Under My Skin

by Juno Dawson

  He grinned. ‘Oh God, I’m a terrible dancer.’

  ‘I sure hope that’s false modesty, because you know what they say about boys that can’t dance …’ Sally gasped, Molly Sue held her nerve with a sly smile.

  Todd blushed. ‘Sally, would you like to dance?’

  ‘What would Mels say?’

  ‘Melody isn’t here and she doesn’t own me.’

  ‘Correct answer. I’d love to.’

  Kyle’s band had one slowie and they chose that moment to play it. ‘Looks like we’ve entered the Erection Section,’ Molly Sue mumbled out of Todd’s earshot.

  ‘I never know what to do.’ Todd slipped his arms around her waist like two wet noodles.

  Molly Sue hooked her arms around his thick neck. Sally looked helplessly on, wallflower at her own first slow dance. ‘You just sway.’

  The singer hunched over the microphone like he was in great pain, singing about bleeding out of his heart. Todd looked uncomfortable to say the least, unsure of where to look. He leaned in close to her ear. ‘How am I doing?’

  ‘You’re doing good. There’s nothing to it … just hold me tight and don’t step on my feet!’ He tightened his arms and the space between them shrunk. They now swayed hip to hip; her head on his broad, strong shoulder. Heat radiated from him, his shirt smelling of lavender fabric conditioner and his almost lemony aftershave. Sally blazed with jealousy. Molly Sue had stolen her moment. ‘This feels good,’ she muttered to herself more than Todd. ‘It’s been a while …’

  Todd melted into the dance, his self-consciousness fading. They were in a sea of dancing couples, although few were as beautiful and graceful. She felt his jaw brush her hair. Molly Sue looked up to find him ready, poised, looking into her eyes. He wanted to kiss her – well, who wouldn’t? Sally screamed although no noise came out. It was like being in those nightmares where you can’t control your legs and they keep walking towards the edge of the cliff.

  ‘You smell so good,’ Todd whispered, licking his lips.

  Molly Sue smiled a carnivorous smile, their mouths almost touching. Sally felt his breath on her lips. She cried with frustration, stuck behind her two-way mirror.

  Todd pulled away, dropping his hands from her hips. ‘Sorry, Sally, I can’t.’

  Molly Sue rolled her eyes. ‘You’re scared of her.’

  ‘Aren’t you?’

  ‘No. And if you don’t got the boy bits to dump that junkyard dog, you’re no good to me.’ Molly Sue shot him a poison glance and walked away, the crowd parting. Kyle’s band finished their set to applause. She had work to do.

  Todd followed her. ‘Aw, come on, don’t be like that …’

  Molly Sue, wearing Sally, turned back to face him. ‘Choice is yours. I’m an only child, don’t do sharing. Never did play well with others – least of all Melody Vine. You know where to find me if you want to dance again sometime.’ She gave him a dazzling, suggestive smile and lost herself in the crowd. Todd could only watch her go.

  Now, where was Kyle? She fought her way to the front as most people headed to the bar while the next band set up. Sally guessed that they’d be packing up their instruments by now and evidently so had Molly Sue. Checking she hadn’t been seen, she slipped through the stage door like she was made of silk.

  The two bands met in the middle with much self-congratulatory back-slapping and high-fiving. Molly Sue hovered in the shadows. The lead singer caught sight of her, his eyes tracking up and down her legs. ‘Ruh-roh, a groupie got in.’

  Sally got the distinct impression Molly Sue did not like that. ‘You caught me!’ she said through a forced smile.

  ‘Sally?’ Kyle squinted at her. ‘What are you doing here?’

  ‘Just wanted to say well done, I thought that was … real special.’

  ‘Dude, she’s smokin’,’ the drummer muttered loudly on purpose.

  She ignored him. ‘You want a drink?’ Molly Sue asked sweetly. ‘I convinced the bar boy I was over eighteen.’

  ‘Sure. I’ll have a vodka and Red Bull.’

  ‘Cool. How ’bout I meet you on the terrace?’

  Sally saw her secure two drinks and then sneak out through a fire exit onto the terrace that backed onto the lake. It was designed that way so boaters could pull into the jetty and then get drinks or food when they were out for the day on the water. On summer days, this terrace would be packed, but right now the tables and parasols were packed away.

