Step Into the Wind

by Bev Prescott

  Zoe shook her head. “I don’t know. Maybe a little bit of the right kind of genes and a whole lot of will to live.” She gazed up into the tree’s broad, rounded crown of branches covered in long pointy leaves. Its catkins were on the verge of flowering in the early warmth. She imagined the intoxicating fragrance that would waft into the air when it was finally in full bloom.

  “They still do grow in New England, but the blight kills them before they mature. Not this mother tree, though. She is amazing.” Zoe felt Alex’s energy mingle with the chestnut’s when she stood next to her. She had to force a breath into her lungs. “It was so nice of you to share with me.”

  “I’m glad it made you as happy as I’d hoped it would. You deserve it after what you went through this morning to save that eaglet.” Alex slid the backpack off her shoulder and took out a blanket. She spread the blanket on the ground at the base of the tree, sat down, and smoothed the wrinkles. “The bugs aren’t bad at all. It’s probably been too dry for them to get going. We could sit awhile until they find us.”

  Zoe sat down next to her under the expansive canopy. “Do you think your father would mind if I climbed this tree? It would be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

  “I could ask him,” Alex said. “You really do love trees.”

  “Have you ever climbed one?”

  “Sure, but only when I was a kid.”

  “I’m assuming not too high, then,” Zoe said. “If you’re willing, I’d love to teach you how to climb at least”—she pointed at a branch hanging overhead about eighty feet off the ground—“as high as that branch. Then you’ll understand why I love trees so much. There’s nothing like being cradled in a treetop away from all the troubles people make on the ground.”

  “That’s a tempting thought.” Alex glanced away from the treetop and out at the meadow. “But I don’t think I could do it. It’s probably best for me to keep my feet on the ground.” She pulled a couple of plastic containers from the pack.

  “Not into climbing trees?”

  “I don’t like being afraid. If you got me up as high as that branch and I froze, you’d be stuck staying up there with me.” Alex handed Zoe one of the containers. “I hope you like peanut butter and homemade blackberry jam. My father always has a supply of it on hand. For as long as I can remember, he’s picked the wild blackberries that grow at the edge of the camp and made jam.”

  “Being stuck up there with you wouldn’t be so bad, as long as we had these sandwiches. I love blackberry jam.” Zoe accepted the container. “I know you said that no place is home, but if you don’t mind my asking, where do you live? Sounds like you’ve been away awhile. You don’t have much of a Maine accent either.”

  “Southern California. As for my accent, I made an effort to lose it when I went away to college.”

  “Why?” Zoe asked.

  “It made me stand out more than I wanted. I prefer to blend into the background and go unnoticed.”

  Zoe wanted to tell Alex that she was too beautiful to be overlooked. “What’s in southern California?”

  “I teach history at Southern Cal.” Alex took a bite of her sandwich.

  “It must be kind of hard to blend into the background in front of a room full of students.”

  Alex finished chewing and swallowed. “Not really. When I’m in the classroom, I have my professor’s hat on. That’s all they see. They can’t see the real me underneath.”

  “Ah, the incognito professor. Do you at least like teaching while you’re hiding out?”

  Alex crossed her legs and leaned against the chestnut tree. “Not really.” She took another bite of sandwich.

  “So why do you do it?”

  Alex swallowed. “History’s my passion. Teaching just comes with the territory for a lot of historians. I’d love to be able to get by on research and writing alone. But I do need to pay the bills. Maybe I should say instead that I choose to pay the bills over doing exactly what I want.”

  “That’s a healthy way of looking at things. Life is all about choices, even when we think we don’t have any.”

  “Sometimes our choices aren’t all that palatable.” Alex smiled. “I hope I’m not giving you the impression that I’m a total downer.”

  “Honesty isn’t a bad thing. Why don’t you tell me a truth about something that makes you happy?” Zoe elbowed Alex. “Even a Debbie Downer like you must have something.”

  Alex made a funny face. “All right, I’m really enjoying my morning with you. It’s the best one I’ve had since I got here.”

