Pig in a Poke

by Robert Ray Moon



  PIG IN A POLK

  Author Robert Ray Moon

  Copyright 2013 Robert Ray Moon

  ISBN: 9781310357664

  All rights reserved: No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any form or by any means - - electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording or by any other – except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the permission of the author.

  Chapter 1 The beginning

  Tis a strange title to be sure but the logic will prevail as the story unfolds.

  T’was not the night before Christmas but was certainly the night before something when Charlie and I were born. He were a might older than I, say fifteen minutes or so.

  Since Charlie was the name I would have selected if I had a choice (which I didn’t) the name Charlie were already taken when I arrived so for me, they settled on the name George.

  Something you need to know is both of our moms were at the birthing place at the rear of the midwives abode. The first sounds Charlie and I made were at that place.

  Later as boys Charlie and I would often go down to our birth place and the screams we heard were frightening although we eventually got used to it.

  We would try to hold our breath during screams. Charlie could make it once in awhile until the screaming stopped but I never could.

  I knew all about how the animals reproduced, but I couldn’t believe human beings did it the same way.

  Uncle Saul was the one I went to when I had an embarrassing question and this was one of them so when I couldn’t stand not knowing any longer it were to Uncle Saul’s place.

  I never failed to get an answer from him although I found out later he wasn’t always right on. In fact sometimes he missed it be by a lot and since this was so very important I decided to explore the question further.

  I discussed this with Charlie and he was as confused and interested as I was so we set out to find the answer. We laid out a plan which included asking the preacher’s wife. Then there was Miss Mary cause she had a new little one every year for a number of years, actually until her husband died later on.

  We heard there were some ladies that might know about it but they were way down on our list for it was said they charged for information.

  The time came when we started out on our pursuit for knowledge and we went to the preacher’s wife. Charlie said maybe we should ask the preacher, but I thought since the wife was the one who produced the children, we should go to the horse’s mouth so to speak.

  Gingerly we knocked on the back door of the preacher’s house and the wife came and asked what we wanted. It was decided Charlie should do the talking cause he was the oldest.

  I couldn’t hear exactly what he said, cause he talked real low but I reckoned she heard him for she started hitting him over the head with a broom and then started in on me.

  She began to call us names I never heard in church and we were told never to darken the church’s door again.

  My ma was pretty upset when we refused to go with her on Sunday any longer.

  Ma thought we were being disobedient, but it was either obey her or the preacher’s wife and we decided to obey the preacher’s wife because we saw her buying a new broom at the general store.

  We didn’t want her to wear out her new broom on us so we avoided her from then on. That was discouraging, but after a few days we forgot about it (almost) and pursued our quest again.

  Chapter 2 Out behind the Barn Education

  We knew Miss Mary had just had another little one and if she was going to have more babies she would have to get started on it pretty soon.

  The only thing we had found out so far was it took nine months to have a baby just like the cows do. And we knew how the cows did it so each evening we would go down to Mary’s house and look in the windows.

  Sure enough our spying paid off and we discovered people and cows do the same thing to have young’uns.

  Having solved that mystery we wondered what else we should look into.

  Charlie said, I wonder how the seeds turn into turnips. I thought about that for quite awhile. Finally said I don’t know but maybe we can find out.

  Ma had planted some turnip seeds and they were coming up. We went down to the garden and pulled the plants up so as we could see what those seeds were doing.

  Just about the time we were figuring out how the seeds worked Ma was hitting both of us with her broom again and again.

  I still wonder just what is with these women and their brooms. That hard head binding on them could knock your lights out.

  Ma wouldn’t allow me at the table for the next three days saying I destroyed my food just for the fun of it and could just go hungry as far as she was concerned.

  If it hadn’t been for Charlie bringing me some food I would have starved.

  After three days I asked Ma if I could come back to the table because I had replanted the turnip seeds and they should be coming up in a few days. She still looked mad but said yes and hoped I had learned my lesson.

  Three days was about as long as she could stay mad at me especially if she had got a few licks in with her broom. I was pretty good for the next week. It might have been because Charlie had gone to visit his grandma.

  As soon as he got back he had some ideas that kinda skirted what was right.

  While Charlie was down at his grandma’s one of his older cousins told him some tales that perked Charlie’s interest to the point he talked me into joining in with him.

  He said for me to get my life savings for I would need it. I counted out my money and it came to exactly five dollars and ten cents. When I saw Charlie he said for me to give it to him and he had a dollar so we had six dollars.

