Trust Me, I Hate You

by Romeo Alexander

  “We’ve been ordering takeout for days now, what’s going to stop us?”

  Aidan snorted, thinking that they were going to be in for some serious workouts ahead of them if they kept ordering their food from restaurants. As he looked over the naked man half-sprawled on top of him, and the other half on the couch, he wondered if maybe that wouldn’t be necessary. The two of them had spent the past few days making up for lost time with a great deal of enthusiasm and abandon.

  “That will still involve putting on shorts, though,” Aidan pointed out.

  “Yeah, that cute delivery guy stopped showing up. The girl who showed up the last time looked like she was barely out of high school. I’m not going to risk traumatizing her.”

  Aidan leaned forward, peering down at Sean’s face. “Cute delivery guy?”

  Sean smirked. “Little guy, nice smile, seems to like delivering around here.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Sean looked at him, the corner of his mouth twitching. “Are you getting jealous?”

  Aidan blinked. “No.”

  “I think you might be.”

  Was he bothered that Sean had decided to call someone else cute while Aidan was sitting right there? Jealousy wasn’t exactly a foreign emotion to Aidan, he’d felt it before, though it had been years since he’d experienced the sensation. Then again, it had also been years since he’d ever felt a pull toward someone like he did with Sean. Which was especially interesting considering how much they had also pushed at one another in the beginning.

  Push and pull, and now they were finally settling on the pull.

  Aidan grunted. “Fine. Maybe a little.”

  Sean pushed him onto his back, chuckling as he did so. Aidan put up only token resistance, enough to make sure he wasn’t pushed over immediately, but not enough to make Sean think he wasn’t into it. Despite being a little tired and a bit sore, he was more than happy to have Sean’s weight bearing down on him. The man was a damn furnace naturally, and his skin felt incredibly warm pressed against Sean’s. Well, and it triggered the part of Aidan that got a little hot and heavy at the idea of being held down, something Sean was fond of doing now that he knew Aidan loved it.

  “Don’t be,” Sean said.

  Aidan raised a brow. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I feel this is the point where I should note we’re not exactly...well, we don’t actually know what we are.”

  Sean cocked his head. “Would you feel less jealous if we were officially dating?”

  Aidan opened his mouth, realizing he didn’t know what the answer to the question was, and clamped his lips together. They’d only known each other for a month or so, and only in the last few weeks had they put any effort into getting along.

  No, that wasn’t it.

  They had never had to work to get along, Aidan realized. From the very start, the two of them had been actively working against getting along. They hadn’t learned how to get along in the past month, they had just learned how to stop fighting each other non-stop, and to look with less stubborn, and hotheaded eyes at one another.

  “I...don’t know actually. Probably not,” Aidan admitted.

  Sean lay a gentle hand on Aidan’s cheek, stroking his thumb in slow circles. “Alright, I won’t make comments about other people.”

  Aidan grunted. “I don’t need you to hold my hand, Staff Sergeant.”

  “I’m not holding your hand. If it makes you uncomfortable because we’re not something you can feel stable with or something you’re confident in, then I’m not going to do it. Fuck knows we spent enough time at each other’s throats before this. I’m not going to fling it back to square one over something so trivial.”

  It was one of the most reasonable things he thought he’d heard anyone say, let alone the stubborn and usually combative team leader Aidan had first met. It still left Aidan feeling a bit like he was being unreasonable, but at least, as far as he could tell, Sean wasn’t making him out to feel that way.

  It went some way toward making him feel the same confidence Sean mentioned, and that was a nice bonus.

  Aidan sighed. “Okay.”

  It wasn’t some grand proposal, but Aidan didn’t feel the urge to try and argue the point. Plus, his agreement brought a warm look of contentment to Sean’s face, and Aidan was starting to get used to the sight.

  Sean kissed Aidan’s collarbone, nuzzling into his neck. “I’ve been...enjoying what we’ve got going on right now. I’m not in any rush to make this more than we’re ready for.”

