‘I’m going to need to head off,’ I told Jim. ‘I’m going to be with my family for Christmas for the first time since I ran away nearly fifteen years ago.’
‘Sounds like you have a story too.’
‘I do, but I was very lucky. Mine was one with a happy ending. Would you do me a favour? If Zoe stops by again in the New Year, would you ask her to come to The Chocolate Pot and ask for me? Any day but Sunday. Tell her there’s a hot drink and a meal waiting for her.’
‘And what’s really waiting for her?’
‘I’m not sure yet but the cogs are whirring. It might not come to anything so please don’t say there’s anything more than a meal in it for her.’
‘I won’t. Now off you go and join your family. Thank you for today.’
‘It’s been an absolute pleasure. Happy Christmas, Jim.’
‘Happy Christmas, Tara.’
I turned towards the kitchen to retrieve my coat and bag.
‘Oh, Tara,’ Jim said. ‘I don’t know what made you run away but I’m glad you did because you’ve made such a difference to this place. Even if whatever you’re scheming for Zoe comes to nothing, you’ve changed people’s lives. Never forget that.’
Driving back from The Hope Centre to The Chocolate Pot, I felt all warm and fuzzy inside from Jim’s kind words, my wonderful day so far, and life in general. Just a quick freshen up and change of clothes and then I’d pick Jed up from his parents’ house and drive us both to Whitby for an evening meal with my parents.
Smiling contentedly, I unlocked the door to the café.
‘Happy Christmas!’
I squealed as the lights flicked on and I took in the sea of smiling faces in front of me.
‘What are you all doing here?’
Jed stepped forward and gave me a gentle peck on the lips. ‘You’ve spent all morning and most of the afternoon doing nice things for other people and we wanted to do something nice for you in return.’
I made my way through the throng, hugging everyone and exchanging season’s greetings. Jed’s family were there, as were my parents, plus Carly and Liam, Bethany and Joshua, and Maria, Marc and their kids. The tables had been pushed together to make one long banqueting table covered in festive napkins, decorations and crackers. Silver food warmers were spread along the centre, interspersed with wooden bowls overflowing with bread buns, and a giant turkey took pride of place at the head of the table.
‘We’ve made Christmas dinner for those who haven’t eaten yet,’ Mum said, ‘and it’s turkey sandwiches for those who’ve had theirs already. Unless they’re feeling extra hungry.’
‘I can’t believe you’ve all done this for me. Thank you so much. Do I have time to nip upstairs and get changed?’
‘Ten minutes,’ Jed said, putting his arm round my waist and kissing my forehead.
I’d thought that Christmas Eve had been loud but Christmas Day completely eclipsed it. Gazing round the table at my friends and family laughing and drinking, my face actually ached from smiling so much. So this was what it felt like when you fully let people in? It wasn’t scary. My protective tower had crumbled but it hadn’t left me feeling exposed and vulnerable like I’d expected. It had invited in a feeling of warmth, safety and happiness.
‘I’d like to propose a toast,’ Jed said, standing up and holding out his glass of bubbly after we’d finished our main course. ‘Two toasts actually. Firstly, I’d like to say a massive welcome to Tara’s parents, Kirsten and Tim. You raised a wonderful woman and I’m so glad you’re back in her life.’
‘To Mum and Dad,’ I said as everyone else toasted them by their names.
‘And secondly a toast to Tara. When we first met, it was right here nearly fifteen years ago and I’m proud to say that I created a lasting impression on her. I’m not so proud to say that it wasn’t a positive one.’ He paused while everyone laughed. ‘They say there’s a thin line between love and hate and I’m so glad we crossed that line because I can’t remember what life was like without Tara by my side and I never want to be without her again. To Tara!’
‘To Tara!’
Had he just told me he loved me? It certainly sounded that way. And I felt exactly the same.
By 9 p.m. everyone had gone home and the café was clean with the tables put back to normal. Jed said he had to nip over to Yorkshire’s Best to get something and would meet me in the flat. I left all the doors off the latch and went upstairs to give Hercules a hug, light the log burner and pour Jed and me a Baileys on ice.
I’d just lifted Hercules onto the sofa beside me when Jed reappeared. ‘I know we said we wouldn’t do gifts but I’ve got a gift for you.’
‘Jed! No! That’s not fair. I knew you’d do this and you promised me you wouldn’t.’ We’d agreed that we’d been together for such a short space of time and, with both working such long hours in the run-up to Christmas, it was going to be a struggle to find time to shop for meaningful gifts so we’d go away together for a weekend in February or March instead.
‘I know I did and I will never break any other promises to you but I had to do this and you’ll see why when you open them.’
‘Them? There’s more than one?’
‘There are two. Close your eyes first.’
I closed my eyes and listened to his footsteps moving away from me then coming closer again.
‘Remember I said I’d never painted a rabbit and I’d love to paint Hercules? I saw an opportunity to make a matching pair with the first painting that spoke to you. Open your eyes.’
