Psycho: A Dark College Romance (Hillcrest University Book 4)

by Candace Wondrak

  And why would we? Why would my parents have suspected anyone other than Declan? Why would I? Sabrina and Declan were together, at least until a week before her death. They’d been dating on and off for years.

  I sat on the side of my bed, my fingers curling in the fluffy comforter. Not even the familiarity of my bedroom could calm me down. My eyes glanced at the closed door before slowly moving to the mahogany nightstand standing beside my bed.

  Fuck. I…I needed it. Just this once. Just to calm me down. Just to…stop me from going off the rails with what that note could mean.

  I was on my knees in front of my nightstand the next moment, my hand squeezing beneath it. This wasn’t my house. When I lived here, I got creative. Travis thought he searched the room once we got here, but the fool should know that an addict always had backups, and backups for backups.

  They were old, but they’d work. They’d do the job.

  My fingers felt the small plastic baggie I’d taped to the bottom of the nightstand, hidden from everyone’s view. You had to really get in there to reach it, too. I pulled it out.

  One. I should only take one.

  No.

  More.

  I needed all of them. There were only three in there, after all. That wasn’t a huge dose for me. I’d taken more and been able to walk home before.

  My willpower to keep myself in check was gone, vanished the moment I read the note. That fucking note…how the hell was I supposed to feel—normal and happy? How was I supposed to go on as if nothing was wrong when I knew Ash was in that house?

  The note didn’t say Declan Briggs.

  It said D. Briggs.

  D. As in the Dean of Students at Hillcrest. As in Dean Briggs.

  And so, even though I knew I shouldn’t, I did the only thing I could do: I took the pills.

  Chapter Twenty-Four – Ash

  Mom coming was a huge deal, apparently. Everyone had to wear their best—which included Will and Declan wearing nice button-up shirts that made their shoulders seem squarer, and Dean Briggs a sweater vest. Yes, a sweater vest. I would’ve laughed, but Mom would kill me. Mom herself showed up in nice pants and a blouse I knew she got from Goodwill. Still, she looked good. She even wore a bit of makeup. Helen Bonds was actually trying to impress. I didn’t know whether to be weirded out or proud of her.

  She needn’t have impressed anyone though, because I was already in Hillcrest. No more ass-kissing necessary.

  With the long dining table full of food that us five certainly wouldn’t be able to eat, we were having a nice enough Thanksgiving. It felt too lavish though, like, deep down, I felt like I didn’t belong here. Mom and I used to have TV dinners, the kind you threw in the microwave and all that, unless it was a holiday. The only time I got real cooked meals was when I went over Kelsey’s house, and even that was no comparison to this. Kelsey might’ve had two parents, but they were not that much better off than us.

  They did live in a house, though. That was something.

  Mom had hugged me the moment she saw me, pulling me close and whispering how much she missed me, how we didn’t talk as often as we should, blah, blah, blah. It was nice, great to see her, but a part of me hated that I felt like I was putting her in danger by being with her. With Ray…well, you never really knew with that one. Surely he was plotting.

  Helen sat between me and the Dean, while Will and Declan sat across from me. I tried not to linger on their gazes too much, fearing my mom’s nosey glances would lead her to think that we were together. Even if we were, she didn’t need to know it.

  “The food looks good,” Helen commented. “Smells even better. Who did all the cooking?” She sent a teasing smile to Will and Declan, but it was Dean Briggs who answered.

  “I did. I like to cook, believe it or not,” he spoke with a smile, and I was struck by how good-looking of an older man he was. If that’s what I had to look forward to, assuming Will and Declan were still in my life, I’d be more than okay with it.

  Helen let out a sigh that sounded…almost flirty? “A man who likes to cook. Almost unheard of where we’re from.” The table was silent as everyone started to shove mountains of food onto their plates. Turkey, gravy, bread rolls, stuffing, all that good stuff.

  No chicken nuggets, unfortunately.

  “I’m surprised you’re not married,” my mom said, joking.