  Zoe’s brain and tongue abandoned her at Alex’s compliment. Fortunately, she was able to rally a response. “Do you usually come back to Maine during the summers to work with your father?” I can’t believe you just changed the subject. What is the matter with you?

  “No. The truth is, this is my first summer home since I left for college. My mother’s dying and my father needed help.” Alex slapped at the top of her thigh. “Geez, I think the black flies are on to us.”

  “I’m so sorry about your mom.” Zoe weighed the wisdom of putting her arm around Alex and decided against it. Notwithstanding their ease with each other, Alex was still a stranger in the big picture. Even though Alex’s vibe suggested she was gay, Zoe wasn’t completely sure.

  Alex wiped her hands on a napkin and put it in the empty plastic container. “Don’t be. I don’t deserve it.”

  “Why would you say such a thing?”

  “My mother’s already gone in my heart. I said good-bye to her years ago. My father despises me for it. Our family doesn’t deserve the sympathy.” Alex seemed to hold back a heavy wall of emotion. The pain etched on her face betrayed the weight of it. “I’m the one who should be sorry for laying this on you.” She swatted another black fly. “We should head back. My father will get cranky if I’m gone much longer with one of his boats. Besides, these flies are becoming relentless.” Alex’s hard shell, which Zoe had noticed when they first met, returned to cover her like protective armor.

  Zoe stood and reached out a hand. “Sure. You’re probably right. Besides, my gear should be arriving soon. I need to get to work looking after the eaglets on your father’s island.”

  Alex took the offered hand and rose to her feet. “Any chance I could go with you sometime? I’d love to learn more about them.” She gripped a bit tighter before letting go. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about the one that your colleague, Rob, let me help band.”

  “They do get under your skin, don’t they?” Zoe pressed the palm of her hand—the one that had been held by Alex—against her hip to still its vibration. Alex had managed to get under her skin too. “Thank you for bringing me to see the chestnut tree.”

  “Thanks for coming. I didn’t expect to make a friend while I was home this summer,” Alex said.

  “I didn’t either. I’d love to you have your company sometime when I’m out observing the eagles.” Zoe considered the irony of wanting to spend time with Alex when her usual mode of operation was to escape people whenever she could. But Alex wasn’t just any person. She was different from anyone else she’d ever met.

  Chapter 10

  Alex placed the heel of her foot on the long pine board that formed the picnic table’s seat and leaned over to stretch her hamstring. The early morning sun beat down on her bare shoulders with an intensity more like August. She should’ve brought extra tank tops for running, but she’d never expected Maine to be this warm in early June.

  A shadow passed over her, similar to the one she’d noticed on her first morning back in Glasgow. She looked up in time to see an eagle with widespread wings gliding toward the nest on the island. Something lifeless dangled from its talons. On cue, the eaglets chirped wildly as their parent came near.

  The eagle flapped its wings a couple of times, picking up speed as it swung around to the back of the island to approach the nest at a spot with fewer branches. When it touched down, the eaglets went silent. Alex assumed they were filling their
bellies.

  “Hi. I didn’t think anyone else got up this early in the morning.” Zoe came down the hill toward her, carrying a small dry-bag, lifejacket, and kayak paddle. “They’re amazing birds, aren’t they?”

  “Yes. I can’t help watching them whenever I see them fly.” Alex put her foot down on the ground and leaned back a little to stretch her back. “Speaking of birds, I’m not surprised that you’re an early one too. You must be heading out on the water by the time I go for my morning run. I’m not sure how we’ve managed to miss each other the last couple of days.”

  Zoe smirked. “I don’t know. Maybe the seventy-five wiggly ten- to twelve-year-olds have something to do with it. You seem to disappear into that group whenever they’re set free from their bunkhouses in the morning.” She placed her dry-bag on the picnic table and set about adjusting the direction of her paddle’s blades.

  “Do you ever have the occasion to spend time with little kids?”

  “Only during the holidays when I go back to Iowa. The trouble is my nieces and nephews are usually hopped up on sugar and whatever ideas they have about what Santa will bring them. I’m afraid they’ve tainted my perspective.” Zoe shook her head. “I do love them, but it’s never a relaxing scene at Christmas time.”