  The indigo night was cool now, Molly Sue balanced the drinks on the safety rail and wrapped her arms around her body. She looked out over the rippling lake and felt the wind in her face. She seemed to drink in the pine-tinged air, savour it, the way Sally’s dad sipped his red wines. Sally wondered how long it had been since Molly Sue had last tasted the night air. Her moment was interrupted by Kyle bursting out of the fire escape. Molly Sue forced herself to smile. ‘Hey. Here’s your drink.’

  ‘Thanks, Sally. I can’t believe you came to my gig. Is Jennie here?’

  ‘No, I came by myself. Why don’t we go for a little walk?’

  ‘Sure!’ The look on his face made it very clear what he thought the walk was a prelude to. The shitweasel. Although she’d have thought it impossible, Sally hated him that little bit more. The terrace led down to the jetties, the boats clinking against their moorings.

  ‘Basically,’ Molly Sue started, ‘I wanted to have a word in your ear.’

  ‘Yeah? What’s up? Is it Jennie?’

  Molly Sue gave him her most dazzling smile. ‘There’s no easy way to say this, but you’re gonna break up with her.’

  He blinked hard. ‘What?’

  The smile dropped in a second. ‘You heard.’

  Kyle’s confusion switched to annoyance. ‘What’s it got to do with you? Mind your own fricking business.’

  He started to stomp back towards The Old Boat Shed, but Molly Sue blocked his path. ‘You made it my business when you hurt my friend.’ Sally was suddenly proud of Molly Sue. Maybe she’d made the right decision after all – she could have never spoken to Kyle like this.

  ‘What?’

  ‘You hit Jennie.’

  Kyle swore loudly, trying to step around her. ‘I never hit Jennie.’

  ‘OK.’ Molly Sue rolled her eyes. ‘Hurt her, then. I saw the bruises with my own eyes.’

  Kyle sneered at her. ‘Oh, for God’s sake, chill out, woman. You don’t know what you’re talking about. Get out of my way.’

  He shoved her out of his path, hard, almost sending her into the lake. Molly Sue grabbed hold of his sleeve and spun him back around. ‘Woman? Did you call me woman and then put your hands on me?’

  ‘What?’

  Through windswept curls, Molly Sue’s eyes blazed. She glared at him so hard it hurt. ‘I said, did you just put your stinkin’ hands on my body without permission?’

  He looked at her like she was speaking in tongues. ‘You’re not right in the head. I always knew you were mental.’ He started to walk away again, the planks creaking under his feet. Molly Sue stooped to the nearest boat, a simple rowing boat, and unlatched an oar. It was an old-fashioned, wooden one; painted and chipped.

  Sally held her breath.

  It took her three elegant strides to catch up with him. Molly Sue raised the oar like a baseball bat and swung for the back of his head. Her arms shook as she struck him. There was moist crack like an egg breaking. Kyle, quite literally, hit the deck.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Molly Sue dropped the oar into the water and froze. The jetties were deserted and quiet save for the undulating bass rattling through The Old Boat Shed. The main act was now playing and nearly everyone had gone back inside. There were some voices – probably people in the smoking area, but that was out of sight around the front of the venue.

  No one had seen her hit Kyle.

  Sally looked on, impotent.

  Molly Sue, however, sprung to life. She crouched alongside Kyle’s still body and felt for a pulse in his neck. When Sally felt
his blood pumping she could have wept with joy until she saw a red-black puddle pooling on the wooden slats. Without hesitation, Molly Sue hooked her hands under Kyle’s armpits and reversed, dragging him along the jetty. She tugged him as far as the nearest rowing boat, which she stepped into before hauling him on board too. The little boat rocked violently, the water glugging and sloshing up the sides. Molly Sue gripped the rim to stop herself tumbling into the lake.

  If Molly Sue had a plan, she wasn’t letting Sally hear it. She could only watch. Was she just going to leave him in the boat for dead? Apparently not; Molly Sue wiped her blood-splattered hands on her T-shirt and cast off from the jetty. She sat in the rower’s seat, taking the oars. With strong, confident strokes, Molly Sue crossed onto the darkest part of the lake, away from the lights and laughter of The Old Boat Shed. Kyle was a crumpled rag doll in the bottom of the boat, blood seeping into his grey vest. From somewhere inside his coat, a phone beeped as a text arrived.

