Better Together

by Jessie Gussman

  But her whole world had deflated when he’d admitted his nervousness had been because they had to keep pretending. Intensify their pretense. If the thought of continuing with their deception had been so fear-inducing, that kiss had the opposite reaction on him than it did her.

  She wanted to get closer.

  He wanted to run away.

  She refused to think about the pain in her heart.

  Right now, Wyatt needed her support. This thing with his dad had bothered him all his life.

  “I just don’t know how to get out of this.”

  “We could have a big fight. Break up at the party.” She almost laughed. She’d never fought with Wyatt. Ever. She’d barely ever seen him even close to being angry.

  “That might work.” Wyatt lifted his head, his eyes moving back and forth as though he were going over scenarios in his mind.

  Harper bit her lip and tried to push aside the hurt clawing at the back of her throat. It was a fake engagement. It would be a fake fight. A fake breakup.

  He stood, as though he wanted to pace, but remained tethered to the bed by their linked hands. “If I act totally unreasonable and somehow put you in a position where you’re saving face by breaking up with me.”

  “I don’t want to make you look bad.”

  “I know. But I’ll never see your dad again, and it doesn’t matter what he thinks of me.” Harper tried to keep her voice light.

  Wyatt shifted. “That doesn’t sit right.”

  “Maybe Steve or Carlos could play along, and I could be caught kissing them in the corner or something.”

  “No.”

  She wasn’t sure if that made him angry, but relief filled her that he’d shot that idea down.

  “So is this a practice fight for the real thing tomorrow?” She shouldn’t have said that. It reminded her too much of the “practice” kiss.

  “We’re not fighting.”

  “You sounded angry.”

  He sat on the bed, cradling her hand in his. “I am not going to have you kissing some strange man just so I can save face with my dad. It would be better to tell him first.”

  “Okay, fine. You tell him tomorrow. But,” Harper squeezed, “if you don’t get him told by the time the party is half over, we’ll figure out a fight to have, so we can break up.”

  “Deal. That should inspire me to stop being a wuss about this.”

  “You’re not being a wuss. You care about your dad, and you want him to care about you.”

  “Thanks, Pickles.”

  “Hey, it’s what you brought me down here for.” She rolled over onto her side. A goodnight kiss was probably out of the question, considering Wyatt acted like The Kiss had never happened.

  “You’re earning your keep, that’s for sure.”

  “We could fight about this whole bed thing.”

  “But you’re going to be nice to me, for once, and just sleep in the bed.”

  “For once? You are so delusional. You owe me, big time, Wyatt.”

  He froze in the act of getting off the bed. He leaned over, placing a hand on either side of her head. Her stomach fluttered. She pushed the sensation aside. He didn’t feel like that about her, and if she wanted to save their friendship, she couldn’t let him know how she felt.

  “I’m going to say something that I want you to forget by morning.”

  “Um, okay.” She half-laughed.

  “I had no idea you could kiss like that. Anytime you want to try it again, I’m in.”

  Harper’s eyes had widened, feeling like they might pop out of their sockets. Her mouth hung open. Her tongue wouldn’t work.

  Wyatt straightened and walked into the bathroom. Harper blinked after him, all thoughts of being able to sleep tonight disappearing. She definitely wanted to kiss Wyatt again, but she could hardly believe he was serious. Wyatt was constantly joking. Maybe this was his way of laughing off their kiss.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Wyatt was not in the room when Harper woke the next morning. Because the room was in the basement, and the windows were small and high, the morning sun didn’t come in. She couldn’t believe it was ten when she checked her phone.

  There was a message from Jeff. Got some good news about this fall. Meet me ASAP?

  Harper texted back that she could meet Tuesday. They were flying out Monday. His good news would have to wait until then.

  She should be much more excited about “good news” from the university. Why wasn’t she? She stopped brushing her teeth and stared at her face. It didn’t look any different than yesterday. But man-o-day, she felt different.

