I head towards the spot where I said I’d meet Lily; I need to make sure she’s safe before I find Oberon. I don’t think I could handle it if anything happened to her. We climb the rocky road up the cliff to the high point between the two courts, I can’t see anything but trees, but I can hear peoples screams and the roar of fires, and I hope beyond hope that everyone I love is okay—even my parents. I think back on leaving Cade and Rowan, their family, and it hits me. I love Cade too. My stomach churns, and I feel like I’m going to be sick. How can I love two people? Be in love with two people? I dismount the horse and tie his reins to a close tree and sit to wait for Lily and play it all out in my bed. Of course, I still love Oberon, don’t I? Or do I just think I do because I should? Because loving Cade feels like a betrayal, yet I can’t deny the thought of him being hurt, or worse, makes my heart want to shrivel into dark nothingness. It makes me want to scream, the thought of him not being there, and I wonder why I left. Why didn’t I realize this sooner? Of course, I still love Oberon, but our love was different. It was from a darker place of need and pain. But with Cade, it’s not like that. We have history, but I loved him before all of the bad shit happened. He was the one who saved me time and again when I was younger, and he’s tried to save me again now, and I repaid him by running. What have I done?
I look around for Lily and her family, but there is no sign of them. I worry my bottom lip between my teeth, the dilemma of what to do. My heart wants me to run back to the Winter Palace, back to Cade, but I also need to make sure Lily is okay. I take a deep breath and clear my mind. Lily has her father. I’m sure he’ll get them out safely. I need to go back to the palace. I saw how bad it was there; they’ll need my help. I turn to undo Shadowind’s reins when I hear them coming and know it’s too late for me to try to hide.
“Well lookie, lookie boys. We came across a damsel in distress, and a princess nonetheless.” the Hunter in front of me taunts as the group of four with him snicker. “What should we do with such precious cargo?”
“Isn’t she Oberon’s?” one of the others asks, and the ringleader’s face darkens.
“If she is, she’s the reason he screams out each day and night. Maybe we should show her how that feels?”
“Not sure if I get much input here, but yeah. Totally not down for that,” I say, and steady my stance, preparing to fight. It’s been a long time since I fought anyone, and I’ve never fought a Hunter, but Erion’s words ring out in my head. Cover yourself and aim for the softest tissue. Eyes, ears, throat, so many sweet spots open to you Emilia. Use them and run. Your powers won’t always save you.
They creep closer, spreading out to surround me, and I reach inside of me to the fire that sits there. I may not have many gifts like some, but the one I have I know inside and out. My hand lights, and they pause.
“Is this really the best idea? There might be five of you, and one of me, but I was sent here to find Oberon. He is waiting for me.” I watch as they take in the information, but their ringleader just sneers at me. “I might not look like much, but you shouldn’t underestimate me either.” I call on my fire, wrapping it around me like a safety blanket.
“You’ve had your fun rolling around with the beast, but once we kill your precious family, and those Winter royals you hold so dear, maybe you’ll realize that you should have stuck to your own kind.” He launches at me, and I dodge and throw a fireball in his direction before I’m grabbed by another. I push my flames into the Hunter who holds me, who howls out in pain before he lets me go. I need to get back to Cade. I can’t let them hurt him.
“This isn’t over yet, princess.” I look to the voice and realize this Hunter is a female, her bald head shines in the moonlight. “Oberon was one of the good ones, and you thought you could just take him?” She dives towards, me and I feel the ice before I can lift my hands, and it hits me square in the chest. I feel as it runs through my veins with every beat of my heart, pushing it further, rendering me useless. I fight it, pushing all of my energy into creating a wall of fire around her, she jumps back, nearly falling into the flames, it takes almost everything I have left to keep it going. I fall to my knees at the weight of the cold inside of me, the ice in my veins makes it agony to move, to breathe. I refuse to give up yet. I am not going out without a fight. I think about Cade, Lily, Rowan, and everyone else who has ever caused me to have love or hate in my heart and I use it, creating a blast of fire against the others who wanted to hurt me. I hear their screams, which I know will haunt me. It’s not much, but it’s all I have left to protect myself against whatever else they wanted to throw at me. My eyesight blurs, and I feel the ice she put in my heart take hold, and I try not to let out a cry as my flames around her extinguish.
“Now, you’ll feel what it’s truly like to feel helpless.” She smiles before raising her hand and bringing it down against my cheek; it feels as if the bone splinters as she hits, knocking me to the ground. I hear laughter, and cry out as a foot hits my spine, thrusting me forward. I try to reach inside of me, to my fire, to thaw the ice in my bones, but it’s dying under the icy assault that she shoots at me once again. The laughter rains down around me as they take it in turns to beat me, each laughing more as another bone breaks, or my skin splits, and I bleed onto the ground.
When I can barely take any more, they tie me up, and I’m powerless to fight against them. I hear movement in the trees, and that’s when I see more Hunters—one carrying a body. They dump the body on the ground next to me, facedown in the dirt.
“Toby, glad you could join us, and you brought a toy. Ours is about done. Can’t keep ours, though.” The woman’s voice laughs. She comes over and kicks the body on to its side when I see her face. Lily.