I pressed my fingers to my mouth. ‘Oh my God!’ It was a clifftop scene looking down on the lighthouse but from a different angle and, instead of a sheep, Hercules was perched on the cliff in a field of daisies. The glow from an enormous full moon behind the lighthouse made the colours brighter than on the sheep painting.
‘I’ve captioned it: When your lighthouse finds you and guides you home.’
I shook my head in disbelief. ‘How do you keep doing it? Every time I think you can’t do anything more amazing than the thing you’ve just done; you go and do something even more amazing.’
He grinned. ‘You like it then?’
‘I absolutely love it and that caption couldn’t be more perfect.’
‘What do you think, buddy?’ Jed said, nodding towards Hercules. ‘I think it’s a pretty good likeness.’ He propped it up against the wall beneath my original one. They were going to look so amazing mounted together.
‘Second gift,’ he said, his eyes twinkling with excitement. ‘I took a gamble with this one. It’s got a connection to your past and, from the positive reaction to the best decorated house competition yesterday, I’m hoping it will make you happy too.’
‘Intriguing,’ I said, untying the bow and removing the paper. Inside was a plain cardboard box, revealing nothing about its contents. Giving Jed a quizzical look, I opened the lid and gasped.
‘You said it got smashed to pay for The Best Day Ever and never got replaced. I thought you might like to keep this with your snow globe.’
‘Oh, Jed. I can’t believe you found this.’ I lifted out the Terramundi money pot and ran my fingers over the money slot. ‘It’s The Chocolate Pot, just like the one we used to have.’
‘Not exactly. Turn it round.’
I carefully twisted the pot round. Painted on the other side was a carousel. ‘The Best Day Ever,’ I whispered, running my fingers over the picture. ‘How did you find such a perfect match?’
‘I didn’t. I ordered a ceramic pot and I painted it myself from what you described.’
‘It’s the most beautiful, most meaningful gift that anyone has ever given me. The detail… It’s perfect. All of it. I really can’t believe you did this for me.’ I gently placed the pot on the coffee table.
‘I did it for the reason Loudmouth Lucy said yesterday – because I love you and I want to make you happy. I realised earlier that I might have given away how I feel about you in front of our family and friends bef
ore saying it to you in person first. I do love you, Tara, so very much.’
‘I love you too, Jed. You somehow manage to surprise and astonish me every single day.’
‘You do the same to me. And you inspire me too. You’ve been through so much yet you’ve not let life get you down. You’ve taken a failed business and turned it into the heart of the community, and you’ve shown so much kindness to others even though you’ve been hurting inside and needed comfort yourself.’
He lowered his lips to mine and kissed me so softly and tenderly, I felt as though my insides had turned to liquid.
‘I think it’s going to take a long time for me to see myself the way others seem to see me but thank you for helping me try to do that.’
Jed smiled as he lightly stroked my cheek and kissed me again. ‘Back in Aus, when things were falling apart with Ingrid but before I discovered that Aaron wasn’t mine, I remember seeing this picture in a shop window. It said, “To see a person – to really see them – is to notice all of their magic. To love a person – to really love them – is to remind them of their magic when they’ve forgotten it’s there”. I stood there, reading those words over and over and wondering what the hell I was doing with Ingrid. She had no magic in her. Never had done. And do you know who popped into my head? You. I remembered that first time I saw you and that overwhelming urge to capture your image on paper. Even when you were at your most defeated, I saw your magic and I intend to remind you every single day that it’s there.’
A tear trickled down my cheek. ‘That has to be the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me.’
‘I mean every word. I know you’ve got stuff to deal with and so have I but I promise you right here and now that I will never hurt you and, aside from the lying about not doing Christmas gifts thing, I’ll always be honest with you too.’
I smiled. ‘I might forgive you for the Christmas gifts, considering how amazing they were. And I’ll always be honest with you too, Jed, and I’ll be right by your side, whatever happens with Aaron. I know that he’s angry now and is refusing to even speak to the girls but he’ll come round. None of us know whether he’ll want you back in his life but I’m sure he’ll be willing to hear the truth when he calms down. It’s just going to take a lot of patience and a lot of courage and I know you’ve got both.’
As we kissed again, I knew that the ghosts from past had finally been exorcised and the future was mine for the taking. I was glad that I’d met Garth and glad that he’d betrayed me because, without that, I’d never have fled to Whitsborough Bay, I’d never have found my business, my home and my new family, and I’d never have met Jed. I was glad that Leanne had shown me such a lack of respect because I now recognised and valued real, genuine friendships. Glad to have met Garth and Leanne? It really was possible to see the positives in every single situation. And from now on, I was always going to do that. Pollyanna was back and looking forward to the New Year with her friends, the man she loved, and her family.
I was no longer lost and lonely because I’d found my lighthouses. Lots of them. They’d always been there. I just hadn’t been willing to let them shine their lights and guide me to safety. Until now. A few minutes of courage really had changed my life and we were both going to face plenty more courageous moments as we dealt with the past and moved our relationship forward but we’d take those steps together as equal partners. We’d be brave.