  He said that he thought it would be enough... That night we went down to this house where this giant who was black stood at the door.

  Charlie started to go in and the giant said do you have any money? Charlie said sure, we have six dollars. The big black man took the money and said go on in.

  Once inside I saw these large women with strange looking clothes on. And again, well some of them didn’t have much on at all that is. All me and Charlie could do was to look at them for we had never seen anything like it, not even at the circus.

  The women was looking at us and laughing which made me uncomfortable. Then one of them grabbed Charlie and took him into a room and about three minutes later Charlie came out looking dazed. He turned his eyes toward me and said, “Let’s go.”

  I followed him and once we came to the giant I asked him if I could get my money back for I didn’t go into the room. He grabbed me by the neck and gave me a swift kick with the biggest shoe I had ever seen.

  I landed out beyond the steps standing up and just kept on walking. He looked at Charlie and asked, “Do you want your money back?”

  Charlie said, “No sir, I’m good,” and he caught up with me.

  After the pain subsided enough for me to talk, I asked him what happened and he said, “I’m not sure. All I know is one minute I wanted to be there and the next was I ready to leave.” I said, “All this happened in less than three minutes?”

  He said he would think about it and tell me later, which he never did.

  Chapter 3 Slight Misunderstanding

  About a week later I was walking pretty good and the bruising was almost gone although there was still some pain when I sat down, but it was tolerable.

  Charlie came over and we laughed about the evening, but I wished I had my five dollars back.

  Ma heard us talking and had a good idea what happened but she figured I had to get it out of my system so she didn’t get down on me.

  She did see
me down at the creek washing up and saw my bruising, but still kept quite about it and didn’t question me like Charlie’s Ma did. She got the whole story out of him and eventually she told my Ma and a whole lot of other people.

  All I had kept was the ten cents and I couldn’t work for a couple of weeks. It was going to take me a long time to save up some money again for I didn’t make much and I give almost everything I earn to Ma.

  Since Pa left us Ma had a hard time making a living for us. She had a big garden, some chickens and raised a hog or two for the killing in the early winter. With the money she made taking in washing and sewing for others we barely got by, but to me, I thought we lived pretty good.

  As the days went by, working and schooling was about all we did.

  Charlie said there is pot luck on Saturday and we should go. I agreed cause there was always more food than you could eat and it was free. When we got there it wasn’t a pot luck, but was a box social where the women fixed baskets full of food to bid on and when you won you got to sit with them while eating.

  Neither of us had much money so we watched all the pretty girls’ baskets being bid on and sold. Then it got down to the not-so-pretty girls and the bids were still too high for us. After that the only boxes left were fixed by some older spinsters and grandmas.

  Even the spinster’s boxes were too high but when they got to the grandmas we proudly began to bid. There were some other boys in the same financial condition as we were and they looked hungry.

  They kept out bidding us and then there were some old men that joined in. I suspected some of them had their eye on one of the widows. Some of the widows were fixed pretty well. They had their own home and a bank account.

  After a while I had the highest bid and a few baskets later Charlie won one.

  As soon as I had won the bid some woman came over and said “you are mine” as she led me off I could see Charlie being hugged by a very large woman as he cast his eyes in my direction.

  Chapter 4 Eating and Courting

  As it turned our baskets were filled with the best food in the place. These grandmas really know how to cook and feed a man.

  We sat over by ourselves and had a good time listening to the stories the grandmas told about their old beaus, some of which we had heard before.

  As it turned out from the stories they told, we learned they did some foolish things just like me and Charlie have done and they enjoyed telling about it.

  While those young girls looked good when it come to food it was the grandmas who got the job done.

  While we feasted the guys with the somewhat pretty ones gagged it down and tried to enjoy the company of the girls.

  Charlie went over to some of them with a beautifully cooked chicken leg and waved it in front of their nose so they could smell what chicken should smell like. It didn’t take long for the guys to get enough of that and promised Charlie they would see him tomorrow. Charlie had heard that before and just laughed and said; okay if you ain’t too sick to show up.

  The old grandma I was with smiled an unusual kinda smile and said you are going to have to walk me home after we have a dance or two.

  All of a sudden I stopped enjoying the food. I knew the food hadn’t changed so I knew it must be something she said to me. I didn’t have time to think on it for long cause she took my arm and the next thing I knew we was dancing up a storm.