  Her skin seemed to glow and her eyes sparkled. After last night—the kiss, not the crevice—she could almost imagine a future with Wyatt. She definitely could imagine kissing him again.

  “Harper?”

  Harper’s face pinched over her toothbrush. There was no reason for Kayla to be in her room.

  She took the toothbrush out of her mouth and spit in the sink. “In here.”

  Thankfully, she’d made the bed before she changed her clothes. Someone, Wyatt, she assumed, had folded the comforter up and set it at the bottom of the bed along with his pillow.

  “Hey.” Kayla stuck her head in the door.

  Harper finished rinsing her mouth out and spit into the sink. “Good morning.” She met Kayla’s dark eyes in the mirror before turning. “I’m sorry I slept in so late.”

  “It was a late night.” Kayla’s eyes skittered away. She fingered the ends of her shirt.

  “And stressful.” Harper laughed.

  Kayla’s shoulders went up as she took a deep breath. “I wanted to apologize for that.”

  “Wyatt said you didn’t mean to.”

  She straightened. Harper got the feeling Kayla forced herself to meet Harper’s gaze. “I should have gone back.”

  Harper’s natural instinct was to forgive and sooth Kayla’s conscience. She smiled. “Well, thankfully Wyatt got us out.”

  “I was just scared of what I’d see. I didn’t want to go back by myself and have you two down there and nothing I could do.”

  “If we’d have gone down, I don’t think it would have mattered.”

  “Well. I’m sorry.”

  “Hey, no hard feelings. I’ll probably never snowmobile with you again, so nothing to worry about.”

  “Aren’t you moving back here with Wyatt?”

  Oops. “Uh, we haven’t really talked about it much.” That, at least, was the truth.

  “Hmm.” Kayla’s brows furrowed, but she didn’t question farther.

  Harper hurried to change the subject. For some reason, living the farce for Wyatt didn’t feel too much like she was lying, but saying things she knew to be untrue made her feel deceitful.

  “Wyatt said there was going to be a party tonight.” A hum that sounded like a sweeper moving sounded overhead. “Can I help?”

  “I’m sure you can.” Kayla smiled. Then her eyes clouded with uncertainly. “Are we good?” Her finger pointed between the two of them.

  “Yes. We’re fine.” Harper smiled reassuringly. “As long as you give me a job and keep me busy so I feel like family and not like a third wheel.”

  “Come on. I’m sure they can use you in the kitchen.”

  Harper nodded and followed Kayla out of the bathroom.

  Surprisingly, Harper had a great time in the kitchen with Kayla and Sophia. She’d thought they hoped Wyatt dumped her, but at least now she figured they’d want it to happen in the nicest way possible.

  She hated leaving before the work was done, but she wanted to look good for Wyatt tonight, so after the vegetables were chopped and the trays arranged, she thanked Sophia and went downstairs.

  After going through three changes of clothes, she at last settled on the one skirt she brought that Wyatt had once said “looked cute”—whatever that meant. She stood in the bathroom, putting the finishing touches on her makeup, wondering if Wyatt was even going to make the party since she hadn’t see
n him all day, when she looked in the mirror and saw him standing in the open doorway. His face glowed, although there were slight lines around his eyes where his ski goggles had dug into his skin. His cheeks were rosy, even over his tan, and his shoulders broad in his long-sleeved shirt. He still wore snow pants.

  Her hand froze. Her heart jumped. She forgot to breathe.

  His lips tilted up, wobbling a little as though he were just as uncertain of the status of their relationship as she was.

  He swallowed. “Hey.” It came out rusty and soft.

  “Hey yourself.” She turned around.

  “I couldn’t stop thinking about you all day.” His hands twisted his beanie cap, and he shifted his weight from one leg to the other.