  “My wife…passed almost a decade ago,” Dean Briggs spoke, reaching for his wine glass. Everyone under the age of twenty-one, basically me and Declan, had their own glasses. We had water. Yummy. “I’ve done my best for these boys, just as you’ve done your best for Ashley.”

  I really hated how he called me Ashley and not Ash, but it wasn’t something I would correct.

  Helen threw me a smile. “She is something, isn’t she?”

  “Willful, strong, intelligent,” Dean Briggs rattled off, causing both Will and Declan to look at me. “Hillcrest could use more students like her. Next year, with Hillcrest officially accepting female students, I hope there will be.”

  Declan’s shoe touched me under the table, and I almost jerked away—but then I wondered: is he trying to play footsie with me? Was that something people did these days? I was so out of touch with everything, I didn’t even know. Ray had swallowed my life completely.

  “Your daughter is also very kind,” Dean Briggs went on, causing my mom to glance at me. “She helped William out when he was in dire straits. She’s a good friend to have, and I’m glad my boys have her.”

  William shot a look at Dean Briggs, though it was a look I couldn’t read, a look I didn’t know if I wanted to read. I mean, that was kind of a weird thing to say, wasn’t it?

  God, he wasn’t going to tell her about the whole car incident, was he? For all he knew, I’d already told my mom. There was no reason whatsoever to bring that incident up…mostly because it made me think of other related incidents. Namely Ray, and Will getting stabbed. Oh, and me being attacked in that basement.

  Helen said nothing as she reached for my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I did the best I could with this one,” she whispered, mostly to me. Thank God, she turned the tables on the Dean and started asking questions while we ate. “So Hillcrest is officially accepting other girls next year, huh? The trial run with Ash must be going good.”

  They then got into a long and boring talk about money and how Hillcrest would be more financially stable if it had a bigger student body. I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes at that, mostly because Hillcrest was doing just fine. It had plenty of money. I did hear Dean Briggs say they were going to rezone some buildings and do more construction over the next eight months to build more dorm buildings.

  Boring, boring, boring. Especially boring since my mind started to wander to the two brothers across from me. Declan’s foot still rested against mine, and I lifted my leg, drawing my foot along his calf. His cheeks immediately grew flushed, and I held back a chuckle.

  Man, those two looked amazing cleaned up. Travis would look drop-dead gorgeous in a shirt like that, too. And Sawyer, with his wide, muscular frame, would look sexy as sin, too. Sawyer was not who I should be thinking about, though.

  Once we’d eaten, once we were all leaning back in our chairs, our bellies full, Dean Briggs asked, “Are you sure you don’t want to stay tonight? We have plenty of room. It isn’t like you’ll be putting us out. I know it’s a few hours’ drive.”

  “No, but thank you. I have a shoot with some clients at nine tomorrow morning, and I’d rather make the drive tonight than early tomorrow,” Helen spoke, getting to her feet. She helped clean the table, which let me, Declan, and Will move into the living room, plopping on the same couch and turning on whatever football game was on.

  Their voices carried, and I heard Dean Briggs mention pie. My mom hated pie; pie wouldn’t make her stay.

  “That wasn’t too bad,” Will whispered, shooting me a look. He had his legs crossed, the nicely pressed pants making him seem even taller than he was, eve
n while sitting. He was a damn fine specimen of a man, with his light brown hair combed to the side.

  What I really wanted to do was cuddle with him or Declan, but I held back. It was super hard, but I managed. No setting off any alarms in either parent’s head. We were just friends. Nothing more. Maybe we could break it to Dean Briggs once Declan wasn’t my roommate? Eh, that was a problem for future Ash.

  Helen peeked her head around the banister, landing her eyes on us on the couch. “Hey, honey. I’m going to run. You want to walk me out?” I knew what that meant: walk me out. I’m not asking even though it sounds like I am. I knew my mom too well.

  I tossed the guys a smile before getting up, taking my mom to the giant front door. A house this large, this extravagant, I didn’t think I could ever live in one like it. It was nice, but weird. Too weird. So weird I couldn’t get past it. I mean, why did you need such expensive furniture? And who the hell needed a house with all this extra space?