  As it turned out she was a spry old thing and I could hardly keep up with her. I looked over and the one Charlie ate with was large and dragging him around the floor by his belt. It struck me as being funny, the two of us and our dates.

  After we were done tuckered out from dancing, my date for dinner took my arm and said, “Get the basket and let’s go home.”

  I don’t mind telling you I was scared stiff. She had a grip on me that I didn’t think I could break. Her grip tighten even tighter the closer we got to her house and I was feeling sick and faint about then.

  When we turned into the gate she reached for her key and I had my chance to take off running.

  I dropped the basket and yelled goodbye, as I ran away. In the distance I could hear her yelling; “Come back, come back.” Her yelling only made my feet go faster.

  Some days later I thought about that frightful experience and concluded it could have been worse. One of the things that could have made it worse was she could have kissed me. I don’t now if I could have handled that for while we were eating I watched her suck on a chicken leg. I shuddered to think what her kisses would have been like with all that suction.

  Charlie spent part of the night with his date. He said by the time they got to her house she was so tired she went to her bed and passed out because all that dancing wore her out. He said he finished the left over chicken and then went home.

  Then the word got around that we liked older women. All this talk was being helped by some of our school mates.

  We didn’t really mind that until some of the older widows began smiling at us and inviting us to come over and chop some wood for them.

  They would say, “I hear you like fried chicken. You haven’t tasted fried chicken until you have had some of mine.” Them saying that tickled Charlie but I didn’t like the way they looked when they said it.

  I always had a ready excuse for not going over to their house. Charlie had a weakness for fried chicken and ever so often he would chop some wood so he said.

  Chapter 5 Enough, Enough!

  My experience dating older women was over after that episode, and I didn’t go to town for several days.

  A man from another town started coming over and sitting in the parlor with Ma. This went on for about four months with them sitting closer all the time. It kinda embarrassed me so I stayed out of the parlor either in the kitchen or my bedroom.

  Late one night I came down from my room to get some water and peeked into the parlor and from what I saw the man was way too familiar with Ma except she wasn’t objecting about it. In fact she was enjoying what was going on.

  Pa had been gone for five years and I knew Ma was lonely so that probably accounted for her behavior still I felt obligated to go get the shot gun.

  In the middle of …. Er … what was happening, I said when you get finished with what you are doing we are going to see the preacher. He started to object but when I pulled the trigger and shot a hole in the floor near his foot he said “I’m ready, let’s go.”

  They straighten their clothes and we went down to the justice of the peace and shortly I had a new daddy. After that I went over to Charlie’s place and spent the night.

  A day later my new daddy showed up with all his stuff and moved completely moved in. I can’t say I didn’t like the man it was I just I didn’t have any feeling at all about him one way or the other.

  Along with him came his mother for he said he had to take care of her. The next thing I knew she wanted my room. In fact she moved her stuff in there and said this is a big room and is big enough for both of us.

  When she went back downstairs I packed my few duds and went over to Charlie’s and told him I was going to Texas. He wanted to know what brought this on so I told him what was going on and I just came by to say goodbye.

  He said to wait a few minutes and he would go with me. I took what money I had saved up with me and Charlie got all his savings and off we went. We walked, rode, and even went by boat working along the way.

  Seems that often there were chores that the husband didn’t want to do and the wife would hire us to do them. We would get some food and money and made out pretty well.

  It took us a month but we were over in the middle of Texas. They were looking for cowboys for the most part but we got the jobs doing what they didn’t want to or wouldn’t do.

  I didn’t like the work but did the best job I could, after all I had a place to sleep and food to eat and fifteen dollars a month.

  After six months of that w
e heard there was a gold strike in a place called California. Several of the cowhands were going out there so we decided to go also. By this time we had saved some money but were determined to work our way west.

  Chapter 6 I am a cowboy

  We hooked up with a wagon train and the wagon master saw we was dressed in cowboys garb so he said he would take us on as scouts and wranglers. He already had the main scout but he didn’t have time to hunt for fresh meat for the wagon train.

  The trip was going to take four months and they needed a lot of fresh meat and that became our primary job. During the trip they supplied us with horses and gear and more importantly, food. We had to supply our own guns.

  We met a man in town who said he had some guns he didn’t really want to sell but because we were going west we would need them so for a price he would let them go. He had a couple of old rusty looking rifles and some of what he called six shooters.