  She held up her bandaged finger, the product of allowing herself to be distracted by him while chopping vegetables. “I was thinking about you, too.” Oh, if only he knew how she’d agonized over her deep desire to be home versus her knowledge that any chance she had of being with Wyatt would require her to move to Chile. Her thoughts had gone ’round and ’round all day, but in the end, she came to the same conclusion: if she wanted Wyatt, she would have to give up everything she worked for and leave her home and family.

  Concern darkened his gaze. He stepped forward and took her hand in his, lowering his head and twisting her hand to see the bandage from all angles. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded. Her stomach was a mass of curling nerves. This was Wyatt, her best friend. But he made her breathless.

  He looked back into her eyes, keeping hold of her hand, his thumb slowly stroking.

  “Man, Harper. I planned to play it cool and follow your lead. I didn’t—don’t want to ruin our friendship.” He looked away and blew a breath out, taking another deep one, before looking back at her. He swallowed. “Please tell me that you weren’t just thinking of me as your best friend. That it was more, that there’s more between us than friendship.”

  As his eyes, sincere, pleading, bore into hers, she could only tell the truth. “I was thinking of that kiss. I wanted to do it again.”

  He closed his eyes and groaned softly. Then he dropped her hand and his arms stole around her. He rested his forehead on hers and whispered fiercely, “I’ve been waiting ten years to hear you say that.”

  Shock sprang through her body. Her breath puffed out. “What?”

  His smile was self-effacing and he shook his head, his forehead rolling against hers. “I said, I’ve waited ten years to hear you say that.”

  She blinked rapidly, trying to comprehend what he had just said. “I had no idea.”

  “It’s the only thing I’ve ever been able to keep from you.”

  “Why? Why would you have kept it from me?”

  He pulled his head back and cupped her cheeks with his large hands. “Because you weren’t interested. All you saw when you looked at me were elbows and feet.”

  “That’s true at first…”

  “Then I was just your step-cousin and we had fun together.”

  “True…”

  “To be fair, though, you were too wrapped up in your books and studying to make time for romance.”

  With that statement, reality crashed down on her. Tenure, the university, his dad. They were headed in completely different directions. There was no way to work their future out.

  With the party due to start any minute, they didn’t have time to discuss it. “Are you going to kiss me?”

  His square jaw split into a grin. He jerked his head up. “Say it again.”

  “Dang it, Wyatt. Kiss me.”

  “My pleasure,” he murmured before his head descended. Their lips met, just as sweet, just as explosive as the first time.

  When his lifted his head, a long time later, their breaths came in pants. Their eyes met, and they grinned at each other.

  “I could gladly stand right here and do that all night long,” she said.

  Wyatt ran a hand down her cheek and along her jawline. Her breath hitched. She pushed her face into his hand, loving the contact.

  “But I’d better get out of here because there’s a party in your honor that is supposed to start any minute, and a lot of people have worked all day to make it very nice.” Somehow, Harper’s hands had gotten under Wyatt’s shirt and she skimmed her palms up and down his back, learning the hard ridges and dips. “Much as I would like to stay here, too.” She couldn’t believe she’d misread Wyatt for so long. Ten years.

  He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “I never got a chance to say anything to my dad.”

  “So we have to stage a fight?” At the idea of fighting in front of a roomful of people, fear tried to shove its clinging tentacles between them, but she held Wyatt tighter.

  “Yeah. I don’t know how. I don’t want you looking bad. I guess if an opportunity presents itself…” His voice trailed off and he shrugged. Then his eyes narrowed and he met her gaze again. “We need to have a conversation about where this is going.” He jerked his chin, indicating the two of them.

  “Well, tonight after the party, or we’re travelling all day tomorrow, going home. We could do it then.”

  “Sometime. I’m not asking you to come here.”

  “And I’m not asking you to stay in Pennsylvania.”

  He grunted. “It might be a short conversation.”

  That was it. No need to talk about it anymore. Still. “Let’s not ruin tonight with tomorrow’s problems.”

  His eyes crinkled. “It’s your brain that’s always been so appealing to me.”