  The air outside was cool, the sun setting in the horizon. My mom’s old van was parked near the front steps, and I held back a laugh. It wasn’t as rusted as Kelsey’s car was, but it still looked beat up and out of place sitting before a mansion like this.

  “They seem like good people,” Helen spoke, giving me a side hug as we walked down the steps. “I’m glad they’re nice. I was worried for a while that you were going to room with a dick on two legs who was going to try to take advantage of you.”

  Trust me, I remembered. My mom had also been kind enough to buy me a rape whistle, which I didn’t even have on me—ever. Call it intuition, but I didn’t think Batman would’ve stopped if I would’ve blown a whistle in his face. Travis had saved me that night; a whistle wouldn’t have worked at all.

  “Mom,” I whined, not wanting to ever hear her say the word dick again. There were just some words you didn’t want to hear come from your mom’s mouth. Dick and all of its variants were a few of them.

  “It’s okay, I trust you.” She gave me a smile as we stood in front of her van. Helen said nothing else before enveloping me in a hug. “I’ve always trusted you. You’ve made better decisions in your life than I did, and it’ll pay off for you. I know it,” she whispered into my hair. “You’ll land a big-wig job, a good man who’ll stick by you—”

  Good man, or good men? It was probably too much to hope that more than one of them would stick around, and also too early in the relationship. I remained quiet.

  Helen’s arms squeezed me one last time before letting go. She tucked some of her blonde hair behind her ear. “Hillcrest is a stepping stone, and I’m so proud of you. You do know that, right?”

  Oh, Jesus. This was…not a conversation I wanted to have with her right now. Her trusting me, her being proud…if my mom knew the truth, if she knew about Ray, she’d take it all back. I’d be the greatest, most heartbreaking disappointment of her entire life.

  But all I said was, “Yes.”

  Helen let out a sigh, saying, “I miss you, honey. I really do. Home isn’t the same without you, but I know you’ll move up to bigger and better things, and that’s really all a parent wants for their child.”

  I gave her another hug, whispering, “I miss you too.” And then, when the hug ended, my mom got into the van, waved, and drove off, leaving me. It wasn’t really much of a holiday, but it was better this way. Safer.

  If Ray was watching me, no one around me was safe. If he’d followed us here, then he’d seen everything that happened in the woods too. When we returned to Hillcrest tomorrow, I would put all my focus on him. Whatever he was planning would happen soon. If I had to kill my monster to defeat him, then…

  Then I guess that’s what I’d do, not that I was proud of it.

  Kill him. Double-tap him. Make sure he was really dead this time before running. No more mistakes.

  Ray Ruiz was a dead man walking.

  Chapter Twenty-Five – Travis

  I was silent for most of the drive back. At this point, it shouldn’t surprise me Sawyer had some pills stashed away. I thought I did a good sweep of his room, but apparently not. That, or he had some other hiding place in the house. It was a fucking huge house, and it wasn’t like I could turn everything upside down without his parents looking at me like I was crazy.

  All throughout dinner, Sawyer was fucking high. His pupils dilated to the extreme, and his words hardly made any sense. He was out of it, and both his parents noticed. It was why, today, I drove us back to the house a bit early. Not because we were returning early from Thanksgiving break like we planned, but because Sawyer’s father had all but forced his hand.

  Sawyer had to leave for a while, which was probably good for him. But that was the thing—I didn’t care about what was good for him. I only cared about how it would affect Ash. Ash was ticked at Sawyer for what he did with Kelsey, but him leaving? That was…it might hurt her, and the last thing I wanted to see was Ash hurt.

  When we pulled up to his house, I spotted a box near the front door. Sawyer practically dragged himself from the car, moving like a slug. Good, because it gave me time to grab the box and get in the house, hide it from him. And Ash.

  A second present from her psycho ex.

