that he’d mentioned taking a lantern before. She’d wondered who it was for – perhaps she was about to find out.
‘How would I get in touch with you when I’m ready to buy one?’
‘Well, it’s not exactly buying…’
‘What else is it? I give you some money and you put up a lantern for me. Sounds like buying to me.’
‘I just prefer to call it donating.’
‘Well, how do I donate?’
‘I expect we’ll have a website. Maybe a number people can call if they don’t like using the internet – some don’t, especially the pensioners. I haven’t really finalised it yet, being so busy here and everything.’
‘Would that be your phone number?’ he asked, a bit too innocently.
Nina’s cheeks began to burn again. ‘I don’t know. Do you think it’s a bad idea to use mine?’
‘Depends who you’re giving it to,’ he replied, a definite gleam of mischief in his eyes now.
Nina hauled in a breath, so light-headed that she felt she might faint, every sense, every awareness heightened. His obvious flirting had caught her off guard and she didn’t know how to react. She only knew that something was coming, something big, and this time she might be brave enough to take the leap.
‘Oh… well, I…’
Words wouldn’t come out. Nina had never felt so useless, less capable of responding. She wanted to be able to express herself but she couldn’t. She wanted to tell him to go ahead and ask, and that the answer would be yes. But then, her eyes travelled to where Robyn was still talking to Peter. It wasn’t just about Gray now, or whether Nina was ready or not, was it? Robyn had made her own intentions towards Colm clear – what would it do to their friendship if Nina did this now?
‘It’s him you fancy?’ Colm asked, cutting into her thoughts. She shook herself and turned to face him, not realising that she must have been staring at Robyn and Peter. The question was so unexpected, so completely and utterly off the mark that Nina began to laugh.
‘Peter? No! It’s not like that at all!’
‘So… what about me? You could maybe fancy me?’
‘Oh God yes!’ she said, realising instantly that perhaps her admission had been a little too fervent and not cool at all.
He let out a low chuckle. ‘So, I was wondering then… you might also fancy a drink with me sometime?’
‘Oh… I don’t know…’
He frowned slightly. ‘I’m sorry, I’m reading this wrong? I thought…’
‘Oh, I’d love to, but it’s just…’ Nina looked across at Robyn again.
‘So it’s your friend?’ Colm said. ‘She doesn’t approve of me?’
Nina’s eyes widened. ‘Are you kidding? She’s practically been throwing herself at you since the day she met you! Don’t say you haven’t noticed!’
‘Oh.’ Colm grinned, and, rather sweetly, he blushed almost as deeply as Nina had earlier. There was something quite gratifying about the fact that it wasn’t her this time. But then his grin faded. ‘Does that mean you’re going to refuse me?’
Nina gave an awkward shrug. Hearing it like that it sounded trite and silly. She and Robyn were grown women who knew by now how love and friendship worked – they simply had to sit down and talk about it, and it was really Nina’s fault that they hadn’t already. Robyn would have gladly done it and she’d tried, which made Nina feel even sillier. But then, hadn’t it been about more than just being attracted to the same man?
‘I don’t know much,’ Colm said, ‘but I think your dilemma might sort itself out.’
Nina looked back. Robyn was close to Peter now. She was smiling and so was he – if Nina knew anything about body language it looked as if they’d very much patched up their differences.
‘So…’ Colm began again, his voice low now and oh so achingly sexy. ‘What do you say? You… me…? That drink?’
‘I don’t…’ Nina began a response that was so automatic, so well-programmed that it made her want to slap herself. It was the one she didn’t really have to think about, the one that caused the least emotional upheaval, but it was the one that would leave her lonely again while the rest of the world lived and loved without her.
‘One drink,’ Colm cut in. ‘Just friends, no funny business if you don’t want it. What harm can it do?’
Nina hesitated, despite all that ran through her mind. What was wrong with her? Why couldn’t she say yes? She looked at Robyn and Peter again. They were kissing. Then she turned back to Colm and was trapped in those blue eyes as soon as their gazes met. Shyness and terror, boldness and excitement, and about another million different emotions raced through her, but in the end, she smiled. She could do this. Why not? Other people did it all the time. Other people moved on; were they all wrong to seize a second chance? She had a suspi
cion that if Gray had to approve another man for Nina, he’d have approved a man like Colm.
She nodded finally, her heart thumping. When words came, it was as if they’d come from someone else’s mouth. It was as if life was about to change in ways she couldn’t imagine.
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I’d like that.’
‘There’s something I should probably tell you before we get that far, though,’ he added. Nina looked at him and suddenly he looked troubled. ‘I’m married. Separated, but some are still bothered by the fact—’
‘I know,’ Nina said breathlessly. ‘I mean, my dad told me.’
‘Ah – of course he did. And I have a daughter too. She’s fifteen.’
‘I know. Dad told me that too.’
‘So you’re OK with all that?’
‘Of course I’m totally OK with your daughter. I honestly don’t know about the other thing. I suppose for now. I mean, I’m guessing that you asking me out means it’s properly over?’
‘Without a doubt,’ he said with a grim nod. ‘She’s never coming back and I gave up waiting a long time ago.’
‘I know how you feel.’
‘You lost your husband, so I’m told. How long has it been?’
‘Two years.’
‘And you haven’t…?
Nina shook her head. ‘No… it’s just never happened. Never quite the right circumstances, I suppose, and perhaps a little my fault too if I’m honest. That doesn’t put you off, does it?’
‘Of course not,’ he said. ‘I understand it must have been hard. I can take things as slowly as you like, you know.’
Nina smiled. ‘I think I might be a bit sick of taking things slowly. Why don’t we just take things as they come instead?’
Chapter Sixteen
Nina was relieved to see that Colm had turned up in a car rather than the work van he’d been coming to Sparrow Street in. With his company name emblazoned across the sides, it was a bit too conspicuous for her liking. It was still hard not to feel guilty, as if she was doing something she shouldn’t be (even though she wasn’t), and she didn’t want to draw attention to who was picking her up. The last thing she needed was to be the focus of gossip on Sparrow Street. Almost as soon as the knock had come at her front door, she was out, hurrying to his car so that they wouldn’t be seen lingering on the doorstep.
The Garden on Sparrow Street: A heartwarming, uplifting Christmas romance Page 16