  “Yeah, that’s what everyone says.” She rolled her eyes. “Hurry up and get ready, before they come looking for us.” She slipped out of his arms, and out of the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

  Wyatt stood in the great room, holding a glass of water. Icicle lights drooped from the ceiling, and a cheerful fire crackled in the huge stone fireplace. Low-hanging, rustic chandeliers added to the ambience. People mingled and talked, some attired in classic eveningwear, but most dressed in casual, but expensive, mountain wear.

  He’d been at parties here before, but somehow everything seemed different tonight. Maybe because this one was in honor of him and his girl.

  Harper fit right in with the soft brown leather skirt she wore. It was his favorite. He loved how it twirled around her legs, mid-calf, playing peekaboo with the tops of her brown boots. The rich, forest green shirt brought out the green in her gray eyes, and her hair, which was normally in a ponytail, lay down her back in a slick, shiny curtain. He wanted to spend the evening staring at her. He also wanted to run his hands through her hair.

  But he was expected to be the perfect son, mingling, talking, making people feel comfortable and entertaining them with stories from his travels and adventures.

  On one hand, he was trying to make the party go by without a hitch, on the other, he constantly searched for an opportunity to pretend to have a fight with Harper. Not that he wanted to.

  What he wanted to do was sit on the couch with her snuggled next to him and bask in the feeling that she finally, finally saw him as more than a friend. He also wanted to hash their future out, to see what kind of compromise they could work out. Harper hadn’t said anything, but he knew she was homesick, had been since they drove away from the farm. She longed for home, and he wasn’t sure she would be willing to leave it. It wouldn’t be right for him to ask her to. Maybe she would offer.

  “She’s glowing.” Sophia glided up to him, lifting a brow in Harper’s direction.

  He allowed his eyes to linger where they wanted. “Yeah.”

  “That near-death experience was good for your relationship. When you two first showed up, you were missing that spark of awareness. But now, you definitely look like a man besotted. And she like a woman in love.”

  Wyatt stilled.

  It seemed impossible, after all the years of waiting and hoping, that Harper could be in love with him. It was what he’d always wanted. Even though he knew a relationship could not happen,
it still thrilled him to think that the woman he loved for more than a decade might return his feelings. Sophia glanced at the large clock on the wall. He followed her gaze. It was almost nine.

  “Your father wanted to say a few words. Maybe you can steal Harper away from our neighbors and make your way to the fireplace. That’s where he was planning on speaking.”

  “Sure.”

  Wyatt took another sip of his water and moved through the crowd. Nerves balled in his stomach. He should have talked with his dad before this. There really hadn’t been time; they’d been busy with guests all day. And the idea of admitting he’d lied was repugnant.

  He shouldn’t have lied to begin with.

  He reached Harper’s side and slipped an arm around her waist, focusing on her warmth and softness, and on how good it was to finally be able to allow everything he felt for her to show on his face. No more worries about ruining their friendship.

  At least for now. At some point, they would have to make some hard choices if they couldn’t find a compromise. He still couldn’t see one. The thought made him clench his jaw. He deliberately loosened the muscles. It wasn’t something he was going to think about tonight.

  Harper looked up into his face. Her smile lit the room and he allowed his gaze to linger on her face before looking at Mr. and Mrs. Reegana, an older couple who lived in the village. “Excuse me, but I need to steal Harper away for a few minutes.”

  Mrs. Reegana winked at him. “Only for a few minutes.”

  Mr. Reegana said, “She’s a nice girl. You did well, son. It’s good to have you coming back. You breathe life into this place.”

  “Thanks.” Wyatt exchanged a few more pleasantries with them before tugging on Harper’s waist and leading her away.

  “Dad is going to say a few words, and he wants us standing with him.”

  “So, it’s a good time to pick a fight?”

  “Yeah. I haven’t been able to think of anything to fight over.”

  Harper looked around the room. She had always played by the rules, colored in the lines, and hated causing problems. But she hadn’t balked at him asking her to fight. With him. In public.