  Alex rolled her head from side to side, stretching her neck. “We don’t let the campers eat much sugar when they’re here, and they get plenty of exercise. Kids are actually quite charming when they aren’t under the influence of bad food and all the stuff they think they need to have. For some of them, coming here is the only time in their lives when they get to experience nature. I love watching them be transformed by it. Some of them are ecstatic that the eagles are here. They can’t wait to watch the eaglets learn to fly.”

  “I have to be honest about something.” Zoe picked up her dry-bag from the picnic table. “It’s nice to see kids out playing the whole day. When I came here, I thought it would be a battle between me and the camp over protecting the eagles. I’m glad they’re as interested in them as you are. Having the camp’s support in protecting them is a big deal.”

  A car door slammed shut. Alex glanced toward the parking lot and saw James carrying a leather briefcase. He was dressed like someone who should be headed to the boardroom of a large company instead of the camp’s main office. “I can’t say for sure whether that’ll always be the case.”

  “I don’t understand,” Zoe said.

  “I care, but James doesn’t, and he has my father in his back pocket.” The look of disappointment and concern on Zoe’s face bothered Alex, but she had to adjust Zoe’s expectations. “I haven’t been involved in the camp for years. I can’t even say that I’ll be here the entire summer, let alone have any kind of influence over my father and the camp. I don’t belong here anymore.”

  “It surprises me that you’d say that. I mean, obviously I don’t know you all that well, but as an outsider looking in, I’d say this place fits you like a glove.”

  The truth was, being with the kids and seeing them flourish felt to Alex like crawling back into a comfortable skin. But the terror she ran from lived there too. There wasn’t room in her head for both. “Things aren’t always as they seem.”

  “Hello and good morning!” Alex turned her attention up the hill toward the back of the main office building as Sally stepped through the sliding screen door and closed it. The woman practically bounced down the hill.

  “I don’t think we’ve met.” She put out a hand to Zoe. “I’m Sally Higgins and you must be the wildlife biologist.”

  “That’s me.” Zoe shook Sally’s hand.

  Alex smiled. “Sally is the town librarian, but I’d call her the town gem.”

  “How are the eagles doing?” Sally asked.

  “They’re doing very well so far. In fact, I was just on my way to go spend some time observing them. I was hoping I could talk Alex into joining me.”

  The muscles in Alex’s legs ached to be tested, and her body craved the morning jolt of endorphins that came from running. The idea of spending time with Zoe jousted with her body’s need for exercise. “I’m sorry. I’d love to,” she said. “But I’m fairly inflexible when it comes to making sure I get a run in every day. It helps keep me sane around all those kids.”

  “You’re going to need that sanity today, my darling,” Sally said

  “Oh, no.” Alex shook her head. “What do you have up your sleeve this time, Sally?”

  “Puppies.” Sally waved at the office. One of the camp counselors slid the door open, and seven tiny dogs barreled out. Buddy moseyed after them, barking whenever a puppy tried to veer off course. A gaggle of floppy ears, wagging tails, and determined canine faces—the epitome of happiness—roared toward them as Sally clapped her hands. “Come, my dears.”

  Alex and Zoe dropped to their knees and let the puppies crawl all over them. Their laughter blended with the playful puppy yelps.

  One of the puppies lunged into Zoe hard enough to push her off balance. Alex instinctively caught Zoe in her lap. Instead of releasing her, she wrapped her in a tight embrace. The sounds of the puppies and Zoe’s and Sally’s laughter filled her with a lightness she hadn’t felt in years.

  It didn’t take long, though, for the feeling to drop out beneath her. She found herself in a dark tunnel devoid of anything but Zoe. Her heart begged her to hang on. Her brain chided her not to taint Zoe with her darkness. She let go, but not before letting herself feel the softness of Zoe’s hands on hers. She stood, smoothed her tank top, and put her hands behind her back to hide the slight shaking.