Acknowledgments
Starry Skies Over The Chocolate Pot Café started life as Christmas at The Chocolate Pot Café and was an independent release two years ago shortly before Christmas. When I secured a publishing deal with Boldwood Books, I was thrilled that they wanted to take on my back catalogue, starting with the Welcome to Whitsborough Bay series and this story. Having not worked with an editor on it, I was excited to see how a fresh pair of eyes would breathe new life into it.
We’ve had a change of title for several reasons. Firstly, the book has had quite a major edit with several new chapters in the middle and at the end. It’s still the same main character, setting and plot as before but there are several new treats along the way. The story finishes later than before too, making the ending even more satisfying. Secondly, the additional chapters in the middle meant that quite a bit more of the story takes place away from Christmas so it didn’t feel as appropriate to have ‘Christmas’ in the title because it’s not just a Christmas book. Finally, it’s a fresh release so it felt right to give it a fresh cover and new title.
I thank my husband, Mark, and our daughter, Ashleigh, in all of my books and it’s only right that I thank them again in this one. I’m really fortunate that Mark is self-employed, like me, so he works erratic hours when the work arises and therefore ‘gets’ it. He also has a creative passion as a photographer so he never complains about me drifting off into my imaginary world, knowing that he’s free to roam with the camera whenever he wants.
Ashleigh is at senior school and her evenings are now full with her usual activities, some after school clubs, and homework. I feel a little less guilty about writing on an evening (fitting it round my day job as an HR Tutor) when she’s not available herself!
A fabulous team of beta readers help me by reading my work, spotting typos and providing feedback. Thank you to my mum, Joyce Williams, my good friend and fellow writer, Sharon Booth, and long-term friend, Liz Berry for their work on the original version of this book.
And it’s to Liz that I dedicate this book. I try to dedicate my books to someone who has a link to the story in some small way. In Starry Skies Over The Chocolate Pot Café, Tara reconnects with her family after reading a letter from her foster-mother and it’s through letters that I met Liz. I was 14 and in London for a youth club weekend. The weekend culminated in a rendezvous in one of London’s parks during which attendees threw a pompom into the crowd with their name and address attached to it. Liz caught mine, wrote to me really quickly, and I eagerly responded. Over the next decade or two, we wrote to each other regularly and I always experienced a thrill when I got home from school/college/work to find a letter from Liz waiting for me, packed full of news. I lived in Teesside and Liz lived in West Sussex so meeting up wasn’t an option but we finally managed it when we were in our late twenties. We’ve since met on several occasions and it’s always so lovely to catch up. Sadly, we don’t write to each other anymore as messages on social media have taken over but I am so thankful that Liz caught my pompom that day because she’s provided friendship, support and happiness for over 30 years now. Not many pen pals last beyond a few letters but we certainly made it work.
I’d also like to thank my writing friends Jo Bartlett and Lynne Davidson for some valuable insight into the world of fostering. Their guidance on this was really appreciated. If there are any errors in any aspect of how this works it will be down to my misinterpretation.
Another thank you goes to the amazing North Yorkshire-based artist, Lucy Pittaway, who is the inspiration behind Jed’s artwork as well as his story as to how he became the artist he is. Lucy creates the most delightful pictures full of warmth and colour, an iconic range being her sheep and highland cows. They feature stunning Yorkshire countryside in all seasons and weathers, with some recognisable landmarks in many of her images. For Jed, I therefore took Lucy’s concept but on a Yorkshire Coast setting.
On holiday in the Yorkshire Dales several years ago, my husband and I purchased a limited edition print of Lucy’s from a gallery in Richmond. A month before I finished writing the original version of this book, we visited Richmond again to see if we could pick up another of Lucy’s prints, knowing she’d since opened her own gallery there. What a surprise I had when I saw where her gallery was: the same premises where I’d set up and run a specialist teddy bear shop in 2003-2005. Running Bear’s Pad was a very special time in my life because I started writing while I had the shop, during quiet days, and it was as a result of having my own business that I met my husband. To have started my writing journey in Bear’s Pad, to h
ave bought one of Lucy’s prints many years later, to have decided on her as the inspiration for the artist in my book, then to discover her gallery was in the same premises where I started my writing journey felt like destiny.
If you’d like to see Lucy’s work, please check out: www.lucypittaway.co.uk
There’s also a lovely video on You Tube about Lucy’s work: https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=6&v=RfaetaCoL7g
I’m enormously grateful to the team at Boldwood Books for being such an amazing and supportive publisher. I’m so proud to be part of Team Boldwood. My editor, Nia Beynon, is a dream to work with, full of fabulous improvements and encouragement. And thanks to Dushi Horti and Sue Lamprell for their copy editing and proofreading talents, as well as the designer Debbie Clement for the gorgeous cover.
Finally, my thanks go to you, my readers and listeners. If you’ve enjoyed any of my books, it would be amazing if you could tell others by leaving a review online and also recommending my stories to friends and family. Reviews make a massive difference to an author. You’ll see some really long reviews but you don’t need to write an essay. A positive rating and a short sentence are equally welcome.
Big hugs
Jessica xx
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