“No, please, no. Leave her alone,” I cry out with what little voice I have.
“Oh, even better, the princess cares about her. Maybe we should make her watch as we play with her little friend.” She kneels down beside me and lifts my chin to meet her eyes, the point of her talon making me bleed where it digs into my skin. “Yes, I think that’s exactly what we’ll do.”
I try to cry out as they wake her from whatever magical sleep they had her in, but my voice is almost gone.
“What the hell? Where am I? Who the hell are you?” Lily shouts as she fights against the Hunter holding her. The woman who was torturing me slaps her around the face, and I wince as I hear the crack.
“Shut up, you pathetic little Fae bitch. Fates, I might kill you quickly just to stop that squeaky voice of yours. Or I might kill you slowly, just to see how much you can take, how much your friend can take before she passes out.” At her words, Lily notices me, broken and bleeding; their ropes somehow stopped me from healing, or it could just be the sheer amount of damage they caused.
“Emmy . . . What the fuck did you do to her?” she screeches and starts to struggle against the Hunter again. I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire fucking life. I struggle against the ropes, try to call on my fire, but my body is beyond beaten, and I have nothing left.
I helplessly watch as they bind her hands and ankles, and then hang her by her wrists from one of the trees lining the grove. The first guy who attacked me steps forward with a look of pure glee. He lengthens his talons and looks me directly in the eye before he cuts through her dress, leaving a trail of blood behind from the cuts he inflicts. Her screams shake me and struggle harder against the ropes binding me. I feel one of them loosen and try to focus on that rather than the screams being ripped from my best friend. The woman crouches down beside me and pulls my head up by my hair.
“Just want to make sure you’re enjoying the show,” she says icily, laughing at herself. I swear if I get free of this, she will be the first to die. I keep working at the rope on my wrist, loosening it with each go. I feel my wrist break free, and a rush of power fills me. I call my flames to the surface and press my hand against her face.
Her screams stop the Hunters torturing Lily and bring everyone rushing towards me. I send out st
reams of my fire, but there are so many of them now that with my diminished strength, they overwhelm me once again, raining down on me with their strength and power.
“Enough.” I hear her voice ring out before another icy blast wreaks havoc on my bleeding and broken body. “We need to get to the meeting point, and if we stay any longer, we’ll be late.”
“Kill the girl,” she barks, and the Hunter who carried Lily into the clearing walks over to her and slits her throat with his talons while another rebinds my ropes. I can do nothing but watch as the blood pours out of Lily. Tears run down my face for my friend who deserved so much more from life than this.
Once the blood stops, they cut her bindings, and the one who arrived with her throws her over his shoulders and leaves. My sobs drown out most of their words, but I hear their mumbles continue and their footsteps retreat.
I retreat inside myself and try to reach out to Cade though I know I don’t have that power no matter how much I wished I did, just to tell him how sorry I am. To tell him how much I wanted to come back to him, and that I’m sorry that I ever left. I realize that I was wrong before and that in letting go of my anger, some of the reasons I loved Oberon, the selfish reasons, are gone now, and I cry at my own stupidity as the blackness engulfs me.
***
“Oh my god, Emilia.” I hear the words and try to register the voice, but I can’t open my eyes, the pain is too much. I slip back into the darkness where it’s warm and lose myself.
Chapter Thirteen
I open my eyes and stretch out when it hits me. I don’t hurt. I sit up, and the room spins a little, and I’m back in my room at the Winter Palace.
“Steady on there, Emilia, you need to rest.” I look up and see Cybil smiling down at me sadly. I shake my head but try to stand.
“I need to see Cade.” I steady myself on the bed frame, and she walks towards me and offers me an arm. “What’s wrong?” I ask; she’s being too nice.
“I . . . It’s not my place to tell you. Let us go and find Master Cade.” She sweeps the hair off my face and treats me with a soft smile, and the pit of my stomach churns with dread.
“Please tell me that everyone is okay?” She pats my hand and walks me out of the door.
“You need to speak to Master Cade. Let’s go, just move slowly, you’re still healing. They only brought you in early this morning.
We got the healers in to see to most of your injuries, but there were a lot. I’ve never seen . . . I’m just glad you’re okay.” She guides me out of the room and through the palace, letting me take in the destruction and havoc that was wreaked on it during the attack. I see soldiers moving bodies, both Fae and Hunter alike. Others are working magik to rebuild damage to the structure, but each person is playing their part, and I can’t help but feel responsible and useless all at once. Guilt tars my tongue and I struggle to swallow. I can feel the grief pouring off of each and every person here, the weight of it on my shoulders. Cybil leads me up the partially rebuilt staircase and towards the library at the back of the boys’ wing.
She pushes the door open softly, and we walk in, Cade and Lanora sit together, crying. They look up at the sound of us entering, and Lanora flies at me.
“This is all your fault!” she screams. “I told you it was coming, and you didn’t listen. Why couldn’t you just listen to me!”
“Mother, calm yourself.” Cade places his hand on her arm and uses his powers to steady her, and she calms instantly.