  It was exactly the sort of thing Aidan needed to hear, and he could feel his twisting nerves begin to settle. It didn’t hurt that he was already growing familiar with the sensation of Sean touching him, and how far it went toward making him feel comfortable. Aidan didn’t think it was Sean intentionally manipulating him, which he might have once suspected. He had honestly come to accept that what was happening was purely genuine.

  Aidan said nothing, laying back and closing his eyes as Sean continued to lay on top of him. Their bodies fitted just right together as he listened to Sean’s breathing, feeling the man’s hand stroking his side and down over his hips. It was so unbelievably peaceful and utterly civilian, and Aidan was willing to soak up every last second of it.

  Until he felt a familiar presence pushing against his thigh.

  Aidan chuckled, reaching down to squeeze Sean’s hip. “Really? Aren’t you tired yet?”

  “I swear, it’s just from the cuddling, I’m not thinking dirty thoughts.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “Okay, maybe now there’s a dirty thought or two.”

  Aidan cracked his eyes open. “Oh? Like what?”

  Sean smirked, inching his face closer. “I might be thinking of me fucking you against the shower wall last night.”

  Aidan tilted his head back. “That’s a good memory.”

  “It was a good nap afterward, too.”

  “That it was.”

  Sean leaned in closer, his breath brushing against Aidan’s lips. “We might need another shower soon.”

  “A shower,” Aidan repeated with a raised brow.

  Sean hummed in acknowledgment, leaning down to kiss Aidan. Giving a low sigh of appreciation, Aidan wrapped his arms around the man’s neck and pulled him down into the kiss. His hips shuddered, grinding against Sean as his own now hard cock rubbed against his flat stomach. He had a suspicion that by the time both of them managed to leave Sean’s apartment, they were going to be sore and tender all over.

  A strange rustling noise brought Aidan’s head back with a bewildered frown. It was only as he watched the front door to the apartment swing open that he realized that what he’d been hearing had been a set of keys in the lock. Before he could do anything but give a choked gasp, the other three members of their team poured into the room.

  Nick rolled his eyes. “I can’t tell when you’re being serious anymore.”

  “I’m stone-cold serious,” Matt said, frowning at his best friend.

  “Anyone who thinks the movies did a better job of telling the story of Lord of the Rings is obviously brain-damaged. Which to be fair, we already knew about you,” Nick shot back.

  “They were absolute masterpieces that managed to take everything Tolkien rambled on about for thousands of pages and made it coherent and enjoyable!”

  “If you like the cliff notes versions, sure.”

  Matt huffed, turning to Ricardo, who was no longer distracted by the argument and was staring at Aidan and Sean. “Ricardo, tell him the movies are better.”

  Ricardo cleared his throat. “Uh…”

  That was all it took for Matt and Nick to turn in bewilderment toward the couch. Aidan and Sean hadn’t moved, frozen in complete shock as they stared back at their now completely startled teammates.

  “Oh shit,” Matt managed with extreme eloquence.

  Nick averted his eyes with a laugh. “Damn you guys, what the fuck?”

  Sean snorted, pushing himsel
f upright. “What do you mean, what the fuck? You barge into my apartment and want to act shocked when you see something that a locked door is supposed to keep you away from?”

  Ricardo chuckled, holding up his key ring and a plastic bag. “We texted you about a movie night tonight. Like...two days ago.”

  “You did?” Sean asked in bewilderment.

  Matt snorted, covering his mouth. “I guess you’ve been a little preoccupied.”

  Aidan sighed, flopping back onto the couch. There was no point in trying to either hide himself or make excuses. Being naked around his team was a non-issue in Aidan’s book, you got used to it after a while. He and Sean had been caught naked, with Sean on top of him, and there was no hiding that. The only comfort he had left was the fact that the intrusion had killed both of their hard-ons, so at least they weren’t on total display.

  “I guess you took my advice,” Ricardo asked, trying and failing to hide his amusement.

  Sean stood up, somehow managing to look dignified despite his red face and complete nudity. “Was still working on it, actually.”

  “You were working on something,” Matt said, shooting a smirk to Aidan.

  “Until you walked in, yeah,” Aidan said in annoyance, sitting up.

  Nick groaned. “Oh, God. Please stop. I don’t...oh, Jesus.”