  As I bent to pick it up, I found it was a bit heavier than the one before. I tossed a quick look at Sawyer, who lagged behind me, carrying the bag he’d brought to his parents’ house, and said, “Hurry up. I want to get you there before noon.” The place he was going was over two hours away. Assuming Ash and the others were on their way here…they’d make it. She’d see him off.

  At this point, I didn’t know if that was a good thing or not. I was excited to see her again, though. It felt like ages, years since I laid eyes on her, even though it’d only been a few days. Mere days away from her felt like torture. That girl had my soul in her hand, and I didn’t care what she did with it, as long as she didn’t let it go.

  “I’m coming,” Sawyer muttered, picking up his pace.

  I stepped around the mail that had been shoved in through the slot on the front door, moving to hide the box behind me as Sawyer said nothing else and went up the stairs. I went to the kitchen, double and triple-checking to make sure Sawyer was upstairs packing before I lifted the lid and peeked inside the box.

  Oh, yeah. This one was heavier because there were more than a few petite fingers in it.

  This one held a whole fucking foot. Shoeless and sockless. Brooklyn was losing herself piece by piece; I couldn’t say I’d miss her, because frankly I wanted to kill the bitch for what she’d almost done to Ash, for what she did do to Ash, but this asshole beat me to it.

  I went outside and put it in the trunk of the car. I’d dispose of it after dropping Sawyer off. Ash would not receive any gifts from Ray, I’d make sure of it.

  As I closed the trunk, I reached into my pocket and dialed her number, heading back into the house. I heard Sawyer’s footsteps moving around upstairs, and I let him be. The fuckup knew there was no escaping this. If he didn’t go, Mommy and Daddy would cut him off. That was an ultimatum if ever I heard one.

  Ash answered on the third ring. “Hey,” she said, and I imagined her smiling as she spoke. “How was your Thanksgiving? Eat a lot of turkey?”

  “With ketchup,” I said. “Made me think of you.”

  She giggled. “Did you…did you find it?”

  “No. Her room was clean. There is…there is something else you should know, though.” I didn’t want to be the one to tell her about Sawyer. The dickwad earned the right to tell her himself. “Are you on your way back?”

  “Yeah, what is it?”

  “Just hurry, if you can.” I looked at the clock on the microwave in the kitchen. “Can you make it before ten?” It was just after nine now.

  “We’re ten minutes away,” she said, sounding unsure. “Travis, did something happen?”

  Something did happen. Something big, something all of us should’ve expected. Sawyer falling off the wagon. It wasn’t like I could take full responsibility for
him, because I couldn’t babysit him for the rest of his life. This…this was his mistake, and now he had to own up to it. I’d thought he was okay, but maybe me searching for Sabrina’s second diary triggered him, sent him spiraling.

  “Yes.” I said nothing more, hanging up. She called back immediately, but I didn’t pick up. She’d get here soon enough, and then…then she’d be able to see just what happened. Sawyer…there were no words for Sawyer anymore. Being ‘friends’ with him was exhausting.

  I went to sit at the kitchen table, my shoulders slumping. It was so much easier to be alone, to not have to worry about the well-being of others.

  It wasn’t too long before a heavy bag was dropped on the table, and I looked up, meeting Sawyer’s stare. He was more lucid than he was yesterday, but I could tell by his bloodshot eyes that he still felt a little out of it.

  “Come on,” he said. “Let’s go.”

  “No,” I told him, frowning, resisting my urge to go outside and smoke. At least my addiction was a legal one; it wouldn’t get me thrown in jail or arrested. “We’re waiting until Ash gets here.”

  A muscle in his jaw ticked. “I don’t want to see Ash.” A lie if I ever heard one, and I grew up around liars.

  “I don’t care what you want. I only care about what she wants.” Glaring, I added, “We’re staying, and there’s no way you’re driving yourself there.” His parents would be his emergency contacts once he was checked into the facility. It would be nice not having to worry about him.

  “Fuck you.”

  “No, fuck you. Fuck you for making everything about you,” I hissed, slowly getting up. Narrowing my eyes, I resisted my urge to hit him. It was one of the most difficult things I’d ever had to do in my entire life.