  When they were far enough out to be invisible, Molly Sue paused and rummaged through his pockets. She found the phone and, without a second thought, tossed it overboard. The image was just as Sally remembered it – the handset being sucked into the dark water with a hungry plop.

  Molly Sue continued to investigate. The first thing she found was the old-school cigarette lighter. Very rock star – Kyle was such a poser. Molly Sue flicked it open and a fat orange flame leaped up at her face. ‘Nice. Finder’s keepers.’ She slipped it in her own pocket. In his inside pocket she found a retractable blade. ‘Oh you bad, bad boy. Let’s put this somewhere where you can’t go hurtin’ yourself.’ Molly Sue’s own accent was slipping out now and it sounded ever weirder. She pocketed the knife as well.

  She took the oars and kept rowing, using muscles Sally didn’t know she possessed. Sally realised after a few minutes Molly Sue was steering them towards Cormorant Island. Before she knew it, the rowing boat was grinding against the shingle beach. Molly Sue climbed out and heaved the boat up the beach where it was in no danger of drifting away. It was a good thing Kyle lived off cigarettes and Diet Coke because he was already heavy enough. Getting his prone body out of the boat was no small feat and she kept slipping over into the slick mud. By the time she got Kyle onto land, she looked like she’d survived an apocalypse movie – it was no wonder her clothes had been in such a state; she was covered in cormorant crap.

  From the boat, Molly Sue untied the mooring rope and coiled it over her shoulder. Once more, Molly Sue grabbed Kyle under his arms and dragged him up the beach and into the trees. This was harder, she had to navigate exposed, twisting roots and the slope to get him to higher ground. As soon as they were out of sight, hidden by the forest, she let him fall. Filthy and exhausted, Molly Sue dug deeper and found the strength to shove him up against a slender tree trunk. She sat him upright and twisted his arms behind the tree before tying his wrists with the rope. Worryingly, she was something of a knot expert and Sally wondered where she’d picked up that talent.

  A ragged Molly Sue fell back against the opposite tree to admire her handiwork. She got her breath back before crawling over to Kyle. She tapped his face. ‘Wakey, wakey, sunshine …’ She slapped him a little harder. ‘Rise and shine!’ His head lolled to one side. ‘Oh, don’t you go and die on me, you louse.’

  She felt the gash on the back of his head. It wasn’t too bad, a surface wound. Molly Sue screamed ‘Wake up!’ in his face and this time he stirred.

  ‘What are you doing? My head … oh, God … my head really hurts.’ His eyes opened and he tried to get away, struggling against her knots. He wasn’t going anywhere.

  ‘It will do. I hit you with an oar.’

  Kyle was wide awake now, pulling and tugging on the ropes. He kicked out at her, trying to rise to his feet. ‘Sally, what are you doing? You have to let me go! You can’t do this!’

  ‘And yet I did.’

  ‘God, you’re a psycho!’

  Sally slapped him hard around the face and he yelped in pain. ‘So predictable. It’s not that I’m stronger or smarter than you, it’s that I’m a psycho. Guess again, buddy boy.’

  ‘Help! HELP!’ he screamed.

  ‘I wouldn’t bother. You’ll only get yourself hoarse.’

  ‘HELP!’

  This time Molly Sue reached into her jacket and whipped out the blade. The steel gleamed in the moonlight. ‘I said, I wouldn’t bother. Quit your bawlin’ before I give you something to really bawl about.’

  Kyle’s eyes widened. He looked terrified and Sally pitied him. She knew she shouldn’t, he’d hurt her friend, but she couldn’t help it – he was so helpless.

  ‘That’s better. Now let’s finish that talk we started.’

  Kyle was now crying. ‘What do you want? P-please don’t hurt me.’

  ‘Well, now, that depends on your answers, don’t it?’

  ‘What’s up with your voice?’

  ‘I’ll do the questions. Number one: what did you do to Jennie?’

  ‘Nothing!’

  Molly Sue stepped around his flailing legs and held the knife under his jaw. ‘Try again.’

  ‘OK! OK! God!’ Kyle flinched away, tears rolling down his face. ‘We got into a fight! We fell out about something, I can’t even remember what. You know … you know … you don’t know what she’s like … she gets really angry! I had to hold her to get her off me!’

  Molly Sue pressed the blade further into his face and this time it drew blood. Little red beads. ‘Do you really wanna pull that thread? I know you aren’t gonna try to pin this on a girl who weighs the same as a prairie rat.’