“I’m so . . . sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this. How bad is it?” I ask around the lump in my throat. Cade hands Lanora over to Cybil, who guides her out of the room, whispering quietly to her.
“We took a lot of hits last night; we lost people. A lot of people.” His voice is hoarse, thick as he tries to keep his emotions in check. I take in his red-rimmed eyes, his tired appearance, and the redness of the skin on his arm.
“I’m sorry . . . I . . .” I try to find the words to tell him about Lily, but I can’t find it in me to say the words. It’s too fresh, too raw.
“Have you seen a healer, Cade?” I gesture to his arm, and he tugs at the sleeve of his shirt.
“I have more important things to deal with right now, plus you needed them more than I did.” His voice shakes, so I take his hand and make him sit with me.
“What happened, Cade? What happened after I saw you?”
“It’s my fault; I was distracted . . . I wasn’t paying attention. There was so much blood, Emilia. It was on my hands. I lost myself last night, fighting them, tearing through them to try and save him. But I was too late. I hesitated.” He cradles his head in his hands and falls into my lap, so I stroke his hair.
“This is not your fault, Cade. No one saw something like this coming.”
“I should have known. We should’ve been more prepared, but they turned on us, and now . . . so many people lost their lives because I wasn’t ready.”
“Who did you lose, Cade?” I ask, not wanting the answer, as my blood runs cold with fear.
“They cut his throat while they held me down Emilia. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t fight. Their strength, I wasn’t strong enough. My mother’s screams will haunt me for the rest of my life. I don’t want to say the words. I don’t want this to be real. I’m not ready for this.”
“I’m here, Cade. We’ll get through this together. We can get through any of it.” My words hold more strength than I feel, but I can feel the fine line he’s walking, and with his mother lost, I need him to keep it together, even if just for now.
“They killed my father, Emilia. The gutted him like an animal. He was drugged, under some kind of spell, unable to fight back. Those cowards! I felt the spray of it on my face as they cut into him, I can still feel it, replaying inside my mind. Rowan and I tried to fight back, but it was useless. Rowan got free, and he ran for Talia and Arabella, but they didn’t make it either. The soldiers arrived and pushed the Hunters back, but it was too late. They were already gone.”
“Rowan . . . he’s gone?” I can barely utter the words.
“No, Rowan is injured, but he will be okay soon enough.”
“Cade, I am so sorry,” I say as tears stream down my face. “This isn’t your fault, it’s mine. It’s all my fault.”
“There was nothing you could have done, Emilia.” He holds me tight, and guilt snakes around my heart when he comforts me as when his father died, and it’s because of my family. Because of me.
“Cade, I need to tell you something.”
“There is nothing you need to worry about Emilia; this was not your fault. The entire time you were gone, I was losing my mind, even with everything else I should have been focusing on, all I could think about was you, and if you were safe. It made me realize I can’t be without you, Emilia. You mean more to me than I ever thought possible, and when Erion brought you back to us, I died a little, thinking you might not make it. This is probably the worst time possible to say anything, in fact I know it is, but I can’t wait any longer . . .”
A knock interrupts him as the door opens, and Cybil returns with a sorry smile.
“Your majesty, your father’s council are asking for you. To arrange your coronation, the funerals, and our retaliation.”
“Thank you, Cybil, have them gather in the war room, I’ll be down shortly.” She nods and leaves us again, and my words are stuck in my throat. I don’t know if I can tell him.
“They attacked the Summer Court too,” I tell him and wait for the realization to hit him. “We can face the Hunters together and bring our courts together to do so. This isn’t all on you, Cade. You need to take the time to heal, to grieve.” I wince at my words, knowing I have more to say.
“I can’t do this without you, Emilia. Any of it. I was going to tell you today, I had it all planned out, but then all of this happened, but I picked you. My parents knew, I told them last night, before . . . You make me stronger; you keep me grounded, and you make me want to be a better man. A better king. We can rul
e together and face this new enemy side by side.” I feel myself pale at his words. I’m not ready for this, and I can’t do this. Not now. Not until he knows everything. It doesn’t matter how much I love him; he only thinks he loves me because he doesn’t know, and that thought terrifies me.
“They’re going to do my coronation in two weeks after we rebuild and bury our dead. We will have time to plan everything, and I want you there by my side. I’ll show you how to enjoy all of the darkness, show you we’re just swimming in the stars of the sky, not drowning in the shadows that grip us, and try to drag us down. I’ve never felt like this before, and I want you with me every step of the rest of our lives.”
I stand and take a step away from him. He’s never going to understand.
“Tell me you’ll be here when this is done, Emilia. That we can talk, that we can move forward together.”
“I can’t . . . There is more you don’t know Cade. I can’t do this with secrets between us, it’s going to bury us both. But once you know, you might not even want me like that anymore, Cade, and I’m scared. I don’t want to lose what we’ve only just got back.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Emilia. I’ve lost too much already. The thing that haunted me the most after everything that happened was all the things I’d never said to you. And with everything that’s happened, it’s glaringly obvious to me how short life can be, and how things out of our control can change everything, so I need to tell you now everything I never said. How I really felt, how I really feel about you.”
Summer Princess (Dark Fae Book 1) Page 13