  “I thought we could get the kids started on making those fashion collars today,” Sally said. The concern on her face suggested she had seen Alex disappear inside herself.

  “Yeah, sure.” Alex patted a puppy that licked her knee. “They’ll adore these guys.” She waited for Zoe to stand. “I’d love to go out and see the eagles with you sometime, but I have to leave now. It was good to run into you this morning.”

  Sally looked from Alex to Zoe and back. “Maybe Zoe would want to join us helping the kids.” To Zoe, she said, “You seem to enjoy puppies.”

  “Who doesn’t?” Zoe asked. “I’m not that good with kids, but I do love animals. I’d be happy to help. Just let me know.”

  “No, we shouldn’t bother you,” Alex said. “I know you’re busy. Besides, if you think sugar makes kids gonzo, wait until you see them around puppies. I’ll just catch you some other time.” She glanced at her watch and said to Sally, “I’ll be back in an hour or so. We can get started then.”

  Alex turned to do the thing she did best. Run away.

  Chapter 11

  Gentle swells rolled rhythmically under Zoe’s kayak near the wooded side of the island facing the camp. It had been several days since she last saw Alex. Of course, Alex was more than busy with the kids and the camp, but Zoe let self-doubt creep in and wondered whether Alex might be intentionally avoiding her. She chastised herself for enjoying being in Alex’s arms—literally falling into Alex’s arms—way more than she should. Maybe Alex had picked up on her feelings and been uncomfortable. What were you thinking, Kimball?

  Zoe raised a pair of binoculars and watched the eaglets. They chirped relentlessly, hungry for their mid-morning snack. She lowered the binoculars and jotted her observations in her field notebook. She scanned the other trees on the island for one or both parents. Given the young age of the eaglets, at least one parent would always be near while the other hunted for food.

  She pulled the visor of her Wildlife and Fisheries hat low to shade her eyes from the morning sun. “There you are.”

  A pure-white feathered head contrasted against the green needles of a tall pine not far from the nest tree. One of the parents sat perched on a branch two-thirds of the way up the tree. From what Zoe could observe from below, both eaglets appeared to be thriving despite the obvious difference in their sizes. The dutiful parents shared the responsibility of guarding and feeding their babies. They a
ppeared to be doing a good job. If she stayed long enough, the other parent would soon arrive with something to offer the eaglets’ hungry mouths.

  Sounds of a slowing motorboat and loud voices came from the back side of the island. Zoe guessed where the boat and its people might be landing based on the proximity of their clatter to the place where she floated in her kayak. When she heard the engine cut off, she tucked her field notebook into the dry-bag stowed at her feet and paddled toward the sounds.

  Two men struggled to drag a boat high up onto the narrow sliver of sand nestled between the rocks that circled the island. The two women with them carried a cooler. One of them had a blanket tucked under her arm.

  Zoe landed her kayak next to the boat. She rolled her eyes when she read the name on the boat’s stern, Looking for Trouble.

  “Sorry, lady, but we got here first,” the skinnier of the two men said. He must have noticed the logo on her hat. “Don’t worry. We have the required number of life jackets on board. I’ll show them to you if you’d like.”

  “That’s not necessary.” Zoe unfolded her petite body from her kayak and stood as straight as possible to her full height. She suspected she’d need every inch with this crowd. “The hat says Wildlife and Fisheries, not Warden Service. I’m a biologist, not a warden. I am going to ask you to leave, though.”

  The other man, whose belly hung over the waistband of his shorts, cocked his head. A thick clump of dark hair covered his chest. “I don’t see any No Trespassing signs, and the last I knew, this is a private island managed by a good friend of mine, James Bastone. We’ve been coming here for years. Who are you to tell us we have to leave?”

  What Zoe really wanted to say was that he ought to consider not walking around with his bare, mountainous midsection hanging out for the world to see. It really wasn’t a pretty sight. “I didn’t say I was telling you, but I’m asking you.”

  The big-bellied man glowered at her. “Why? Is there some rare weed growing in the bush that you’re trying to save? Tell us where it is, and we’ll be sure not to step on it.”