  ‘I’m not! I’m not! I’m sorry! I … I shouldn’t have … I didn’t mean to …’

  ‘Didn’t mean to what?’

  ‘I didn’t mean to hurt Jennie.’

  ‘But you did.’

  ‘I know! And I’m sorry.’

  ‘Did you tell her that?’ His silence said that he had not. Sally wasn’t thrilled with her method, but Molly Sue was getting the job done. ‘OK, so now we just gotta work out what the punishment’s gonna be.’

  ‘What?’

  What? Sally thought. You’ve got what you wanted – he admitted it! Now let him go! She had to cling to the fact she’d seen him alive and well – or well-ish – that morning at school.

  ‘You didn’t think I was going to let you get away with hurting that girl, did ya?’

  ‘Please … please, Sally, you don’t want to do this.’

  Molly Sue’s face twisted into a manic grin. ‘Oh, but I really do. See, I think there’s way too many parasites like you getting away with it every single day. Boys who think it’s OK to beat on girls half their size. Tell me, Kyle, did it make you feel like a big man?’

  ‘No!’

  ‘Did you like the power Kyle? Did you feel all manly?’

  ‘Please, just let me go!’

  Please, just let him go, Sally echoed.

  Molly Sue let the hand with the knife fall to her side. She ran the tip of the blade oh-so-slowly up his inside thigh, heading straight towards his crotch. ‘Maybe I should turn you into a girl,’ Molly Sue mused airily. She gritted her teeth and jabbed the knife through the denim. Kyle cried out with horror, now sobbing with fear. ‘Maybe then you’d know how it feels. How it feels to walk down the street and have men gawp at you, thinking you’re something they can buy and own. How it feels to be hungered and ignored at the same time. How it feels to be disposable. Maybe then you’d know how it feels to have men look at you and see you as somethin’ less than they are because you don’t got this dangly bit of meat between your legs.’

  ‘Please!’ Kyle’s scream shook the birds out of the trees. ‘Please, stop!’

  Molly Sue smiled and retracted the blade. ‘Lucky for you that’s not what a woman is. We aren’t lacking anything, hon. We’re not men without dicks. We’re not holes for you to fill.’

  Kyle’s eyes were wild and wide with fear. ‘I know. I … I don’t hate girls. I don’t!’
<
br />   ‘You won’t now because you ain’t going anywhere near one. Got that? If I even see you within two metres of a girl at school, I will hurt you in ways you can’t even imagine. That clear?’

  ‘Yes. Yes … please … just let me go.’

  Molly Sue assessed him pityingly. ‘No.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Big clever man like you should be able to make your own way home. It’ll give you some time to think about how you treated my little friend.’

  Kyle looked at her incredulously, testing Sally’s sympathy. ‘You can’t … you can’t just leave me here.’

  Molly Sue walked away, treading over the roots towards the shore. She tossed the dagger into the lake. ‘You have twenty-four hours to break up with Jennie.’

  ‘If you leave me here, I’ll die!’ Kyle cried.

  Molly Sue just shrugged. ‘Oh, shucks. Either way, you won’t be with Jennie.’ She steered the rowing boat to the water’s edge and climbed aboard. She cast off, smiling so widely, her cheeks ached.

  ‘Can I get you anything?’ the waitress loomed over Sally in her booth at the diner.

  ‘W-what?’

  ‘I said, do you want anything else to drink?’

  Sally blinked, readjusting to the real world. ‘No. No, thanks, I’m fine.’ The waitress gave her a stinky look before skulking back to the counter.

  Oh my God, he could have died out there!

  ‘But he didn’t. We just saw his sorry ass,’ Molly Sue said far too casually.

  That’s not the point – you had no way of knowing! What were you thinking? That was TOO MUCH! If he’d died, it would have been me who went to jail!

  ‘Girl, where you go, I go. But it don’t matter now, does it? He’s fine. A little beat up, but fine. I think he learned his lesson.’ She sounded almost gleeful.

  Sally’s mouth was desert dry. It was more than that. It had gone so much further than teaching Kyle a lesson. Molly Sue had enjoyed torturing him.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Not wanting to attract any more attention to herself than necessary, Sally was about to return for her afternoon lessons when her phone rang. The display said it was Jennie. ‘Hi, Jen —’ Sally was cut off by what sounded like whale song. ‘Jennie, are you OK?’