  “Problem?” Sean demanded of Nick.

  Nick peeked around, wincing. “Dude, I know you like dick, and I don’t care that Aidan likes dick. And I don’t care that you guys like each other’s dicks. I just don’t...I don’t want to think about it too much, okay? It’s weird. You’re the team leader and...I don’t want to think about it.”

  “Put on some pants, man. You’re traumatizing poor Nick,” Matt said, snickering as he spoke.

  “Bite me,” Nick hissed, shoving Matt.

  Matt looped his hand around Nick’s neck and pulled him down into a hold. “And I bet you’d like it too.”

  Nick flailed at him, trying to punch his side. “Let off!”

  Aidan snatched up his shorts from beside the couch, having been cast off at some point during the past few days. He should have known he and Sean’s little getaway from the world wouldn’t last forever. He honestly had no idea where Sean’s shorts had ended up, but he suspected they were still in the bathroom.

  Sean rolled his eyes as Nick and Matt thudded to the ground, still wrestling. “Make sure they don’t break anything.”

  Ricardo snorted, stepping over the two men without so much as a glance at them. Without hesitation, he flopped down on the end of the couch where Aidan and Sean had been laying only moments before.

  “So, is this a screwing thing, or something else?” Ricardo asked, raising a brow.

  “We’re still in the planning stages,” Aidan said, eyeing the man warily.

  “Meaning neither of you has figured it out.”

  “That’s what I said.”

  Ricardo smiled. “You don’t have to get defensive.”

  Nick panted from the ground, one of his arms holding him up, the other gripping Matt hard. “Yeah, c’mon. You’re both adults. And you’re getting along, so why not?”

  “They were doing it before they were getting along,” Ricardo said.

  “How did you…” Aidan began.

  Matt laughed, the sound weak as he got pinned to the ground on his back. “Oh shit! They were hate fucking? Nice.”

  Nick shoved at him. “Shut up!”

  “Is he weirded out by the whole gay thing?” Aidan asked, a little unsure.

  “No, he sees you both as like, brother figures,” Matt explained.

  Sean stomped into view, looking irritable. “That’s gross.”

  “Now you know why it weirds me out!” Nick cried as he was flipped on his side.

  Sean kicked lightly at them, and Aidan noticed the kicks were all aimed at spots that wouldn’t do any damage. “Quit it both of you. I don’t give a fuck if this place is a piece of shit, you don’t need to make it worse!”

  “He started it!” Matt protested, batting at Sean’s foot.

  “I don’t give a shit who started it! You’re both idiots.”

  “But we’re your idiots,” Matt beamed.

  “Forever and ever,” Nick added, smirking.

  Sean huffed, walking back into the kitchen. “Don’t remind me.”

  Aidan watched him go, speaking softly to Ricardo. “How much of that grumpiness is an act?”

  Ricardo chuckled. “I’m not brave enough to answer that.”

  Sean emerged again, eyeing Ricardo. “Smart man.”

  Nick lay flat on the floor of the hallway, breathing hard. “So, you two are like, not a thing, but a thing?”

  “We’re working on that,” Sean grunted, flopping down gracelessly beside Aidan.

  Nick sighed. “Okay, but like, can you please make sure not to like...screw on the couch when we’re over, please?”

  “You walked into my apartment!” Sean shot back.

  Ricardo held up a finger. “Had we known, we wouldn’t have.”

  “Well, now you know!”

  Aidan frowned, looking around. “You guys, really don’t give a shit? I mean, it’s technically against…”

  Matt laughed, pushing himself to sit with his legs spread out before him. “Like we give a shit if it’s against the rules. I don’t care if you guys are just fucking, or if it’s getting serious. If it makes you happy, and you’re both game, what do I care? Just don’t do all the shit you guys were doing before.”

  Nick snorted, getting onto his knees. “Seriously. You two at each other’s throat was the worst thing.”

  Ricardo shrugged. “So long as I don’t have to see you guys rubbing dicks together again, I don’t really give a shit.”

  Aidan smiled, knowing it looked evil. “So, I shouldn’t tell you that there aren’t too many surfaces left in this apartment that are clean?”

  Nick’s eyes widened. “I’m fine...right?”

  Aidan looked down at him, eyeing the spot as if in thought. “Mmm...it’s been a lot, so it’s hard to keep track.”

  Sean tapped a red mark on Aidan’s knee. “That’s rug burn. It might have been where he’s at.”

  “Ooh, good point.”

  Nick leaped up. “Not funny!”

  Aidan snorted. “I bumped my knee in the shower earlier, calm down, it’s not rugburn.”

  Nick sagged in relief. “Thank God.”

  “I bumped it after Sean bent me against the wall,” Aidan continued.

  “Goddammit!”

  Laughter filled the apartment as everyone but Nick burst out laughing. It was the first time Aidan thought he’d ever heard the whole team laugh together in earnest since the forest, and somewhere inside him, he realized they were all going to be okay.

  He and Sean might still have to work a few things out, but if the warm, happy gleam in the man’s bright eyes was any sign, they would get there. And they would get there together, with their team at their backs the whole way through.

  Epilogue

  Six Months Later

  The ground crunched under the soles of his thick boots as he marched along. Aidan kept his progress steady, though he was tempted to weave between the tents and temporary buildings that made up the base. The desert sun pounded down on him from above, but he kept going, telling himself he could collapse once he got back to his bed.

  He was absolutely exhausted and ready to collapse into bed and sleep for as long as they would let him. He and the rest of Team Maelstrom had been kept busy from the moment they’d landed a few months ago. Having proven themselves in General Winter’s little test, albeit with a messy landing, Command had decided they were fit for service again and thrown them back into the Middle East.

  Not that Aidan was complaining, it was nice to be working again, to have his sense of purpose back. But if they weren’t sending them out to scout unknown areas, rooting through trouble zones or following up on intel, they were being forced to help train some of the oth
er soldiers at the base. As much as Aidan liked being kept busy, he was ready for at least one day to himself.

  He kept his upright stance until he pushed through the front door of the temporary building that made up Team Maelstrom’s barracks. Aidan wasn’t completely sure what had happened that made it so the guys in charge thought a five-man team needed a building to themselves, but he suspected Sean had been somehow involved. It wasn’t a large building, with only three rooms splitting off from the main room. Each room wasn’t very big, and the bedrooms had just enough space for a bunk bed and their lockers.

  Not that Aidan spent much time in his own bunk anyway.

  Matt was sprawled out on the couch that sat at the center of the main room. It was a testament to how tired he was that the man had a few electronic gadgets around him, but they were laid out on the table, untouched.

  “Please tell me we’re safe for the moment,” Matt groaned.

  Aidan snorted. “They’re going to leave us be for at least a day.”

  “Oh, thank God, I want to pretend to be dead for the next twenty-four hours.”

  Aidan looked around. “Where are the rest?”

  Matt pointed around as he explained. “Ricardo’s already out cold, told me that somebody had better be dying if he’s going to get woke up. Nick went to grab us some food so we don’t have to leave later. And I don’t know what Sean’s doing, but he’s in your room.”

  Aidan sagged. “Thank God for that.”

  Matt smirked, adopting a slight baby voice. “Aww, someone need a little TLC from their boyfriend?”

  “When I have the energy to kick your ass, I’m shoving my foot deep. Until that time, fuck off,” Aidan grumbled, flashing the man the finger.

  Nick chuckled, flopping back against the arm of the couch. “Love you too.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” Aidan grumbled as he walked past him and into his and Sean’s shared room.

  He stopped in the doorway as he spotted Sean on the bottom bunk. The man was sprawled on his back, his boots still on. Aidan smiled, knowing that Sean had just “laid down for a second” and passed out cold.

  Aidan closed the door gently behind him and walked up to Sean’s sleeping figure. Despite having just collapsed, Sean looked peaceful. The worried crease that liked to show up a little too often was gone from his brow, and his normally stiff shoulders were relaxed. There were few people who got to see Sean like this, as even asleep or taking a nap out in the field, Sean looked stiff and almost irritated.